Are men more promiscuous than women?

[WildRanger]

What you think? And why?

[lonestar]

From my experience, no.

[Chino]

I think women are more selective with who they have sex with, but have sex drives equal to that of men.

[El Barto]

I think women are more selective with who they have sex with, but have sex drives equal to that of men.

They can afford to be.

And I think that's why men are seen as more promiscuous. For most of us there isn't always an opportunity waiting around the corner.

[Phoenix87x]

No.

[The Walrus]

I don't like generalizing massive groups of people

[pg1067]

I don't like generalizing massive groups of people

^^This^^

What's next?  Are women more sensitive than men?  Are persons of east Asian descent better at math and science than persons of European descent?

[Stadler]

I know for me, I was very surprised when hitting the dating scene after my divorce.   It's different in how it manifests, but there is no shortage of women who are ready, willing and able to engage in promiscuous sex.  It's more subtle, it's more nuanced, but I'm no prize, and I had more instances of leaving stuff on the table than #MeToo moments.

[cramx3]

I don't know the answer, but I'm guessing males and females are pretty similar in their desire for sex, but go about it different ways.  If women are more selective by nature then they would be less "promiscuous" than men. 

Of course:

I don't like generalizing massive groups of people

but just for the sake of discussion, I guess my answer would be yes, in general. I too realized after I went through my last break up that girls were just as horny as guys and it was much harder to have sex in high school than it is now, but that's kind of meaningless.  When I was on tinder, I bet you I swiped right at a rate of 100 to 1 of that of the average girl. Also a fairly meaningless stat, but I just think it comes down to nature and how males/females were designed, with men needing to inject their sperm into any girl who would take it and females being selective to find the best mate for their baby.  This isn't even just a human trait, but many animals have this behavior.  Obviously it's more complicated than that but that's kind of how I feel about it.

[Orbert]

Absolutely, and I say this from a sample size of exactly one: me.

There is a certain percentage of women I see or meet every day who I would have sex with.  From experience, I know that the percentage of women I see or meet every day who want to have sex with me is much, much lower.

The answer therefore is Yes, with empirical evidence to back it up.



Wait, was this a serious question?

[MirrorMask]

I don't like generalizing massive groups of people

This. I never understood why the fact that some people are born with a penis is enough to make predictions about them (the same reason why horoscopes are utter and complete bullshit).

We all have the same sexual desires. Sex is the act that makes our species go on, therefore it's a pleasant thing to do, and we have developed enough brains to enjoy it beyond its mere usefuleness and therefore we all have the same cravings. How often we get it going depends on our actual occasions, and of course cultural background, one's own character, the people we know and all sort of things that can't be predicted just by looking at what's in someone's pants.

I think on more general terms that mankind is long overdue the time it should accept that each person has sexual desires and should not characterize people based on how and how often they get it. The concept that a man that gets many women is a stallion and a woman that gets many men is a slut is ridiculous. If nobody would judge nobody there will be less mental and cultural barriers for everyone and we'd all get laid more.

[Stadler]

I get the reticence to generalize, but it's a worthy sociological discussion to have.   It takes two to tango, and unless you're willing to get into the more dangerous (and specious) argument that most no-strings-attached sex is a result of deception or abuse of power (or rape, given the implications of those on consent) you have to explain the popularity of apps like Tinder, and the impression that Match is just a more dignified, mature hook-up app.   

EDIT: To MirrorMask: I can't speak to anyone else here, but there is no judgment involved on my end.  Any reluctance to participate on my end was only a matter of my personal circumstances, my conscience and my comfort level (that is, the risk of long term consequences to one night of fun, be it pregnancy, or a misunderstanding of where the relationship was going in the future). It's not as if I was making any of the judgments you are talking about, and thankfully my world is small enough that I don't think I should have been.  What any of these women did was their business, and more power to them. They were, without exception, adults and capable of making whatever decisions are right for them.  And in terms of my partner (or I should say, future partner) it was nice to know that she might have a healthy sex drive going in. 

[Chino]

I don't like generalizing massive groups of people

This. I never understood why the fact that some people are born with a penis is enough to make predictions about them

Because biology?     

[The Walrus]

I mean, I think men are, generally speaking, naturally more "promiscuous" if only because males are wired to, uh, sow their seeds - but that's about as far as I go with that because obviously there are billions of men out there and we all possess various levels of libido, charisma, attractiveness to any of the billions of other women on the planet, ability to actually do the horizontal monster mash... etc.

[MirrorMask]

I don't like generalizing massive groups of people

This. I never understood why the fact that some people are born with a penis is enough to make predictions about them

Because biology?   

Biology alone isn't enough to predict accurately the behaviour of different people. Guy A is in 20's, he's born and lived in Europe always in the same place. Guy B is in his 30's, he's born in the UK but has traveled a lot around the world. Guy C is in his 40's, he's born in the USA. Am I to predict their behavior towards women just because all three of them have a penis?

