Author Topic: A DTF Interactive RPG!  (Read 22980 times)

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Offline Dimitrius

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #35 on: February 23, 2011, 07:25:09 PM »
Joe and I in the same squad is basically the virtual equivalent of us plowing a rape van through an elementary school playground at recess.

Offline Ultimetalhead

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #36 on: February 23, 2011, 07:32:59 PM »
C'MON GUYS IF YOU AGREE ON SOMETHING IN THE NEXT TEN MINUTES I'LL UPDATE IT AGAIN
Orion....that's the one with a bunch of power chords and boringly harsh vocals, isn't it?
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Offline Dimitrius

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #37 on: February 23, 2011, 07:34:11 PM »
D) Use item:

Jingle the keys in an attempt to distract her
Joe and I in the same squad is basically the virtual equivalent of us plowing a rape van through an elementary school playground at recess.

Offline Ultimetalhead

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #38 on: February 23, 2011, 07:35:47 PM »
Oh, yeah. I forgot. 3 agreeing votes must be cast in order for the story to move on.

Edit: Meh, someone would probably just go along with the keys thing anyway. JUST THIS ONCE THOUGH.

You take out the keys and jiggle them in front of you. Aranka seems fixated on them. You move them from side to side, and her eyes follow them. You throw them off to your left side. Her eyes immediately dart back to you. She chuckles to herself.

"Did you really think that was going to work?" She mocks. She brings the club up above her head, ready to strike. She brings it down and makes contact with the ground directly to your left side. You got out of the way just in time.

ARANKA MOONFLOWER
HP: 100/100
MP: 20/20
STRENGTHS: UNKNOWN
WEAKNESSES: UNKNOWN

A) Attack (State where)
B) Defend
C) Attempt Escape
D) Use Item

YOU
HP: 25/25
MP: 0/0

INVENTORY! (ANALYSIS!)
Half of a meatball sub
Wallet (State ID)
« Last Edit: February 23, 2011, 07:55:15 PM by Ultimetalhead »
Orion....that's the one with a bunch of power chords and boringly harsh vocals, isn't it?
LOOK AT THIS AWESOME SHIT AHHHHHH

Offline ScioPath

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #39 on: February 23, 2011, 07:58:26 PM »
MP is Magic Points or Mike Portny?

Offline antigoon

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #40 on: February 23, 2011, 08:00:28 PM »
aranka moonflower :rollin

Offline Ultimetalhead

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #41 on: February 23, 2011, 08:01:13 PM »
MP is Magic Points or Mike Portny?
Magic Points.  :lol
Orion....that's the one with a bunch of power chords and boringly harsh vocals, isn't it?
LOOK AT THIS AWESOME SHIT AHHHHHH

Offline Genowyn

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #42 on: February 23, 2011, 08:10:47 PM »
Now that the keys are appropriately on the ground, we need to build a mousetrap.

For capturing Aranka.

...my name is Araragi.

Offline Dimitrius

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #43 on: February 23, 2011, 08:45:02 PM »
Now that the keys are appropriately on the ground, we need to build a mousetrap.

For capturing Aranka.
:clap:
Joe and I in the same squad is basically the virtual equivalent of us plowing a rape van through an elementary school playground at recess.

Offline LieLowTheWantedMan

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #44 on: February 23, 2011, 09:34:15 PM »
Now that the keys are appropriately on the ground, we need to build a mousetrap.

For capturing Aranka.
:lol

Offline Nick

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #45 on: February 23, 2011, 09:40:48 PM »
A) Attack.

Smack that bitch right in the ovaries.
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Offline Dr. DTVT

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #46 on: February 23, 2011, 10:08:11 PM »
Now that the keys are appropriately on the ground, we need to build a mousetrap.

For capturing Aranka.

 :lol

That just made my night.

Now can we run before she pounds our top brain into our lower brain?
     

Online ariich

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #47 on: February 24, 2011, 12:49:54 AM »
A) Attack.

Smack that bitch right in the ovaries.
That.

Ariich is a freak, or somehow has more hours in the day than everyone else.
I be am boner inducing.

