Why are there so many divorces in today’s society?

[WildRanger]

This could be an interesting topic for discussion.
We can see there are way more divorces today than 40 years ago.
Why? In your opinion what are the main reasons? Did people and society really change that much?

[hunnus2000]

Back in the day, divorce was tabboo. You stayed in the marriage even if it was unhealthy to both parties. I think religion played a role in that. Over time marriage became more of a contract between both parties and just like any other bad contract people can get out. People marry for the wrong reason and I personally believe that we are not meant to be monogamous for all of life.

[King Postwhore]

Back in the day, divorce was tabboo. You stayed in the marriage even if it was unhealthy to both parties. I think religion played a role in that. Over time marriage became more of a contract between both parties and just like any other bad contract people can get out. People marry for the wrong reason and I personally believe that we are not meant to be monogamous for all of life.

I don't think monogamy is the main reason people get divorced.  It's a confluence of so many things.

[Chino]

The divorce rate is the lowest it's been in decades right now. At least in the US. It's dropped something like 18% since the early 2000s.

[Ben_Jamin]

It depends how you would define Marriage.

Under Religious, and Cultural, traditions, Marriage is a pact A Male and a Female make with God, to fulfill the sacredness of life, and multiply. That's it in a nutshell. (This comes from knowing my traditional wedding customs, and how presently, both the Native and Catholic marriage traditions are followed, within some tribes here in New Mexico, I think all of them do anyways.)

What it means now, is a legal contract between two people.

Also....Could be the effect of being "Young, dumb, and in love" and jumping into things without thinking about the consequences, which is how society is today.

So it could be a mixture of both Cultural/Religious Traditions not being followed by many people anymore (and that is something that is happening in every Culture, and Religions of the world), and Society jumping into things, with disregard and with no care for the consequences.

This ties into the having kids topic for me as well.

[emtee]

I was going to write something snarky but what's the point?

People change sometimes. Realities are revealed that change everything. Cheating. Differences in philosophy, spending and saving habits. On and on.

My question is, why do you ask so many questions that have no absolute answer?

[pg1067]

We can see there are way more divorces today than 40 years ago.

We can?  Please cite or provide links to the statistics that support this premise.  What geographic are you referring to.  For example, the divorce rate in the Philippines and Vatican City is and always* has been 0%.

* - At least since 1954, and except for certain Muslims in the Philippines.

By the way, WR, I note that you have NEVER responded when I've asked you for factual support for some of the premises you throw out.  Maybe you'll just admit that you're just making stuff up or that this is nothing but your non-scientific personal observation among an extremely limited group of persons.  Of course, if that were the case, I'm not sure how you could have any knowledge of anything that was happening 40 years ago

The divorce rate is the lowest it's been in decades right now. At least in the US. It's dropped something like 18% since the early 2000s.

The study discussed in this article ( https://www.pewresearch.org/fact-tank/2017/03/09/led-by-baby-boomers-divorce-rates-climb-for-americas-50-population/#:~:text=In%202015%2C%20for%20every%201%2C000,1%2C000%20married%20persons%20in%202015. ) indicates that, between 1990-2015, the divorce rate among persons aged 25-39 dropped by 21% (from 30 to 24 persons per 1,000 married persons), the rate for persons aged 40-49 increased by 14% (from 18 to 21 persons per 1,000 married persons), and the rate for persons 50 and above increased by 109% (from 5 to 10 persons per 1,000 married persons).

The CDC reports ( https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/fastats/marriage-divorce.htm ) that the overall divorce rate in the U.S. for the year 2018, as compared to the marriage rate, was approximately 44.6%.  In 2000, that same rate was approximately 48.8%.

[Ben_Jamin]

My question is, why do you ask so many questions that have no absolute answer?

I have no clue either, why WR is posting these...But it has brought up some good discussion that I am enjoying. I like seeing peoples views and perspectives, it helps me understand the other, while also helping understand myself, as a human soul/being.

[Kwyjibo]

In your opinion what are the main reasons?

Marriage, if people wouldn't get married we'd have a lot less divorces.

