Cup Reviews the 50 worst songs (according to Blender)

[Dr. DTVT]

19. "Broken Wings" - Mr. Mister - 1985
 
Decent 80s ballad-ish thing.  Could do a real swell job backing the intro sequence to some explosion-packed action show.  Or family drama.  It just screams opening credits. 

Great, Splent is gonna start raging (I think he was the one that really liked Mr. Mister)

18. "You're the Inspiration" - Chicago - 1984

I really feel for the many trees that were harmed in the production of this song.  It reeks of sap.

[Accelerando]

18. "You're the Inspiration" - Chicago - 1984

I really feel for the many trees that were harmed in the production of this song.  It reeks of sap.

[LieLowTheWantedMan]

Alright, none I like there. That Chicago song is sad to listen to. They used to be so good.

[lonestar]

21. "Two Princes" - Spin Doctors - 1992

This one isn't too bad, but doesn't blow me.  Apparently, these guys are/were a jam band, and I dig those, but not this so much.  Where's the jamming?  That said, I was expecting much worse.

20. "Dancing on the Ceiling" - Lionel Ritchie - 1986

Okay, I'm pretty sure I've heard this whimpering in the background at the local Safeway.  Or not.  This isn't too memorable to me; I probably wouldn't be able to tell, anyhow.  I love many 80s tunes and acts, but this belongs in Full House.  I'd rather hear 40 minutes of Joey's stand up, because that'd at least be really amusing.

19. "Broken Wings" - Mr. Mister - 1985
 
Decent 80s ballad-ish thing.  Could do a real swell job backing the intro sequence to some explosion-packed action show.  Or family drama.  It just screams opening credits. 

18. "You're the Inspiration" - Chicago - 1984

I really feel for the many trees that were harmed in the production of this song.  It reeks of sap. 

First off, on the sap line.

Second, as to Two Princes, I enjoyed the Spin Doctors, then saw this while watching Sesame Street with my kid when she was three...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7AVuvbFD3gU

Anyone who sings with Elmo, Zowie, and Telly is fucking aces in my book.

[Sketchy]

26. "The End" - The Doors - 1967

I really like this song, as well as the Doors in general.  I can see how they can be unappealing to some people, but I'm not exactly seeing qualities that'd bring out this much distaste for them.

What the hell is that doing on the list?

[MrBoom_shack-a-lack]

21. "Two Princes" - Spin Doctors - 1992

That drumsound and playing was a big learning curve for me during my youngling years as a soon to be drummer! I played that intro into oblivion!! 

18. "You're the Inspiration" - Chicago - 1984

Gr8 song/band period.

*carefully leaves thread in silence while maintaining pride*

[Lowdz]

Don't know how I missed this from the start but I'm in.

Obladi- not the worst Beatles song as others have said. I saw Yngwie cover this live once as an instrumental!  Introduced it as "my favourite song to play live" then started into this. Was certainly funny.

Meat Loaf is awesome when teamed up with Steinman. This song is classic Meat. In a good way.

No Simon & Garfunkel belongs on a worst of list.

The Final Countdown is a great song on a great album. Much of Europe's stuff is better but there is nothing wrong with TFC. Paved the way for Bon Jovi etc- which many may think is a bad thing, but not me.

[wolfking]

Broken Wings is incredible.

[DebraKadabra]

That Chicago song is sad to listen to. They used to be so good.

You got that right.

[Sir GuitarCozmo]

21. "Two Princes" - Spin Doctors - 1992

This one isn't too bad, but doesn't blow me.  Apparently, these guys are/were a jam band, and I dig those, but not this so much.  Where's the jamming?  That said, I was expecting much worse.

They're the most tolerable jam band in the world, then.  More like a pop jam band.  For a glimpse of a little bit of jam band-iness form them, check out Shinbone Alley/Hard to Exist:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TMRWePmpXs8

[splent]

19. "Broken Wings" - Mr. Mister - 1985
 
Decent 80s ballad-ish thing.  Could do a real swell job backing the intro sequence to some explosion-packed action show.  Or family drama.  It just screams opening credits. 

