Author Topic: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip (Read 283429 times)

cramx3 · « **Reply #1750 on:** March 22, 2016, 02:27:54 PM »

Quote from: JayOctavarium on March 22, 2016, 02:14:56 PM

I don't have to worry. Let's just say my current whatever we are's best friend is my ex's cousin, whom lived with us for a while. I've known her for almost 10 years. One day she came up to me out of the blue and told me she is sick of hearing about how large I was.

I should have responded with "Wanna see for yourself?"

should haves

bout to crash · « **Reply #1751 on:** March 22, 2016, 07:43:42 PM »

Quote from: Chino on March 22, 2016, 01:48:50 PM

When I would enter a new girl for the first time, I wouldn't let her see my dick prior to putting it in her first. I'd kind of just take control and guide the situation such that she'd end up on her back and I'd inevitably drive into her. Once I got in there and did my thing, any initial size judgments based on vision were already negated by the mind-numbing penetration.

So no foreplay involving your penis? What about putting a condom on? Would you turn your back to her??

King Postwhore · « **Reply #1752 on:** March 22, 2016, 07:48:26 PM »

Then he'd turn around and hide his girth with a big red bow and scream, "I have a love gift for you".

sylvan · « **Reply #1753 on:** March 22, 2016, 08:52:32 PM »

Maybe he just has a condom on all the time because he's always pre-coitus.

bout to crash · « **Reply #1754 on:** March 22, 2016, 10:07:39 PM »

I like king's option better, but both possibilities.

Chino · « **Reply #1755 on:** March 23, 2016, 07:02:00 AM »

Quote from: bout to crash on March 22, 2016, 07:43:42 PM

Quote from: Chino on March 22, 2016, 01:48:50 PM
When I would enter a new girl for the first time, I wouldn't let her see my dick prior to putting it in her first. I'd kind of just take control and guide the situation such that she'd end up on her back and I'd inevitably drive into her. Once I got in there and did my thing, any initial size judgments based on vision were already negated by the mind-numbing penetration.

So no foreplay involving your penis? What about putting a condom on? Would you turn your back to her??

Not really. Any foreplay with my dick would come in the form of aggressive grabbing while my jeans were still on. I didn't use my method to just hide the size of my package. I'm completely average in length, and my girth has challenged some girls, but either way, porn can be very discouraging, especially if you're in your early twenties and haven't been around the block that many times yet. I'd also forego the foreplay, mainly during the first hookup, because I like taking control of the situation and making it all about her. As far as the condom goes, I'd have them on standby and slip one on while I was eating her out or something.

Also, and I'm sorry if this sounds like a dick move, but not getting the foreplay before intercourse would hook me up later on in the session. I found that if I deprived the girl of pleasing me in any way prior to entering her, she was usually down to reciprocate before we were through, especially if she's starting to get worn out in her region. I much prefer cumming in a girl's mouth or on her chest (can't do the face, I feel bad about it), and if I get the blowjob toward the end of sex rather than in the beginning, that's much more likely to happen. I find that typically a girl will give head one time during sex, maybe twice if you're lucky, so I like to save it. Endurance comes into play here too. Getting head gets me off way more than fucking. If I get head first, I'm not lasting all that long once inside you. If a girl lets me in first, I can go a lot longer, and the she can end it pretty much on command whenever she wants by putting my dick in her mouth.

Stadler · « **Reply #1756 on:** March 23, 2016, 10:03:44 AM »

Quote from: kingshmegland on March 22, 2016, 07:48:26 PM

Then he'd turn around and hide his girth with a big red bow and scream, "I have a love gift for you".

One, cut a hole in a box
Two, put your junk in that box
Three, make her open the box
And that's the way you do it

sylvan · « **Reply #1757 on:** March 23, 2016, 10:10:13 AM »

Quote from: cramx3 on March 22, 2016, 01:43:26 PM

Quote from: JayOctavarium on March 22, 2016, 01:26:05 PM
I was going to make a comment about my penis but I believe it would have been highly inappropriate.

This thread is already highly inappropriate.

And we just keep going further down the rabbit hole.

