Stupid Things that Are Really Painful.....

[TheSilentHam]

there's something about Mary injury

[slycordinator]

While I never had to deal with this one myself (since I learned vicariously from seeing my dad bitch about it one summer):
Shaving right before stepping out into the ocean beach.

[Ben_Jamin]

Leg cram during coitus.

Its worse after during rest...especially if you just got done and turn to your side of bed and bam....i almost hit my hookup when that happened


Comic Book Guy: "Worst orgasm ever"

[FiberglassMoon]

Sometimes when I am really, really sore after exercising...usually squats or deadlifts, I'll sit down at my computer for a while and forget that I'm sore.  Then I'll rush to stand up and god damn is it painful.

[Chino]

Stepping on a soldering iron whilst barefoot.
Dripping hot glue out of curiosity onto my thumb nail.
Tripping up the stairs and smashing my oh so beautiful face into a step.
Falling off a balcony.

[LieLowTheWantedMan]

That cramp that makes it feels like your toes are trying to force themselves to huddle together or something. Yeah. Fuck that.

[SystematicThought]

Freezer burn.

Honestly, I get it when I front the freezers at work. Mother fucker, that hurts when you get it on your forearm

[chknptpie]

That cramp that makes it feels like your toes are trying to force themselves to huddle together or something. Yeah. Fuck that.

Charlie horses suck for sure!

[philmcson]

While I never had to deal with this one myself (since I learned vicariously from seeing my dad bitch about it one summer):
Shaving right before stepping out into the ocean beach.

Yeah, it's always a bad idea to shave the chesthair right before hopping into salty water.....   

[SeRoX]

Wearing half latex, half cotton slip under the jeans in summer. I always remind myself not to do this shit again but still do.

[MoraWintersoul]

Falling on your tailbone... seriously. Using a butt pillow for 2 weeks was embarrassing.

Oh god no. That happened to me two years ago, I slipped on the ice and landed on my tailbone. I seriously could not move for two days, and it hurt for weeks afterwards.

[Ruba]

To sew to your finger with a sewing machine (been there, done that).

[jsem]

Stepping on a soldering iron whilst barefoot.
Dripping hot glue out of curiosity onto my thumb nail.
Tripping up the stairs and smashing my oh so beautiful face into a step.
Falling off a balcony.

When does any of these actually ever happen.

[Scorpion]

The third one actually happened to me once. Though I was drunk, so that would explain that.

[wasteland]

Falling on your tailbone... seriously. Using a butt pillow for 2 weeks was embarrassing.

Oh god no. That happened to me two years ago, I slipped on the ice and landed on my tailbone. I seriously could not move for two days, and it hurt for weeks afterwards.

It happened to me more than 12 years ago... Thanks for bringing memories back 

[Cyclopssss]

Happened to my gf last year....she still suffers from it now and then.

[?]

When I was 9, I tried to do some pull-ups, but the bar wasn't tight enough and I fell to the ground with the bar on my chest. I lost my breath for a while, and it isn't something I'd like to experience again. I've never been into sports, but after that I truly started to avoid doing pull-ups, except in school where everyone had to do it!

EDIT: I just realized that had I been alone at home with no-one to help me back then, I might've even died!

[chknptpie]

Happened to my gf last year....she still suffers from it now and then.

It's been months and I still have problems sitting for extended periods of time. I'm pretty sure I broke it, but nothing they can do to fix it.

[wasteland]

... we accept you as you are, Tricia 

[jingle.boy]

Falling off a balcony.

Is it bad to lol at this, remembering your thread?

[Hyperplex]

Yawning but trying to keep your mouth somewhat closed so as not to offend others, thereby cramping the everloving fuck out of your tongue.

Sneezing and hiccupping at the same time. Feels like your diaphragm is playing tug-of-war with your esophagus.

[Ruba]

When I was 9, I tried to do some pull-ups, but the bar wasn't tight enough and I fell to the ground with the bar on my chest. I lost my breath for a while, and it isn't something I'd like to experience again. I've never been into sports, but after that I truly started to avoid doing pull-ups, except in school where everyone had to do it!

