Unintentionally funny lyrics

[The Curious Orange]

"Dawn of light lying between a silence and sold sources,
 Chased amid fusions of wonder, in moments hardly seen forgotten
 Coloured in pastures of chance dancing leaves cast spells of challenge,
 Amused but real in thought, we fled from the sea whole.
 Dawn of thought transferred through moments of days undersearching every feeling
 Corridors of time provoking memories, disjointed but with purpose,
Craving penetrations offer links with the self instructor's sharp
 and tender love as we took to the air, a picture of distance.
 Dawn of our power we amuse redescending as fast as misused
 Expression, as only to teach love as to reveal passion chasing
 Late into corners, and we danced from the ocean.
 Dawn of love sent within us colours of awakening among the many
 Wont to follow, only tunes of a different age, as the links span
 Our endless caresses for the freedom of life everlasting..."

Cracks me up everytime. Hilariously bad.

[Cruithne]

"I will search for the emerald sword" (Rhaposdy). Only funny when you realise he's pronouncing it "eem-rald".

Similary "rise of the pageant" (Pagan's Mind). First time I'd ever heard someone manage to get three syllables out of pageant.

[MirrorMask]

"I will search for the emerald sword" (Rhaposdy). Only funny when you realise he's pronouncing it "eem-rald".

There's also a "through virgin skies" with "virgin" pronounced exactly like you'd expect an italian to pronounce it, almost literally and without that modulation on the "i" that makes it almost an "o" 

If I remember correctly in later albums he pronounced Emerald correctly.

Also, in Lamento Eroico which is sung in italian there's a word that's pronounced in a funny way, you'd think he'd get his own language right... I remember Fabio Lione explaining that he did several takes and the one that Sasha Paeth ended up picking was the one with the involuntary mispronunciation, which Sasha of course not being italian could not grasp.

[Stadler]

"Dawn of light lying between a silence and sold sources,
 Chased amid fusions of wonder, in moments hardly seen forgotten
 Coloured in pastures of chance dancing leaves cast spells of challenge,
 Amused but real in thought, we fled from the sea whole.
 Dawn of thought transferred through moments of days undersearching every feeling
 Corridors of time provoking memories, disjointed but with purpose,
Craving penetrations offer links with the self instructor's sharp
 and tender love as we took to the air, a picture of distance.
 Dawn of our power we amuse redescending as fast as misused
 Expression, as only to teach love as to reveal passion chasing
 Late into corners, and we danced from the ocean.
 Dawn of love sent within us colours of awakening among the many
 Wont to follow, only tunes of a different age, as the links span
 Our endless caresses for the freedom of life everlasting..."

Cracks me up everytime. Hilariously bad.

Not saying this to be contrarian, but this is one of my favorite lyrics of all time.   Seriously.   

Now, if you had posted:
I could not take it oh so seriously really
When you called and said you'd seen a UFO
But then it dawned on me the message in writing
Spelt out a meeting never dreamed of before

Or:
Shirley gets to help her with the child though she's strung out on crack time
Shirley never knew what it was to be held in real love

Not related to Jon Anderson or Yes, but the lyrics to Rainbow's "Black Sheep Of The Family" (a cover, by the way) are cringe-inducing as well.

[pg1067]

"Dawn of light lying between a silence and sold sources,
 Chased amid fusions of wonder, in moments hardly seen forgotten
 Coloured in pastures of chance dancing leaves cast spells of challenge,
 Amused but real in thought, we fled from the sea whole.
 Dawn of thought transferred through moments of days undersearching every feeling
 Corridors of time provoking memories, disjointed but with purpose,
Craving penetrations offer links with the self instructor's sharp
 and tender love as we took to the air, a picture of distance.
 Dawn of our power we amuse redescending as fast as misused
 Expression, as only to teach love as to reveal passion chasing
 Late into corners, and we danced from the ocean.
 Dawn of love sent within us colours of awakening among the many
 Wont to follow, only tunes of a different age, as the links span
 Our endless caresses for the freedom of life everlasting..."