Great, Splent is gonna start raging (I think he was the one that really liked Mr. Mister)

Kingshmegaland also likes them alot.

But they were a seriously underrated band, lots of underlying prog influences especially later in the bands career... I mean their drummer, Pat Mastellotto, is now the drummer for King Crimson and Crimson Projeckt. 

[MasterShakezula]

Was away from home for a while.  Back with some more.

17. "Pumps & a Bump" - Hammer - 1994

Shame MC hammer went and tried to be hardcore.  It didn't work at all.

16. "What's Up?" - 4 Non Blondes - 1993

It's alright, but I prefer this version.

15. "I'll Be There For You" - Rembrandts - 1995

The only reason I care for this song is because it's the Friends song.  Even then, there are so many better TV songs like American Guy, Space Ghost Coast To Coast, ATHF, Stinsons, Workaholics, ect.  Seinfeld doesn't even really have a theme song, but its randomass slapbass runs are much better than this. 

[BlobVanDam]

The only one I recognize from those by name is the Friends one, and I didn't realize that was a real song. I thought that was just the world's most obnoxiously terrible TV theme song. It must be hard to shake the association with the show though.

[LieLowTheWantedMan]

"What's Up?" is truly one of the worst songs ever created.

[rumborak]

The singer being flat during each chorus kills me every time I hear it. Ugh.

Just listened to the MC Hammer song. Had never heard it, and for good reason.

[splent]

Rembrants recorded the actual song AFTER they recorded the opening for Friends.  When it's popularity blew up they recorded the actual song to get some radio airplay.

I actually like What's Up.  It's just one you can sing in the middle of the night with the windows rolled up in the car as you are driving and just shout HEYYYYYYAYYYYYAYYYYYY

[Sketchy]

What's going on?

Also, yes, have you seen the version where it's put to various clips of the cartoon He-Man? I laughed hard when I saw that.

[T-ski]

"What's Up" is definitely one of the worst songs I have ever heard.  Definitely.

[ZirconBlue]

I like it, personally. 

[splent]

FINISH LISTENING CUP

[MasterShakezula]

14. "From a Distance" - Bette Midler - 1990

I already had a poor feeling about this when that cheezy MIDI piano came in.  Then the actual verse came in and it went and died.  I'll happily keep my distance from this song.  I don't even care about the Christian lyrics.  Firstly, I don't have a problem with religious content in songs.  Secondly, this song could be about OJ, Sonic Hedgehog, The Crimean War, or even a play by play of The Empire Strikes Back, but the music would blow and I wouldn't like it.

13. "Illegal Alien" - Genesis - 1983

This isn't too bad.  It sounds nothing like the PG Genesis, and I wouldn't say this sound is as good as that one.  However, the tune's pretty memorable and the arrangement is easy on the ears.  It's a bit hard to take Phil Collins singing in that silly-ass Speedy Gonzalez voice, though. 

12. "Kokomo" - Beach Boys - 1988

If it was done with a much less placid production and with a much more energetic performance, it'd be alright.  Except it's not. 

11. "Invisible" - Clay Aiken - 2003

I'd much rather it be "Inaudible". 

[Zook]

Am I the only person in the world who likes Kokomo?

[Pols Voice]

Illegal Alien gets too much flak. It's lame, but listenable. Kokomo is kind of irritating.

[The King in Crimson]

11. "Invisible" - Clay Aiken - 2003

I'd much rather it be "Inaudible".

Well done.

[Lowdz]

Am I the only person in the world who likes Kokomo?

No. I love it too.
I woke up to the clock radio playing it years ago and it's been in my head ever since. Make's me want to hula dance for some reason. That's not a pretty sight! 

[splent]

I always thought Kokomo was overrated.... give me God Only Knows any day over Kokomo.  As for Illegal Alien, I'd rather listen to a few other songs from that album than Illegal Alien (i.e. Home By The Sea)