Describe the Dream Theater albums using wife/relationship analogies

Perpetual Change · August 25, 2011, 12:19:16 AM

I originally posted this in the "If DT albums were women thread," but I noticed it was kinda off topic and against the topic's main format anyway, and I think it might be a fun idea to see how people would describe different DT albums using the relationship analogy, which really has been so near and dear to us this past year

Here's my go:

When Dream and Day Unite- The tomboyish theater-tech girl who actually wasn't too bad, and even put out, only you had to get passed the atrocious amounts of hair on her arms... and her back.

Images and Words- Your first love. She was quirky, but in a beautiful way. She made you feel good about yourself and the world. She moved away when you were a teenager, but you still remember her fondly.

Awake- The girl that broke your heart and then tore it into a million peaces. This is a fairly obvious one. You and your thoughts about love were never the same after her.

A Change of Seasons- A quick rebound you had after Awake. She was really cool at first, but then as the relationship progressed you realized that she was just pretending to be someone she wasn't

Falling into Infinity- A charming girl you dated who really had her stuff together, and knew where she was going with her life. Your friends didn't like her, though, and you're weren't sure whether she actually liked you or just the idea of you, so you unceremoniously dumped her and moved on.

Scenes from a Memory- This girl was a lot like your first love, Images and Words, in many ways. When you met her, it was the first time you had felt that way about a womang in a long time. But guess what? You know your brother? Yeah, he fucked her.

Six Degrees of Inner Turbulence- This girl had issues. I mean, deep-seeded psychological issues. You had a lot of good times together, laughing, kissing, crying together... and crying together again. You where with her for awhile, but eventually you got tired of being her psychologist and moved on. She was your longest relationship to date.

Train of Thought- She was definitely an impulsive creature. She may have been an alcoholic with a bad attitude and severe daddy issues, but she liked to have sex alot. So much that, while it was cool at first, even you got tired of it. Ironically, her tendency to stumble out of her alcoholic stupor onto a high-horse about religion is what pushed you away.

Octavarium- A beautiful, yet frustrating girl. See "50 First Dates," staring Adam Sandler.

Systematic Chaos- The nerdy girlfriend you've always dreamed of. She plays videogames with you, buys you comics, is into Science Fiction and anime, and totally "gets" your online habits. And, oh yeah, she really likes whips and leathers, and wants to put your balls in a vice. Enjoy!

Black Clouds & Silver Linings- You liked this person alot, but unfortunately they weren't a womang. Black Clouds was a man. A bearded gentleman, if it suits you.

A Dramatic Turn of Events- You've been single for awhile now, but good news is on the way. Remember that girl Images? Well, word on the street is she's moving back in town. You haven't seen her in like 15 years, but you Skyped with her last week and on the surface it seems like she's just as beautiful of a person as ever, and still pretty darned attractive too. Oh yeah, and she's also still single

Phew!

Sorry, I kinda stopped being able to think of good ones after awhile

Adami · August 25, 2011, 12:28:11 AM

Only problem is you attached what sounds like my fantasy girl to my least favorite DT album.

But very creative.

robwebster · August 25, 2011, 12:39:41 AM

Quote from: Adami on August 25, 2011, 12:28:11 AM
Only problem is you attached what sounds like my fantasy girl to my least favorite DT album.

What, When Dream and Day Unite?

Adami · August 25, 2011, 12:41:06 AM

Quote from: robwebster on August 25, 2011, 12:39:41 AM
Quote from: Adami on August 25, 2011, 12:28:11 AM
Only problem is you attached what sounds like my fantasy girl to my least favorite DT album.
What, When Dream and Day Unite?

Yes, hairy arms and backs just get me so aroused.

No, Systematic Chaos. Minus the whole balls in a vice bit, but I'm sure I could rid her of that tendency.

jsem · August 25, 2011, 03:56:17 AM

Quote from: Adami on August 25, 2011, 12:28:11 AM
Only problem is you attached what sounds like my fantasy girl to my least favorite DT album.

But very creative.

Exactly this.