Cracks me up everytime. Hilariously bad.

Not saying this to be contrarian, but this is one of my favorite lyrics of all time.   Seriously.

Yeah...I wouldn't go quite as far as Stadler, but I really dig the intro lyrics of TRSOG (although I will admit that I had a really hard time with that intro the first couple times I listened to the song.

[Stadler]

I love the cadence of it, and the way it goes in to the musical part.  It's very powerful and moving for me without being overtly heavy. 

[Lowdz]

This classic from scary metal band Black Sabbath


Misty morning, clouds in the sky
Without warning, the wizard walks by
Casting his shadow, weaving his spell
Funny clothes, tinkling bell

 

[pg1067]

I love the cadence of it, and the way it goes in to the musical part.  It's very powerful and moving for me without being overtly heavy.

For sure.  I came around, but it was a bit of a WTF?! the first time I heard it.

[bosk1]

This classic from scary metal band Black Sabbath


Misty morning, clouds in the sky
Without warning, the wizard walks by
Casting his shadow, weaving his spell
Funny clothes, tinkling bell

 

  How is that "unintentionally funny?"  He's talking about shamanistic superstition, and the lyrics are pretty on point for that.

[Stadler]

This classic from scary metal band Black Sabbath


Misty morning, clouds in the sky
Without warning, the wizard walks by
Casting his shadow, weaving his spell
Funny clothes, tinkling bell

 

My fav WTF moment from Sabbath (though admittedly I love the song and have grown to really like the lyrics):

Goin' home late last night,
Suddenly I got a fright
Yeah, I looked through a window and surprise what I saw
Fairy boots are dancin' with a dwarf
All right now

[Lowdz]

This classic from scary metal band Black Sabbath


Misty morning, clouds in the sky
Without warning, the wizard walks by
Casting his shadow, weaving his spell
Funny clothes, tinkling bell

 

  How is that "unintentionally funny?"  He's talking about shamanistic superstition, and the lyrics are pretty on point for that.

Have you read it? On point or not, it hilarious. In a metal song it’s even funnier.

[LCArenas]

I'm somewhat glad we have moved on from a defunct inner meme, but still: Motherfuckin' psychosane

[The Walrus]

I'm somewhat glad we have moved on from a defunct inner meme, but still: Motherfuckin' psychosane

"I heard you took one in the face"

[jammindude]

"Dawn of light lying between a silence and sold sources,
 Chased amid fusions of wonder, in moments hardly seen forgotten
 Coloured in pastures of chance dancing leaves cast spells of challenge,
 Amused but real in thought, we fled from the sea whole.
 Dawn of thought transferred through moments of days undersearching every feeling
 Corridors of time provoking memories, disjointed but with purpose,
Craving penetrations offer links with the self instructor's sharp
 and tender love as we took to the air, a picture of distance.
 Dawn of our power we amuse redescending as fast as misused
 Expression, as only to teach love as to reveal passion chasing
 Late into corners, and we danced from the ocean.
 Dawn of love sent within us colours of awakening among the many
 Wont to follow, only tunes of a different age, as the links span
 Our endless caresses for the freedom of life everlasting..."

Cracks me up everytime. Hilariously bad.

Count me in as another one who LOVES the lyrics and this intro.   Also, I prefer the longer intro with Howe's guitar set up before the vocals kick it.   To me, it just adds to the build up that is already goosebump inducing. 

Now, if you want hilariously bad:

"The Gods made heavy metal
And they saw that it was good
They said to play it louder than hell
We promised that we would"   

The Gods Made Heavy Metal by Manowar

In fact, Manowar should really dominate this entire thread.   Although the question of whether it's "unintentional" might be raised.

