Music as Ministry

[Orbert]

I play music in church (two different ones, actually) and sing in the choir, and to be honest, I do it more out of my love of music than because I'm so devout that I feel the burning desire to spread The Word.  I have had been told that I'm very good at what I do, people love hearing it, and others had told me that they love serving with me.  That's nice to hear, of course.

I wrote about the gig itself in my thread in the Musicians Forum titled "So I Quit the Praise Band".  This has more to do with the ministry side of it, which is why I've put it here.

I did the evening service yesterday and the two this morning (that's how it works when you accept the weekend assignment), and since it's the same sermon all three times and we're only required to attend one, we huddle in the green room during the first service on Sunday morning for Devotion.  The topic today was how our music is part of the service, part of the actual ministry.  Yeah, we want to sound good and it's nice when people tell us so, but we are not "entertainment".  We're leading the worship during the times we're playing.  Our words and music have one purpose: to bring people closer to God and Jesus.  Our WL went as far as to say that if we're not into it 100%, we might as well not be there at all, and he quoted a passage from Revelation about how God loves the hot and can work with the cold, but he'll spit out the lukewarm.  I honestly thought that that was weird, extreme, and maybe even the wrong way to look at it.  Yes, I'm one of those who's not afraid to question The Word.

I see our job as playing the best we can, and as a performer, that includes looking like you're into it and playing with enthusiasm.  When I'm playing, I am into it, so even though I'm on keys and don't have a microphone, I can't help singing along sometimes, and I'm clapping my hands during the parts when we're trying to get people to clap.  People go to church for all different reasons, and if one reason they go is because they like the music and that part of the service, then at least I've given them a reason to come.  Once they're there, the pastor can work on them; that's his job.

But no, we're not entertainment.  Our Worship Leader stated that he would much rather have us into the Spirit than have a perfect performance musically.  Of course, he's an ordained minister as well, so I can see that position.  I have no problem with that.  With live music, the attitude is more important than technical perfection.  But the idea that if I'm not doing it because I'm burning with the desire to praise the Lord through my music, then I shouldn't even be there, bugs me.  What should it be all or nothing?

Maybe it's guilt.  I am a Christian and I do believe.  That's not the problem.  But these people I serve with are really into it.  Last night, our background singer was so moved by what we we're doing that she was crying onstage and had trouble even singing the words.  After the service, there were people in the congregation who were so moved that they were weeping openly and couldn't get up and move on until they'd composed themselves.  This happened all three services, but the most were the second service this morning.  There was a woman in the front row still there, sobbing, by time I'd packed all my gear and was taking it out to the car.  You non-believers may scoff and laugh, but religion is a very powerful thing.

Anyway, the "guilt" part.  Everyone else in the band is on fire with The Spirit.  I am not.  I'm actually a very private person and do not wear my beliefs on the outside.  (Some people here on DTF know more about me than my friends do, but that's because I can share things in the relative anonymity of the Internet that I don't even share with them.)  When it comes to spreading the Word, I am not the one you should ask.  I can speak the words, but it will not truly be from my heart.  It will partly be from my heart, I believe, and I'm a good speaker, so I'll actually convince people, but inside, I'll know I'm kinda faking it.  Now, you want someone to play the piano, or saxophone or flute, or sing badly but in tune?  I'm your man.  And I'm going to give it 100%.

But... wow.  To be told that I'm doing a good thing, something that brings people closer to God and Jesus, for the "wrong" reasons... that hurts.  In a time when the Church is under attack from all sides and people seem to be losing their religion and straying for His way, I'm doing something I do believe in, and doing my part, and I'm not trying to do the part I'm not good at.  And now I'm being told that if I'm only doing it because I love playing music, a gift He gave me in the first place, then I'm doing it for the wrong reason.  Our Worship Leader said that, and I've encountered it in different forms at the other campus as well.

Doing the right thing is still doing the right thing... um... right?

[yeshaberto]

I would say that ideally he is right.  however, I could never truly say that I use my gifts with 100% pure motives, but God is still glorified in them.  I would encourage you to continue playing with excellence.  As you see people's spiritual relationships moved by your gift it will help to inspire your own spiritual relationship.

[hefdaddy42]

Keep doing it.  Just because he doesn't understand your motivations doesn't mean that they are wrong.  I am also involved in music ministry.

[snapple]

I never have done the worship team at church because I hate worship music and feel that I would be taking someone's place who would actually enjoy it.

Oh, I'm usually hungover, too.

[sirbradford117]

I am a professional church musician in the Catholic Church, where the music and liturgy is generally seen as an encounter with the sacred but not quite in the modern-day "praise and worship" sense.  Hymns, chant, psalmody, choral anthems are our thing...

Definitely keep it up and continue playing.  I always find myself lost in performance while conducting, forgetting that the real reason we're there is for the worship of the Almighty.  On one hand, I understand that ministry is the primary role of my choirs.  On the other hand, I spend hours teaching my singers and instrumentalists about proper technique, reading notes, expression, and musical artistry that the thrill of performance can obscure the worship that is happening. 

Ultimately, it's all about what the music means to each individual congregant, singer, minister, cantor, "worship leader," "music director," etc.  Different things move us in different ways.  Some of my choir members are visually and aurally moved to prayer through the words we sing, however off-key they might be singing in the process.  Others lend strong voices as leaders in their sections, and are there to make music.  But surely the strong voices are also praying, and those who are off-key enjoy making music as well.

It goes both ways.  Don't let some bad quote of Scripture and subsequent unfair judgment stop you from doing what you love!

[Orbert]

Thanks for the responses, guys!

