Things that I find mildly irritating v.2

[Stadler]

You two are the worst posters in the history of forums.

I actually have a version of that tattooed on my lower back.

I know. I saw it. 

 

[pg1067]

Mild irritation?
- when people - usually girls, for some reason - pronounce "food" to rhyme with "feud". 
- when people add "super" to every adjective.  "I'm SUPER excited about seeing Candace Night next week."   "That's a SUPER great post, Stadler!"

Moderate, bordering on severe, irritation?
- the increasing tendency to over-hyperbolize everything.   Taylor Swift isn't just an average singer, she's the "worst singer in pop history".   Trump isn't just a polarizing President, he is "stunningly, transcendently incompetent!"

This is the most super-ridiculous thing I've ever read in my entire life!

[pg1067]

I was reminded recently of something that isn't really a big deal anymore but used to be incredibly irritating.

Female companion:  "Oh...don't get me any fries; I'll just eat some of yours."

What I want to say:  The fuck you will!

[Dublagent66]

I think it was not too long ago I was mildly irritated by something, but I forgot what it was.  Oh well, I'll try to remember the next one...

[TAC]

I was reminded recently of something that isn't really a big deal anymore but used to be incredibly irritating.

Female companion:  "Oh...don't get me any fries; I'll just eat some of yours."

What I want to say:  The fuck you will!

 

My wife does this all the time. We'll go through the drive through at Dunkin' and I'll ask her if she wants a coffee, and it's always, I'll have some of yours. That medium I was going to order just turned into a large.

[Stadler]

I was reminded recently of something that isn't really a big deal anymore but used to be incredibly irritating.

Female companion:  "Oh...don't get me any fries; I'll just eat some of yours."

What I want to say:  The fuck you will!

 

My wife does this all the time. We'll go through the drive through at Dunkin' and I'll ask her if she wants a coffee, and it's always, I'll have some of yours. That medium I was going to order just turned into a large.

At least she asked before you bought.  My ex used to say "Nah, I'm good."   I'd be pulling out of the drive through and she'd be all "Hey, can I have a sip of that?"  The fuck you will!

[Snow Dog]

I was reminded recently of something that isn't really a big deal anymore but used to be incredibly irritating.

Female companion:  "Oh...don't get me any fries; I'll just eat some of yours."

What I want to say:  The fuck you will!

My wife does this all the time. We'll go through the drive through at Dunkin' and I'll ask her if she wants a coffee, and it's always, I'll have some of yours. That medium I was going to order just turned into a large.

At least she asked before you bought.  My ex used to say "Nah, I'm good."   I'd be pulling out of the drive through and she'd be all "Hey, can I have a sip of that?"  The fuck you will!

My wife absolutely does this. Orders salad at a restaurant and asks to pilfer “a few” fries front my burger platter. Sometimes it’s truly just a few, others it’s literally 1/3 of what’s in front of me.

Other frequent happenenings:
“Can I have a sip?” turns into 3-4 full size swallows.

“Can I have a bite of what you’re having?” Then ensues a monster chomp the size of 2-3 regular bites. And me being a picky eater, half the time I don’t like what she’s eating and won’t enjoy returning the favor.

[jingle.boy]

Speaking of wife irritations.... when the fuck did she forget how to use an ATM.  Whenever she needs money, it's straight to my wallet.  I swear to god I want to put a fucking PIN on it.  Seriously, it shouldn't annoy me (we're not the couple that has 'mine' and 'your' money... it's all 'our' money), but it annoys the hell out of me.

Same goes for gas.  First, she gets all freaky the instant the light comes on the dashboard - she won't even go a few miles.  Second, she practically insists that I take the vehicle with the lowest gas, so that I'm always the one filling it up.  I've even gone out in the evening before bed to fill it up, because she can't/won't leave a few minutes early to wherever she's going in the morning to fill it up.

/endrant

[Indiscipline]

I was reminded recently of something that isn't really a big deal anymore but used to be incredibly irritating.

Female companion:  "Oh...don't get me any fries; I'll just eat some of yours."

What I want to say:  The fuck you will!

Amen. By now I'm Pavlov-programmed to order two spoons with whatever dessert I'm having.

