Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip

[The Walrus]

I don't like the idea of a friend zone as the boys call it, but my initial intention is just to know her better anyway and worst case scenario is I have a cool new friend I can talk about some stuff with

[The Walrus]

So remember how I talked myself into thinking that girl isn't interested? I could be totally off base here, but over the last few weeks she regularly messages me out of the blue asking how my day is going/weekend was/random shit like her dinner, or launching into a tirade about something that she found funny/annoying. Now, I might be completely CLUELESS, but that always confuses me when it comes from a girl I'm into. At the same time, I've had a girl from my past tell me just today she wants to be with me, especially in the future when she's back in the area, and she's batshit crazy so I'm like whooooooa hold up  I cast my net out to a few other girls, too; none have been as receptive as girl #1, though, but they're all nice.

All that leads me to the big roadblock of 2020-2021: how the hell are you supposed to date anybody during this pandemic?! What do you do for dates? Gonna have to get 1950s with it and have a damn picnic I guess. 

[Stadler]

She might be scared to follow through, but that chick is at least mildly digging you.   

As for dating, got me.  Might as well as me to explain a black hole or a supernova.

[The Walrus]

You think? It'd be nice. 

[cramx3]

I couldn't tell you how dating would work during this era, but if you got along well enough through chatting, at some point I'd imagine you'd both be comfortable with meeting up for like a coffee outside or something like that.  I'd be totally cool just doing a walk in the park or something as well on a first date, even wear a mask if necessary or to make us both feel comfortable.  I certainly am not going to kiss with a mask on though 

[Adami]

I met my lady during COVID.

It was a bit odd at first. Lots of texting led to phone calls and face time. I strongly suggest FaceTime. It really helps weed out the people you’re not gonna feel comfy with.

Eventually we met up. First date was just a long walk and visit to a lovely park with masks. Second date we felt safe enough to visit her place with no masks. Cooked dinner together.

It’s hard at the beginning and you have to be creative. Most traditional early dates don’t work right now.

[jingle.boy]

She might be scared to follow through, but that chick is at least mildly digging you.   

As for dating, got me.  Might as well as me to explain a black hole or a supernova.

Or politics

[The Walrus]

Um so, girl in question asked me out on a date out of the blue 

Ya boy is back!!

[Adami]

Um so, girl in question asked me out on a date out of the blue 

Ya boy is back!!

Please resort back to my previous advice.

[The Walrus]

 

That made my night honestly. The being asked out. I think that's the first time the girl has asked me. Wow 

[MoraWintersoul]

your date: "yeah, so, this guy is never gonna figure out that I like him. I message him randomly, we talk about cute shit, I take interest in him, and he still hasn't asked me out."
her friend: "sounds like you should ask him out yourself and find out"
your date: "yeah but what if he hasn't asked because he just doesn't like me he'd have to be really clueless not to notice that I obviously like him. oh well let's find out!"

[The Walrus]

 

[cramx3]

  congrats on getting a date with the girl you like

[Stadler]

Yeah, good luck.  Congratulations!   

[cramx3]

Also, for the female asking you out, I'm starting to think that is going to be more common.  My last x actually asked me to be her bf.  Kind of surprised me, but I think lots of the females today have no issue letting a guy know what they want.

[Stadler]

Also, for the female asking you out, I'm starting to think that is going to be more common.  My last x actually asked me to be her bf.  Kind of surprised me, but I think lots of the females today have no issue letting a guy know what they want.

I for one have ZERO problem with that. 

[The Walrus]

I have double zero problem with that. 

[Phoenix87x]

I've had a couple women ask me out. Had one even walk up to me out of the blue in a restaurant and give me her number, lol.

I 100% prefer that, since for most of my life I didn't understand how to read their subtle interest queues. I do now, but it took a very long time to figure it out.

[Chino]

The last time I got on Bumble, some 11 months ago or so, I just said the hell with it and just started asking out every girl I matched with. Didn't matter if we were only 3 lines in. The amount that responded with a yes was shocking to me.   

My last GF/GF/partial ex/kind of maybe fiancé paid the tab on our first date. That one through me for a ringer.

[lordxizor]

The last time I got on Bumble, some 11 months ago or so, I just said the hell with it and just started asking out every girl I matched with. Didn't matter if we were only 3 lines in. The amount that responded with a yes was shocking to me.   