Jirpo · August 25, 2011, 04:55:05 AM

I burst out laughing at BC&SL, well done

Anyway, Images and Words is pretty much what you said but she never moved away

ACOS is the goddess who is way too good for you.

Speed69pt · August 25, 2011, 05:17:21 AM

Hello There,

Member since a while, but always a "reader", so, since I think I have a great story on this matter, this is my first post:

Although ADTOE hasn't been released yet, I think this is the one that better describes my relationship with the women I lived, because: On the 17th July I went to watch the Porto concert, and when I got home she left only to find a letter saying why she left on top of my dinner table, hence A dramatic turn of events since I was very happy with the concert and coming home and be completely shocked with the dramatic turn of events...

So here is my first and sad post.

Best wishes for all,

Speed69pt

alirocker08 · August 25, 2011, 05:40:33 AM

I sound like a combination of TOT and SDOIT.

Oh shit.

obscure · August 25, 2011, 05:49:50 AM

The OP is awesome

sorry to hear that Speed69pt ... but don't worry... maybe you'll find another one who'll come to the concert and cheer with you instead....

Cruithne · August 25, 2011, 07:42:50 AM

Systematic Chaos - the headfuck/damaged goods girl. She has deep rooted psychological issues from being forsaken by her parents as a child, leaving her as a little lost soul who always feels like she's in the presence of enemies. Life with her is always exciting since she's always in constant motion but when she's in a bad mood nights can seem to last an eternity. Still, the repentance she shows after throwing a wobbler can lead to great make up sex.

Also has a long term laryngitis issue from sucking too much!

aXygnus · August 25, 2011, 07:49:40 AM

Quote from: Cruithne on August 25, 2011, 07:42:50 AM
Systematic Chaos - the headfuck/damaged goods girl. She has deep rooted psychological issues from being forsaken by her parents as a child, leaving her as a little lost soul who always feels like she's in the presence of enemies. Life with her is always exciting since she's always in constant motion but when she's in a bad mood nights can seem to last an eternity. Still, the repentance she shows after throwing a wobbler can lead to great make up sex.

Also has a long term laryngitis issue from sucking too much!

Cheesy, but effective. I laughed hard.

Speed69pt · August 25, 2011, 08:53:09 AM

Quote from: obscure on August 25, 2011, 05:49:50 AM
The OP is awesome

sorry to hear that Speed69pt ... but don't worry... maybe you'll find another one who'll come to the concert and cheer with you instead....

Thanks,

No worry.

She was going to the concert but was sick that weekend and she was so jealous that she couldn't stand that I went, leaving her alone at home, go figure some women, if anyone would quit going to a DT gig just becaus someone was ill. would you guys? I can only watch them once every 2 years...

obscure · August 25, 2011, 11:15:33 AM

I had that kind of relationships in the past... where I was jealous of the fun they had and vice versa... but not now... my hubby gets lazy when it comes to recreational activities... he prefers to stay at home, play computer games, watch TV show, even watch the walls for that matter ..lol...
I, on the other hand, see 5 gigs a month on average.... he doesn't mind.... even when he is ill, he pretends to feel well and sends me to the concert....
and if it's DT we're talking about, he would do anything to make that happen... he knows how his wife is dying for these guys....
and at some point you learn from your partner... now I wouldn't mind either if he goes to a gig when I'm ill...

so again... I kind of feel that what has happened to you has happened for the better....

Speed69pt · August 25, 2011, 05:58:51 PM

Quote from: obscure on August 25, 2011, 11:15:33 AM
I had that kind of relationships in the past... where I was jealous of the fun they had and vice versa... but not now... my hubby gets lazy when it comes to recreational activities... he prefers to stay at home, play computer games, watch TV show, even watch the walls for that matter ..lol...
I, on the other hand, see 5 gigs a month on average.... he doesn't mind.... even when he is ill, he pretends to feel well and sends me to the concert....
and if it's DT we're talking about, he would do anything to make that happen... he knows how his wife is dying for these guys....
and at some point you learn from your partner... now I wouldn't mind either if he goes to a gig when I'm ill...

so again... I kind of feel that what has happened to you has happened for the better....

