Author Topic: Does anyone remember the "How You Lost Your Virginity vs. MS Paint" thread?  (Read 4983 times)

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Offline TimmyHiggy

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:lol
my favourite music sex story was my friend who said he had his music playing from his computer on shuffle, consequently he lost his virginity to "Zombie Nation"
i heard if you put bread in the rooof of your mouth it means oyu don't cvry when you're shoocppig ononsosni.
<br />/I vea aben told buy   spletn spencer adn timhiggy and that zletar guy to potost gcase imm drunk for the fist imeiiiiiiiiiiiii eoand evryoen ois mkaking funof eme :O(<br />
<br />

Offline Lynxo

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 :lol

Btw, I don't recommend Meshuggah as sex music...it gets ugly.. :|
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not surprisingly I can be descriptively creepy if people really insist.

or not.

I lasted 5 actual minutes.
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Offline PlaysLikeMyung

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I can't ms paint, so here's a greentext version:

>be 14
>be horny as all fuck
>girl who I used to date is over
>we used to do shit sexually
>do more shit sexually
>get C- blowjob
>girl suggests we do it
>fuckyea.jpg
>last all of 45 seconds
>ohgodwhathaveidone.jpg
>girl has daughter nine months later...
>fuck my life
>discover I'm not the only guy she slept with at that time
>crisis averted

Online YtseBitsySpider

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^^DNA test please^^


Congratulations.jpg
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Offline emindead

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Mine would include the forum and the joke "emindad" in it.

Offline zxlkho

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I can't ms paint, so here's a greentext version:

>be 14
>be horny as all fuck
>girl who I used to date is over
>we used to do shit sexually
>do more shit sexually
>get C- blowjob
>girl suggests we do it
>fuckyea.jpg
>last all of 45 seconds
>ohgodwhathaveidone.jpg
>girl has daughter nine months later...
>fuck my life
>discover I'm not the only guy she slept with at that time
>crisis averted

holy shit did this really happen?
I AM A GUY
You're a fucking stupid bitch.
Orion....that's the one with a bunch of power chords and boringly harsh vocals, isn't it?

Offline antigoon

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Mine would include the forum and the joke "emindad" in it.
I remember that! :lol

Offline PlaysLikeMyung

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I can't ms paint, so here's a greentext version:

>be 14
>be horny as all fuck
>girl who I used to date is over
>we used to do shit sexually
>do more shit sexually
>get C- blowjob
>girl suggests we do it
>fuckyea.jpg
>last all of 45 seconds
>ohgodwhathaveidone.jpg
>girl has daughter nine months later...
>fuck my life
>discover I'm not the only guy she slept with at that time
>crisis averted

holy shit did this really happen?

Yes. Imagine you're 14 and freaking the fuck out because you might have gotten somebody pregnant :x

Offline bout to crash

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holy shit
Oh Jackie, always jumping to the most homoerotic possibility.

Offline Perpetual Change

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So wait, did you actually know she was pregnant? Or did you just not see her for nine months and then viola?

Offline black_biff_stadler

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So wait, did you actually know she was pregnant? Or did you just not see her for nine months and then viola?

Exactly how many centimeters do you have to be dilated to squeeze one of them bad boys out?
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Offline Perpetual Change

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Don't get it.

Offline Orbert

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You probably meant "voila!" - as in "here it is, check it out!"

Instead, the image was of her giving birth to


Offline Perpetual Change

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Hahaha. I don't remember the proper emoticon for that, so I'll just say

 :facepalm: + :lol

Offline Orbert

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It's okay. For a long time, I had no idea how "vwala" was spelled, as I'd only ever heard it spoken, never seen it written.  The first time I encountered it in written form, I thought it said "viola" and wondered if there was some alternate definition or something.

So now, just to be silly, I say "viola" sometimes instead of "voila".  Insert the key, turn the knob, and "vee-oh-lah" the door opens!

Offline bout to crash

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 :lol
Oh Jackie, always jumping to the most homoerotic possibility.

Offline MetalManiac666

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I would make one, but it was just ordinary. :P

Offline alirocker08

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I don't have a funny or amusing losing my virginity/first kiss/whatever story. It's kind of tragic really. My boyfriend didn't know he was my first boyfriend until a week after we started dating, so our first kiss was a rushed little thing in between going to a lesson. As for losing my virginity? We were round at his house without his parents, watching children's TV. He was in the mood but I wanted to watch Horrible Histories which was coming on next, but in reality I felt it was too soon.

Is it any wonder that I got dumped?
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Offline Lynxo

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I don't have a funny or amusing losing my virginity/first kiss/whatever story. It's kind of tragic really. My boyfriend didn't know he was my first boyfriend until a week after we started dating, so our first kiss was a rushed little thing in between going to a lesson. As for losing my virginity? We were round at his house without his parents, watching children's TV. He was in the mood but I wanted to watch Horrible Histories which was coming on next, but in reality I felt it was too soon.

Is it any wonder that I got dumped?
Yes, it certainly is. If that was the reason then I'd say you're better off without him.
Lynxo cured my bad breath with his penis.

Offline black_biff_stadler

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Hahaha. I don't remember the proper emoticon for that, so I'll just say

 :facepalm: + :lol

:lolpalm: = "colon"lolpalm"colon"

Glad to be of service  :)
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Offline bout to crash

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lolpalm

am I doing it wrong??  :-[
Oh Jackie, always jumping to the most homoerotic possibility.

Offline MetalJunkie

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lolpalm

am I doing it wrong??  :-[
In the colon? Nah, only conservatives think that's wrong.
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Offline glaurung

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 :lol
Cole: "Ow I just got hit in the balls"
Me: "How?"
Cole: "Well you know when you try to scratch your balls, and you scratch too hard?
I'll admit sometimes I want to listen to Dragonforce.

Offline bout to crash

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I love that shit.
Oh Jackie, always jumping to the most homoerotic possibility.

Offline carl320

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In high school my buddies and I built a Van Der Graaf generator.  You know, to get girls.

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Offline MetalManiac666

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lol

Offline black_biff_stadler

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lolpalm

am I doing it wrong??  :-[

:lolpalm: Dammit Jackie!
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Offline bout to crash

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 ;D
Oh Jackie, always jumping to the most homoerotic possibility.

Offline sonatafanica

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here is the story of my first kiss, it was her's too




and that is how i ruined two people's first kisses

Online YtseBitsySpider

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not sure how to quote Jackie's sig...but...well there ya go.
Again.


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Offline Jirpo

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here is the story of my first kiss, it was her's too


and that is how i ruined two people's first kisses

:lol :lol

Offline skydivingninja

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 :lol :lol :lol at Chris

Offline bout to crash

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Aww Chris  :lol

not sure how to quote Jackie's sig...but...well there ya go.
Again.

 ;)
Oh Jackie, always jumping to the most homoerotic possibility.