Going out on a date with a complete stranger.

Started by Chino, August 15, 2013, 05:51:42 AM

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Chino

Quote from: senecadawg2 on August 29, 2013, 12:24:35 PM
Sorry that didn't work out well for you. I'm curious to know what the conversation was about when she decided to cut it off.

We were just talking about how our days were going and she was telling me about this bitch of a patient that just came into the hospital. She sent like three messages (rant) in a row and that was the end of it.

senecadawg2


Anguyen92

Quote from: Chino on August 29, 2013, 11:28:58 AM
Update because Nick demanded it. I have stopped talking to this lady. Pretty shitty how it went down actually. We were literally mid conversation last Thursday and then she just stopped texting. I sent another text a few hours later, and again nothing. Thirty hours had then gone by and I decided to send another one. I think it said something like "So I guess we're done talking now :/ Well, whatever the reason, no hard feelings. I enjoyed meeting you. Have fun catching up on Breaking Bad and good luck this semester". ... To that, still no response.

At this point I am completely baffled, and pretty irritated. I tried to shake it off and made it about four days before it really got under my skin. I like to know if I've fucked up. That way I can correct my actions in the future. Two nights ago, I finally sent something along the lines of "Hey. I told myself I wasn't going to send a follow up text, but I need to. Can you please give a reason why you just randomly stopped texting. You can even lie to me, I won't know the difference. I try to be a decent person, respectful, level-headed and not an asshole, so it worries me when someone I am texting on a daily basis for weeks just suddenly disappears without any indication as to why". The rest of the conversation went as follows...

Girl :  "Hey. I started talking to you literally like a day after I started pursuing a guy at work. I don't like saying goodbye or confrontation, so I just stopped texting"

Me : "So is this the official goodbye then?"

Girl : "Yeah. But it was really great meeting you and talking to you these last couple weeks"

Me : *Deletes conversation*

Damn, that sucks that it ended like that in that particular manner.  It just feels like there's no proper way to react to this in a good manner that makes both of you look good. I was in a similar situation like this and I think I handled it badly though if the other person would have reached out to me in a long and meaningful conversation, I could have moved on very easily, no harm and no foul, but what happened, happened.

So, in the end, I guess there is no way to walk out of this in a winning position, but we just got to keep going and wish them well.  Gl man.

CrimsonSunrise

Yeah... that blows.  Some peeps are just inconsiderate.  Moving right along Bro! Don't give her anymore of your attention or thoughts.

Nel_Annette

Had a girl do that to me freshmen year of college. Hung out for a few weeks, she borrowed a dvd, and then suddenly, boom, she stops texting me, messaging me, whatever. When I saw her on campus, she wouldn't make eye contact or say anything when I said "hi". Never got that dvd back.

I don't get people who do that. People like closure. You don't just leave them hanging. You want to stop knowing them, fine, but at least tell them. That's worse than rejecting them imo.

As for blind dates, fuck'em. I can't stand them. Can't tell you how many times friends have tried to set me up with their friends who are just... awkward. That's the nicest way I can put it without coming off as a "I'm too good for these girls" douchebag.  :lol Let me just say that sometimes, you can easily see the reasons why a person's still single.

HarlequinForest

Quote from: Chino on August 29, 2013, 11:28:58 AM
Update because Nick demanded it. I have stopped talking to this lady. Pretty shitty how it went down actually. We were literally mid conversation last Thursday and then she just stopped texting. I sent another text a few hours later, and again nothing. Thirty hours had then gone by and I decided to send another one. I think it said something like "So I guess we're done talking now :/ Well, whatever the reason, no hard feelings. I enjoyed meeting you. Have fun catching up on Breaking Bad and good luck this semester". ... To that, still no response.