Thanks again for your words. And you are spot on, I am having a lot more fun these days, always a silver lining...

senecadawg2 · August 25, 2011, 06:08:48 PM

Quote from: alirocker08 on August 25, 2011, 05:40:33 AM
I sound like a combination of TOT and SDOIT.

Oh shit.

I find that to be attractive

Vajra · August 25, 2011, 06:18:20 PM

This thread has inspired me to name my future daughter "Images & Words"

senecadawg2 · August 25, 2011, 06:23:39 PM

ACOS was actually an angel and SC was actually... Mike Portnoy

Aniland · August 25, 2011, 06:23:50 PM

Jamesman42 · August 25, 2011, 06:31:51 PM

SC is like a dirty whore you did it with just to remember what a vagina feels like, and BC&SL is more like your best friend's mom that has pity sex with you when you cry in her arms about what you did with SC and how you think you'll never love a woman again.

ResultsMayVary · August 25, 2011, 06:32:40 PM

Please, no.

I've read enough of these analogies in these last few months to cover a lifetime.

Perpetual Change · August 25, 2011, 06:42:41 PM

Quote from: Jamesman42 on August 25, 2011, 06:31:51 PM
SC is like a dirty whore you did it with just to remember what a vagina feels like, and BC&SL is more like your best friend's mom that has pity sex with you when you cry in her arms about what you did with SC and how you think you'll never love a woman again.

lol!

I demand a full list from you NOW.

Jamesman42 · August 25, 2011, 07:16:49 PM

I'll try...

WDADU is like fantasizing about having sex with your mother. Fuck that. Wait, don't. Let's not go there.

Anywho, IaW is that girl you see on TV. You're like 14 and she's maybe 13? Who knows...all that matters is that she has that perfect face and is cute, and you can tell she is gonna be smokin' when you both get older.

Speaking of smokin', Awake is like that girl down the road a few years older than you. She wears a lot of black and her voice is a little deeper because she smokes pot all the time. I mean, ALL THE TIME. She couldn't bring down an airplane if she crashed it. But you have good times with her. Fuck that whore!

Falling Into Infinity is that girl who you meet at the end of high school, and you had always seen here around school, knew her name but never got a chance to know her. She was always the plain Jane of the school, but at this point you notice that she is attractive. You fool around with her a few times before discovering some unrelenting warts on her inner thighs. No amount of vagina soap will take care of that.

Anyway, summer before college and this crazy redhead comes to you with a personality as fiery as her head. She rocks your world. Sex with her is like hugging a unicorn's tail to get it to like you in some way so it thinks you look half-decent naked. But this time, the metaphorical unicorn loves it when you put the icing on her cakeface (forgive me).

College is starting. Life is good, you're not a virgin, in fact, you feel like you could go forever with a girl in bed. So you meet a sly brunette and guess what, 3 days later you're in an empty Chemistry class and you guys are going and going and going, giving her those six inches of inner turbulence. I mean, this is like the Dream Theater album Six Degrees of inner Turbulence. Why should something like this be so secret and so good? Of course, the Chem professor has to walk in and see your

ass and balls. Right, he has ruined whatever TRAIN OF THOUGHT LOL you had while riding her. Such a different scenario now with an extra character. You, the brunette, and the Chem professor. So to be so totally different, you tell the brunette to kick it to the curb and bend over the manly Chem professor. He takes you as you are.

At this point you feel dirty. But life goes on and now you have your A.A. degree. You start taking Bachelor level classes and you think you have all this awesome knowledge and you're top shit. So much so that you squeeze your man donut Octavariumally. Meaning, fuck women...this story ends where it began, and these hormones started with a worn out '99 Playboy and a curious hand to puberty's doing. But as a man, you found it's all caught up to you, and everything has changed. feels good man.

Anyway, you graduate and get addicted to heavy drugs. the kind that make cocaine look like baby powder being given to a baby. So I told you about SC and BCSL

Quote from: Jamesman42 on August 25, 2011, 06:31:51 PM
SC is like a dirty whore you did it with just to remember what a vagina feels like, and BC&SL is more like your best friend's mom that has pity sex with you when you cry in her arms about what you did with SC and how you think you'll never love a woman again.

