The Depressed/Angry Thread.

[ReaperKK]

Great post Tio

PotY material right there

[Portrucci]

I personally really like leaning about how happiness works in the brain. Ironically it won't make you any happier, but it does shed some light on the many reasons happiness eludes us. It's seems to be a very misunderstood emotion, especially as to it's causes. Things like the paradox of choice is a good example; That is, for each addition option you are forced to consider, the less satisfied you will be with the option you choose. The paradox lying in the fact nearly every time we will prefer a bigger choice to a smaller one. Also stuff like oppurtunity cost comes in to play; where we often exaggerate in our minds how much better off we would have been if we had chosen the next best option to what we have now.

If you are interested in this subject there is a great TED talk on it: https://www.ted.com/talks/dan_gilbert_asks_why_are_we_happy.html

This post may seem out of place in the depressed thread, and I don't expect it to be anything really helpful but what I am saying is that learning about happiness has personally given me some clarity to quite a few reasons why I've felt like shit in the past.   

[ACID_FOX]

Still here, as I have been for over a year now.  Time really drags on when you're depressed as shit and loathe every minute you're alive.

 

[Arcaeus]

I'm starting to realize that life simply isn't for everybody.

I don't know if this belongs in this thread. I don't think I should post it anywhere. I'm not even sure if I feel depressed anymore, because I don't feel much of anything.

I think I suffer from minor (and getting steadily worse) psychopathy, as in I lack empathy or morals, but the fact that I'm afraid of this makes me believe that perhaps I don't (like they say crazy people don't know they're crazy). Still, I feel that my positive emotions are dead or dying, and the only things I can feel strongly are hatred, jealousy and anxiety.

I still laugh, and care about my close friends, and things like that, but it doesn't feel like it's enough and in most cases... I don't enjoy anything anymore. I'll try to watch movies or write stories or play video games, things I used to love and have so much passion for, but I just experience little to no enjoyment and have no creative drive and get zero emotional response from it all and just give up. My love for music is a bit dulled as well, and though I can still appreciate it more than I do anything else, I'm afraid that's going away too.

I stopped going to school a few years back. I wasn't bullied (much), my life didn't suck, but I had no determination or concentration and I just loathed everyone around me, and it's not that I even wanted to; I wanted to have friends, I wanted to have a social life, but my mind always seemed to target and focus on the negative in people and I just started to hate them for unwarranted reasons. I still do this, and I can't help it, and since I stopped attending school I've had no contact with anyone besides family and family friends (avoiding even them whenever I could, because I hate pretending like I have emotions and care about anything in their lives), and my one friend off of the internet (also my ex-girlfriend, which really fucking hurts, by the way). I'm going crazy from the isolation and while part of me knows I need people to save me from that, the other, more prominent part is still a bitter, whiny misanthrope that just wants everyone to fuck off. And I hate that. I don't want to be that person, but even if I try to fight it, I still am. I can't force myself to care.

There's a silly little voice inside me that says "oh, everything will be better someday, don't worry about a thing", and that's keeping me from slipping into full depression, but how will things get better? I have no education, no friends, I'll have no idea how to get by in life and I'll be an adult soon (if only in age). I know most are thinking "if you don't want to be this kind of person, then shut the hell up and stop", but I can't. I say to myself I want to turn my life around, but thinking I want something and having the actual determination to do so are two different things entirely, and I don't have the latter.

I tried taking antidepressants two years back, but they had no effect on me, and I stopped a few months later. I have such a stoic, passionless, unimaginative view on things, which could be worse, I suppose, but I miss my empathy, creativity and imagination. I want to be happy, I want to enjoy life, but the same dead part of me that says "what's the point in being sad?" also says "what's the point in being happy?".

Every now and then I'll have a sudden, unprompted moment of clarity where I'll be hopeful and full of life and happiness, and have the passion for writing and reading and such that I lost a long time ago along with the determination to move forward with my life that I've been desperately searching for, but then it'll be gone just like that, and I'll be back where I started. Still, those are the moments I live for, as nothing else seems worth it. Otherwise, I just engage in various forms of escapism all day; I'll listen to music, I'll read, I'll play World of Warcraft, anything that can let me be someone other than myself, even if it's only temporarily, even if I don't enjoy those things as much as I once did.

Ugh. Fuck. I just needed to let that out. That's not even half of it but I'll scoop up whatever dignity I have left and end the post here.

tl;dr: pointless whining, disregard this post.

[Slain]

I'm starting to realize that life simply isn't for everybody.

