Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip

[bout to crash]

So Vermont resurfaced yesterday and was very apologetic. He said he was super busy with his new job and had roommate drama (he lives with several people and apparently one is a huge dick) and totally blanked on contacting me. After attempting to make plans for lots of different days (I had plans all of them) he eventually asked if I was free last night and I happened to be. He made up for his flakiness quite well, I think . We probably won't see each other for a few weeks the way things are going, but I have enough detachment at this point that I'm not too worried about it. He's super fun and I like hanging with him a lot, but know better than to invest much at this point.

In other news, I have a date with the ginger tomorrow! I have been enjoying hanging with her but have to say some things about her personality rub me the wrong way. Nothing terrible or deal-breaking, I'm just noticing it happening.

[JayOctavarium]

Gingers tend to do that.

Source: Dated one for 4 years.

[Prog Snob]

I'm hopeful about this. She's quite an amazing woman. We've been texting from morning till night since Tuesday afternoon. Last night we spent a few hours on the phone BSing. It's nice to finally be able to connect with someone with a head on their shoulders.

Yea, that is great, sounds good then.

We're supposed to get together tomorrow night.

[Chino]

Gingers tend to do that.

Source: Dated one for 4 years.

That what happens when a person lacks a soul.

[King Postwhore]

Gingers tend to do that.

Source: Dated one for 4 years.

I say your ginger was unbalanced.   I've been with the same ginger since 1991.

[bout to crash]

Does your ginger assume everybody is attracted to her because she's a ginger? That weirds me out.

[King Postwhore]

Nope.  She is pleasantly surprised when she gets hit on. 

[Chino]

Last time I brought my dog to the vet, we saw a new doctor lady. She was a ginger and possibly one of the top 10 most beautiful women I've ever seen with my own eyes.

[Prog Snob]

Last time I brought my dog to the vet, we saw a new doctor lady. She was a ginger and possibly one of the top 10 most beautiful women I've ever seen with my own eyes.

How many have you seen with someone else's eyes? 

[Chino]

Last time I brought my dog to the vet, we saw a new doctor lady. She was a ginger and possibly one of the top 10 most beautiful women I've ever seen with my own eyes.

How many have you seen with someone else's eyes? 

I don't count camera lenses.

[Stadler]

Am I showing my age when I say "what's the bug ficking deal with 'ginger'"?   Isn't that what we were fine calling a 'red head' for the better part of the recorded history of mankind?

Redheads are like any other person: some are hot and some are not.

(Having said that, and not to be crass, but red "carpeting" so to speak is pretty damn sexy).   

[Chino]

Am I showing my age when I say "what's the bug ficking deal with 'ginger'"?   Isn't that what we were fine calling a 'red head' for the better part of the recorded history of mankind?

Redheads are like any other person: some are hot and some are not.
 

But they are getting phased out of the human genome and sightings are becoming more infrequent with each passing generation!

[cramx3]

Am I showing my age when I say "what's the bug ficking deal with 'ginger'"?   Isn't that what we were fine calling a 'red head' for the better part of the recorded history of mankind?

Redheads are like any other person: some are hot and some are not.

(Having said that, and not to be crass, but red "carpeting" so to speak is pretty damn sexy).   

I find most gingers unattractive honestly, but the ones that are attractive usually are really hot.  Maybe because like Chino said, it's a bit more rare.  And I thought the difference between ginger and red head is that a red head just has red hair where as a ginger also has all the freckles.  Which is usually the case for red heads, but not all.

[Stadler]

I find most gingers unattractive honestly, but the ones that are attractive usually are really hot. 

I will agree with this.

[Prog Snob]

The date went extremely well last night. We did the pre-date thing to see if things felt comfortable before going somewhere, so we met at Starbucks and bs'd for a while. I asked her if she felt like getting something to eat, to which she happily obliged. We went to Miller's Ale House and talked for hours without a moment of that awkward silence. Our pasts are very similar in regards to relationships. We're working on another date. We both want to see The Huntsman when it comes out so we're working on an evening that works for the both of us. I'm sure we'll see each other between now and then and meet for coffee or something but so far things are looking good.

[KevShmev]

I find most gingers unattractive honestly, but the ones that are attractive usually are really hot. 

I will agree with this.

Me too. 