@Stadler: well, it's only normal for me what you say, no judgment and no looking down involved. And most people I know are the same. But the prejudice, at least around Italy, is definitively there, and the mentality that a woman should not open her legs whenever she damns wants to out of her own free will still influences the relationships between the two genders. But with newer generations I guess it will pass.

[cramx3]

I mean, I think men are, generally speaking, naturally more "promiscuous" if only because males are wired to, uh, sow their seeds - but that's about as far as I go with that because obviously there are billions of men out there and we all possess various levels of libido, charisma, attractiveness to any of the billions of other women on the planet, ability to actually do the horizontal monster mash... etc.

Yea, thats essentially where I was going.  We all know people who aren't the generalization, but I think because of biology and if I am trying to answer this question, I say yes but I know that is not the standard for everyone.  I do think we are all adults here that we shouldn't have to clarify the generalization part, but I'm just trying to have the discussion without offending someone. 

[Stadler]

Plus, are we being honest with ourselves?  I know for me - and I'm probably sharing too much here - but I'm 51.  I more than willing to admit that what I THINK and what I DO are sometimes at odds, and not always comfortably so.   Not as much now that I am married, but when I was "in-between" there was almost always a moment - even if fleeting - where in the general assessment of the environment and circumstances there would be a moment dedicated to "any potential partners here?"  I don't have to act on it, I don't have to even admit to anyone else that it's happening, but that's where the biological/sociological rubber hits the road.   

Whether I actually followed through on that is a very complicated, very complex cocktail of morals, self-esteem, consequences, odds, pragmatism, etc.  I think this question is unanswerable, unless and until we can address how many of us see the world through similar or different lenses.   

[WildRanger]

The concept that a man that gets many women is a stallion and a woman that gets many men is a slut is ridiculous.

That double standard is absolutely wrong.

[Dublagent66]

Depends on who the person is.  Gender has nothing to do with it.

[jammindude]

Women can try to brag...but they are completely unequivocally WRONG.

There are exceptions!!! And yes there are “high drive” women and “low drive” men...but GENERALLY speaking men are far more often “high drive” and women (while being better in many other different ways) absolutely are NOT as high drive as men are.

I still remember a study (and yes, it’s only a memory, so I don’t have a link....but I’m totally open to newer studies proving me wrong) that took a poll of the frequency with which the different kinds of couples were “making whoopie”. The study showed that male homosexual couples generally had the highest rate of going at it, heterosexual m/f couples were second, and female homosexual couples did it with the least frequency.

[TempusVox]

One day, my spirit will leave the vessel where it presently resides; and will soar off through the universe, on an entirely different journey. Should that journey conclude at the Pearly Gates, I fear I'll be told about all the demerits I acquired because of all the times I got laid. I've literally had hundreds of partners. Far more than I feel I was ever allotted. So, part of me feels men have a much greater need for sex. However, I never really felt willing partners were in short supply. So, I think it's probably equal for most people; with extreme circumstances either way.

[bosk1]

...all the demerits I acquired

I really hope you know that isn't remotely how it works.

[Lethean]

Oh wow you know how it works Bosk?  That's pretty impressive.

[bosk1]

  It's not exactly a secret. 

[TempusVox]

 

Of course, but I can dream can't I?

[NunoTenniscourt]

I know for me, I was very surprised when hitting the dating scene after my divorce.   It's different in how it manifests, but there is no shortage of women who are ready, willing and able to engage in promiscuous sex.  It's more subtle, it's more nuanced, but I'm no prize, and I had more instances of leaving stuff on the table than #MeToo moments.

No shortage indeed. The concept of "good girls" is a myth. There are girls and there are socially programmed girls, but a lot of the ones attempting to cast the illusion of being a "good girl" are acting on their desires and simply keeping a tight lid on it. 

[Stadler]

I know for me, I was very surprised when hitting the dating scene after my divorce.   It's different in how it manifests, but there is no shortage of women who are ready, willing and able to engage in promiscuous sex.  It's more subtle, it's more nuanced, but I'm no prize, and I had more instances of leaving stuff on the table than #MeToo moments.

No shortage indeed. The concept of "good girls" is a myth. There are girls and there are socially programmed girls, but a lot of the ones attempting to cast the illusion of being a "good girl" are acting on their desires and simply keeping a tight lid on it.

I know for me, I felt it was incumbent on me to help them (not the right word) do that.  I didn't have to be a dick about it. I'm a lawyer, so I get the base level idea of "consent", but I think morally there is more to it than that.  I thought it was important to view "consent" more than just in the moment, and yet... almost every woman I talked with around that time had a story about some guy that weren't so understanding or considerate, and made them feel stupid or used about their feelings, whether it was by treating them like dirt for having normal sexual desires, or just discarding them when they had their fill.  Sorry, off topic, I know, but it was an experience/phenomena that I haven't really completely moved past, to be honest. 

[jammindude]

There’s a difference between women who use it to “bag one” and women who are actually into it. And they behave the same way in the short term. But the true colors come out in long term.

[Zook]

Is WildRanger really AndyDT in disguise?