BlobVanDam · « **Reply #1758 on:** March 23, 2016, 10:14:38 AM »

Quote from: sylvan on March 23, 2016, 10:10:13 AM

Quote from: cramx3 on March 22, 2016, 01:43:26 PM
Quote from: JayOctavarium on March 22, 2016, 01:26:05 PM
I was going to make a comment about my penis but I believe it would have been highly inappropriate.

This thread is already highly inappropriate.

And we just keep going further down the rabbit hole.

Speaking of going further into the rabbit's hole, that reminds me of a story appropriate for this thread. So, I used to have a rabbit named Bugs Bunny (original, right?), and you remember how Bugs Bunny often used to dress as a girl and looked pretty good? Well one night I was drunk, and that got me thinking......

Ok, maybe this story isn't helping.

TioJorge · « **Reply #1759 on:** March 23, 2016, 03:31:58 PM »

BB, it's helping. Just go into more detail, talk a little slower and look me in the eyes when you say it.

bout to crash · « **Reply #1760 on:** March 23, 2016, 09:19:14 PM »

Mmmm yeah

Sooo Vermont cancelled on me Saturday which I think I mentioned, and said he didn't have much going on after a work trip this week. He was supposed to return today but a blizzard happened and now he's coming back tomorrow, but he's yet to respond to the text from days ago where I proposed that we hang out Saturday. I don't want to ask again but I want to know if I should make other plans. It's just annoying because he's great in person but not much of a texter and I'm often waiting a long time to hear back/don't get a whole lot. *shrug*... could be worse as far as problems go. But I end up second guessing myself and whether he's into me... until he indicates that he is in some way (i.e. telling me he got a boner on the bus thinking about me

). And then the overthinking part of my brain wonders oh gawd, what if that's some head game he likes to play? Like, make the person sweat just enough and then reel them back in. But I know most people aren't assholes like that......right??

Prog Snob · « **Reply #1761 on:** March 24, 2016, 05:39:12 AM »

I let another one slip away. I think it's time for me to just stop. I guess I'm just not ready, or maybe I'm not being picky enough.

cramx3 · « **Reply #1762 on:** March 24, 2016, 05:46:53 AM »

Quote from: bout to crash on March 23, 2016, 09:19:14 PM

Sooo Vermont cancelled on me Saturday which I think I mentioned, and said he didn't have much going on after a work trip this week. He was supposed to return today but a blizzard happened and now he's coming back tomorrow, but he's yet to respond to the text from days ago where I proposed that we hang out Saturday. I don't want to ask again but I want to know if I should make other plans. It's just annoying because he's great in person but not much of a texter and I'm often waiting a long time to hear back/don't get a whole lot. *shrug*... could be worse as far as problems go. But I end up second guessing myself and whether he's into me... until he indicates that he is in some way (i.e. telling me he got a boner on the bus thinking about me ). And then the overthinking part of my brain wonders oh gawd, what if that's some head game he likes to play? Like, make the person sweat just enough and then reel them back in. But I know most people aren't assholes like that......right??

Boners riding the bus! Reminds me of my childhood going to school in the morning.

Just text him back about Saturday and say you only bring it up because you have other plans that are on hold since you'd rather spend the time with him before committing to something else. This way you can ease your mind.

Quote from: Prog Snob on March 24, 2016, 05:39:12 AM

I let another one slip away. I think it's time for me to just stop. I guess I'm just not ready, or maybe I'm not being picky enough.

Maybe it is time to take a little break, at least from the online game. That stuff I feel like can fuck with your head after awhile. Try doing something different with your time, not sure what, but something to take your mind off trying to find a girl and then maybe one just falls into your lap.

Prog Snob · « **Reply #1763 on:** March 24, 2016, 05:49:10 AM »

That's what I need to do. I'll try to be more reactive instead. I'll focus on studying since I start school in a couple of weeks.

cramx3 · « **Reply #1764 on:** March 24, 2016, 05:57:05 AM »

I spent last night with TinderSuccess. We both now have tooth brushes at each other's place. My coworker says that's a sign of the R word. We haven't talked about that at all. It's just my own insecurities acting up and I'm not saying I am going to end it or anything, but I definitely feel a bit nervous now. We get along really well and she starts her new job on Monday (she had been "funemployed" since meeting) so this will also change dynamics a bit. I'm also headed back to Colorado soon for a week so we may only hang out one more time in the next few weeks which may put a test to this.

