The loss of a pet is something I have not experienced since I was a 16 year old when my family lost our cat.
I’m 51 and I have never had to put down an animal in my life. That changed on Wednesday when we had to bring our 20 year old cat Mooper in to be put to rest. This is the one and only pet I have ever had in my adult life and he been part of the fiber of my life for 20 years. I loved him with all my heart.
In 2014 we thought we had to put him down due to a large tumor in his ear that kept filling with blood and popping. It was turning our house into a slaughter house. The vet said at that point he was healthy besides the tumor and surgery was an option. Knowing the odds were about 50/50 it would be successful and it would cost 1000 dollars we opted to try it. It was a success! Our old pal was coming back home. I cried tears of joy, when you hours earlier I had tears of pain swelling my eyes.
So fast forward 15 months later we knew this time he would not be returning home with us. He had lost so much weight. He was having accidents on the carpet for the first time ever. He couldn’t clean himself. He could barely walk anymore. He was even having a hard with accomplishing his biggest passion. He was struggling to eat so we had to puree his food.
They say you know when it’s time to put down a pet and we certainly knew it was his time. Our hearts were so heavy Wednesday having to say goodbye to our pal. Our wonderful, cat was in need of rest.
Putting him in the carrier I burst into uncontrollable crying knowing the end was near. No more having him hop in my lap. No more making me nearly trip and kill myself while getting under my feet every night as I prepared dinner. No more having him strolling into the bathroom at 3:00am to greet me as I took a leak.
The look in his eyes made me sad. Did he know what was to come? Was he sad his life with us was coming to an end? All the crazy things you think in a moment like that.
When we got to the vet I became increasingly more emotional, but was trying hard to control it. Finally it was time to bring him into the room and put him on the table. The wonderful sweet female vet who has always been so sweet through the years gave us the option to stay in the room or to leave before his was giving the injection. She sedated him to calm him and said take all the time you need with him. Take an hour if you need it she said. I was a mess. My wife looked at me and said what do you want to do honey? I’m going to stay with him. I told her, I’m sorry but I just can’t. I had to say my goodbye and leave the room. It was so hard to walk away for me.
I then told the vet she could go in, my wife was ready. My wife Laurette said she held him in her arms in a blanket and he went quickly and very peacefully. I am struggling with this and the loss of his presence.
I know 20 years is a ridiculous run for a cat but it’s also a long time to be in love with him.
I will miss my buddy.
Rest in peace, Mooper.
1996-2016
Gone but never forgotten!
Topic: The Loss Of My Pet. A therapy writing session (Read 1150 times)