I don't know if this belongs in this thread. I don't think I should post it anywhere. I'm not even sure if I feel depressed anymore, because I don't feel much of anything.

I think I suffer from minor (and getting steadily worse) psychopathy, as in I lack empathy or morals, but the fact that I'm afraid of this makes me believe that perhaps I don't (like they say crazy people don't know they're crazy). Still, I feel that my positive emotions are dead or dying, and the only things I can feel strongly are hatred, jealousy and anxiety.

I still laugh, and care about my close friends, and things like that, but it doesn't feel like it's enough and in most cases... I don't enjoy anything anymore. I'll try to watch movies or write stories or play video games, things I used to love and have so much passion for, but I just experience little to no enjoyment and have no creative drive and get zero emotional response from it all and just give up. My love for music is a bit dulled as well, and though I can still appreciate it more than I do anything else, I'm afraid that's going away too.

I stopped going to school a few years back. I wasn't bullied (much), my life didn't suck, but I had no determination or concentration and I just loathed everyone around me, and it's not that I even wanted to; I wanted to have friends, I wanted to have a social life, but my mind always seemed to target and focus on the negative in people and I just started to hate them for unwarranted reasons. I still do this, and I can't help it, and since I stopped attending school I've had no contact with anyone besides family and family friends (avoiding even them whenever I could, because I hate pretending like I have emotions and care about anything in their lives), and my one friend off of the internet (also my ex-girlfriend, which really fucking hurts, by the way). I'm going crazy from the isolation and while part of me knows I need people to save me from that, the other, more prominent part is still a bitter, whiny misanthrope that just wants everyone to fuck off. And I hate that. I don't want to be that person, but even if I try to fight it, I still am. I can't force myself to care.

There's a silly little voice inside me that says "oh, everything will be better someday, don't worry about a thing", and that's keeping me from slipping into full depression, but how will things get better? I have no education, no friends, I'll have no idea how to get by in life and I'll be an adult soon (if only in age). I know most are thinking "if you don't want to be this kind of person, then shut the hell up and stop", but I can't. I say to myself I want to turn my life around, but thinking I want something and having the actual determination to do so are two different things entirely, and I don't have the latter.

I tried taking antidepressants two years back, but they had no effect on me, and I stopped a few months later. I have such a stoic, passionless, unimaginative view on things, which could be worse, I suppose, but I miss my empathy, creativity and imagination. I want to be happy, I want to enjoy life, but the same dead part of me that says "what's the point in being sad?" also says "what's the point in being happy?".

Every now and then I'll have a sudden, unprompted moment of clarity where I'll be hopeful and full of life and happiness, and have the passion for writing and reading and such that I lost a long time ago along with the determination to move forward with my life that I've been desperately searching for, but then it'll be gone just like that, and I'll be back where I started. Still, those are the moments I live for, as nothing else seems worth it. Otherwise, I just engage in various forms of escapism all day; I'll listen to music, I'll read, I'll play World of Warcraft, anything that can let me be someone other than myself, even if it's only temporarily, even if I don't enjoy those things as much as I once did.

Ugh. Fuck. I just needed to let that out. That's not even half of it but I'll scoop up whatever dignity I have left and end the post here.

tl;dr: pointless whining, disregard this post.

I've felt like that before, to an extent. And the only thing I've found to work, as simple as it seems, is to learn to live with it. You have to try your best to find someone, or something that makes you feel alive, and motivated. I found someone, but it's different for everyone. Maybe even keep yourself busy with things that you used to love and enjoy, and you might find yourself enjoying them again. I've taken antidepressants before too, and I'm with you on that, it doesn't really do much for me.

Can you remember an event that happened that started all of this? I can remember what it was for me, but sometimes it does just happen for no reason. The phrase "Ignorance is Bliss" sometimes means more than people think.

[Dr. DTVT]

Arcaeus, have you thought about just talking to a councilor?  The fact that you see this in yourself says to me you aren't crazy (like you said), but you want something better for yourself.  A lot of times its easier to talk to a stranger (a well qualified one at that) than it is family and friends because you don't worry about them thinking less of you; not that they would of course, but in your mind they would.

It sounds like you need to find something to be passionate about - a purpose.  Feel free to take one or two of my passions, I have to many and I just end up with a lot of half-completed shit, or go get a girl pregnant, that'll give you something constant to work on.

[Marvellous G]

I second the counsellor idea, the fact that you're objectively aware of all of these things about you means that you're not half as lost a case as you think you are. If you were like that and ignorant you should be worried, but the fact that you recognise the problem and want to change means there's hope for you.