Prog Snob · « **Reply #1765 on:** March 24, 2016, 06:02:50 AM »

I suppose that will be the ultimate test. Will distance make the heart grow fonder or will each of you realize it's all frivolity?

cramx3 · « **Reply #1766 on:** March 24, 2016, 06:20:12 AM »

Quote from: Prog Snob on March 24, 2016, 06:02:50 AM

I suppose that will be the ultimate test. Will distance make the heart grow fonder or will each of you realize it's all frivolity?

Yup, we shall see.

sylvan · « **Reply #1767 on:** March 24, 2016, 06:51:18 AM »

I've started talking to someone ~3 weeks ago. First weekend she had plans, second weekend I was out of town. So we talked about holding out until the next weekend I was back, which is this coming weekend. I texted with her a little on Sat, and then texted her from the airport on Mon when I was waiting for my flight. I never heard anything. I texted her last night to say I was looking at what's going on this weekend and if she's still up for going out. Again, no reply. I try not be negative about this stuff, but it feels like it might not happen. It's all kinda weird. We started chatting a little, she seemed nice and attractive, so I asked her to do something. She agreed, even though the schedule was uncertain. She gave me her number. I've just never gotten her to actually converse or carry on some sort of conversation. Or even really give me an idea of what her personality is like or what interests her. Because of those things, I'm not exactly invested in this, but it's still a bummer. I'll try one last time and see what happens.

bout to crash · « **Reply #1768 on:** March 24, 2016, 08:17:31 AM »

That is kinda lame. Even if she is super busy, she can at least make time to text you at least once in a few days. I wouldn't hold my breath at this point if I were you, unfortunately.

Cram, toothbrushes?! That's serious shit! But there is also a bit of distance so it's reasonable to have sleepovers. I wouldn't overthink it, though. (And we should totally have a beer again when you're in CO!)

You're right, that's a good way to approach texting Vermont. I know he had an early morning flight back (and I heard getting to/from the airport has been a huge cluster due to the blizzard) so I'll wait til later today to try him.

Stadler · « **Reply #1769 on:** March 24, 2016, 08:21:24 AM »

Quote from: cramx3 on March 24, 2016, 05:57:05 AM

I spent last night with TinderSuccess. We both now have tooth brushes at each other's place. My coworker says that's a sign of the R word. We haven't talked about that at all. It's just my own insecurities acting up and I'm not saying I am going to end it or anything, but I definitely feel a bit nervous now. We get along really well and she starts her new job on Monday (she had been "funemployed" since meeting) so this will also change dynamics a bit. I'm also headed back to Colorado soon for a week so we may only hang out one more time in the next few weeks which may put a test to this.

Honestly? Stop listening to co-workers and us boobs. Well, except me.

If you're having fun, and enjoying her company, "where you have a toothbrush" means absolutely NOTHING. I went through this with my now-wife, where you're sort of transitioning from "this chick I met on Tinder" to "the person I spend my time with" and it's hard, but at the very least, let it be YOUR assessment, not some douche that's looking to score a good laugh at the water cooler.

cramx3 · « **Reply #1770 on:** March 24, 2016, 08:37:43 AM »

he isn't a douchebag and he is actually really close to me and knows all about my dating life (we work ALOT together and have for a really long time), but I know what you mean and I had thought about it before he said anything, but when he said it is kind of when it hit me a little harder because someone else noticed how close I am getting to her.

Stadler · « **Reply #1771 on:** March 24, 2016, 10:32:47 AM »

Quote from: cramx3 on March 24, 2016, 08:37:43 AM

he isn't a douchebag and he is actually really close to me and knows all about my dating life (we work ALOT together and have for a really long time), but I know what you mean and I had thought about it before he said anything, but when he said it is kind of when it hit me a little harder because someone else noticed how close I am getting to her.

But that's my point: who cares? Isn't that the "beauty" of "love"? Do you know the Genesis song, "Silver Rainbow"? If you don't, listen to it. Yeah, maybe if your heroin habit is now three times what it was, you need an outside source to tell you to "reign it in, Clapton", but if you are just doing what feels right and it's not something you notice, isn't that kind of what we're all looking for on those sites to begin with?

