Going to concerts with bands that aren’t your cup of tea

[T-ski]

So me and the Mrs. got our soon to be 15 year old tix to an AJR concert for his birthday. All I know of this band is the song “Bang” and it’s not really the type of music I’d listen to.

I’m sure we’ve all sacrificed our pride to appease a loved one, hell my wife went to a Dream Theater concert with me, just curious as to what kind of experiences any of you have had in this scenario.

[Buddyhunter1]

My friend and I have a good amount of overlap in musical tastes and we've been to tons of concerts together that we've both enjoyed. That said, there's been a few bands where only one of us was a fan and the other was dragged along anyways, then proceeded to not have the best time.

For me: Phish. Several times. Fun for a bit, but mind-numbingly boring after a while, and those shows were looooooong.
For him: Meshuggah. Understandably not for everyone!

[Anguyen92]

I've seen bands like Zac Brown Band, Lindsey Stirling, Brad Paisley, Michael Buble, and other bands that's different from what I normally listen that's in my alley.  And let me say, I had a fun time with in those concerts.  Then again, I've always had a fun time going to concerts.  The only exception was Lynyrd Skynyrd.  That was basically the only concert I have ever been to where I just walked out in the middle of their set.

The key here is try to do as much as a deep dive into the bands as much as you can, or go to setlist.fm to see what they have been playing and try to keep a feel for their sound and vibe and hope it's something you like.

[pg1067]

First, your situation sounds exactly like me a few years ago.  I took my daughter to see Panic at the Disco.  One of their songs is on one of the Rock Band video games we have, but I had never otherwise heard anything by them (although, as she explained, it's really "him" because the only real "member" of the band is the lead singer/pianist).  I was pleasantly surprised.  The 4-piece band was tight, and it really felt like everything was real, and the singer gave one of the best live vocal performances I can remember.  I didn't run out and buy a bunch of albums, but I was extremely impressed.

Other than that, my experience in this area goes back 20+ years ago.  When my now-wife first moved to CA in early 1994, we did EVERYTHING together.  She feigned enjoying Dream Theater and Rush and Yes and went to the concerts with me.  She's always been less of a music fan than I, so she rarely had concerts that she wanted to attend.  The only one I recall was Tori Amos.  She was really into Little Earthquakes and Under the Pink, but I couldn't stand her.  Nevertheless, we went to a concert with another couple, both of whom liked Amos.  Didn't help that I had a big time headache, but it was one of the most miserable evenings of my life.  We eventually decided that it was dumb to drag each other to shows we didn't like (she copped to "hating" DT and Yes), so she and I haven't been to a concert together since...I think...Motley Crue in 2005.

[Stadler]

I go to shows all the time that aren't my cup of tea.  I've seen Miley Cyrus/Hannah Montana, I've seen the Jonas Brothers twice (the second time was actually kind of good), I've seen Harry Styles (LOVED it).  I used to work at the Hartford Civic Center, so I saw the Dead when I still hated them, I saw Janet Jackson, Barry Manilow, Cher, Tom Petty (not a fan).  My wife loves country, so I've seen the dude for Sugarland (he sucked), Jake Evans (ok), and I've seen Luke Bryan twice (that man can SING), Keith Urban four times (that man can PLAY) and Brett Eldredge three times (always a fun show), plus all the acts that served as openers for them (some overlap; Eldredge opened one of the Urban shows and one of the Bryan shows). 

Back in the day, I saw Tori Amos with my girlfriend at the time; I didn't care for the studio work, but she blew me away live and I became a fan.  REALLY good.

I love live music, so I'll go see anyone any time if the opportunity presents.  I won't buy tickets myself unless I like them, but if someone offers, I'm in.  No such think as a boring night at a concert, IMO.

[El Barto]

The key here is try to do as much as a deep dive into the bands as much as you can, or go to setlist.fm to see what they have been playing and try to keep a feel for their sound and vibe and hope it's something you like.

I was going to suggest drugs and alcohol, lots of them, but I think this is a better recommendation. I have no idea who they are, but if you listen through their setlist once or twice it's almost guaranteed you'll hear a song or two which, though you might not necessarily like, you'll find something to appreciate in. They seem to be playing decent sized venues, and while their music may (or may not) be crap, some amount of talent is usually required to get that sort of tour support.