[hunnus2000]

My question is, why do you ask so many questions that have no absolute answer?

Meh - it's something to talk about in these times of the covids......

[Stadler]

The divorce rate is the lowest it's been in decades right now. At least in the US. It's dropped something like 18% since the early 2000s.

I believe the marriage rate had too, at least for a big part of that time (though if memory serves, we sort of hit a plateau that started around the time of the Crash of 2009).   I know for a fact that the marriage rate (marriages per 1,000 people) have generally been dropping since the late 1970's.  That to me is a confluence of things, but one being the moral decay of our society (I'm kidding).

[hunnus2000]

The divorce rate is the lowest it's been in decades right now. At least in the US. It's dropped something like 18% since the early 2000s.

I believe the marriage rate had too, at least for a big part of that time (though if memory serves, we sort of hit a plateau that started around the time of the Crash of 2009).   I know for a fact that the marriage rate (marriages per 1,000 people) have generally been dropping since the late 1970's.  That to me is a confluence of things, but one being the moral decay of our society (I'm kidding).

That's a good point.

In an interesting observation - when I was in Dallas, the trend is to wait and have children. Women either went to college and started careers and wanted  to post-pone starting a family or had no desire in starting a family. Ever since I moved to mid-MO, it's totally the opposite - women want to have babies as soon as possible in lieu of higher education. People get married to their high school sweethearts and immediately start having a family. Now this is a generalization but it's an observation from living in a farm community.

[Dublagent66]

In your opinion what are the main reasons?

Marriage, if people wouldn't get married we'd have a lot less divorces.

You beat me to it!   You know why women used to get married a long time ago?  So they could lose their virginity and be free to do what they wanted with other men.

[The Walrus]

too easy to be drippin' in strange these days

[Kotowboy]

Cause so many TV shows are about people having affairs and dressing it up as really sexy and exciting.

[TAC]

Median age of first marriages has been on the rise as well.

https://www.census.gov/content/dam/Census/library/visualizations/time-series/demo/families-and-households/ms-2.pdf

[wolfking]

Cause so many TV shows are about people having affairs and dressing it up as really sexy and exciting.

Seriously?

[Kotowboy]

Same reason all couples argue like they do on all the TV shows.

[MoraWintersoul]

I have a theory that WR is one of those foreign agents who go to social networks to sow chaos in communities by asking them pointed questions (interspersed with music questions, which are always a little bit... weirdly researched?), but we keep sabotaging his efforts because we're very nice to each other even though we're very different.

[Chino]

Same reason all couples argue like they do on all the TV shows.

Yeah, back before the days of TV, couples would skip the argument and the man would just backhand his wife a few times.

[Ben_Jamin]

I have a theory that WR is one of those foreign agents who go to social networks to sow chaos in communities by asking them pointed questions (interspersed with music questions, which are always a little bit... weirdly researched?), but we keep sabotaging his efforts because we're very nice to each other even though we're very different.

We're the social experiment. And we're disproving their hypothesis.

Let's all praise Dream Theater....Saviors, in the square, from this systematic chaos...

[Stadler]

Cause so many TV shows are about people having affairs and dressing it up as really sexy and exciting.

I think you're kidding - I think - but in my experience, there are more people than I'd ever imagine that are willing to push the boundaries of their relationships.  I don't always think that results in divorce, but it's a complicated issue.

[ErHaO]

Over here in The Netherlands divorces are much more common than they were, according to national statistics (CBS, our public agency for statistics). About a third up to 40% of all marriages apparently end in a divorce. Also less people are marrying than ever and at a later age.

And I very much think online connectivity has a major impact. With the click of a few buttons you can view potential dates and there are even successful cheating services. And if you browse social media there are a lot of couples only presenting their ideal most romantic moments, creating an idealised image of relationships.

[MirrorMask]

I have a theory that WR is one of those foreign agents who go to social networks to sow chaos in communities by asking them pointed questions (interspersed with music questions, which are always a little bit... weirdly researched?), but we keep sabotaging his efforts because we're very nice to each other even though we're very different.

