The pathetic facebook status thread.

[Sir GuitarCozmo]

  Oops.  Well, usually I see that happening as more of a "I'm a blond 20-something, look at me use lots of extraneous letters, aren't I cute?" kind of thing.

[Aramatheis]

like, heyyyyy there sailor
 wanna partay wid mee? Gunna be soo much funnnnnnnnnn!

[Sir GuitarCozmo]

Something like that.

[Gadough]

Yeah, the only people that do that are dumb 16-25 white girls.

Edit: and kingshmegland

[lonestar]

Yeah, the only people that do that are dumb 16-25 white girls.

Edit: and kingshmegland

[King Postwhore]

Yeah, the only people that do that are dumb 16-25 white girls.

Edit: and kingshmegland

Yoooour soooooooo dead!

[Orbert]

deaddddd

[lonestar]

 

[Gadough]

"porn should be illegal. its revoltingly disgusting and degrading. and so are the people that watch it."

[ThroughHerEyesDude6]

Yay for Porn

[Pyroph]

Not mine, but amusing:

[MetalManiac666]

Not mine, but amusing:

https://i.imgur.com/ymEvj.jpg

[Chino]

The only reason this kid is still on my friends list is for the sake of this thread. These are all in order.



"Chillen with my Nigga tom feelin pretty loose!! Straight chillen but missin wifey :/."

"yup what do ya kno i fucked up again! ;/"

"Just got another landscaping job makin 14 an hr gonna be stackin some serious fuckin money!!!!!!!"

"Meetin with my laywer then to the courthouse! Prayin they say time served!!!!"

"Fml on my way to the courthouse! Hopefully for the last time!"

"feeling pretty empty since my niggas gonna be gone for 7 years!!! fucking bullshit!!!!!!! Fuck ever single cop there is!!!1 yall can go fuck yourself if im see you your getting hit with a egg"

"Well off to the ducking courthouse!!! Wish me like"

"Feeling very empty and alone "

"Chillen with my nigga seany!!! $$$2-10 then dinner with my wifey!!!!! ♥"

"Pay day baby!!!! Working 2-10 then chillen!!! Hit a nigga up!!"

"Working 6-2 the"Chillen with wifey and my nigga's!!!!! n chillen with wifey♥"

"Couldn't be any happier than I am now!!! Love ya abbey!!!!!"

"Up way to early:/! Missing my baby and im tired of being sick every morning!!!! Deff quit smoking today!!!"

"Work till 10 then outback steak house with my beautiful lady!!! ♥"

"Mad as fuck!! Getting a blunt then going home!!!"

"chillen with my nigga jon!! hit me up A.L.♥"

"Missing my wifey!!! Stuck working till 2 then who knows! Hit me up A.L. ♥"

"Think im getting a sinus infection! FML!!! working 2-10 then chillen with my nigga! "

"Gotta love when people talk bells shit about me smoking when all they do is drink and smoke!! Like really!?? Dumb fucking hoes!!!!!"

"I fucked up really bad!! I feel so hurt and alone right now!! I don't even know what to do with myself"

"Bored outta my mind!! Wish I had a L!!"

"cup inside of cup smokin' ghost face killa, got these boppers goin crazy, nigga im the man!! workin 2-10 then chillen hit me up!!! A.L. ♥"

"Loves seeing that $500 check every Thursday!!! Working 2-10 then chillen!!! A.L.♥"

"Sick of the bullshit!!!!! Work 4-8 then straight chillen for the night!!! Hit me up!!"

*Matty Lodge went from being "in a relationship" to "single."*
"im so heartbroken right now and i feel so alone!!!!! about to go overdose"

His default.



yeahhhh, I'm supa fly



Not one, but TWO middle fingers, don't forget the blunt smoke.



I'm too cool to acknowledge the mirror.



I loiter in clothing outlets.



LOL (I'm still convinced he took this one himself, put something in his pants, and tried to look like he was asleep)

[Chino]

Yay for Porn

[lonestar]

*god what a douche*

Nice little up and down emotional cycle, therapy much?

[blackngold29]

Kind douche couldn't be much worse if he tried, although it seems like he is.

And +1 to Chino. Child please!

[blackngold29]

'No shirt, no shoes, and I still get service.'

from a girl.

Not sure if that or the six people who liked it are worse.

[True Death of Life]

*god what a douche*

Nice little up and down emotional cycle, therapy much?

Oh my god, how old is he?



Been seeing way too many of these:

I just wanna be in a happy non dramatized relationship , where can i find a boy thats faithful & can be my type all in one ? Maybe i'm asking for too much :/ ♥

And this chick is constantly posting statuses that are actually messages you her PERFECT BOYFRIEmD OMGEEEEEEEEEEEEE...tell me again why we all have to see them? Well, either that or everything just happens to suck.

 "I need you to tell me when im being unreasonable and when im being rude. because i love you and i wanna make myself the type of girl you deserve."

"Soo my night was fucking ruined. im just soo done with everything now."

"I will love you until the end of time. No matter what happens. ♥"

"Was in a shitty mood then i listened to angels & airwaves and avril lavigne and i'm soo happy. =) makes me think of my wonderful of boyfriend."