I can't remember why I bothered reading it since I'm married, but I read something about how to have success in online dating and the #1 thing was to actually ask the person out on a date. Apparently most people chat for a little while and it peters out without anyone actually asking to meet. I'm going to guess that so few men actually ask a woman out through online dating that most will say yes to almost anyone who seems half decent just to have something real to judge you on instead of just a few messages.

[Phoenix87x]

With online dating, I would chat over the course of 3 days and then ask if they wanted to meet in person.

Pre covid, people were fine meeting in person for the first date, but if someone didn't want to meet I was prepared to ask them if they wanted to talk on the phone. Either way, it was important to progress it beyond just messaging.

[Stadler]

The last time I got on Bumble, some 11 months ago or so, I just said the hell with it and just started asking out every girl I matched with. Didn't matter if we were only 3 lines in. The amount that responded with a yes was shocking to me.   

My last GF/GF/partial ex/kind of maybe fiancé paid the tab on our first date. That one through me for a ringer.

Wait, wut?   

[Chino]

The last time I got on Bumble, some 11 months ago or so, I just said the hell with it and just started asking out every girl I matched with. Didn't matter if we were only 3 lines in. The amount that responded with a yes was shocking to me.   

My last GF/GF/partial ex/kind of maybe fiancé paid the tab on our first date. That one through me for a ringer.

Wait, wut?   

It's a very unhealthily relationship 

[Stadler]

The last time I got on Bumble, some 11 months ago or so, I just said the hell with it and just started asking out every girl I matched with. Didn't matter if we were only 3 lines in. The amount that responded with a yes was shocking to me.   

My last GF/GF/partial ex/kind of maybe fiancé paid the tab on our first date. That one through me for a ringer.

Wait, wut?   

It's a very unhealthily relationship 

I'm not here to judge. 

[MoraWintersoul]

Kind of surprised me, but I think lots of the females today have no issue letting a guy know what they want.

The next guy who dates any of my friends can thank me for that, I've been spreading the good word about asking men out first for years now it's a super hack. Even if he's not interested right now/going through something, he's definitely gonna remember you.

[Chino]

The last time I got on Bumble, some 11 months ago or so, I just said the hell with it and just started asking out every girl I matched with. Didn't matter if we were only 3 lines in. The amount that responded with a yes was shocking to me.   

My last GF/GF/partial ex/kind of maybe fiancé paid the tab on our first date. That one through me for a ringer.

Wait, wut?   

It's a very unhealthily relationship 

I'm not here to judge. 

Oh feel free. I'll be the first to admit it's batshit crazy. I judge myself very harshly for it, and I expect other do the same 

[King Postwhore]

Hey, some cute guys are actually shy.  Right Milena?  Doesn't hurt at all for a girl to ask. 

[MoraWintersoul]

Yup, they're still not used to being asked, or being told you are interested in them. It's a good way to stand out 

[The Walrus]

Honestly yeah, I was taken aback when she asked me before I asked her. Fortunately she seems to be the kind of girl who gives the finger to normal traditions. pls more of that in the world ty

[Phoenix87x]

I find strait forwardness a huge turn on honestly. Trying to figure out why someone is upset only for them to say "you know what you did" or total silent treatment is pretty lame.

[Anguyen92]

your date: "yeah, so, this guy is never gonna figure out that I like him. I message him randomly, we talk about cute shit, I take interest in him, and he still hasn't asked me out."
her friend: "sounds like you should ask him out yourself and find out"
your date: "yeah but what if he hasn't asked because he just doesn't like me he'd have to be really clueless not to notice that I obviously like him. oh well let's find out!"

I've seen too many romcom manga series where it's played out very similar to this.  It frustrates me as a reader.

[Stadler]

Kind of surprised me, but I think lots of the females today have no issue letting a guy know what they want.

The next guy who dates any of my friends can thank me for that, I've been spreading the good word about asking men out first for years now it's a super hack. Even if he's not interested right now/going through something, he's definitely gonna remember you.

I love it; it shifts the dynamic a bit - now I'm in the position of having to give the "it's not you, it's me" speech if it comes to that - but for me, who is not a wallflower and is attracted to women who aren't wallflowers, it's a positive thing for any relationship, and it sets the tone.   

[H2]

Back to the singles thread. Well, could've been here for about 3 years. How's it going?

[cramx3]

Back to the singles thread. Well, could've been here for about 3 years. How's it going?

Not even trying personally

[Sacul]

Waiting for the right moment.