Offline LeeHarveyKennedy

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Re: Oh yeah, right in the babymaker. Booyah, bitch
« Reply #48 on: February 24, 2011, 01:07:49 AM »
HOLY MARY MOTHER OF GOD!!!!!  THIS is why LHK is the President of Awesome.

Why is everything you post the best thing ever said?  :lol

LHK is beyond EPIC.
 :hefdaddy

Offline Ultimetalhead

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #49 on: February 24, 2011, 06:09:37 AM »
You swing the board back and slam it into Aranka's leg. It seems to be quite effective, judging by her screams of pain. With a deafening roar, she runs at you with the club and hits you in directly in the side of your face, sending you flying several feet. The board has been knocked out of your hands.

ARANKA MOONFLOWER
HP: 75/100
MP: 20/20
STRENGTHS: UNKNOWN
WEAKNESSES: UNKNOWN

A) Run for the board
B) Defend
C) Try to talk her down
D) Use item

YOU
HP: 1/25
MP: 0/0

INVENTORY! (ANALYSIS!)
Half of a meatball sub (crushed)
Wallet (State ID)
Orion....that's the one with a bunch of power chords and boringly harsh vocals, isn't it?
LOOK AT THIS AWESOME SHIT AHHHHHH

Online Zydar

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #50 on: February 24, 2011, 06:10:31 AM »
A) Run for the board
Zydar is my new hero.  I just laughed so hard I nearly shat.

Online ariich

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #51 on: February 24, 2011, 07:14:29 AM »
C) Talk her down.

She's bound to be reasonable. Plus her ovaries are apparently in her leg.

Ariich is a freak, or somehow has more hours in the day than everyone else.
I be am boner inducing.

Offline inoku

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #52 on: February 24, 2011, 08:14:28 AM »
C

Offline Dr. DTVT

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #53 on: February 24, 2011, 11:22:57 AM »
C...unless UMH has the balls to kill us in the opening fight and end it
     

Offline Dimitrius

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #54 on: February 24, 2011, 11:28:22 AM »
C)

Though with a last name like moonflower, expect her to start complaining about you and EVERY OTHER GUY SHE HAS EVER MET!
Joe and I in the same squad is basically the virtual equivalent of us plowing a rape van through an elementary school playground at recess.

Offline Ultimetalhead

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #55 on: February 24, 2011, 12:52:16 PM »
C) Talk her down.

She's bound to be reasonable. Plus her ovaries are apparently in her leg.
Well, she's giant, and you're not. You'd have to get on a step stool. :p

You think that since this...thing was once your girlfriend, that she must still have emotions and can still be reasoned with.

"Aranka, don't you know who I am? You said you loved me!" you plead with her.

"I could never love somebody who doesn't love Minecraft." She responds, "I think it's time we end this." She brings the club above her head. Just as she's about to bring the club crashing down onto your body, you hear an old man's voice reciting an incantation. Aranka's body is suddenly engulfed in fire. You turn to see who it is rescuing you, and see an old man with white hair and a full length white beard. You try to get up to run away, but you're weakened and can not move a single muscle without feeling immense amounts of pain.

ARANKA MOONFLOWER
HP: 30/100
MP: 20/20
STRENGTHS: UNKNOWN
WEAKNESSES: UNKNOWN

YOU                  ?
HP: 1/25            HP: 50/50
MP: 0/0             MP: 45/50
                       Spells: Fire, Poison, Heal

DISABLED          A) Attack (Specify physical or magic)
                       B) Defend
                     

INVENTORY! (ANALYSIS!)
Half of a meatball sub (crushed)
Wallet (State ID)
« Last Edit: February 24, 2011, 12:58:38 PM by Ultimetalhead »
Orion....that's the one with a bunch of power chords and boringly harsh vocals, isn't it?
LOOK AT THIS AWESOME SHIT AHHHHHH

Online ariich

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #56 on: February 24, 2011, 01:20:29 PM »
HEAL US DAMMIT, HEAL US

Ariich is a freak, or somehow has more hours in the day than everyone else.
I be am boner inducing.

Offline Dimitrius

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #57 on: February 24, 2011, 02:08:36 PM »
Joe and I in the same squad is basically the virtual equivalent of us plowing a rape van through an elementary school playground at recess.