At this point I am completely baffled, and pretty irritated. I tried to shake it off and made it about four days before it really got under my skin. I like to know if I've fucked up. That way I can correct my actions in the future. Two nights ago, I finally sent something along the lines of "Hey. I told myself I wasn't going to send a follow up text, but I need to. Can you please give a reason why you just randomly stopped texting. You can even lie to me, I won't know the difference. I try to be a decent person, respectful, level-headed and not an asshole, so it worries me when someone I am texting on a daily basis for weeks just suddenly disappears without any indication as to why". The rest of the conversation went as follows...

Girl :  "Hey. I started talking to you literally like a day after I started pursuing a guy at work. I don't like saying goodbye or confrontation, so I just stopped texting"

Me : "So is this the official goodbye then?"

Girl : "Yeah. But it was really great meeting you and talking to you these last couple weeks"

Me : *Deletes conversation*

Good job keeping it cool. I would have raged on this bitch. Rustled my jimmies just reading that.

hefdaddy42

That's pretty fucked up, Chino.  Sorry, dude.
Quote from: BlobVanDam on December 11, 2014, 08:19:46 PMHef is right on all things. Except for when I disagree with him. In which case he's probably still right.

King Postwhore

Better to learn this early on though because if this is how she handled thinks this early in dating, imagine in a long relationship.
"I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down'." - Bon Newhart.

ReaperKK

Quote from: Nel on August 31, 2013, 01:42:10 AM
Had a girl do that to me freshmen year of college. Hung out for a few weeks, she borrowed a dvd, and then suddenly, boom, she stops texting me, messaging me, whatever. When I saw her on campus, she wouldn't make eye contact or say anything when I said "hi". Never got that dvd back.

I don't get people who do that. People like closure. You don't just leave them hanging. You want to stop knowing them, fine, but at least tell them. That's worse than rejecting them imo.


I agree but I found the best way to deal with those situations is just to move on as well. If you tried to get closure but you can't well then fuck it. Take everything day by day.

Orbert


Nel_Annette


Dark Castle


Orbert

One of my old girlfriends wanted to borrow my teddy bear for a while.  She really liked him and said it was nice having something that smelled like me, blah blah blah.  Okay fine.  After we broke up, I didn't ask for him back, because I'm so manly and macho that I cannot seem to be worried about a teddy bear.  It did bother me, though.

Eventually, it bugged me enough to where I looked her up and asked her about it.  She'd given him away!  Stupid bitch.  This was years later, but still.  She'd moved out and left all her stuffed animals, except for a few, in her room at home.  One day, her mom was cleaning out her room and asked if she could donate all those stuffed animals to charity.  She told her to go ahead.  She told me that she did remember that my teddy bear was there, but since it had been so long, and I'd never said anything, she figured it was okay.

Shit.  Now that I think about it, it was my own fault.  Oh well, charity.  Hopefully some kid is loving my teddy bear.

ReaperKK

I just wanted to bump this and say thanks to chino I downloaded the tinder app and had a great first date yesterday!

Chino

#119
Nice! I forgot I made this thread. I never updated you guys with part 2 of my experience with it!!

So after that first bitch just completely went MIA, I kept at it. I met a lovely young lady through the app named Victoria. She's two years younger than I. We went out for drinks for our first date (which she paid for!) and hit it off immediately. Everything clicked and she's everything I could ask for in a woman. We've now been officially dating for six weeks or so. Thank you modern technology.

Prog Snob

Quote from: Chino on November 06, 2013, 05:35:26 AM
Nice! I forgot I made this thread. I never updated you guys with part 2 of my experience with it!!

So after that first bitch just completely went MIA, I kept at it. I met a lovely young lady through the app named Victoria. She's two years younger than I. We went out for drinks for our first date and hit it off immediately. Everything clicked and she's everything I could ask for in a woman. We've now been officially dating for six weeks or so. Thank you modern technology.

Excellent! 

ReaperKK

:tup that's awesome to hear Chino.

Yea yesterday was awesome, we spent so long talking at the restaurant that we were asked to leave because they were closing.

Chino

Quote from: ReaperKK on November 06, 2013, 05:48:12 AM
:tup that's awesome to hear Chino.

Yea yesterday was awesome, we spent so long talking at the restaurant that we were asked to leave because they were closing.

