Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip

[Adami]

I'll come clean. I've been single since the end of Jan. Been on a few OKC dates, but didn't care for any of them.

Honestly just waiting for Prog to finally make his move and sweep me off my feet. Guess I'll be waiting a while

[Prog Snob]

[MetalJunkie]

I'll come clean. I've been single since the end of Jan. Been on a few OKC dates, but didn't care for any of them.

Why the hell would you take a date to Oklahoma City?

[Adami]

I'll come clean. I've been single since the end of Jan. Been on a few OKC dates, but didn't care for any of them.

Why the hell would you take a date to Oklahoma City?

You're right, it was a terrible choice. No wonder they all bombed.





.........too soon?

[Lynxo]

I'll come clean. I've been single since the end of Jan. Been on a few OKC dates, but didn't care for any of them.

Why the hell would you take a date to Oklahoma City?

Yeah, I hear the girls from there aren't too great.

I've been single for over a year now and the few dates I've gone on this year haven't end well.
- One girl I went to three dates with and had sex with twice but she suddenly tells me she wants to stop dating guys for a while and then proceeded to block me.
- One girl I had an awesome date with where we talked for over six hours but after meeting a second time, she tells me she isn't ready to date yet

And there's a few I've talked with but nothing that really feels that special. I have to say, I really miss a relationsship right now.

[cramx3]

I cancelled the date for last night and tonight.

Why?  Thought you had something good going with one of them?

I'll come clean. I've been single since the end of Jan. Been on a few OKC dates, but didn't care for any of them.

Why the hell would you take a date to Oklahoma City?

You're right, it was a terrible choice. No wonder they all bombed.





.........too soon?

 

I'll come clean. I've been single since the end of Jan. Been on a few OKC dates, but didn't care for any of them.

Why the hell would you take a date to Oklahoma City?

Yeah, I hear the girls from there aren't too great.

I've been single for over a year now and the few dates I've gone on this year haven't end well.
- One girl I went to three dates with and had sex with twice but she suddenly tells me she wants to stop dating guys for a while and then proceeded to block me.
- One girl I had an awesome date with where we talked for over six hours but after meeting a second time, she tells me she isn't ready to date yet

And there's a few I've talked with but nothing that really feels that special. I have to say, I really miss a relationsship right now.

I'm starting to wonder if a large portion of the population just has no interest in anything more serious than hook ups anymore.  I'm including myself in this as I feel every day that passes I feel less inclined to ever be serious with someone again. 

I'm getting frustrated with the girl I met last week.  She was a bit difficult to schedule the date last week as I was off last Tuesday so told her I'd come up near her to make it easy for her and she gave me some issues with timing and location, but eventually we agreed and we met and it was fine.  This week we agreed to do Margaritas and Mexican food at a popular spot on Tuesday night.  She cancelled Monday evening saying work was hammering her and she wouldn't be able to come out Tuesday night so she pushed it to tonight.  This morning I ask if we are on, she says yes... then 15 minutes later says she doesn't want to do what we agreed on because there will be a wait and doesn't want to wait until 830 (total exaggeration) to get seated.  Maybe it's not much, but I'm annoyed now.  She waits until after the cancellation and reschedule confirmation to then say she wants to change location because there will be a wait?  That was the point of the margaritas! Which she said she was excited for!  And like we can't just chill and talk while we wait and get to know each other?  I asked her if she had any suggestions then since she blew my plan up, now twice for the same date.  If she doesn't have a suggestion I am going to walk away.  It's too early in getting to know someone to be this difficult and I don't like bending over for people who haven't earned that.

[Prog Snob]

I cancelled the date for last night and tonight.

Why?  Thought you had something good going with one of them?

Grumble, grumble. I really don't know why I cancelled the date. I had a gut feeling and I went with it. My guy never steers me wrong. There is still one left that I'd like to get together with so we'll see. I've just become exhaustingly picky.

[Chino]

I'm starting to wonder if a large portion of the population just has no interest in anything more serious than hook ups anymore.  I'm including myself in this as I feel every day that passes I feel less inclined to ever be serious with someone again. 