"Omg i love my asshole of a boyfriend. -__- seriously couldn't even care anymore."

"Just realized that absolutely noone loves me. They don't even really like me they are just being nice. =/ ohh well"

"Im done worrying about everyone else's problems."

"I am seriously missing my boyfriend right now. =( gahh i just wanna cuddle!"

"Just had an amazing day with my lovely boyfriend. =D"

"I have atelophobia. i am scared of not being good enough."

 

[Global Laziness]

'No shirt, no shoes, and I still get service.'

from a girl.

Not sure if that or the six people who liked it are worse.

That's a line from an LMFAO song.

[LieLowTheWantedMan]

I love how the girls who complain about not being able to find nice guys are the girls who seem to like guys for the fact they are assholes.

[ThroughHerEyesDude6]

I love how the girls who complain about not being able to find nice guys are the girls who seem to like guys for the fact they are assholes.

The only reason I act like an asshole is to attract those girls.

The cycle continues.

[Chino]

"Ugh so tired of this bullshit lately "
" Work till 430 "
" Forgetting the bullshit, with my bitch Miss Jodi "
" Work till 430 "
" Why won't u just let me be happy for once in my life "
"Work till 430 "
" Why do you do this to me "
" Work till 430"
" iLy kg ♥ "


Makes me want to puke. The girl's boyfriend doesn't even has a facebook. That means every post is a desperate plea for attention and to inform everyone that she is a victim.

That was on October 27th...

Emily xxxxx went from being "in a relationship" to "engaged."

LikeUnlike ·  · 12 hours ago.

 

... And we all found out yesterday at work that she's pregnant.

[blackngold29]

'No shirt, no shoes, and I still get service.'

from a girl.

Not sure if that or the six people who liked it are worse.

That's a line from an LMFAO song.

Oh, does that make it any better?

[Gadough]

Not pathetic, but it made me giggle.

[Chino]

One from my favorite FB friend. I think he thinks he's Kenny Powers.

"lettin niggas kno im back bitches!!!!! Matty Fucking Lodge!!!! working 12-8 then running somewhere to grab some parts for a certain sexy fox!!!"

[Super Dude]

My (female) cousin:
'One of these days I'll learn how the internet works and people will stop deriving pleasure from my misfortune.'

If she wasn't family, I'd be trolling the fuck outta her.

[Gadough]

That wouldn't stop me.

[Chino]

My (female) cousin:
'One of these days I'll learn how the internet works and people will stop deriving pleasure from my misfortune.'

If she wasn't family, I'd be trolling the fuck outta her.

Send her a link to this thread so she knows she's not the only one.

[chknptpie]

So this guy, Shorty, can not spell to save his life. He also has no grasp of grammar. I usually just ignore his posts, but this one was pretty awesome....

Shorty
hello everybody i would like to to say to the militray happy holiday an come home soon we all miss u... im very happy that i met militray people an made friends with the... i just want to say to all militray pepol thank u a god bless mery christmas to u guys an ladies u guy deserve the best come home safe....


        Justin R.  I just heard on the radio that the war is officially over. They are sending our troops home b4 the end of the year. All of them

        Allison  Perhaps you mean military...I hope santa brings you a dictionary.

[obscure]

Before you guys call me out... I'll give myself up....

my status now....

To every single one of you who are on my friends list - - I enjoy catching up, looking at pics, hearing about you and your family, sharing jokes and news, along with getting and sometimes giving support during good times and bad times too. I am not only glad to count you as my friends, but also as my family. As busy as we all are, let's see who takes the time to read this post all the way through. If you appreciate your family and friends around the world, go ahead and copy this as your status too - - even if it's for just a minute. I'll be watching to see who cherishes family and friendship just as I do. Thank you all so very much for being part of my life. Merry Christmas (via .......)

Merry Christmas 

[Orbert]

Merry Christmas, Nem!

I consider that a "mushy" status, which isn't really the same as a "pathetic" one.  One can make a lot of virtual friends over the Internet, many of whom become real friends, but to me the Internet is still one step removed from the real world and a little more cold and anonymous.  My very few exceptions, my Facebook friends are all people I've actually met in real life and consider friends.  I don't see anything wrong with reaffirming that, especially when it's so easy to forget.

[obscure]

  Orbert....
I've got nearly 12 hundred friends most of which I came real friends with over the years and got to meet in person but there are still loads of people that I don't actually know.... and there have been some douches I had to get rid of of course.... having a number friends come in handy when you promote bands, you know... it's one of the easiest ways to reach out to people about the upcoming gigs and stuff....... 

anyway.... Merry Merry Christmas!

[Chino]

"Happy Birthdayy to the best Dad in the world, mine ♥ love you soo much!"

This girl's dad doesn't even have a Facebook. I don't understand why people waste my newsfeed space with this shit.

[ehra]

Why would you even admit to being pissed at something as harmless and petty as that?

[Gadough]

Ehh, there's nothing wrong with that. It's kind of silly but it's heartwarming to see someone expressing love for their family.