Author Topic: Scenes From A Hat: Round 2 (Read 164215 times)

jingle.boy · « **Reply #1050 on:** July 29, 2013, 07:49:53 PM »

You always said he'd be late for his own funeral, so I figured I would be too.

I discovered plutonium... BY ACCIDENT!!

I'm a White Rabbit. What did you expect?

gmillerdrake · « **Reply #1051 on:** July 29, 2013, 09:12:06 PM »

Sorry I'm late....my Uncle, Cousin and I were at the farm and couldn't get out of a conversation with a chicken who swore that Dwight Gooden walked 88 batters in 1996. My cousin finally googled it and it turns out the chicken was right.

gmillerdrake · « **Reply #1052 on:** July 29, 2013, 09:18:47 PM »

Man, I was stuck behind this annoying line of cars on the highway driving real slow with their hazard lights on. It sucked....

I mistakenly got

faced and watched 'The Big Chill'. Any of you ladies need my sperm?

masterthes · « **Reply #1053 on:** July 30, 2013, 05:24:28 AM »

I was busy burying the murder weapon

TempusVox · « **Reply #1054 on:** July 30, 2013, 06:42:56 AM »

Quote from: gmillerdrake on July 29, 2013, 09:12:06 PM

Sorry I'm late....my Uncle, Cousin and I were at the farm and couldn't get out of a conversation with a chicken who swore that Dwight Gooden walked 88 batters in 1996. My cousin finally googled it and it turns out the chicken was right.

rofl

gmillerdrake · « **Reply #1055 on:** July 30, 2013, 02:28:35 PM »

I had to stop and get this cooler and sharpen my knife.....I'm gonna want my kidney back now that Dan no longer needs it.

jonnybaxy · « **Reply #1056 on:** July 31, 2013, 01:32:09 PM »

Quote from: gmillerdrake on July 29, 2013, 09:18:47 PM

Man, I was stuck behind this annoying line of cars on the highway driving real slow with their hazard lights on. It sucked....

I mistakenly got faced and watched 'The Big Chill'. Any of you ladies need my sperm?

take your pick Gary, these both win!

gmillerdrake · « **Reply #1057 on:** July 31, 2013, 02:55:54 PM »

Cool.....The Big Chill gets an assist

Love that movie. Anyway, Thanks!

Standings:

jingle.boy - 10
gmillerdrake - 7
TempusVox - 5
lonestar - 5
kingshmegland - 5
TheLordOfTheStrings - 5
Podaar - 4
Scorpion - 3
DebraKadabra - 2
Jarlaxle - 2
bout to crash- 2
Sir GuitarCozmo-2
TheSilentHam - 2
BlobVanDam - 2
Ruba - 2
Jonnybaxy - 2
El Barto - 1
Zydar - 1
J8VRM- 1
Lolzeez- 1
masterthes - 1
soundgarden - 1

Next Scene:

Worst things to say or admission to Law Enforcement after being stopped for drinking and driving.

Lucien · « **Reply #1058 on:** July 31, 2013, 03:01:52 PM »

...Hey offisuh, could I have uh ride home? I'm drunk...

jonnybaxy · « **Reply #1059 on:** July 31, 2013, 03:04:35 PM »

I lov you brah... Can we get a kebab?

I slept with your mother when you were little

masterthes · « **Reply #1060 on:** July 31, 2013, 03:05:18 PM »

I'm not as think as you drunk I am

I've got an extra beer in the cooler if you want one

TheLordOfTheStrings · « **Reply #1061 on:** July 31, 2013, 03:13:37 PM »

What seems to be the officer, problem?

Ossifer, I swear to drunk I'm not God!

Lucien · « **Reply #1062 on:** July 31, 2013, 03:28:14 PM »

Quote from: TheLordOfTheStrings on July 31, 2013, 03:13:37 PM

What seems to be the officer, problem?

Ossifer, I swear to drunk I'm not God!

I was just thinking that

jingle.boy · « **Reply #1063 on:** July 31, 2013, 04:28:21 PM »

It's not Jäger you smell on my breath, it's vodka mixed with your daughter's pussy.

You're not gonna believe this officer, but I have a voodoo dick in my snatch.

Oh man! Now I'm gonna be REALLY late for my first meeting as a "sponsor".

Fuck, my parole officer is gonna be pissed about this.

Let's make a deal; I'll blow into that, if you blow this.

You again Sugar Tits?

Cut me some slack officer... I was just trying to get to McDonald's drive thru before breakfast ended.

King Postwhore · « **Reply #1064 on:** July 31, 2013, 07:55:50 PM »

Officer, may I unzip your pants for you?

TempusVox · « **Reply #1065 on:** August 01, 2013, 01:16:22 PM »

You're a public servant...go get me another drink!

King Postwhore · « **Reply #1066 on:** August 01, 2013, 06:54:29 PM »

You are definitely a 12 pack on the beer google scale.

gmillerdrake · « **Reply #1067 on:** August 01, 2013, 08:53:52 PM »

Quote from: jingle.boy on July 31, 2013, 04:28:21 PM

It's not Jäger you smell on my breath, it's vodka mixed with your daughter's pussy.

You're not gonna believe this officer, but I have a voodoo dick in my snatch.

Oh man! Now I'm gonna be REALLY late for my first meeting as a "sponsor".

Fuck, my parole officer is gonna be pissed about this.

Let's make a deal; I'll blow into that, if you blow this.

You again Sugar Tits?

Cut me some slack officer... I was just trying to get to McDonald's drive thru before breakfast ended.