[King Postwhore]

Speaking of wife irritations.... when the fuck did she forget how to use an ATM.  Whenever she needs money, it's straight to my wallet.  I swear to god I want to put a fucking PIN on it.  Seriously, it shouldn't annoy me (we're not the couple that has 'mine' and 'your' money... it's all 'our' money), but it annoys the hell out of me.

Same goes for gas.  First, she gets all freaky the instant the light comes on the dashboard - she won't even go a few miles.  Second, she practically insists that I take the vehicle with the lowest gas, so that I'm always the one filling it up.  I've even gone out in the evening before bed to fill it up, because she can't/won't leave a few minutes early to wherever she's going in the morning to fill it up.

/endrant

I have so much more I could add.

[Phoenix87x]

I have so much more I could add.

Please do. I am curious to hear your thoughts.

[Stadler]

Same goes for gas.  First, she gets all freaky the instant the light comes on the dashboard - she won't even go a few miles.  Second, she practically insists that I take the vehicle with the lowest gas, so that I'm always the one filling it up.  I've even gone out in the evening before bed to fill it up, because she can't/won't leave a few minutes early to wherever she's going in the morning to fill it up.

Your wife isn't from Connecticut is she?   Because that's my current wife.  It doesn't help that I've run out of gas a couple times in my life, and I've told her about them, but she even gets freaky at a 1/4 a tank so it's not just about that.   I don't really mind filling the tank - at least between April and November - but still.

[TAC]

Speaking of wife irritations.... when the fuck did she forget how to use an ATM.  Whenever she needs money, it's straight to my wallet.  I swear to god I want to put a fucking PIN on it.  Seriously, it shouldn't annoy me (we're not the couple that has 'mine' and 'your' money... it's all 'our' money), but it annoys the hell out of me.

My wife always has money. Always. If she sees two bucks on my bureau, she's like, "Where did you get that?" I thinking "It's TWO fucking dollars! Who cares!"

[Chino]

Job listings online don't post a salary range for the position.

There are two cannabis industry jobs (compliance management) in this state that I am perfectly qualified for and I am entertaining the thought of applying just for shits, but I really don't want to go through the hassle of updating my resume, creating a new cover letter, and taking time off to interview only to find out it pays $15 an hour.

[The Walrus]

Rocks and other debris when trying to do grass work. Loads of super tiny rocks and dirt along the road and front grass at work and they usually aren't bad but today I hit a fairly large one and beaned the lower part of my shin hard enough that I'm still feeling deep pain there, and hit something that nearly took my eye out. At least I got the grass edged...

[Grappler]

Rocks and other debris when trying to do grass work. Loads of super tiny rocks and dirt along the road and front grass at work and they usually aren't bad but today I hit a fairly large one and beaned the lower part of my shin hard enough that I'm still feeling deep pain there, and hit something that nearly took my eye out. At least I got the grass edged...

I always wear safety glasses when doing string trimming or edging for that reason. 

[King Postwhore]

Your wifes cell phone voicemail is not working and you're on the phone for an hour and no results yet. 

[TAC]

Sounds like someone is in trouble.

[King Postwhore]

1 1/2 later and it's fixed.  No answer to why it happened.

[pg1067]

I was reminded of this one this morning:

Sometimes, when in a public restroom or fast-food or similar restaurant, the paper towel or napkin dispenser will be stuffed so full that it is impossible to extract a towel or napkin without ripping the first several to shreds.  When this happens and the dispenser allows for it, I will usually open the dispenser up and get my towels/napkins that way.  Otherwise, I'll just dig in and pull out about 20 so that the pressure is alleviated.

[The Walrus]

Rocks and other debris when trying to do grass work. Loads of super tiny rocks and dirt along the road and front grass at work and they usually aren't bad but today I hit a fairly large one and beaned the lower part of my shin hard enough that I'm still feeling deep pain there, and hit something that nearly took my eye out. At least I got the grass edged...

I always wear safety glasses when doing string trimming or edging for that reason.

I wasn't wearing safety glasses but I was wearing sunglasses and was amazed at how it managed to still fly past them and hit me so close to the eye. Like, of all the millions of possible trajectories it could have taken...