My opinion only, but something to think about.

cramx3 · « **Reply #1772 on:** March 24, 2016, 10:38:17 AM »

Quote from: Stadler on March 24, 2016, 10:32:47 AM

Quote from: cramx3 on March 24, 2016, 08:37:43 AM
he isn't a douchebag and he is actually really close to me and knows all about my dating life (we work ALOT together and have for a really long time), but I know what you mean and I had thought about it before he said anything, but when he said it is kind of when it hit me a little harder because someone else noticed how close I am getting to her.

But that's my point: who cares? Isn't that the "beauty" of "love"? Do you know the Genesis song, "Silver Rainbow"? If you don't, listen to it. Yeah, maybe if your heroin habit is now three times what it was, you need an outside source to tell you to "reign it in, Clapton", but if you are just doing what feels right and it's not something you notice, isn't that kind of what we're all looking for on those sites to begin with?

My opinion only, but something to think about.

Went from the R word to the L word quickly

bout to crash · « **Reply #1773 on:** March 24, 2016, 05:29:50 PM »

It often does

I texted Vermont asking about this weekend but haven't heard back yet. He may be on a plane because I was responding to a text from a few hours ago (him saying he was hoping to be home tonight)... but I did say that I got another invite and was trying to figure out my plans, so we shall see.

Meanwhile some other dude on OKC messaged me a week ot two ago and we've been talking back and forth. He was all eager to hang and I finally found some time (I'll be sort of near him for an art opening tonight). He was all about it at first and now apparently he only has an hour, so I'm supposed to text him when I get there so he can meet me for an hour. Seems kind of weird. I told him he didn't need to rush it and come just for an hour but he's insisting on it, so whatever. I'm just glad I'm not putting any extra effort into this hangout, tbh

Adami · « **Reply #1774 on:** March 24, 2016, 05:58:46 PM »

Quote from: bout to crash on March 24, 2016, 05:29:50 PM

I texted Vermont asking about this weekend but haven't heard back yet. He may be on a plane because I was responding to a text from a few hours ago (him saying he was hoping to be home tonight)... but I did say that I got another invite and was trying to figure out my plans, so we shall see.

Quote from: bout to crash on March 24, 2016, 08:17:31 AM

That is kinda lame. Even if she is super busy, she can at least make time to text you at least once in a few days. I wouldn't hold my breath at this point if I were you, unfortunately.

Have you considered taking a lucky guy on a romantic trip to Vegas?

Stadler · « **Reply #1775 on:** March 24, 2016, 08:04:02 PM »

Quote from: cramx3 on March 24, 2016, 10:38:17 AM

Quote from: Stadler on March 24, 2016, 10:32:47 AM
Quote from: cramx3 on March 24, 2016, 08:37:43 AM
he isn't a douchebag and he is actually really close to me and knows all about my dating life (we work ALOT together and have for a really long time), but I know what you mean and I had thought about it before he said anything, but when he said it is kind of when it hit me a little harder because someone else noticed how close I am getting to her.

But that's my point: who cares? Isn't that the "beauty" of "love"? Do you know the Genesis song, "Silver Rainbow"? If you don't, listen to it. Yeah, maybe if your heroin habit is now three times what it was, you need an outside source to tell you to "reign it in, Clapton", but if you are just doing what feels right and it's not something you notice, isn't that kind of what we're all looking for on those sites to begin with?

My opinion only, but something to think about.

Went from the R word to the L word quickly

I think I've already said I consider you married.

HAHAHAHA.

sylvan · « **Reply #1776 on:** March 25, 2016, 06:39:55 AM »

Quote from: bout to crash on March 24, 2016, 08:17:31 AM

That is kinda lame. Even if she is super busy, she can at least make time to text you at least once in a few days. I wouldn't hold my breath at this point if I were you, unfortunately.

I texted her again last night and she said she was sorry and she might have signed up for the online dating thing too early. She's done with school in May, but it is apparently consuming her life. I told her we should still chat sometimes and get to know each other, and I'll reach out again, but I'm totally not invested anymore. If she wants to talk, cool. If not, whatevs.

Did you ever hear from Vermont? What happened with OKC dude? That's an odd way to meet someone for the first time.

