In an alternate universe, Orbert is a multi-billionaire and likes to buy things that normal people cannot, because it makes him feel special.
Today, his package from St. Eriks arrived, and his hot female butler opened it and brought it to him:
They are perfect. Five of them, in perfect condition:
Of course, they look like potato chips. They
are potato chips, you uncultured swine!
Certified, premium potato chips from St. Eriks.
His butler presented one to him.
He fired her, for daring touch one of his potato chips. Bummer. She was hot. But rules are rules. That's okay, the next one will have bigger tits.
I am completely serious. Over $50 (U.S.) for a box of five, and you can't have any, because they're all sold out. Alternate Orbert bought the last box. If a Star Trek-type event happens and universes collapse into one and I ever meet this alternate Orbert, I will punch him in the face.