I don't think it's that people are only interested in hooking up, it's just that there is no rush to get married or settle down anymore. Back in the day, being all sex deprived and whatnot, people were eager to get into a serious relationship in order to bang without spending eternity in a fire pit. Also, people are living longer. If there's a chance you're going to live until 90 or 100 years old, why try to settle down at 25?

I'm conflicted with this a lot, honestly. I love my girlfriend to death. There's no one else I'd rather share my life with and I've been looking at rings recently. That being said, the idea that I may never enjoy the 'hunt' again kind of bums me out. Our sex life is fantastic, but there's a hell of a rush you get (at least there is with me) when a girl lets you in for the first time, especially if you've been working at it for a while. It's fun, it's exciting, and it's satisfying urges deep within us that have been being programmed for millions of years.

I completely understand why people are not interested in anything other than hooking up at our age. If for any reason my girlfriend and I were to break up, I would have no interest in real dating/building a life with someone else for several years. I'd just try to get as much as I could as often as I could.

[NunoTenniscourt]

It's been 2 years since my last relationship ended, and not a single fiber of my being is longing for another one. I am perfectly happy and content with
having fun with women who aren't wanting a relationship, either. (they do exist)

[cramx3]

I'm starting to wonder if a large portion of the population just has no interest in anything more serious than hook ups anymore.  I'm including myself in this as I feel every day that passes I feel less inclined to ever be serious with someone again. 

I don't think it's that people are only interested in hooking up, it's just that there is no rush to get married or settle down anymore. Back in the day, being all sex deprived and whatnot, people were eager to get into a serious relationship in order to bang without spending eternity in a fire pit. Also, people are living longer. If there's a chance you're going to live until 90 or 100 years old, why try to settle down at 25?

I'm conflicted with this a lot, honestly. I love my girlfriend to death. There's no one else I'd rather share my life with and I've been looking at rings recently. That being said, the idea that I may never enjoy the 'hunt' again kind of bums me out. Our sex life is fantastic, but there's a hell of a rush you get (at least there is with me) when a girl lets you in for the first time, especially if you've been working at it for a while. It's fun, it's exciting, and it's satisfying urges deep within us that have been being programmed for millions of years.

I completely understand why people are not interested in anything other than hooking up at our age. If for any reason my girlfriend and I were to break up, I would have no interest in real dating/building a life with someone else for several years. I'd just try to get as much as I could as often as I could.

A lot of truth to that.

It's been 2 years since my last relationship ended, and not a single fiber of my being is longing for another one. I am perfectly happy and content with
having fun with women who aren't wanting a relationship, either. (they do exist)

also to add, I am perfectly happy where I am as well.  I'm starting to think the idea of a relationship is not interesting or worth it in any way.  My hope for finding "the one" is very slim and the idea that I will be solo till I die is pretty high.  No kids either, I don't see that at all in my life trajectory mostly because I refuse to have a kid with someone I am not married to and have been married for some time as well.

[Stadler]

Dude, Chino, I totally understand where you're coming from.  TOTALLY.   I went through a divorce, hit the dating scene and actually had a fair bit of fun - single, reasonably good looking, reasonable amount of disposable income, reasonable willingness to talk to anyone - but I met a wonderful, beautiful (former beauty pageant winner, no shit, for real) and decided to get married again.   

As with Chino, love her dearly, great sex life, just purely enjoy being in her company, but...   there's an element to the hunt that is just not satisfied. 

