Pffft, like I'm neglecting this just because I'm running a roulette … Who are you taking me for, a seven years disappearing act?
Oh, Ok.
Anyways, I've already described my Home/TDoE Integration Theory in the Controversial Opinions thread, hence I'm saving you all fine gentlemen from the tedium. What to do then? Well, let's let my italics counterpart translate the song into an Edward-Victoria sexual intercourse play-by-play, and let's try to do it without getting Bosk fired at work and yours truly tied, quartered & banned. I need some Molinari (shout out to my Ryder boy!) laser precision here.
09: The Dance of Eternity:
0:00 – 0:31: The bass is a boiling cauldron. In fact, that's what this intro is suggesting: a magical concoction mixing this album's first riff with distant fragrances from Metropolis. But mainly, the bass is a motherfocking boiling cauldron.
”Come inside, dear.”
“Oh, Ned, your bedroom smells funny.”
“I'm a Senator. Lots of parties I will deny have ever happened in here ...”
0:31 – 0:44: This sounds like a warning: “we're gonna take you for a stroll on atonal avenue” or, better yet, “we're in the ballpark of the madness going on after you heard the third arrives seven years ago”. Challenge accepted.
”Let me help you off your coat, dear”
“Thanks … Oy, how in the hell are you already naked and ready?”
“They call me The Miracle, baby.”
0:44 – 1:17: This is LTE music with a bit more of studio time. It's taking me out of the story and straight into my usual “let's listen to impossible shit in awe” office. That's generally a pretty enjoyable place, but not really where I want to be while I'm wondering who banged Victoria.
“Oh, Ned, what is that?”
“Poor naive girl, is it the first time you see one? I guess you don't even know the name for it”
“I'd say it's like a cock, but incredibly smaller...”
1:17 – 1:19: Nice touch, Jordan. I guess you've taken care of Derek's comparisons with this great take on LitS's fusion piano breaks.
“... Ned, why are you crying?”
“...”
1:19 – 1:29: I've been waiting for that since track 01. You can't spell Metropolis without that lick.
”Oh, I see, you must love your brother very much”
“Not right now, I really don't”
1:29 – 2:05: I am convinced Mighty Mike has personally written this segment on the drums and the actual notes have been added as a logical necessity. Four albums and one EP in, this is his absolute zenith.
”What the fock is that, girl?”
“A shawl-corset-knickers lingerie complete. No visible skin, it's 1928!”
“No wonder we're calling it the Great Depression”
2:05 – 2:32: I'm staying on Mike here because, c'mon, this is his song. Please forgive the paradox and its implications, but don't you think he's playing in a very Manginiesque way of underlining the riffs here?
”What do you mean you won't do that, Vic? Are you pulling a Meat Loaf?”
“1928 Prohibitionism, Ned. Nil by mouth.”
“Will you when I'm President?”
2:32 – 2:48: Say what you will, I focking love this odd bit and its placement. Still, I always wonder why people insist to call this “the ragtime section”. Ragtime is a slow business (Scott Joplin used to write on his sheet music: “I beg you, play it slowly”), this is dixieland.
“You like this young music, dear? Does it make you horny?”
“Yeah. Is it Winger?”
2:48 – 3:07: KevMo/JP original unison runs upstaged. The slate is clean now.
”You like it, don't you? You watching and thoughtfully smiling little bitch?”
“Ned, I hate to tell you this, but you're focking my corset's buttonhole.”
3:07 – 3:20: A blizzard of badass bass, Master Myung. I'd like to play this bit slowed down ten times and discover it's actually the whole Cliff's Anesthesia compressed.
”You like it now, don't you? You snitching reincarnating dream haunting little whore?”
“Oh, you in now?”
3:20 – 4:32: I can be led to believe this is played on the drums by a single human being, I even can be led to believe the snare is not a playback track, but I will never believe there is a way of focking keeping the count playing this live. Never. I feel like I've just witnessed the laws of nature suspending themselves for a whole minute.
”Oh, Victoria, I want to spend the rest of my life making love to you!”
“Cool. You going to actually start that anytime now?”
4:32 – 5:13: We're in full blown Sun Ra For Rock Band territory here. I need a live show to be absolutely sure this isn't aleatory composing.
”Turn around!”
“Every now and then a get a little bit lonely and you're never coming round?”
“I said turn around!”
“Every now and then I get a little bit tired of listening to the sound of my tears?”
“What the fock, Victoria!”
“Ha! That was my Bonnie Tyler ass preserver.”
5:13 – 5:55: I can't take this anymore. There comes a point I'm tired of being amazed and need some sort of musical release, especially on an instrumental. Please drop the math display and give me something a mortal can immediately chew. Even swine can get tired of too many pearls I guess.
“What the fock, Ned!”
“Sorry, I misinterpreted Through Her Eyes”
5:55 – 6:13: RUSH? REALLY? THIS IS ALL THAT BUILDUP'S PAYOFF?
Focking brilliant, actually.
”That's it?”
“Yes, girl. Did you think the very last dance would have lasted forever?”
“No, but neither fifty seconds”
Coming Next (after prosecution): 10: One Last Time