Any one of these are good for the win, although the Jäger/Daughter breath was pretty vulgar and shocking....just the way it should be. You're up Chad!

jingle.boy · « **Reply #1068 on:** August 02, 2013, 06:06:11 AM »

Thanks G

Standings:

jingle.boy - 11
gmillerdrake - 7
TempusVox - 5
lonestar - 5
kingshmegland - 5
TheLordOfTheStrings - 5
Podaar - 4
Scorpion - 3
DebraKadabra - 2
Jarlaxle - 2
bout to crash- 2
Sir GuitarCozmo-2
TheSilentHam - 2
BlobVanDam - 2
Ruba - 2
Jonnybaxy - 2
El Barto - 1
Zydar - 1
J8VRM- 1
Lolzeez- 1
masterthes - 1
soundgarden - 1

Today's Scene: Satan welcomes you into hell by saying ....

gmillerdrake · « **Reply #1069 on:** August 02, 2013, 06:20:55 AM »

I've never....and I mean never, seen someone pursue sin like you did. Simply incredible. You were like Mike Singeltary charging down a scared rookie running back. Well done....

gmillerdrake · « **Reply #1070 on:** August 02, 2013, 09:16:32 AM »

Don't look so surprised.....you knew she was 11.

Podaar · « **Reply #1071 on:** August 02, 2013, 09:23:47 AM »

Ah, there you are. I'm so looking forward to retirement. Welcome!

TempusVox · « **Reply #1072 on:** August 02, 2013, 09:58:37 AM »

You would not even be here if it hadn't been for those three Mexicans in the car that night.

Ruba · « **Reply #1073 on:** August 03, 2013, 08:33:47 AM »

Welcome to the mega party! Tonight we're having Rebecca Black on main stage, and tomorrow's main act is Nickelback!

jingle.boy · « **Reply #1074 on:** August 03, 2013, 08:35:39 AM »

Quote from: Ruba on August 03, 2013, 08:33:47 AM

Welcome to the mega party! Tonight we're having Rebecca Black on main stage, and tomorrow's main act is Nickelback!

Well, that's certainly Coz's hell!

lonestar · « **Reply #1075 on:** August 03, 2013, 10:34:14 AM »

BEHOLD SINNER, YOU'RE MISDEEDS HAVE GOTTEN YOU AN ETERNITY OF PAIN AND SUFFERI........wait, you were married, weren't you?....ah fuck it, I'll give you the tour anyways......so over here is the lakes of fire, and back there is the torture dungeons...so how long were you married?...17 years? damn man, that's rough, you want a job here?

jonnybaxy · « **Reply #1076 on:** August 03, 2013, 12:04:38 PM »

DAY AFTER DAY AND NIGHT AFTER NIGHT

Welcome Mr Bush

So over in that corner is some swag and over there is Yolo

gmillerdrake · « **Reply #1077 on:** August 03, 2013, 02:19:30 PM »

God and I just traded some souls at the deadline and you're the 'soul to be named later'.

Oh good you're here... I need a place to stick this pitchfork.

Don't just stand there....Clinton and Hitler need some toilet paper. Get your tongue ready.....

gmillerdrake · « **Reply #1078 on:** August 03, 2013, 02:53:04 PM »

Wait....where's your Rooster?

You ever tasted a Satanic hemmeroid?

lonestar · « **Reply #1079 on:** August 04, 2013, 09:26:38 AM »

Hey,pull my finger....

jingle.boy · « **Reply #1080 on:** August 04, 2013, 08:22:47 PM »

Quote from: lonestar on August 03, 2013, 10:34:14 AM

BEHOLD SINNER, YOU'RE MISDEEDS HAVE GOTTEN YOU AN ETERNITY OF PAIN AND SUFFERI........wait, you were married, weren't you?....ah fuck it, I'll give you the tour anyways......so over here is the lakes of fire, and back there is the torture dungeons...so how long were you married?...17 years? damn man, that's rough, you want a job here?

Gary's had me chuckling the most, but this is the clear winner - especially given the time of the month (

) in the jingle household.

lonestar · « **Reply #1081 on:** August 04, 2013, 11:06:51 PM »

Thanks man, but the credit for that one goes to the late, great Sam Kinison, god rest his soul...

Standings:

jingle.boy - 11
gmillerdrake - 7
lonestar - 6
TempusVox - 5
kingshmegland - 5
TheLordOfTheStrings - 5
Podaar - 4
Scorpion - 3
DebraKadabra - 2
Jarlaxle - 2
bout to crash- 2
Sir GuitarCozmo-2
TheSilentHam - 2
BlobVanDam - 2
Ruba - 2
Jonnybaxy - 2
El Barto - 1
Zydar - 1
J8VRM- 1
Lolzeez- 1
masterthes - 1
soundgarden - 1

And today's scene..... A strange plague strickens the land, killing everyone except DTFers. The survivors refer to this odd apocalypse as.....

BlobVanDam · « **Reply #1082 on:** August 04, 2013, 11:13:05 PM »

The Aprogalypse

Octavarium sub-forum

Hell

V-Day (short for Vlasto Day)

Revenge of the Nerds V: Zydar's Revenge

jingle.boy · « **Reply #1083 on:** August 05, 2013, 05:16:24 AM »

Boskilation

Sausage Fest

The Four Horsemen ride - icysk8r ("anyone need a deck of cards?"), AndyDT ("guys, what does it mean when she swallows?"), Epicview ("sorry to do this, you'are all so nice!"), and Edan the Man ("Duncan held me captive")

Ruba · « **Reply #1084 on:** August 05, 2013, 05:22:14 AM »

A Nightmare to Remember

Lolz's Greatest Hump

Just off the record, the last round was the funniest one I had seen in a while

.

News: DreamTheaterForums is a place for people who just don't have the time for music anymore.

Author Topic: Scenes From A Hat: Round 2 (Read 164215 times)