And ADTOE is the woman of your dreams coming to you. She might have had some herpes in the past, but she says they haven't popped up in a while, maybe like a year or so. She wants you bad. You feel the pressure and start taking your clothes off. She softly whispers in your ear "Forsaken."

Perpetual Change · August 25, 2011, 07:27:17 PM

Oh my god. lol.

Jamesman42 · August 25, 2011, 07:28:41 PM

oh, and tell them about my comment, tell them about me, the james of tuscany

DJay32 · August 25, 2011, 10:09:05 PM

I'd just like to say that the OP greatly represents what I think of Systematic Chaos in every goddamn way. >W>

And the James of Tuscany's description of Metropolis, pt. 2 greatly represents how unappealing the album is to me. He may have also killed Six Degrees for me. GIVE ME THE OP'S SYSTEMATIC CHAOS PLEASE.

obscure · August 26, 2011, 12:28:57 AM

Quote from: Jamesman42 on August 25, 2011, 07:16:49 PM
I'll try...

WDADU is like fantasizing about having sex with your mother. Fuck that. Wait, don't. Let's not go there.

Anywho, IaW is that girl you see on TV. You're like 14 and she's maybe 13? Who knows...all that matters is that she has that perfect face and is cute, and you can tell she is gonna be smokin' when you both get older.

Speaking of smokin', Awake is like that girl down the road a few years older than you. She wears a lot of black and her voice is a little deeper because she smokes pot all the time. I mean, ALL THE TIME. She couldn't bring down an airplane if she crashed it. But you have good times with her. Fuck that whore!

Falling Into Infinity is that girl who you meet at the end of high school, and you had always seen here around school, knew her name but never got a chance to know her. She was always the plain Jane of the school, but at this point you notice that she is attractive. You fool around with her a few times before discovering some unrelenting warts on her inner thighs. No amount of vagina soap will take care of that.

Anyway, summer before college and this crazy redhead comes to you with a personality as fiery as her head. She rocks your world. Sex with her is like hugging a unicorn's tail to get it to like you in some way so it thinks you look half-decent naked. But this time, the metaphorical unicorn loves it when you put the icing on her cakeface (forgive me).

College is starting. Life is good, you're not a virgin, in fact, you feel like you could go forever with a girl in bed. So you meet a sly brunette and guess what, 3 days later you're in an empty Chemistry class and you guys are going and going and going, giving her those six inches of inner turbulence. I mean, this is like the Dream Theater album Six Degrees of inner Turbulence. Why should something like this be so secret and so good? Of course, the Chem professor has to walk in and see your

ass and balls. Right, he has ruined whatever TRAIN OF THOUGHT LOL you had while riding her. Such a different scenario now with an extra character. You, the brunette, and the Chem professor. So to be so totally different, you tell the brunette to kick it to the curb and bend over the manly Chem professor. He takes you as you are.

At this point you feel dirty. But life goes on and now you have your A.A. degree. You start taking Bachelor level classes and you think you have all this awesome knowledge and you're top shit. So much so that you squeeze your man donut Octavariumally. Meaning, fuck women...this story ends where it began, and these hormones started with a worn out '99 Playboy and a curious hand to puberty's doing. But as a man, you found it's all caught up to you, and everything has changed. feels good man.

Anyway, you graduate and get addicted to heavy drugs. the kind that make cocaine look like baby powder being given to a baby. So I told you about SC and BCSL

Quote from: Jamesman42 on August 25, 2011, 06:31:51 PM
SC is like a dirty whore you did it with just to remember what a vagina feels like, and BC&SL is more like your best friend's mom that has pity sex with you when you cry in her arms about what you did with SC and how you think you'll never love a woman again.

And ADTOE is the woman of your dreams coming to you. She might have had some herpes in the past, but she says they haven't popped up in a while, maybe like a year or so. She wants you bad. You feel the pressure and start taking your clothes off. She softly whispers in your ear "Forsaken."

Quote(forgive me)

that's sweet

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Describe the Dream Theater albums using wife/relationship analogies