Scenes From A Hat: Round 2

[King Postwhore]

If you follow the moles on his ass I think it's a map to buried treasure!

[jingle.boy]

Nice circumcision Gene, but he came in for a hernia.

So, I'm pushing and I'm digging up there during this colonoscopy, and I'm thinking, "what the hell is an Optimus Prime action figure doing up here?"

[gmillerdrake]

There's no way this fella lives past next Tuesday.....

[lonestar]

I'll finish in a bit, the game's on...

[gmillerdrake]

Be honest....have you ever seen someone bleed that much from an accidental femoral puncture? Next time I'll remove my hands from the cavity when I sneeze.

[Lucien]

ALL OF THESE 

[gmillerdrake]

Well once I had him opened up I could see everything was fine but I removed his testicles anyway....

[King Postwhore]

If you lean him this way it looks like the cover to Octavartium.

[BlobVanDam]

So, I'm pushing and I'm digging up there during this colonoscopy, and I'm thinking, "what the hell is an Optimus Prime action figure doing up here?"

Nice try.

Be honest....have you ever seen someone bleed that much from an accidental femoral puncture? Next time I'll remove my hands from the cavity when I sneeze.

Well once I had him opened up I could see everything was fine but I removed his testicles anyway....

I can't choose between these two. You win.

[gmillerdrake]

Thanks Mr. BVD!

Standings
jingle.boy - 19
gmillerdrake - 17
lonestar - 13
kingshmegland - 8
TempusVox - 8
BlobVanDam - 8
Sir GuitarCozmo - 6
Zydar - 6
TheLordOfTheStrings - 5
Podaar - 5
masterthes - 3
Scorpion - 3
DebraKadabra - 2
Jarlaxle - 2
bout to crash - 2
TheSilentHam - 2
Ruba - 2
Jonnybaxy - 2
JayOctavarium - 2
El Barto - 1
Lolzeez - 1
soundgarden - 1
Lucien - 1
MetalJunkie - 1

New scene - First reactions/statement you say/do when you meet your hideous blind date.

[jingle.boy]

Chino was wrong.  This app sucks!

My eyes!  The goggles do nothing.
   

[Zydar]

If you're not into chloroform rags we are not a match.

[Prog Snob]

Yeah, I made it clear that I wasn't into beastiality.

[lonestar]

Ok, gotta be honest. If you still have your uvula I'm outta here.

[Onno]

EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!

[King Postwhore]

Wow a real life Pizza The Hut!

[lonestar]

Huh, so that's what my own puke taste like..

[King Postwhore]

I wish I was blind.

[jingle.boy]

Uh, no.  My name's Mike Oxlong.  I don't know who Jim is.

[gmillerdrake]

I'll take a few more before making the call......

[Prog Snob]

Your father lets you leave the kennel looking like that?

[jingle.boy]

Ah, so that's what a collapsed lung looks like.

[Prog Snob]

At least one of us shaved for the occasion.

[jingle.boy]

[Podaar]

I know, let me guess: You've got a great personality.

[Prog Snob]

I know they say what is on the inside matters most but I don't have the time to wade through all of the flaps to see what's inside.

[BlobVanDam]

I know you're blind and all, but I just can't sit here and pretend. You're ugly as all hell and I can't stand the sight of you. Since you can't see yourself anyway, nobody has ever had to face up to telling you the truth, but I'm sorry, someone had to say it. You may not have to see your face, but unfortunately I do. I would actually rather kiss your seeing eye dog at this point.

[King Postwhore]

Hey!  Aren't you the lady that does those commercials for the Christian Children's Fund?

[gmillerdrake]

At least one of us shaved for the occasion.

This late entry took it. You're up Prog Snob!

[Prog Snob]

Thanks gmillerdrake!

Standings
jingle.boy - 19
gmillerdrake - 17
lonestar - 13
kingshmegland - 8
TempusVox - 8
BlobVanDam - 8
Sir GuitarCozmo - 6
Zydar - 6
TheLordOfTheStrings - 5
Podaar - 5
masterthes - 3
Scorpion - 3
DebraKadabra - 2
Jarlaxle - 2
bout to crash - 2
TheSilentHam - 2
Ruba - 2
Jonnybaxy - 2
JayOctavarium - 2
El Barto - 1
Lolzeez - 1
soundgarden - 1
Lucien - 1
MetalJunkie - 1
Prog Snob - 1

New scene - You're asked to be John Petrucci's guitar tech.  What is one thing that you would be afraid to accidentally say during the interview?   

[jingle.boy]

That Mick Mars was a genius on the axe.

You really should just stick to 6 strings.

Hope you don't pork up like Yngvie.

[gmillerdrake]

Could I bother you with a request.....might you rub and then smoke my Chicken?

So do you $hit in the woods?

[jingle.boy]

Seriously, why won't you guys just let Kevin back in the band?

[gmillerdrake]

Don't you think it's about time you admit Katrina was your fault for shredding at four thousand beats per milli second?

What's John Myung like in bed?

Do you think PED's should be banned in professional music?

[lonestar]

Boxers, briefs, or commando