After the restaurant closed, did something else open?

:hat

I kid, I kid. Good to hear. I'm glad someone else got positive use out of the app. At this point, when people ask either of us how we met, we just say online. It's a lot easier than trying to explain the cellphone app. I demonstrated the app to this 75 year old lady that came into work, she was absolutely mortified.

senecadawg2

Awesome that it worked better with this Victoria.

Onno


Chino

Quote from: Onno on November 06, 2013, 07:56:07 AM
*insert SFAM Victoria pun*

I play DT every now and then when she's in the car. Never the TOT sounding stuff, but a good variety. She's never asked for me to change it and has said things like "Is this that band, Dream Theater?? ... I like it". We've also sat down and watched the first 6 episodes of Cosmos.


Onno


FlyingBIZKIT

Finding a girl that likes Dream Theater around here is like saying the Star Wars sequels are better than the prequels, you just don't.



Congrats, dude.




bout to crash

Oh man, I missed this thread initially. Lots of lols and  >:( s... can't believe that first girl behaved that way, but glad the second one worked out well!

Quote from: jingle.boy on August 16, 2013, 03:40:07 PM




:rollin

Quote from: Orbert on August 31, 2013, 07:26:12 AM
Yeah, but the DVD
:lol.. That actually happened to me, and I bitched about it so much (it was one of my favorite movies) that the guy I dated after bought me another copy  :hat


Prog Snob


jingle.boy

Nope, it's actually facing the dining room, which is where all the decorations are too.
Quote from: TAC on July 31, 2021, 06:55:07 PMIf I can do it, it's idiot proof.
Quote from: Stadler on January 03, 2024, 09:00:00 AMThat's a word salad - and take it from me, I know word salad
Quote from: hefdaddy42 on November 04, 2021, 05:14:36 AMI fear for the day when something happens on the right that is SO nuts that even Stadler says "That's crazy".

Prog Snob

Quote from: jingle.boy on November 07, 2013, 06:23:35 AM
Nope, it's actually facing the dining room, which is where all the decorations are too.

I know.  I was attempting to be facetious.      :-[

jingle.boy

Quote from: Prog Snob on November 07, 2013, 06:38:00 AM
Quote from: jingle.boy on November 07, 2013, 06:23:35 AM
Nope, it's actually facing the dining room, which is where all the decorations are too.

I know.  I was attempting to be facetious.      :-[

Clearly I missed that!!  :facepalm:
Quote from: TAC on July 31, 2021, 06:55:07 PMIf I can do it, it's idiot proof.
Quote from: Stadler on January 03, 2024, 09:00:00 AMThat's a word salad - and take it from me, I know word salad
Quote from: hefdaddy42 on November 04, 2021, 05:14:36 AMI fear for the day when something happens on the right that is SO nuts that even Stadler says "That's crazy".

Prog Snob

Quote from: jingle.boy on November 07, 2013, 06:40:28 AM
Quote from: Prog Snob on November 07, 2013, 06:38:00 AM
Quote from: jingle.boy on November 07, 2013, 06:23:35 AM
Nope, it's actually facing the dining room, which is where all the decorations are too.

I know.  I was attempting to be facetious.      :-[

Clearly I missed that!!  :facepalm:

And thank you for having a party for me by the way, even though I wasn't there.

jingle.boy

Quote from: Chino on November 06, 2013, 05:35:26 AM
Nice! I forgot I made this thread. I never updated you guys with part 2 of my experience with it!!

So after that first bitch just completely went MIA, I kept at it. I met a lovely young lady through the app named Victoria. She's two years younger than I. We went out for drinks for our first date (which she paid for!) and hit it off immediately. Everything clicked and she's everything I could ask for in a woman. We've now been officially dating for six weeks or so. Thank you modern technology.

And 10 years later, everything all worked out!

I wonder, Kay.... are your posts you meeting your (now) wife?