But it's not that; that's an element of "monogamy" that has been in play since humankind started putting on pants and perfume.    At the risk of having this sound like "GET OFF MY LAWN!", I think its a combination of "me me me", and it being hard for people to put in the work these days.  We want to know everything about someone, we want to know all their piccadillos and perks, in two dates.   Bang on the second date, find out if she's a freak in the sheets, and move the fuck on if it's not PERFECT for ME.    The "one" doesn't just fall into your lap.   I feel I've met "the one", but it didn't come in a box with a bow on it.  It took effort, work, and desire on both our parts to cultivate it. 

i think some of you think she should have 38Ds, be as cute as my favorite actress, give great head, take it in the can, listen to all my shit and baggage about the previous girl that decimated my heart wrongly, will plan all our dates, respond to all my texts within 15 minutes, let me use Tinder as much as I want, have no prior history with any men, and she should clearly communicate all that to me in a series of texts in a frequency not less than five per day.

No offense to anyone here, and I don't mean any one person here - and I realize I'm not there on any of the dates - but I see people rejecting some promising relationships that might take some time and effort to cultivate over some really trivial shit.   

[cramx3]

My date tonight is on, she finally got back to me saying she wanted to do something closer to me so I picked a spot and we are set for 7pm.  Still kind of confused why she changed plans, but whatever, this is closer to me and easier, I was trying to make it closer to her for her ease and it wasn't out of my way coming home from work.  She said I was being really sweet so maybe some brownie points, who knows, but I will still say this, and yes it's totally a "me" thing, but I really don't like when early in getting to know someone they have issues with stupid things like this.  I will have a beer and forget about it later and enjoy her company hopefully 

[toro]

We want to know everything about someone, we want to know all their piccadillos and perks, in two dates.   Bang on the second date, find out if she's a freak in the sheets, and move the fuck on if it's not PERFECT for ME.    The "one" doesn't just fall into your lap. 
i think some of you think she should have 38Ds, be as cute as my favorite actress, give great head, take it in the can, listen to all my shit and baggage about the previous girl that decimated my heart wrongly, will plan all our dates, respond to all my texts within 15 minutes, let me use Tinder as much as I want, have no prior history with any men, and she should clearly communicate all that to me in a series of texts in a frequency not less than five per day.

No offense to anyone here, and I don't mean any one person here - and I realize I'm not there on any of the dates - but I see people rejecting some promising relationships that might take some time and effort to cultivate over some really trivial shit.

Everything about this is true for a lot of people I know. They want someone, but they don't want to work for it.
It seems like everyone thinks that there is a one, and if something is not like they want, they send it all the hell.
The one doesn't exist, until you make her/him your one. Know what I'm saying?

take it in the can

[cramx3]

Had a nice date last night.  We just went to the bar around the corner from me.  Nice chat and a couple beers and some food.  This girl is really nice and after not being so sure where she stood after the first date, she made it pretty clear during this date that she was interested and even said she wants to do another date and continued to text me a bunch after we left.  Sadly though, I don't think I am really interested.  Nice girl, has a job, has friends.... I just don't think I am physically attracted to her.  I'm willing to do another date just to see what happens since she is a good girl, but I just don't see anything forming here.

[Prog Snob]

What about her appearance dissuades you from continuing to see her?

I started talking to someone new last night. We spoke on the phone for a couple of hours and hit it off pretty well. She's a rocker chick, has an 18 year old son, already knows about my situation, and still wants to get together.

[cramx3]

What about her appearance dissuades you from continuing to see her?

I started talking to someone new last night. We spoke on the phone for a couple of hours and hit it off pretty well. She's a rocker chick, has an 18 year old son, already knows about my situation, and still wants to get together.

Then dont cancel it!

This girls lets just say is curvy and curvy in the spots that I would say are too much for me.  If she looked like her one full body picture I'd be ok, but shes a bit larger which threw me off initially but tried to look past it, but honestly am struggling to look past it now.  I've said before I don't mind larger girls, if they are cool then it's fine, but there is a limit to what I'd find attractive and she is a bit past it. 

Especially since I spent so much time (and still am) trying to get my own body into better shape, I don't think I want to get serious with someone who I feel is opposite of what I am trying to do I guess.  BTW since I wrote that post some months ago about working on myself, I've lost at least 15 lbs and I haven't stopped working on that, I'd like to lose at least 5 more to reach my goal, but maybe another 15 is doable by the end of the year.

