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Author Topic: The pathetic facebook status thread.  (Read 305702 times)

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Offline Eff

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #560 on: December 02, 2009, 01:35:02 PM »
"is fucked. Crash, affair, abuse. FML. "
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Online Chino

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #561 on: December 03, 2009, 10:44:38 AM »
Just straight funny.

"You ever fart so loud it wakes you up? When it's you it's hilarious... When it's your girl it's the most disgusting thing in the world. You stinky ass to the couch! I want blueberries in my pancakes in the morning!!!!"
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Offline Orbert

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #562 on: December 03, 2009, 12:13:51 PM »
Whoa, I've never had that happen -- either to me or my wife/girlfriend -- and I'm okay with that.
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Online Chino

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #563 on: December 04, 2009, 08:42:33 AM »
After 17 pages, we finally have someone who admits it....

"Almost burnt my box macaroni and cheese..... I'm so pathetic "
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Offline Super Dude

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #564 on: December 04, 2009, 08:49:21 AM »
 :lol
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Quote from: bosk1
As frequently happens, Super Dude nailed it.
:superdude:

Offline PlaysLikeMyung

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #565 on: December 04, 2009, 09:30:44 AM »
Quote from: Chino on December 03, 2009, 10:44:38 AM
Just straight funny.

"You ever fart so loud it wakes you up? When it's you it's hilarious... When it's your girl it's the most disgusting thing in the world. You stinky ass to the couch! I want blueberries in my pancakes in the morning!!!!"

Steve Byrne :metal

That guy is hilarious
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Offline ehra

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #566 on: December 04, 2009, 10:18:12 AM »
Quote from: Chino on December 04, 2009, 08:42:33 AM
After 17 pages, we finally have someone who admits it....

"Almost burnt my box macaroni and cheese..... I'm so pathetic "

There was this ramen type thing I had once where you put water in it then microwave it, but I forgot to put the water in first. Had to air the house out for the rest of the day, lucky I didn't start a fire.  :lol
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Offline tri.ad

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #567 on: December 04, 2009, 02:24:02 PM »
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... And you ask me: "Where's my hairspray?"

Mentlegen.

Offline Orbert

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #568 on: December 04, 2009, 08:40:11 PM »
Quote from: ehra on December 04, 2009, 10:18:12 AM
There was this ramen type thing I had once where you put water in it then microwave it, but I forgot to put the water in first. Had to air the house out for the rest of the day, lucky I didn't start a fire.  :lol

Daughter of a friend of mine went to make instant oatmeal the other day, but forget to put the water in.  Dry oatmeal heated in a microwave gets hot enough to burst into flames, it turns out.  Didn't burn the kitchen or the house down, but the microwave took some fire damage.
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Offline Birch Boy

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #569 on: December 04, 2009, 08:41:58 PM »
Quote from: Orbert on December 04, 2009, 08:40:11 PM
Quote from: ehra on December 04, 2009, 10:18:12 AM
There was this ramen type thing I had once where you put water in it then microwave it, but I forgot to put the water in first. Had to air the house out for the rest of the day, lucky I didn't start a fire.  :lol

Daughter of a friend of mine went to make instant oatmeal the other day, but forget to put the water in.  Dry oatmeal heated in a microwave gets hot enough to burst into flames, it turns out.  Didn't burn the kitchen or the house down, but the microwave took some fire damage.
Same situation with my brother, except with Easy Mac  :facepalm:
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Offline Orbert

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #570 on: December 04, 2009, 09:06:36 PM »
Wow, you really have to suck at cooking to ruin Easy Mac.
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Offline Sir GuitarCozmo

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #571 on: December 06, 2009, 08:32:29 AM »
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Offline jasc15

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #572 on: December 09, 2009, 02:39:44 PM »
^^ That is wonderful.
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Offline Sigz

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #573 on: December 09, 2009, 03:23:12 PM »
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The world is a stage, but the play is badly cast.

Offline Birch Boy

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #574 on: December 09, 2009, 07:44:24 PM »
"Holy shit i shoveled my entire driveway jesus christ"
 :lol
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Online Chino

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #575 on: December 15, 2009, 11:15:10 AM »
"my strategy to get through my final presentation? push up bra, low cut shirt, and making my double D's work for me"

« Last Edit: December 15, 2009, 02:52:03 PM by Chino »
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Offline Orbert

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #576 on: December 15, 2009, 11:33:33 AM »
That's pathetic, but also awesome.  In a final presentation, you make it work for you, whatever it is you have.
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Offline Sigz

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #577 on: December 15, 2009, 01:23:47 PM »
" is taking suggestions for a new status. Post ideas below."
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Quote
The world is a stage, but the play is badly cast.

Offline lateralus88

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #578 on: December 15, 2009, 02:09:28 PM »
Quote from: Sigz on December 15, 2009, 01:23:47 PM
" is taking suggestions for a new status. Post ideas below."
lolattentionwhore
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I felt its length in quite a few places.