Prog Snob · « **Reply #1777 on:** March 25, 2016, 06:54:27 AM »

The last girl I had started talking to just threw me a curve ball. She seemed like a nice girl so I hoped it would lead to something. I know she has a son and is going to school, so I asked if she was living with just her son or with family also. She said she was living with her son and her son's father.

The next thing I asked is what she was looking for in a relationship. She hasn't responded since last night.

cramx3 · « **Reply #1778 on:** March 25, 2016, 07:36:17 AM »

Quote from: Prog Snob on March 25, 2016, 06:54:27 AM

The last girl I had started talking to just threw me a curve ball. She seemed like a nice girl so I hoped it would lead to something. I know she has a son and is going to school, so I asked if she was living with just her son or with family also. She said she was living with her son and her son's father. The next thing I asked is what she was looking for in a relationship. She hasn't responded since last night.

Yikes. I'd stay away even if she does respond.

bout to crash · « **Reply #1779 on:** March 25, 2016, 08:45:22 AM »

Yeah that's a bit weird.

OKC guy was cool, we talked for about an hour at my friend's art show. He apparently books himself up so much that's all he had time for. He said it was his second "date" of the day and he had dinner plans with a friend later, and he already had five dates from OKC this week. He says he's "playing the OKC game" rather than look for a mono relationship though he doesn't really consider himself polyamorous, just a "bachelor" trying to see lots of people. Gawd, he was cool but the more I write about him the more dickish he sounds

It was a good conversation though, and he was cute (super short, but the height diference didnt seem to bother him). He said he's just looking for people to hang out occasionally, and won't be free again til week after next because he's leaving town, so will hit me up when he gets back to town. I have a feeling by then I will have forgotten he exists, tbh.

As for Vermont, I got nothing. Despite Adami's wiseass response, as much as he sucks about texting he doesn't usually leave questions unanswered. He didn't seem to know when he was getting back from Dallas because he had been stuck there, so maybe I shouldn't have asked when he was probably super stressed out. Personally, I tend to "table" messages that aren't urgent when I'm busy and then forget about them. We shall see. I'm not planning on seeing him tomorrow at this point, obviously.

cramx3 · « **Reply #1780 on:** March 25, 2016, 08:56:43 AM »

Quote from: bout to crash on March 25, 2016, 08:45:22 AM

OKC guy was cool, we talked for about an hour at my friend's art show. He apparently books himself up so much that's all he had time for. He said it was his second "date" of the day and he had dinner plans with a friend later, and he already had five dates from OKC this week. He says he's "playing the OKC game" rather than look for a mono relationship though he doesn't really consider himself polyamorous, just a "bachelor" trying to see lots of people. Gawd, he was cool but the more I write about him the more dickish he sounds
It was a good conversation though, and he was cute (super short, but the height diference didnt seem to bother him). He said he's just looking for people to hang out occasionally, and won't be free again til week after next because he's leaving town, so will hit me up when he gets back to town. I have a feeling by then I will have forgotten he exists, tbh.

Interesting that he was so honest about all that, that's cool, but I can see why you'd not put much into that type of situation.

Prog Snob · « **Reply #1781 on:** March 25, 2016, 12:34:31 PM »

So I figured she wouldn't respond when I asked what she was looking for, but she did in one concise word.

Sex.

cramx3 · « **Reply #1782 on:** March 25, 2016, 12:39:24 PM »

I'd still stay away personally. That scenario just seems like it's asking for problems.

Prog Snob · « **Reply #1783 on:** March 25, 2016, 12:49:08 PM »

I haven't fully decided on that yet. It has been a while so maybe just to release the poison.

In other news, some woman put her blood type in her OKCupid profile because she usually gets along better with certain blood types.

cramx3 · « **Reply #1784 on:** March 25, 2016, 12:53:58 PM »

Quote from: Prog Snob on March 25, 2016, 12:49:08 PM

I haven't fully decided on that yet. It has been a while so maybe just to release the poison.

In other news, some woman put her blood type in her OKCupid profile because she usually gets along better with certain blood types.

Yea, I mean I get that too so if you think its a legit NSA option then what the hell

and...

people are so odd sometimes (including myself)

News: The staff at DTF wish to remind you all that a firm grasp of the rules of Yahtzee can save your life and the lives of your loved ones. Be safe out there.

Author Topic: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip (Read 283429 times)