P.S.  reading thru this thread in it's entirety was such a joy.  Some old-time familiar names there that I miss.
Quote from: TAC on July 31, 2021, 06:55:07 PMIf I can do it, it's idiot proof.
Quote from: Stadler on January 03, 2024, 09:00:00 AMThat's a word salad - and take it from me, I know word salad
Quote from: hefdaddy42 on November 04, 2021, 05:14:36 AMI fear for the day when something happens on the right that is SO nuts that even Stadler says "That's crazy".

Nick

Wow, what a cool blast from the past this thread is!

gmillerdrake

Was reading through the thread since the huge bump.......

Quote from: gmillerdrake on August 15, 2013, 06:20:24 AM
And, my sister in law used an online service and has met a very nice guy who she really likes.

They're married now with three kids

pg1067

#137
Quote from: Chino on August 15, 2013, 05:51:42 AM
Has anyone had experience with something like this in a similar situation? Please discuss.

I'd have been all over this thread had I been here when it was started.  I have countless online dating stories, most of which are from 30 years ago.  The oldest one I can recall was when I got my first computer in July 1993, I got on a bulletin board service called *Prodigy.  I met this woman who was a Ph.D candidate in music at USC, and she and her friend were looking to meet some guys.  One of my roommates and I met them at a local bar/pool hall.  The woman I had been communicating with was absolutely gorgeous.  Tall.  Long legs.  She walked in in a short skirt and heels.  Her friend was also attractive, but I don't remember much about her other than she was dressed somewhat frumpy and was on crutches from a broken foot.  We had a great time.  She explained that she was Croatian.  She didn't have an accent, but she said that she sometimes paused to "translate" between English and Croatian.  She also told me that the bass player in Nirvana was her cousin.  Unfortunately, while we both tried to find a mutual time to get together again, she was busy with her studies, and I with work.  I actually googled her a few years ago and found that she married some rich guy and is now a highly regarded piano teacher.

jingle.boy

Quote from: pg1067 on October 17, 2023, 10:53:09 AM
Quote from: Chino on August 15, 2013, 05:51:42 AM
Has anyone had experience with something like this in a similar situation? Please discuss.

I'd have been all over this thread had I been here when it was started.  I have countless online dating stories, most of which are from 30 years ago.  The oldest one I can recall was when I got my first computer in July 1993, I got on a bulletin board service called *Prodigy.  I met this woman who was a Ph.D candidate in music at USC, and she and her friend were looking to meet some guys.  One of my roommates and I met them at a local bar/pool hall.  The woman I had been communicating with was absolutely gorgeous.  Tall.  Long legs.  She walked in in a short skirt and heels.  Her friend was also attractive, but I don't remember much about her other than she was dressed somewhat frumpy and was on crutches from a broken foot.  We had a great time.  She explained that she was Croatian.  She didn't have an accent, but she said that she sometimes paused to "translate" between English and Croatian.  She also told me that the bass player in Nirvana was her cousin.  Unfortunately, while we both tried to find a mutual time to get together again, she was busy with her studies, and I with work.  I actually googled her a few years ago and found that she married some rich guy and is not a highly regarded piano teacher.

is "not", or is "now"?

The way you started to describe the first woman reminded me of the opening lyrics to Damn Yankees/Coming of Age.
Quote from: TAC on July 31, 2021, 06:55:07 PMIf I can do it, it's idiot proof.
Quote from: Stadler on January 03, 2024, 09:00:00 AMThat's a word salad - and take it from me, I know word salad
Quote from: hefdaddy42 on November 04, 2021, 05:14:36 AMI fear for the day when something happens on the right that is SO nuts that even Stadler says "That's crazy".

pg1067

Quote from: jingle.boy on October 17, 2023, 10:57:35 AM
is "not", or is "now"?

The way you started to describe the first woman reminded me of the opening lyrics to Damn Yankees/Coming of Age.

That's definitely a top-5 typo for me (for some reason).  I'm not familiar with the song, but I looked up the lyrics, and yeah...that's about it.  If 25-year old me could have custom ordered a woman, she'd have been it.