[Chino]

The date went extremely well last night. We did the pre-date thing to see if things felt comfortable before going somewhere, so we met at Starbucks and bs'd for a while. I asked her if she felt like getting something to eat, to which she happily obliged. We went to Miller's Ale House and talked for hours without a moment of that awkward silence. Our pasts are very similar in regards to relationships. We're working on another date. We both want to see The Huntsman when it comes out so we're working on an evening that works for the both of us. I'm sure we'll see each other between now and then and meet for coffee or something but so far things are looking good.

"meet for coffee" 

[Prog Snob]

The date went extremely well last night. We did the pre-date thing to see if things felt comfortable before going somewhere, so we met at Starbucks and bs'd for a while. I asked her if she felt like getting something to eat, to which she happily obliged. We went to Miller's Ale House and talked for hours without a moment of that awkward silence. Our pasts are very similar in regards to relationships. We're working on another date. We both want to see The Huntsman when it comes out so we're working on an evening that works for the both of us. I'm sure we'll see each other between now and then and meet for coffee or something but so far things are looking good.

"meet for coffee" 

 

It really does mean that. Neither of us are looking to rush into anything. Last night ended with quick kiss and I'm fine with that. I know what she's been through in the past and I don't want to force anything on her. I know what she wants and I know I can give it to her, but we are both aware that trusting people is not the easiest thing to do for us. We both agreed that we want things to happen naturally so we're able to better see what goes right and wrong. In the past I might have been disappointed with just a quick kiss and a goodnight but this girl is one of the good ones and I don't want to let her slip through my fingers. I can't live like I have in the past, ignoring my instincts. It only got me into trouble. Following my instincts has never led me astray and right now I have a really great feeling about her.

[cramx3]

The date went extremely well last night. We did the pre-date thing to see if things felt comfortable before going somewhere, so we met at Starbucks and bs'd for a while. I asked her if she felt like getting something to eat, to which she happily obliged. We went to Miller's Ale House and talked for hours without a moment of that awkward silence. Our pasts are very similar in regards to relationships. We're working on another date. We both want to see The Huntsman when it comes out so we're working on an evening that works for the both of us. I'm sure we'll see each other between now and then and meet for coffee or something but so far things are looking good.

"meet for coffee" 

 

It really does mean that. Neither of us are looking to rush into anything. Last night ended with quick kiss and I'm fine with that. I know what she's been through in the past and I don't want to force anything on her. I know what she wants and I know I can give it to her, but we are both aware that trusting people is not the easiest thing to do for us. We both agreed that we want things to happen naturally so we're able to better see what goes right and wrong. In the past I might have been disappointed with just a quick kiss and a goodnight but this girl is one of the good ones and I don't want to let her slip through my fingers. I can't live like I have in the past, ignoring my instincts. It only got me into trouble. Following my instincts has never led me astray and right now I have a really great feeling about her.

I feel the same way, when you really are into a girl then I have no problem with taking time and not rushing into banging immediately.  Good stuff Prog, sounds like you may have met a great girl.

[Prog Snob]

I truly feel like I have.

[JayOctavarium]

I missed all the ginger talk.

My ginger wasn't just getting hit on by everyone... shit was also getting hit by everyone.


she cheated

[Harmony]

Regarding the term "ginger" I was once openly admonished for using it.  I was told it is like saying the n-word and whatever board I was one said it was considered a slur.  I'm pretty sure this was a UK music board of some sort.  I seem to recall someone else there being berated for using the term "spaz" as well.

Maybe it is a regional thing?  I just know that I don't use that term any longer for fear of being thought of as a bigot. 

[JayOctavarium]

I love Red Heads so I don't use it as a negative thing. I'm sure there are people who are offended by it.

[cramx3]

I'm sure there are people who are offended by it.

I think the south park episode about gingers lead to a lot more ginger jokes and the term became more popular and since it was associated with the jokes, some people found it offensive.  I never really thought of it as offensive, but it is clearly a label for a certain type of look and any name for that will lead to people finding it offensive. 

[JayOctavarium]

I started using tit more when I started seeing referring to dyed "Red Heads" as Red Heads more than Natural Reds.

[Prog Snob]

I love using tits more.

[cramx3]

I love using tits more.

