Do you believe the woman is the homemaker and the man is the breadwinner?

[73109]

I was watching something on TV today and I found it completely absurd that people, both men and women, believe that the woman is the weaker sex, and belong at home taking care of the kids while the man goes out and makes money. These people actually look down on women making a living for their family and see men as emasuculated if their are Mister Mom. Maybe I am wrong. Do any of you believe this structure should still hold merit?

And I put this in P&R because, if I am not mistaken, this idea comes from the biblical ideal of a woman being her man's "help mate"

[Adami]

No. Sure, there are some biological and social leanings toward those things, but it can all change easily.

[El Barto]

Does TDoL own a whip, by any chance?

Generally not.  It's hard not to notice that the genders are built for different roles.  However,  I don't think there's any reason that people should be pigeon-holed into assigned roles because of silly societal expectations.  

[73109]

Nope. No whip.

I just get pissed when I hear idiot men say that women are the weeker sex and should take care of the kids while he should go out and make money. I know a family where the mother makes 100+ thousand dollars a year and the dad stays home and takes care of...um...4 kids. The worse part is, there are women out there who believe this shit. I don't know, it just pisses me off. I could go further but...I, uh...better not.

[73109]

Double post. Yeah, I know. Just to even out my opinion here. Feminists are just as annoying. Yeah, they can do anything a man can, but you don't need to form clubs and have rallies and just shove it in the face of everyone. Just stick with everyone is equal...is that so fuckin hard? On both sides?

[bosk1]

Depends on the man and the woman.  But you are blending so many different issues together that I don't even know where to begin.

[icysk8r]

Well, technically, the Man is physically stronger.  It's science, not opinion.

However, I think a woman can do anything a man can do just as well.

[hefdaddy42]

Kind of what bosky said.

I mean, in general terms, I think that the traditional male/female roles unnecessarily gender-based.  There is nothing wrong with the wife being the "breadwinner" and the husband being a "househusband" (in fact, this is my dream and - hopefully- someday will be a reality).

However, these roles are not specific to America; they are found in virtually every society I've ever heard of.  I will also say that of all the men and women I've ever known (or even read about), the women are overwhelmingly better suited at running a household than the men are.

Of course, those gender-based roles seem less and less important as divorce rates continue to climb.  It doesn't really matter what role a family member plays if there is no entire family.

[King Postwhore]

I would love for my wife to make more money than me.   Then we could afford more things.  For my wife and I, we are in it together.

[Adami]

I'd love to meet a girl who makes tons of money. I'd be fine staying home and sitting on my couch.

[CountVoorhees]

'The fuck's a breadwinner?

[Adami]

'The fuck's a breadwinner?

Someone who wins bread.

[CountVoorhees]

OH! How dumb of me.

[King Postwhore]

'The fuck's a breadwinner?

Someone who wins bread.

That's groovie man, groovie.

[Adami]

Real men aren't Breadwinners, cause who cares about bread? Real men bring home the bacon, real men are Bacon Rapers.

[bosk1]

real men are Bacon Rapers.

Or BR, for short.

...unless, of course, they're Jews.

[Adami]

Or muslims. We jews are Matzah Men.

[bosk1]

Well, as you know, I renounced Judaism, so I can do whatever I please with my bacon.

[Adami]

Well, as you know, I renounced Judaism, so I can do whatever I please with my bacon.

I'm glad you let a known terrorist like myself create your new....whatever that is under your name.

[yeshaberto]

I love being the bread winner and my wife loves being the homemaker...that is all I know

[Adami]

Considering if the man is the breadwinner, he is bringing home the money to keep up the home, and if the woman is the homemaker, she is the one who is cooking most often......shouldn't the man be the homewinner and the woman be the breadmaker?

[pogoowner]

I think, in general, women are better suited to taking care of the children and maintaining the home. This is not the case in every circumstance, however, and I see no problem with anyone bucking the trend.

[William Wallace]

I have no problem with men and women rejecting traditional gender roles. If cooking and cleaning meant dealing with fewer people as means to make a living, I would certainly make that trade off without hesitation. However, I think efforts to cast the traditional family as something negative are monumentally stupid attempts at social engineering.   