[The Walrus]

The Rhapsody ones are good for that too:

"Fuck you bloody bastard, and your shitty sons"
"Godforsaken bitch! Your fucking army of terror will never be so powerful!"
"IT'S AN AVALAAAAAAAANCHE"

[MirrorMask]

In fact, Manowar should really dominate this entire thread.   Although the question of whether it's "unintentional" might be raised.

I believe for Manowar they're all serious lyrics. So they're all unintentionally funny. There are other bands where you know they do realize they're cheesy, for example the aptly named "Brothers of Metal" band, a multi-vocalists swedish version of Manowar, have a song that goes "Loki is my brother, he has no sex appeal" and I'm pretty sure they know it's silly, but Manowar are dead serious 

And hey, since it's a biblical quote adapted to the music, I think the line itself "the gods made heavy metal, and then they saw that it was good" is kinda badass 

[pg1067]

"Romeo loved his Juliet
Their parents told them 'Stop'
Then it all turned out peculiar
He couldn't get it up"

Helloween - "Rise and Fall"

[Stadler]

I'm somewhat glad we have moved on from a defunct inner meme, but still: Motherfuckin' psychosane

"I heard you took one in the face"

Hey.  Easy. That's legendary. 

[Stadler]

"Dawn of light lying between a silence and sold sources,
 Chased amid fusions of wonder, in moments hardly seen forgotten
 Coloured in pastures of chance dancing leaves cast spells of challenge,
 Amused but real in thought, we fled from the sea whole.
 Dawn of thought transferred through moments of days undersearching every feeling
 Corridors of time provoking memories, disjointed but with purpose,
Craving penetrations offer links with the self instructor's sharp
 and tender love as we took to the air, a picture of distance.
 Dawn of our power we amuse redescending as fast as misused
 Expression, as only to teach love as to reveal passion chasing
 Late into corners, and we danced from the ocean.
 Dawn of love sent within us colours of awakening among the many
 Wont to follow, only tunes of a different age, as the links span
 Our endless caresses for the freedom of life everlasting..."

Cracks me up everytime. Hilariously bad.

Count me in as another one who LOVES the lyrics and this intro.   Also, I prefer the longer intro with Howe's guitar set up before the vocals kick it.   To me, it just adds to the build up that is already goosebump inducing. 

Now, if you want hilariously bad:

"The Gods made heavy metal
And they saw that it was good
They said to play it louder than hell
We promised that we would"   

The Gods Made Heavy Metal by Manowar

In fact, Manowar should really dominate this entire thread.   Although the question of whether it's "unintentional" might be raised.

What version is that, may I ask?  I know there are a couple rehearsal/early mix versions floating around out there, but I haven't heard all of them.   I'd like to, though... 

[jammindude]

I believe the original tapes had the extended intro...but it was chopped for time constraints on release.

The Steven Wilson remaster has the full version as a bonus track. I personally think it’s a huge improvement.

https://youtu.be/2-tnnbwIYys

[Stadler]

I cannot for the LIFE of me think why I forgot about this gem:

Man battle stations torpedo, man battle stations torpedo
I thought I'd go out and take a swim today
It was real hot and I just had to get away
They spotted an unknown sub down in the bay
But I don't care, think I'll go swimmin' anyway - yeah
Let's take a dive, torpedo girl, and feel alive, torpedo girl
Let's take a dive, torpedo girl, and feel alive
But I knew when I was in the suds and swimmin' around
But then all of a sudden I heard this rumblin' sound
I saw this thing that looked a lot like a submarine
With a pretty girl on the bridge, could this be a dream?
I don't know, could be
Let's take a dive, torpedo girl, and feel alive, torpedo girl
Let's take a dive, torpedo girl, and feel alive
Come on, get your feet wet
Torpedo girl, let's take a dive, torpedo girl, and feel alive

I actually like the song, but you can't really think too hard about the words he's singing.

[Lowdz]

Love Torpedo Girl, but yes 😀. Ace is no Shakespeare

[The Walrus]

Drop Dead Legs is on again. I can confirm I still find "GIANT BUTT!" to be the funniest thing in this thread.