[Grappler]

Things that I find very irritating:

People who use staple removers to pinch and PULL a staple out, ripping the corner of a document.  If you place the prongs under the staple and just squeeze, and the staple will pop out easily.  There's no need to physically pull and rip a basic staple out. 

So many official insurance policy documents that I get from my company's receptionist or mailroom have the corners ripped apart.  It's embarrassing to send a document in that condition to a client and is completely infuriating when it's such an easy thing to remedy...but a lot of people don't understand how to actually use a staple remover without damaging paper.

[Chino]

In my 29 years of existence, I don't think I've ever used a staple remover. I have had one in my desk drawer for nearly 5 years now.

[cramx3]

Can't remember the last time I even saw a staple remover

[King Postwhore]

In my 29 years of existence, I don't think I've ever used a staple remover. I have had on in my desk drawer for nearly 5 years now.

I use one all the time.

[Phoenix87x]

Looks like the one time I used a staple remover, I did it wrong 

[JayOctavarium]

I never knew this was how to use a staple remover.

I just tried it... and my mind has been BLOWN.

[pg1067]

Things that I find very irritating:

People who use staple removers to pinch and PULL a staple out, ripping the corner of a document.  If you place the prongs under the staple and just squeeze, and the staple will pop out easily.  There's no need to physically pull and rip a basic staple out. 

So many official insurance policy documents that I get from my company's receptionist or mailroom have the corners ripped apart.  It's embarrassing to send a document in that condition to a client and is completely infuriating when it's such an easy thing to remedy...but a lot of people don't understand how to actually use a staple remover without damaging paper.

Yeah...'cause a staple remover is such a precision device that always works exactly as intended.

Unfortunately, the only staple remover I have at my desk is not the type you described, so I cannot conduct my normal rigorous scientific testing.

Notwithstanding the above, I get your point, although I usually just use my thumb nail to remove staples.

[Cool Chris]

I often find more success using the staple remover on the back of the staple.

[King Postwhore]

The flat style it 1 million times better than the old school claw.

[Dublagent66]

I was reminded recently of something that isn't really a big deal anymore but used to be incredibly irritating.

Female companion:  "Oh...don't get me any fries; I'll just eat some of yours."

What I want to say:  The fuck you will!

 

My wife does this all the time. We'll go through the drive through at Dunkin' and I'll ask her if she wants a coffee, and it's always, I'll have some of yours. That medium I was going to order just turned into a large.

Tim Tim Tim...gotta take charge man!  That should translate into a small for her or none at all. 

[TAC]

I was reminded recently of something that isn't really a big deal anymore but used to be incredibly irritating.

Female companion:  "Oh...don't get me any fries; I'll just eat some of yours."

What I want to say:  The fuck you will!

 

My wife does this all the time. We'll go through the drive through at Dunkin' and I'll ask her if she wants a coffee, and it's always, I'll have some of yours. That medium I was going to order just turned into a large.

Tim Tim Tim...gotta take charge man!  That should translate into a small for her or none at all. 

I've been married a long time, Steve. If I said I wanted a large, she'd go all "Do you really need a large?" on me.

But all she wants is a sip. Maybe two. So I basically get my large, and look polite doing it.   

[Stadler]

I was reminded recently of something that isn't really a big deal anymore but used to be incredibly irritating.

Female companion:  "Oh...don't get me any fries; I'll just eat some of yours."

What I want to say:  The fuck you will!

 

My wife does this all the time. We'll go through the drive through at Dunkin' and I'll ask her if she wants a coffee, and it's always, I'll have some of yours. That medium I was going to order just turned into a large.

Tim Tim Tim...gotta take charge man!  That should translate into a small for her or none at all. 

I've been married a long time, Steve. If I said I wanted a large, she'd go all "Do you really need a large?" on me.

But all she wants is a sip. Maybe two. So I basically get my large, and look polite doing it.   

There's a whole 'nother language to being married, there is. 

[King Postwhore]

You mean when they talk out loud hoping for a response?

"Why does these dishes pile up"? - Lisa

My responses in my head,

"You need to stay ahead of these dishes honey"!
"I do all the cooking Lisa, at least you could do the dishes"!

My real response,  "Ok honey. Be right there". Lol

[TAC]

Hah!

I just tell her to jab me once for yes and twice for no.