Wow, once when I was doing pull-ups, the bar went off the wall and I fell on my back. But that must have hurt even more.

[Weymolith]

Sitting down to take a shit and having your nut get caught between your leg and the toilet seat.

[Super Dude]

Inspired by a comment from Wasteland in the Lego thread. Yeah, most remember that searing sensation of unknowingly stepping on a piece of Lego in bare feet, hurts like a bitch.


What other really stupid injuries hurt like a motherfucker?

Oh God, HATED that as a kid.

[alirocker08]

I used to play a lot of football (as in, real football where you actually kick the ball about a lot), and the ball always seemed to end up crashing against my stomach, winding me. Worst feeling ever.

[PuffyPat]

Rolling the ankle. It can happen so easily, and it's super annoying. The worst part is that it usually happens when you're not doing anything athletic. I played American football for four years in high school, and I rolled my ankle more times just being a student than I did while playing football (games or practice).

[lonestar]

I've rolled the same ankle the same way four times. Last time I did it, the orthopedic surgeon looked at my x-ray and said,"Man, I wish you had broken it."

[Hyperplex]

What sucks about sprains is that they are soft tissue injuries and soft tissue never heals back as strong as it was before (the opposite is true for bones, I am told). Many people I know, including my wife, have said a fracture is actually an easier injury to heal and recover than a sprain.

[MrBoom_shack-a-lack]

Sitting down to take a shit and having your nut get caught between your leg and the toilet seat.

I'm sorry but...lol!

[wkiml]

Sitting down to take a shit and having your nut get caught between your leg and the toilet seat.

I'm sorry but...lol!

laugh now grasshopper.....wait until the day it happens you wont be laughing then

[Hyperplex]

What I hate is when you get in the car, and this usually happens in the colder months when you're wearing thicker and heavier clothes, and as you sit down about a quarter inch of your nutsack gets lodged under your thigh and once you're in the car, buckled in and likely moving, there is no amount of shifting, stretching or bending that will uncrunch the skin. The only way is to reboot; get out of the car, peel your mashed sack off your thigh and get back in, performing the patented "peel and kneel" maneuver to prevent history from repeating itself.

[Chino]

Sitting down to take a shit and having your nut get caught between your leg and the toilet seat.

What? How does that even happen? My nuts come nowhere near the toilet seat when I sit down to poo 

[slycordinator]

What sucks about sprains is that they are soft tissue injuries and soft tissue never heals back as strong as it was before (the opposite is true for bones, I am told). Many people I know, including my wife, have said a fracture is actually an easier injury to heal and recover than a sprain.

BTW, bones are in fact weaker at the site of a break. Lots of people tell you that after they heal they're even stronger which is total horseshit, medically speaking.

Sitting down to take a shit and having your nut get caught between your leg and the toilet seat.

What? How does that even happen? My nuts come nowhere near the toilet seat when I sit down to poo 

Some people have larger ones than others and the skin can be more "stretchy" especially as one becomes elderly.

[Hyperplex]

BTW, bones are in fact weaker at the site of a break. Lots of people tell you that after they heal they're even stronger which is total horseshit, medically speaking.

That's why I added "so I'm told."

[Jaq]

I've hurt myself worse, relatively speaking-the worst injury in my life was a torn muscle in my side I somehow managed to do while in a car that suffered a rear end collision-but I'll tell you the stupidest injury I've had that, given the relative scale of the injury, counts as the most painfully stupid injury EVER.

Ages ago, when I had a sizable vinyl collection, I decided I wanted to listen to Peter Gabriel's debut solo album. I went to get it off the shelf it was stored on, and when I had put the album back in the sleeve the last time I had listened to it, the inner sleeve was lined up so the album would fall directly out of the sleeve. It proceeded to do this. It fell at a perfectly perpendicular angle to the floor at a shocking rate of speed, where it proceeded to strike, edge on, at the base of the toe nail of my big toe.

This doesn't SOUND painful. But within seconds, my toenail had turned purple from a release of blood, and for the next few days, until the damn toenail fell off, I could feel my pulse throb through my foot. All because I had an urge to listen to Moribund The Burgermeister.  Hurt like fucking hell, let me tell you.