[robwebster]

Placeholder. Brb...

[ReaperKK]

Arcaeus, I have felt the same you do at least by reading your post last year. I kept it all to myself and then finally I decided to talk to a therapist. I think that was one of the best experiences in my life, to be able to open up to someone, she really did give some great insight and things that I would've glazed over.

[icysk8r]

Still here, as I have been for over a year now.  Time really drags on when you're depressed as shit and loathe every minute you're alive.

 

OLOLIT'SFUNNYCUZIT'STRUE
 

[CountVoorhees]

Don't Follow by Alice In Chains is horribly depressing.

[Adami]

I've noticed that when I'm depressed I write relaxing soft music.

[Jamesman42]

I've noticed that when I'm depressed I write relaxing soft music.

I've noticed that when I'm depressed, it's because I miss my favorite vulgar Jew.

[Adami]

I've noticed that when I'm depressed I write relaxing soft music.

I've noticed that when I'm depressed, it's because I miss my favorite vulgar Jew.

JIMMY!!!

Wait, I'm not vulgar, I don't even curse!

[Jamesman42]

I have never watched you watch your mouth, but I have watched you wash your mouth.

[chknptpie]

So I'll move my stuff over here from the chat thread.

Found out last night that my friend passed away sometime in the past day or two. One of my friends went home, to find my other friend overdosed. Needless to say I'm a bit of a mess today.

Come to work to give a presentation that I have no idea what I'm doing. My boss doesn't talk to me, inform me, she knows I hate her. After my presentation, my boss goes on and on about how my coworker did hers. My coworker and I work rotating shifts and only see each other on Wednesdays. Its made my life hard and I'm on the brink of a blow up with my boss about it. When the schedule was discussed originally, I expressed my concerns and she stated "If I would have known you would have a problem with this, you wouldn't have got the job". WTF...

Anyways back to today, I said Would have been nice to see, she said you could have asked yesterday. Impossible with only one overlap day, with all meetings and shit, its impossible. She then says I can come in on my day off to see her presentation. WTF. She set up this schedule, I'm working the hours I need to work. But I have to come in on my day off to do bullshit?

Then find out that a chore here at work that my coworker and I need to do daily hasn't been done since I LAST DID IT ON SATURDAY. &#@($^&@)O(I$#^@)

I'm feeling stabby. Can we call this the depressed/anger thread.

[LTE]

I need some advice, not for me, for my girlfriend. We both go to college 300 miles apart but that's not really the problem, in fact the distance hasn't affected much between us. However she has been getting really stressed at school. She wants to be a filmmaker, or do something in the film industry. But she is getting very emotional about all the other classes she is taking, that are useless. She also passed in her first film project today and the teacher and class basically ripped it apart, and criticized all the technicalities of the shots,etc. Something she had never really experienced, and says she will probably fail the class. She called me, crying and doesn't want to be there, doesn't want to do anything, and "wants to leave". We are coming home Columbus Day weekend which is good, but I care about her too much to see her suffer. A few days after columbus day is a meeting for an internship not at the school that really interests her.  She gets emotional sometimes but this is the worst I've seen her. I said she should call her parents but her mom didn't really understand. I thought she could take the semester off and have a mental break, but then she would miss the date for the internship meeting, which still isn't a guarantee. Any other options or ideas? I can't let this stand. 

[Hellholming]

Don't Follow by Alice In Chains is horribly depressing.

but such a good song.

the intro always reminds me of "Finally Free".

[ReaperKK]

I need some advice, not for me, for my girlfriend. We both go to college 300 miles apart but that's not really the problem, in fact the distance hasn't affected much between us. However she has been getting really stressed at school. She wants to be a filmmaker, or do something in the film industry. But she is getting very emotional about all the other classes she is taking, that are useless. She also passed in her first film project today and the teacher and class basically ripped it apart, and criticized all the technicalities of the shots,etc. Something she had never really experienced, and says she will probably fail the class. She called me, crying and doesn't want to be there, doesn't want to do anything, and "wants to leave". We are coming home Columbus Day weekend which is good, but I care about her too much to see her suffer. A few days after columbus day is a meeting for an internship not at the school that really interests her.  She gets emotional sometimes but this is the worst I've seen her. I said she should call her parents but her mom didn't really understand. I thought she could take the semester off and have a mental break, but then she would miss the date for the internship meeting, which still isn't a guarantee. Any other options or ideas? I can't let this stand. 