Offline LeeHarveyKennedy

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Re: Maybe it'll distract the beast?
« Reply #58 on: February 24, 2011, 02:27:19 PM »
I choose this time to fap, furiously, in the pants.
HOLY MARY MOTHER OF GOD!!!!!  THIS is why LHK is the President of Awesome.

Why is everything you post the best thing ever said?  :lol

LHK is beyond EPIC.
 :hefdaddy

Offline Bonham

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Re: Maybe it'll distract the beast?
« Reply #59 on: February 24, 2011, 02:30:42 PM »
I choose this time to fap, furiously, in the pants.

Would that be a physical or a magic attack?

Offline LeeHarveyKennedy

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Re: Seriously, after a post like that, why would you expect more up here?
« Reply #60 on: February 24, 2011, 02:34:17 PM »
I choose this time to fap, furiously, in the pants.

Would that be a physical or a magic attack?

Well, it starts off physical, but then gets pretty magical towards the end, so... Your call, I guess.
HOLY MARY MOTHER OF GOD!!!!!  THIS is why LHK is the President of Awesome.

Why is everything you post the best thing ever said?  :lol

LHK is beyond EPIC.
 :hefdaddy

Offline Dr. DTVT

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #61 on: February 24, 2011, 02:50:15 PM »
No, Attack with magic.  We can get healed after Aranka become a wad of flaming flesh.
     

Offline robwebster

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #62 on: February 24, 2011, 03:31:31 PM »
No, Attack with magic.  We can get healed after Aranka become a wad of flaming flesh.
Seconded! Attack with magic!

Or, to use the scientific term, "kamikaze."

I wonder how quickly we can get a game over...

Offline Ultimetalhead

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #63 on: February 24, 2011, 03:57:55 PM »
2 votes for healing, 2 votes for a magical attack.

One more vote, and specify a spell, if you could.
Orion....that's the one with a bunch of power chords and boringly harsh vocals, isn't it?
LOOK AT THIS AWESOME SHIT AHHHHHH

Offline robwebster

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #64 on: February 24, 2011, 03:58:45 PM »
Think DTVT was going for fire. "Wad of flaming flesh" and that. I seconded him on that assumption at any rate.

Offline Ultimetalhead

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #65 on: February 24, 2011, 03:59:46 PM »
Makes sense. Didn't notice.

ONE MORE VOTE QUICK
Orion....that's the one with a bunch of power chords and boringly harsh vocals, isn't it?
LOOK AT THIS AWESOME SHIT AHHHHHH

Offline TheVoxyn

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #66 on: February 24, 2011, 04:02:12 PM »
Magical fire.

Offline Ultimetalhead

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #67 on: February 24, 2011, 04:08:33 PM »
Your rescuer casts a final blast of fire onto Aranka's body. She screams in pain and disappears into thin air. He turns in your direction, mumbles a spell, and you instantly feel yourself recover from your wounds.

"That was close," He says to you. "Do you know what that was?"

"Yeah, she was my girlfriend. She was talking to me about this Minecraft thing, and I just kind of blew it off," you respond.

"Oof, big mistake." He says. You're now even more confused, and a little bit angry.

"Dude, what the hell's going on here?"

"First off, introductions. My name's Kevin Moore. I'm about to turn 126 years old, but I haven't been out of my house in quite a long time. Things have certainly changed around here since the war."

"The...war?"

"Yeah, listen. I'd love to tell you more about it, but it's dangerous here. Come back to my house and we can chat." He seems like a nice enough person, but your mother always told you never to trust strangers. Though, after what just happened, trusting strangers seems like a safer option.

A) Go with him to his house
B) "Uh...can't we just talk here?"
« Last Edit: February 25, 2011, 07:57:26 PM by Ultimetalhead »
Orion....that's the one with a bunch of power chords and boringly harsh vocals, isn't it?
LOOK AT THIS AWESOME SHIT AHHHHHH

Offline robwebster

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #68 on: February 24, 2011, 04:13:54 PM »
Trust strangers! Trust strangers!

He may have puppies! Or sweets!

Offline ClairvoyantCat

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Re: A DTF Interactive RPG!
« Reply #69 on: February 24, 2011, 04:15:38 PM »
Talk to him here.  Have him explain his knowledge to you right now.  If you don't ask him now, he might never be open again.