[JayOctavarium]

SOoooo


I am still kinda talking to work girl. Just some random texts back and forth. Today marked her first week at her new office. So we chit chatted for a bit via text, and then apparently she got annoyed because I am.. kinda cheesy. The conversation just ended with her saying "Stop".


What?

[Adami]

SOoooo


I am still kinda talking to work girl. Just some random texts back and forth. Today marked her first week at her new office. So we chit chatted for a bit via text, and then apparently she got annoyed because I am.. kinda cheesy. The conversation just ended with her saying "Stop".


What?

That's the best advice. Just stop.

I mean, it's pretty clear you don't want to, but it's a decent idea.

[JayOctavarium]

It's hard to

We have so many common interests. It's hard to find people who think the same way I do. Believe me I am not looking for anything out of it.

[Adami]

Do whatever you want to do man.

I'm just reminded of that scene in Star Trek: Generations when Data is trying alcohol with his emotion chip for the first time.

"Yes...yes.....I HATE this......"
"More?"
"Please"

[JayOctavarium]

[Prog Snob]

So, you mean all it takes to get you to stop talking is to tell you to "stop"? 

[cramx3]

I'd honestly say stop as well. It's only going to hurt you emotionally.  I don't know how serious the "stop" was, if it was by any chance serious, then listen.  I'm guessing it wasn't so serious, but I'm honestly not sure what you are doing unless you are settling on just being friends.

[Prog Snob]

It's difficult to read her emotions over text. This is going to turn into a Seinfeld episode but were there exclamation points? Capital letters? Sometimes someone can stay stop playfully. I promote the use of emoticons to gauge demeanor.

[axeman90210]

It's difficult to read her emotions over text. This is going to turn into a Seinfeld episode but were there exclamation points? Capital letters? Sometimes someone can stay stop playfully. I promote the use of emoticons to gauge demeanor.

Sure she told me to stop, but who can read emotions in a text? So yadda yadda yadda, I got hit with a restraining order.

[Stadler]

Why?  Just why?  Why would you not pull the trigger live and in person, but taunt and tease yourself by texting her?  ESPECIALLY when text is prime to be misconstrued??   Text should be the little cherry on top of the sundae, which is all the wonderful things a healthy, red-blooded male can do to, with, and for a healthy, red-blooded female, IN PERSON. 

I know, I know...  "YOU KIDS!  BACK IN MY DAY..."

You be you, who the fuck am I and why am I even weighing in on this, but from where I'm sitting, this is ALL on you.   You've got no place to complain or play victim if this goes horribly wrong (emotionally) for you.   

[Prog Snob]

It's difficult to read her emotions over text. This is going to turn into a Seinfeld episode but were there exclamation points? Capital letters? Sometimes someone can stay stop playfully. I promote the use of emoticons to gauge demeanor.

Sure she told me to stop, but who can read emotions in a text? So yadda yadda yadda, I got hit with a restraining order.

 

"We went out to eat, I had the bisque, yadda yadda yadda, I never saw him again.":

"You yadda yaddad over the best part!"

"I mentioned the bisque."   

[JayOctavarium]

I love you guys.

[Adami]

I love you guys.

Stop.

[Prog Snob]

[JayOctavarium]

I love you guys.

Stop.

She texted me this morning, out of the blue, and told me I was in a dream she had last night. (non sexual).

[bout to crash]

RUN AWAY

I have a date with a cop next week, guys 

Man, I've missed a lot in this thread. Cram, I can understand where youre coming from. You can't help what you are attracted to in people. And not that Ginger is super overweight or anything, but I am slightly turned off by the fact that she's not at all interested in any kind of exercise or anything like that. Otherwise things are going well with her and the hubby.

Knuckles is on her way over now

[cramx3]

Oooo a cop! I guess that means someone's getting handcuffed 

[bout to crash]

You know, I made a little joke about restraints being sexy (after he told me about something that happened on the job) and he said that most of the fun has been taken out of them because of work, but he'd be willing to try again with the right person

[cramx3]