[ProfessorPeart]

I had to go with my wife to see Kane Brown earlier this year. I hated it. I bought her tix for her birthday and all her friends bailed on her and she didn't want to go alone. Other than that, I've been lucky in not seeing stuff I'm not interested in.

[SwedishGoose]

As my kids have become older I have had to follow them to some concerts.

Shawn Mendez - Wonderful arena show with everyone given a wristband with ledlights... not my music but still enjoyable

Melanie Martinez - Conceptalbum with a thought through scene show... even a harpplayer on the scene... couldn't see almost anything though as everyone was filming with their mobile.... everyone except me and my daughter

Mitski - Quite enjoyed it... nice scene prescence

Will be seeing Mother Mother in december

There will probably be more coming up..... luckily my son has seen the light of day and has been with me to for example Dream Theater and A.C.T

[Anguyen92]

I had to go with my wife to see Kane Brown earlier this year. I hated it. I bought her tix for her birthday and all her friends bailed on her and she didn't want to go alone. Other than that, I've been lucky in not seeing stuff I'm not interested in.

I only know that name because he was the reason why the Tampa Bay Lightning and the Florida Panthers had to play a back to back in their playoff series since Kane Brown was playing in Tampa on a day that they could have scheduled the hockey game.

Funnily enough, in contrast, when it turned out that the LA Kings was going to the playoffs, Kevin Hart rescheduled a show of his in the building formerly known as Staples Center (around the same period) so that the Kings didn't need to play a back to back.

[Cool Chris]

I barely like going to concerts for bands I enjoy, so going to one for one I don't would be a drag. I'm basically the opposite of Stadler on this one. My free time is finite, and I often don't have enough of it to do the things I want to do. I don't like spending it on things I don't. Fortunately my wife isn't a music lover and concerts were never her thing, and my elder daughter isn't quite old enough for it to be a thing yet.

[SoundscapeMN]

I've been to a long list of concerts where they were my girlfriend's/fiancee's/wife's band/artist. However, I've more or less enjoyed every one of them and become a fan, even though not huge.

The Monkees/Michael Nesmith/Micky Dolenz (12)
Mayer Hawthorne/Tuxedo (6)
Josh Rouse (6)
The Bird & the Bee (2)
Fitz & the Tantrums (2). Once with Nicole Atkins, Once with Capital Cities. I like both.
Capital Cities (1)
Chromeo (1)
Duran Duran/Chic (1)
Fountains of Wayne (1)
Hall & Oates/Tears for Fears (1)
Chris Isaak (1)
Sloan (1)

Also Music Documentaries:
Joan Jett, The Go Go's, Whitney Houston (2), Sharon Jones, Laurel Canyon, Sheryl Crow, Rick James, Summer of Soul, Amy Winehouse, Janet Jackson, Michael Jackson, George Michael (2), Hall & Oates

My wife has gone to:
-Marillion twice. Kind of hated both nights.
-The Dear Hunter. She went more or less because she liked the opener Chris Koza's band Rogue Valley
-The Velvet Teen/Minus the Bear. She laughed at people "trying to dance."
-Kimbra twice. She likes her, but not like I do.
-Ours. She went to this show partially in my support as I was dealing with a terrible bad back at the time,
-Alan Parson's Project. she likes "Games People Play" and a couple of other tunes.

[cfmoran13]

I go through this almost yearly when I see the Dave Matthews Band with my wife.  They're all fantastic musicians.  And, I can appreciate that aspect.  However, his voice is like nails on chalkboard for me.  And, a lot of the fans at the shows are really annoying.  I get that they're all just super enthusiastic about DMB.  I just don't care for the whole jam band vibe.  Two acts on my wife's bucket list for which I just can't pull the trigger are U2 and Bruce Springsteen.  Not a big fan of their music.  Certainly not a fan of their ticket costs.  I don't know if I could sit through 2-3 hours of either one.

[T-ski]

So me and the Mrs. got our soon to be 15 year old tix to an AJR concert for his birthday. All I know of this band is the song “Bang” and it’s not really the type of music I’d listen to.