I'm not thinking of quitting.  My real concern is that at some point they figure out that I'm "faking it" and stop asking me.  I'm not really faking it of course.  I believe in what I'm doing, I believe that I'm doing good work and helping bring people closer to The Almighty, and I believe the words.  It's just that I'm still primarily doing it because I love playing music, not because I have a burning desire to "preach" through my music.  When my WL, a guy I have great respect for as a musician, revealed that he honestly would rather not work with guys who are only "lukewarm" about it, I felt an urge to confess to him that I was only lukewarm myself.  Probably due to the well-known phenomenon of religion=guilt which has turned so many people off of religion.

I'm still thinking of (very carefully) approaching the subject with him.  I'm now curious to see where it will go, because I know he wants me to keep serving with him on his team, and I would like to see how he resolves his stated position with his duties and desires to keep good players on his team.

[kirbywelch92]

"Sing to him a new song; play skillfully on the strings, with loud shouts." - Psalm 33:3

I always used that verse as justification for the fact that I approach worship music both as a means of giving praise and glory while at the same time playing and expressing music. That's all we musicians have, if a painter wants to make a painting for God than surely they will try to make a good one. To me, making music is no different. It's a means of taking artistic and creative expression (both of which were created by God) and applying them to Him instead of other things. So I say play away, love what you do, love God and call it a day.

[hefdaddy42]

Yeah, you should love using your musical gifts.  That's why God gave them to you.

[Ravenheart]

Based on what you've described, I see no reason to give up what you are doing just because your convictions aren't in perfect conjunction with those of the people around you.

[hefdaddy42]

Figured this was as good a place to post this as any.

I normally play acoustic guitar with our praise team, but this week I am getting to play drums due to some absences by some other members of the team.  One of those absences is the bass player.  My 15-year old daughter, who is a musical sponge, asked the worship leader if she could fill in on bass this week.  He was just glad a hole had been filled, so he enthusiastically agreed.  Then my daughter grabs the bass to bring home and practice with, and says "Sweet!  Now I need to figure out how to play this thing!"  His face dropped.

(Yes, she was serious.)

We had rehearsal last night.  She was pretty good, nothing too fancy, but hit all the right notes and stayed more or less locked in with me on drums. 

*Proud Papa*

[Orbert]

That's awesome, Hef!  Sounds like musical talent runs in the family.

[hefdaddy42]

That's awesome, Hef!  Sounds like musical talent runs in the family.

She's a lot more talented than I am.  I am a competent rhythm guitar player, and that rhythm makes me a competent drummer in a completely amateur setting (like a local church praise team).  I also dabble in bass.  But she absorbs new instruments all the time.  In the marching band, she plays in the pit/front ensemble (xylophone, marimba, cymbals, other assorted percussion instruments).  When our "family band" plays out, she is the rhythm section, playing djembe, shakers, tambourine, rain stick, etc.  She has also taught herself piano, and has a weird affinity for recorders of all different sizes and scales.  She is also teaching herself violin, and plays upright bass some during concert band season. 

[snapple]

Ive been thinking about this a lot lately, Orb. What do you feel God has placed on your heart to do? (it's something you don't need to share with me) follow what you feel God is compelling you to do. And, know that He loves anything you do in His name.

[Orbert]

I believe that He has given me a gift.  As with most artists, that gift comes with a overwhelming compulsion to share it, which makes perfect sense.  It is a gift that is meant to be shared.  It brings joy to those who experience it.  I spent the first 40some years of my life doing it because I love to do it, and a big part of that is because I love seeing people's reactions to it.  Yeah, I feed on the ego trip.  But I also enjoy spending time alone, just playing.  I can sit in a room with just a piano and we'll be fine for hours.  Where is the ego then?

But as far as playing in the church, there's the conflict.  Of course the church benefits, and what I'm doing glorifies Him.  But if asked directly why I do it, for Him or for me, I'm doing it because I love making music, not because of an overwhelming desire to praise God.  As I've said, I don't have a problem with it, and up until now I wasn't aware that anyone else did.  I would think that in a practical sense, they're just glad to have someone up there on keyboards.  Or on the flute or saxophone, or piano, or in the choir (which I do in my regular church).

That's why I really don't get the idea that it must be all or nothing.  White hot or stone cold, but none of this lukewarm crap.  He doesn't want me if I'm only lukewarm about it.  I don't think that that's how God would want it, and I think we're looking at a case where scripture has been misinterpreted.  No surprise there, but this affects me directly, so I was curious as to whether others have encountered it before, and what others think about it.

Now... if I was told that making praise music is a different deal, that it actually is wrong to get off on the applause because it's not supposed to be about me or the band, but about Him, I can totally understand that.  All glory to the Creator and all that.  So maybe that's where my guilt is coming from.  I know I should be doing it to glorify Him, but deep inside, I'm doing it because I love making music.  But He gave me that gift in the first place!  So what the heck?  I have the gift, I'm using it the best I can, but because it's for the wrong reasons, it's still wrong somehow?

I can't change how I feel about it.  All I can do is try to see it differently (which oddly enough is happening through this dialogue) and hopefully that will bring about a change.  I'm reminded of Cat Stevens, one of my favorite singer-songwriters from the 70's, who quit making music entirely when he found religion.  He didn't want to do something that was so ego-driven, as he felt it was wrong.  I don't agree with taking it that far, but I can understand those who do.  Then, some 30 years later, he came to terms with it and realized that his gift was meant to be shared, and it's just as wrong that he does not share his divine gift.  So now he makes music again.  I'm not nearly the talent that Yusef Islam (formerly Cat Stevens) is, but I can see our situations as similar.