Click Hereand Here!“Holy crap, Gene, this theme is crapping all over the submitted songs!”
“Hush, Brain. LOOK AT THE SIZE OF THAT RUSSIAN!”
300 pounds of muscle and ESP powers, Nikolmind Volkoff strolls down the catwalk, smiling at the interviewer coming up to meet him. Should he tell the man his wife is currently being boned by the mailman or that he really needs to have that cough checked? Humans, amusing creatures.
“Good evening, Nikolai. You really killed it in the qualifier stage!”
“_____ ___, ____ ___”
“Come again? We don't hang men in this country, you know”
“____ ___!”
And so he leaves for the ring, giving a bunch of d20's as gift to a kid who didn't steal mom's money while left alone with her purse two months ago, and scowling towards a young man who is keeping a couple of Radiohead tickets in his backpoket. Neural connections, cute toys.
TAC, whose closest experience with eastern Europe – Dino Radja – left him disappointed, taunts the newcomer:
“C'mere, bub! You think you're so wicked smaht? Let's see what you've got!”
“I have
Evan Carson – Otriad, you have
At Night I Fly – Wanted to Be, the PED user in braids has
Destiny Potato – Lunatic, while the bearded gentleman hiding his baldness with bandanas has
Orphaned Land – Ocean Land. Any other questions, my friend who used to scalp Green Monster tickets from '94 to '97?”
Brains, children books.
“That joke is spent, Indi. Your wife is entering the studio in 22 seconds and she would hate to catch you mansturbating to Tifa Lockhart”
“Grazie”* zip *
Meanwhile, on the other side of the ring:
“Hey, mate”
“Yo!”
“
Yo?”
“I fancy myself a rapper”
“Cheers. I see you worried, how so?”
“I brought growlies”
“Me too!”
“Great, then I can fight you! I'm so kicking your ass with the buzuki!”
“I brought tango”
“Shit, I can't beat you. Go get the ruskie”
Back to Rocky IV:
“My dear normal decent metal-head fellow, congratulations. Indi has struggled all day long with our tunes. He has found mine richer in orchestration and melodically classier during the quite touching violin harmonies, yours more dynamic in songwriting and more exciting during the intense guitar solo. In a pickle, he ultimately admitted my song was strangely monorythmic – despite being composed by a drummer – and felt like 11 minutes while being 8, while yours perfectly tells its story – with incredibly close to home lyrics – and felt like 8 minutes while being 11. He didn't like both our vocalists much: I think the words “blow” and “goats” have been mentioned. I will show myself out now before I'm forced to repeat myself to the polite brit chap. I have to sic the Tarrasque on my D&D party.”
And he vanishes like Dr Manhattan. There comes the Bulldog.
“Hey, TAC. Where is he gone?”
“Beats the shit outta me. By the way, WTF is the Tarrasque?”
“A Nissan SUV, I gather”
Challenges:
lonestar targeted ariich
Evermind targeted TAC
ariich and TAC targeted Evermind
Eliminated:
Evermind. I hope you are leaving this roulette more satisfied than you left the last one. I know I'm happy with the music you sent me: you have dominated the regular season for a reason. Thank you!
Survivors:
ariich
lonestar
TAC
Song Standings:
Destiny Potato – Lunatic
Orphaned Land – Ocean Land
At Night I Fly – Wanted to Be
Evan Carson - Otriad