I’m sure we’ve all sacrificed our pride to appease a loved one, hell my wife went to a Dream Theater concert with me, just curious as to what kind of experiences any of you have had in this scenario.

Saturday night we saw AJR and I enjoyed most of the show.

The opening act was some TikTok guy named BoyWithUke. He was awful. Very little of the crowd gave him much attention, although he tried to banter a bit it just wasn’t happening.

When AJR hit the stage the crowd popped big time and my son was in awe. The music seemed mostly live and the guys had very good energy. After about an hour the songs all started to sound the same to me,  three minutes with a subtle verse to a bombastic singalong chorus. Nothing really wowed me, but this music is targeted to the mostly 25 and under group, so…..

When the show ended our son was beaming. He said to my wife and I that this was the best experience of his life, so I guess we did good. 

[The Curious Orange]

Two acts on my wife's bucket list for which I just can't pull the trigger are U2 and Bruce Springsteen.  Not a big fan of their music.  Certainly not a fan of their ticket costs.  I don't know if I could sit through 2-3 hours of either one.

I felt the same way first time I saw Springsteen - wasn't a big fan of his music, but he blew me away live. He's one of the best live performers in history and you should definitely go see him - I can't imagine anyone not loving that show. I've never seen U2 so i can't comment.

[Stadler]

I go through this almost yearly when I see the Dave Matthews Band with my wife.  They're all fantastic musicians.  And, I can appreciate that aspect.  However, his voice is like nails on chalkboard for me.  And, a lot of the fans at the shows are really annoying.  I get that they're all just super enthusiastic about DMB.  I just don't care for the whole jam band vibe.  Two acts on my wife's bucket list for which I just can't pull the trigger are U2 and Bruce Springsteen.  Not a big fan of their music.  Certainly not a fan of their ticket costs.  I don't know if I could sit through 2-3 hours of either one.

Look, I'm as big a "tastes is tastes" guy as they come, and I get that one doesn't choose who they like...  but those two in particular are tantalizing for me.  I'm a decent U2 fan and for a while that was a band my ex-wife and I would go see just because.  They are so good as live performers I'd be stunned if you were a fan of "musicians" like Dream Theater and didn't find something to appreciate.  Love or hate him off stage, but Bono is an electric performer, and while his voice isn't what it once was, it's once as good as it ever was.   Same with Bruce; I've seen him now about five times, and although I wouldn't say I'm a huge "fan", he's got the second best show I've ever seen.  I've seen him in stadiums, arenas, and theaters, and he's probably America's greatest living artist at this point. 

I don't know; I'm not telling you what to do, but if you're at all interested in watching great (not good, GREAT) musicians perform their craft at the highest level, you can do a LOT worse than either U2 or Bruce.

[El Barto]

I sat through nintey minutes of Symphony X last night. I find their music boring and samey, for the most part. I was there for Haken. Despite my back killing me from 4 hours of standing, there was still enough there to keep me interested. Bass player's a monster and he played well with with the drummer. The lighting was also quite good. I wouldn't go so far as to say I enjoyed it, but it wasn't bad, and it was enough to keep me from bailing early (which I detest doing). That's almost always the case, I've found. Usually you can find things to keep you engaged.

[King Postwhore]

The 4 hours standing on concrete is what's killing me these days.

[hefdaddy42]

I have kids, so yes, I've seen concerts of bands (Twenty-One Pilots and Bastille spring to mind) I wouldn't otherwise choose to see.  But hey, I can usually find something to like.  I like all kinds of music, so I can usually find something to appreciate in any show.

I've never seen anyone live that the experience was dreadful.

[soupytwist]

I've taken my Niece to see a lot of teeny pop acts, and most of them are pretty poor - but Pink put on one hell of a show, seriously impressed by her on stage charisma.

[cramx3]

So me and the Mrs. got our soon to be 15 year old tix to an AJR concert for his birthday. All I know of this band is the song “Bang” and it’s not really the type of music I’d listen to.

I’m sure we’ve all sacrificed our pride to appease a loved one, hell my wife went to a Dream Theater concert with me, just curious as to what kind of experiences any of you have had in this scenario.