[Sir GuitarCozmo]

woman is the weaker sex, and belong at home taking care of the kids

I do not agree at all with the idea that the woman should be at home taking care of the kids.  In reality, she should be in the kitchen, taking care of my dinner. 

[Super Dude]

I believe individuals of each sex should do what each individual is better suited to. I am not confident in my abilities as a homemaker or in my child-rearing skills. Therefore I personally would not be a very good stay-at-home dad. On the other hand, lots of girls I'm friends with are very motivated and career-oriented, and others can't wait to have and raise kids (my girlfriend is one of the latter).

[emindead]

woman is the weaker sex, and belong at home taking care of the kids

I do not agree at all with the idea that the woman should be at home taking care of the kids.  In reality, she should be in the kitchen, taking care of my dinner.  

Took the words out of my fingers.

[eric42434224]

In todays economy and society, what family can afford to have only one spouse work?

[rumborak]

However, I think efforts to cast the traditional family as something negative are monumentally stupid attempts at social engineering.   

I think it's an inevitable outcome when people try to overcome unjust paradigms that they overshoot a bit. There's no grand scheme of "social engineering" going on.

rumborak

[William Wallace]

However, I think efforts to cast the traditional family as something negative are monumentally stupid attempts at social engineering.   

I think it's an inevitable outcome when people try to overcome unjust paradigms that they overshoot a bit. There's no grand scheme of "social engineering" going on.

rumborak

I'm not suggesting a grand scheme. But there are people intentionally trying to eliminate traditional gender roles from our culture.

[rumborak]

You mean feminists and the like. Yeah, but they always run against a brick wall in the end because the general public knows the value of certain gender roles.

rumborak

[73109]

I believe individuals of each sex should do what each individual is better suited to. I am not confident in my abilities as a homemaker or in my child-rearing skills. Therefore I personally would not be a very good stay-at-home dad. On the other hand, lots of girls I'm friends with are very motivated and career-oriented, and others can't wait to have and raise kids (my girlfriend is one of the latter).

Where to begin...where to begin...I know!!

Call him Cole!

[Tick]

I believe you go with whatever works best. I truly don't think it makes a difference. If you love someone, your a team, and you just make it work.

[TempusVox]

However, I think a woman can do anything a man can do just as well.

Not true! She can't pee her name in the snow as easily as a man can. 

 To the original post~ I would say that most men have some crazy hang up about being the primary wage earner in their home. I know men who really freak out at the thought of their spouse possibly earning more money. It would really surprise you to know who some of them are. Personally, I never valued myself on my net worth. I enjoy earning money, and have earned and still earn quite a bit- but it's just money. Last time I checked, my portrait wasn't on any of it. I would have no qualms if my wife earned more than I did. She earns quite a bit herself, and I believe she has the ability to earn more than me. If she did it would not bother me in the least. But most men are disturbed by this prospect because of social mores and exaggerated expectations placed on them.

[yorost]

I told my wife it'd be great if she had a nice job so I could quit my PhD and just do nothing.  Unfortunately, we just know if she got a job I'd still be stupid enough to keep at it.  We grad students really are the idiots of the world, why do people think we're smart?

[bosk1]

In todays economy and society, what family can afford to have only one spouse work?

It is definitely more challenging nowadays than in at least the recent past, and for a lot of people, it just isn't possible no matter how hard they try.  But I believe that if you have children, it is best for the children if one spouse works in the home (notice I used the term "work" because being a "stay-at-home mom/dad" is anything but a free ride if you are doing it right) as opposed to having outside employment.  We've done that, and it hasn't been easy, but I think it is much better for our children and our family as a whole than having day care/the schools/etc. raise our children instead of us taking the responsibility to be actively involved.  That means we don't have as big a house as a lot of people.  It means we always buy used cars instead of new, and not even remotely anything fancy.  It means less vacations, and cheaper ones.  It means that to earn the kind of money we need as a family to stay ahead on the bills with only one income, I have to work a job that requires a ton of hours and high stress instead of any easiler job that allows me to be home more.  Basically, it entails a lot of sacrifice.  But we do it because we've chosen a particular goal that is not easy to achieve without sacrifice, so we do it.