Worst case scenario, he's someone on the spectrum that has a very weird and peculiar way to understand the world around him. He's not here to spew nazi propaganda or to say that DT suck at every occasion, as much as I find it weird as well that he opens topics he never partecipates to, he's not trolling in the general sense of the term. Nobody is required to reply to his topics and they can simply be ignored if someone doesn't like or care for the subject matter.

[DragonAttack]

Why is the sky blue?  Why is water wet? 

Just curious....

[gmillerdrake]

Why is water wet? 

Water isn't wet. Wet happens when something dry comes in contact with water....water 'makes' it wet.....water itself can't be wet.


This argument brought to you by my 13 and 14 year old sons who tell me this ALL the time.

[The Walrus]

Why is water wet? 

Water isn't wet. Wet happens when something dry comes in contact with water....water 'makes' it wet.....water itself can't be wet.


This argument brought to you by my 13 and 14 year old sons who tell me this ALL the time.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TPDdRrMVEnA

[TAC]

Why is water wet? 

Water isn't wet. Wet happens when something dry comes in contact with water....water 'makes' it wet.....water itself can't be wet.


This argument brought to you by my 13 and 14 year old sons who tell me this ALL the time.

Wasn’t it Steven Wright that said “ I bought some Instant Water, but I didn’t know what to add. “

[Stadler]

I have some problems with the conclusions he draws - I think the certainty with which he holds his opinions (which sometimes blatantly disregard the facts) is a problem facing our entire country - but I think the questions are generally very thought-provoking.   I notice none of his threads stop at the first page.



(I also think it would be funny if he was a PhD-candidate psychology student or a CIA scientist, and we're all guinea pigs for the latest MKUltra-type CIA program.)

[The Walrus]

In the long long ago, I was once part of a message board that had this one guy named duckbear who polled a very large, very active board for literally years on end. And after like 8 years of polling he unleashed all the data he gathered over the decade asking completely random, off the wall questions of anybody who would respond. Literally kept all that data tracked for a decade just for fun, no actual purpose. And then he posted it and I don't think I ever saw a peep of him again 

[kirksnosehair]

Three words:


NO FAULT DIVORCE

[H2]

Third-wave feminism? Low-key serious. For perhaps good and bad reasons. But I think it contributed strongly to a devaluing of marriage in many people's minds, especially in the secular world. Now you have a lot of reasons both men and women don't want to marry. Men fear divorce, they fear losing custody of their children, they fear being nagged, they fear being shackled to an aging wife; the life of a cowboy is way more attractive than the married life. For women, well, perhaps it's that men these days are more pathetic than they've been in the past. Worse habits, video game/pornography addictions, lack of responsibility and ambition, etc.. So I don't think men or women see much advantage to getting married anymore. And maybe those who do get married quickly see that it was a mistake.

[MoraWintersoul]

In the long long ago, I was once part of a message board that had this one guy named duckbear who polled a very large, very active board for literally years on end. And after like 8 years of polling he unleashed all the data he gathered over the decade asking completely random, off the wall questions of anybody who would respond. Literally kept all that data tracked for a decade just for fun, no actual purpose. And then he posted it and I don't think I ever saw a peep of him again 

And then he followed you to this board.

[Elite]

In the long long ago, I was once part of a message board that had this one guy named duckbear who polled a very large, very active board for literally years on end. And after like 8 years of polling he unleashed all the data he gathered over the decade asking completely random, off the wall questions of anybody who would respond. Literally kept all that data tracked for a decade just for fun, no actual purpose. And then he posted it and I don't think I ever saw a peep of him again 

This is amazing

[wolfking]

In the long long ago, I was once part of a message board that had this one guy named duckbear who polled a very large, very active board for literally years on end. And after like 8 years of polling he unleashed all the data he gathered over the decade asking completely random, off the wall questions of anybody who would respond. Literally kept all that data tracked for a decade just for fun, no actual purpose. And then he posted it and I don't think I ever saw a peep of him again 

Talk about a mic drop.