I've seen AJR a couple times, they are fun!  Just don't get too worked up on "it's not my music" and go in with "let's just enjoy the night".  They use a lot of backing tracks though, I think that's my biggest issue with their show, but it's quite common these days and they aren't metal so I won't hold them to the same standards. 

Here's a song I recorded of them, including the intro where they talk about how they made the beat for the song. (inspired a bit from the Beatles actually)  It's really cool.
AJR - Don't Throw Out My Legos LIVE @ Red Rocks Amphitheatre CO 10/5/2019

[Stadler]

Haha, I don't know whether to be annoyed AF by those guys or blown away impressed by those guys!   

[cramx3]

Probably neither honestly.  It's just pop music.  They do a cool stage show.  You don't go to see top level musicians like seeing DT.  You go to let loose and have fun.

Funny enough, first time I saw them, I thought they were terrible.  It was a festival line up and they were sandwiched between rock and punk bands.  Just didn't fit in at all.  I go back now and watch some of those clips I had of them and enjoy it now.  It's nothing special.  I don't even think I put their album in my 2021 album rankings, but I've come around to enjoy them for what they are.  However, lyrically, they can use some improvements. 

[Stadler]

Probably neither honestly.  It's just pop music.  They do a cool stage show.  You don't go to see top level musicians like seeing DT.  You go to let loose and have fun.

Funny enough, first time I saw them, I thought they were terrible.  It was a festival line up and they were sandwiched between rock and punk bands.  Just didn't fit in at all.  I go back now and watch some of those clips I had of them and enjoy it now.  It's nothing special.  I don't even think I put their album in my 2021 album rankings, but I've come around to enjoy them for what they are.  However, lyrically, they can use some improvements.

No, where I was going is, they clearly come from money, from creative parents.   All three went to art high school.   All three have degrees from Columbia, so they are no dummies.  One even has a Masters from New York University, and PhD in International Human Rights Law from the University of Birmingham.  I say all that with equal parts envy and admiration.   

[cramx3]

  totally didn't make that connection. I dont know about their money situation, it's weird with their lyrics. They sing about not having a good family life and not having money, but nothing about them looks that way. But optics are just that. I'm not a big enough fan to know the deets.

[ytserush]

I don't.

Fortunately we all have similar musical tastes and I have to really like a band live to see them,

Did not go with the wife and her friends to see Howard Jones (With Robin Boult ex Fish guitarist) a few years back. That's really the only time we've not seen a show together that we were both able to

My son was the one who dragged us to see Kansas many years ago. We love Kansas but never felt a need to see them live. They were great of course (Had never seen them before), but I wouldn't have gone out of my way to see them.

[Anguyen92]

I'm adding 5 Seconds of Summer to that list now of bands I've seen that's outside my alley.  It was a fun show honestly, last Saturday.  I went alone, as always, and I was in the last rows of the bleachers.  Just saw a ticket on the cheap with a good view and listened to what they were playing according to setlist.fm and off I go and I had a good time.

[Ben_Jamin]

So me and the Mrs. got our soon to be 15 year old tix to an AJR concert for his birthday. All I know of this band is the song “Bang” and it’s not really the type of music I’d listen to.

I’m sure we’ve all sacrificed our pride to appease a loved one, hell my wife went to a Dream Theater concert with me, just curious as to what kind of experiences any of you have had in this scenario.

I've seen AJR a couple times, they are fun!  Just don't get too worked up on "it's not my music" and go in with "let's just enjoy the night".  They use a lot of backing tracks though, I think that's my biggest issue with their show, but it's quite common these days and they aren't metal so I won't hold them to the same standards. 

Here's a song I recorded of them, including the intro where they talk about how they made the beat for the song. (inspired a bit from the Beatles actually)  It's really cool.
AJR - Don't Throw Out My Legos LIVE @ Red Rocks Amphitheatre CO 10/5/2019

That was a cool intro. Honestly, they are not bad. I like stuff that starts off calm, and builds into an epic grandiose sing-along ending. Funny enough, I have been getting into this type of pop music recently, so thanks for posting that video.

That's a show that I wouldn't mind seeing, but won't go out of my way to buy a ticket to. I guess, it's not my cup of tea, but also it is a show that would be interesting to see.