This album was so jarring that I recorded myself talking to a friend and then transcribed it for posterity.
C: This could be metal at any moment--I'm just warning everybody.
R: Either that or it could build up into a power ballad.
C: I feel like we might have to excuse ourselves here for a second. We might have to leave.
R: This is one of those guitar sounds that when he hits a note, about a million lights jump up on his guitar rig.
C: Any minute now there is gonna be a squealy.
R: Is this, like, Queensryche?
C: If it is, let's turn it off right away because I hate that band.
R: Hate it. This is the kind of music you listen to right when you start to get your pubic hairs.
C: I can't even be fair to this music, I hate it so bad. I can't even sit through one song. I know I'm not being fair but I think it is complete garbage. That sort of guitar playing is just stupid.
R: If I want to hear a metal band I really like old Black Sabbath and Soundgarden, heavy bands with brains. If I were listening to an angry metal band I would be more into Rage Against the Machine or Sugar. I like that Sugar record a lot, I like Sonic Youth a lot. That's heavy, guitar based music that I listen to.
C: Playing fast for the sake of fast is hideous. I hate that whole mentality of sitting around playing scales and cock-rock crap.
R: I heard some squealies. I don't really like that sound either. I'm not into those guitar sounds. When I hear that stuff I get feeling squeamish.
That was Dream Theater.
C: We'll remember not to buy that record. I bet they have really nice hair... now I'm being mean.
R: This is just our opinion. There's a lot of people that like Dream Theater and that's fine. They get off on it--good for them. They'll probably hate us, maybe they won't.
C: They probably do because we sound like we're playing sloppy. But that's alright, that's a different thing. We're just coming from a different space.
R: In no way do we condemn this sort of music. These people have a right to exist.
C: Just keep it the hell away from us.