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Online Chino

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #579 on: December 15, 2009, 02:52:35 PM »
Quote from: Chino on December 15, 2009, 11:15:10 AM
"my strategy to get through my final presentation? push up bra, low cut shirt, and making my double D's work for me"



Her next one!

 :rollin :rollin

"dear mother, if you read my last status, don't worry, I was just kidding. I wore a tank top under the low cut shirt."
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Offline Orbert

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #580 on: December 15, 2009, 03:02:10 PM »
Wimp
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Online Chino

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #581 on: December 16, 2009, 06:43:09 PM »
"i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break."
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Offline MetalManiac666

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #582 on: December 16, 2009, 08:22:36 PM »
Are all of these from the same slut?
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Offline Jamesman42

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #583 on: December 16, 2009, 08:34:36 PM »
Quote from: Sigz on December 15, 2009, 01:23:47 PM
" is taking suggestions for a new status. Post ideas below."

Wow.
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Offline glaurung

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #584 on: December 17, 2009, 01:59:02 PM »
 :rollin


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Offline Sigz

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #585 on: December 17, 2009, 02:00:22 PM »
 :rollin :rollin :rollin
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Offline millahh

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #586 on: December 19, 2009, 09:24:57 PM »
Quote
I don't want hear happy holidays, or seasons greetings! If you can not wish me a "MERRY CHRISTMAS" then don't wish me anything at all! If you agree, and believe in Christ, copy and paste this as your status! MERRY CHRISTMAS from my house to yours!!! After all, JESUS is the reason for the season!!!!

 :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:...on so many levels.
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WHEN WILL YOU ADRESS MY MONKEY ARGUMENT???? NEVER???? THAT\' WHAT I FIGURED.:lol

Offline MetalManiac666

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #587 on: December 19, 2009, 09:37:02 PM »
Quote from: glaurung on December 17, 2009, 01:59:02 PM
*snip*

:rollin :rollin :rollin

Quote from: millahh on December 19, 2009, 09:24:57 PM
Quote
I don't want hear happy holidays, or seasons greetings! If you can not wish me a "MERRY CHRISTMAS" then don't wish me anything at all! If you agree, and believe in Christ, copy and paste this as your status! MERRY CHRISTMAS from my house to yours!!! After all, JESUS is the reason for the season!!!!

Damn, people can be so ignorant... :facepalm:
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Offline Super Dude

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #588 on: December 19, 2009, 10:06:40 PM »
Oh my God.... (pun intended :neverusethis:)
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Quote from: bosk1
As frequently happens, Super Dude nailed it.
:superdude:

Offline Sigz

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #589 on: December 19, 2009, 10:26:57 PM »
Quote from: millahh on December 19, 2009, 09:24:57 PM
Quote
I don't want hear happy holidays, or seasons greetings! If you can not wish me a "MERRY CHRISTMAS" then don't wish me anything at all! If you agree, and believe in Christ, copy and paste this as your status! MERRY CHRISTMAS from my house to yours!!! After all, JESUS is the reason for the season!!!!

 :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:...on so many levels.

Please comment happy holidays or happy Hanukkah on this status.
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Quote
The world is a stage, but the play is badly cast.

Offline Birch Boy

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #590 on: December 19, 2009, 11:03:51 PM »
"i wanna smoke a BLUNT"
 :facepalm:
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Offline Super Dude

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #591 on: December 19, 2009, 11:14:47 PM »
Quote from: Sigz on December 19, 2009, 10:26:57 PM
Quote from: millahh on December 19, 2009, 09:24:57 PM
Quote
I don't want hear happy holidays, or seasons greetings! If you can not wish me a "MERRY CHRISTMAS" then don't wish me anything at all! If you agree, and believe in Christ, copy and paste this as your status! MERRY CHRISTMAS from my house to yours!!! After all, JESUS is the reason for the season!!!!

 :facepalm: :facepalm: :facepalm:...on so many levels.

Please comment happy holidays or happy Hanukkah on this status.

This, though I think it'd be much better if a Jew were to do the latter.
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Quote from: bosk1
As frequently happens, Super Dude nailed it.
:superdude:

Offline Sigz

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #592 on: December 20, 2009, 06:53:02 PM »
Quote
...make sure u re-gift Jesus this CHRISTmas.

I said he was such a shitty gift last year he's not even worth re-gifting.
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The world is a stage, but the play is badly cast.

Offline MetalManiac666

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #593 on: December 20, 2009, 08:20:38 PM »
:lol
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Offline sonatafanica

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Re: The pathetic facebook status thread.
« Reply #594 on: December 21, 2009, 12:44:25 PM »
"ignorance is bliss..."

first reply:

"until you find out what bliss is!"



I lol'd
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