 

[JayOctavarium]

it*


lmao

[sylvan]

I finally got a chance to hangout with my potential FWB. I met her and her friend at her house and we smoked for a while before her friend left and we got to hangout alone. I feel like such a pussy! I don't know why I can't get out of my own head, even when I'm sitting alone with a cool chick that I've been talking to about all sorts of sexual shit. She seemed a little quiet, so I was having a hard time reading her. But she was telling me not to have overthink things. I think that was my window, but my anxiety got the better of me, AGAIN. It's weird becuase I've never progressed any relationship in this way. She said she'd like to hangout tonight, but I haven't heard back from her today. I hope I get another chance.

I've also been talking to another woman. Totally cool personality, I'm just not sure how many overlapping interests we have. But she keeps making comments like "sexy" and things like that. She initiated contact online, and I'm not totally sure what she's looking for. I don't have the energy or passion to put into something serious right now, so I think I might just have to bring it up somehow.

[cramx3]

I finally got a chance to hangout with my potential FWB. I met her and her friend at her house and we smoked for a while before her friend left and we got to hangout alone. I feel like such a pussy! I don't know why I can't get out of my own head, even when I'm sitting alone with a cool chick that I've been talking to about all sorts of sexual shit. She seemed a little quiet, so I was having a hard time reading her. But she was telling me not to have overthink things. I think that was my window, but my anxiety got the better of me, AGAIN. It's weird becuase I've never progressed any relationship in this way. She said she'd like to hangout tonight, but I haven't heard back from her today. I hope I get another chance.

I totally bottle up sometimes myself.  Just got to feel confident in yourself to make the move. Hopefully she likes you and gives you that second chance.

[Stadler]

I finally got a chance to hangout with my potential FWB. I met her and her friend at her house and we smoked for a while before her friend left and we got to hangout alone. I feel like such a pussy! I don't know why I can't get out of my own head, even when I'm sitting alone with a cool chick that I've been talking to about all sorts of sexual shit. She seemed a little quiet, so I was having a hard time reading her. But she was telling me not to have overthink things. I think that was my window, but my anxiety got the better of me, AGAIN. It's weird becuase I've never progressed any relationship in this way. She said she'd like to hangout tonight, but I haven't heard back from her today. I hope I get another chance.

I've never been very good with the "friends with benefits" scheme, but I do know this:  the few times I have been involved in that kind of thing, it is a DIRECT CAUSATION:  the more I thought about it, the less successful it was. 

I will say this:  If you've already talked this through somewhat, and she's actively telling you not to over think things, then that's all you really have to "read", isn't it?   

[JayOctavarium]

Well this has been an interesting morning.

There's this girl who works as a caregiver for a resident at my work. She's really sweet, and I'll admit she's also fucking beautiful. Like... holy shit drop dead gorgeous head turning beautiful (IMO).   She comes in through the gate every day and we chit chat / flirt for a few before she heads in.  Never anything serious because she is was married.

This morning she pulled up and made a comment on how she was Facebook stalking an ex of hers, and somehow I came up on her "People you may know" list. So she let curiosity get the best of her and did a little looking on my profile. Said something about my friends and I being metalheads (not in a bad way) and mentioned how a friend of mine, who works here now, used to have long hair and it looked awesome. She then told me to tell Aaron, another friend of mine (who was in the photos) Hi for her.

Ok... weird

So I message Aaron and ask him how he knew her.

He goes "Oh. I went to High School with her!"

Then he says "She also dated [my brother] for a while."


WTF

So I send my older brother a text and asked him about her. He called me an hour later and confirmed they dated and yadda yadda. He also said she's really sweet yadda yadda and things end heated between the 2 of them but nothing horrible. He then said if I had any interest, to go for it.

Lol wut



So... I stopped her as she was coming through my gate and bluntly said "So... you dated my brother so and so?


She turned bright red... "You're so and so's brother??!?!? NO... That is NOT possible! How.. NO.. this isn't happening.."

And we chit chatted about my brother for a few and she asked about my mother and what not. (Mind you this is an abridged version) and she mentioned how she wants to go back to pretending like we don't know eachother (in this sense).

I then told her that it's ok... I only have another week or so here and then I am gone. She told me that that's actually really depressing, and she's going to add me on FB and wants to get together for coffee.




...


What... just happened?   

[cramx3]

Maybe ask your brother what just happened? 

[JayOctavarium]

I don't know if I should.

[Sacul]

Just passing by to say this heart isn't lonely anymore