I've gone through things like this with my gf (who was incredibly emotional) in college, we dated all through college and there were times where she was having a hard time/doubtful about her future at the school. We also did the long distance thing.

My advice for you is to be with her and comfort her but keep her motivated. There were a few times where my gf was ready to drop out simply from the stress of it all but I would give my ear to her and sometimes a few surprise visits really helped.

As for your girlfriend, well I've been at university, failed classes, dropped classes and the whole nine yards. It's tough to stick it out but if it's something that you believe in and enjoy then she should take criticism with a grain of salt. You're going to run into those professor and TA's during your time there but it's all part of school.

[Dr. DTVT]

LTE -

As an college teacher, I can tell you that college is the first time many students get real constructive feedback, and many don't take it well.  When someone is pointing out your mistakes and shortcomings AND IT'S THEIR JOB, you can't take it personally, you can't be dismissive of the criticism, and you have to be willing to learn and adapt.  As a filmmaker, everything she does is going to be scrutinized...hell there is even a profession for it called "film critic", so she's going to need to learn to accept criticism at both the private and public level as well.  She'll have to learn to accept it if that's what she wants to do.  As for failing, students are tend to overly worry about their grade.  Your job is to be supportive, but also keep her in check with reality if you really care about her.  You can't spoon feed her the sugar she wants to hear, you should mix the rational tough-love in with the suuport otherwise she won't be able to deal with a greater volume of stress down the road.

Taking a semester off is a terrible idea.  Its going to raise red flags for any future employer.  They'll find someone who survived the frying pan, not someone who got cooked.

Mental toughness is something that develops over time.  Most people aren't mentally tough, and it sounds like your girl is as soft as a cloud.  She's not going to instantly feel better, but she's going to need to begin to take steps in order to do what she wants to do.  If she can't handle a professor pointing out mistakes, I don't think she could handle a film critic publishing a negative review.

I'm not trying to be a jerk, I'm telling you she needs a reality check, and you may need to deliver some of them.

[HarlequinForest]

/depressed

Failed my first of four Calc II tests, despite studying 2 hours+ a night and having a seemingly firm grasp of the material.  I've also failed all four of my weekly quizzes, despite the same circumstances.  What's most depressing is that I'm basically the worst student in the class, yet I know several people who claim they don't study much at all and do so much better than me; it just makes me feel like an idiot.  I passed Calc I quite easily... I just don't get why I can't do good under this instructor.  Anyways, I felt so bad that I've basically stopped going to class, and I'm going to drop it.

I'll have to decide before next semester if I want to change my major from Electrical Engineering to something else.  I'm too afraid to go into the Engineering job market with a < 3.0 GPA anyways.  I'm thinking Accounting... I don't really know.  No realistically attainable job in the world really interests me.

Anyways, that's just the smallest reason I have for being depressed; I won't pain you all with my pathetic social life.

[Dr. DTVT]

/depressed

Failed my first of four Calc II tests, despite studying 2 hours+ a night and having a seemingly firm grasp of the material.  I've also failed all four of my weekly quizzes, despite the same circumstances.  What's most depressing is that I'm basically the worst student in the class, yet I know several people who claim they don't study much at all and do so much better than me; it just makes me feel like an idiot.  I passed Calc I quite easily... I just don't get why I can't do good under this instructor.  Anyways, I felt so bad that I've basically stopped going to class, and I'm going to drop it.

I'll have to decide before next semester if I want to change my major from Electrical Engineering to something else.  I'm too afraid to go into the Engineering job market with a < 3.0 GPA anyways.  I'm thinking Accounting... I don't really know.  No realistically attainable job in the world really interests me.

Anyways, that's just the smallest reason I have for being depressed; I won't pain you all with my pathetic social life.

Time for me to put the prof hat on again...

If you are studying and coming up short, either your study habits are inneffective - or worse - you misunderstand a concept you think you understand and it's causing problems for everything built upon that concept.  Make an appointment w/ your prof during their office hours.  That's his/her job.  Believe it or not, most of us in the education field are in it because we WANT to teach.  If we wanted to just collect a paycheck, we would do much better in the private sector.  Its always easier to blame the instructor, but unless the entire class doesn't understand something, its usually on you.  No employer wants to hear you shift the blame.  Own up and work on your weaknesses - thats what employers want.

Don't compare yourself to others.  Each of you have different backgrounds, initial learning bases, and different aptitudes, beyond that, as shitty as this may sound - you are not going to be the best at what you do, and the wider your exposure to people you are going to find more and more people who are better than than you at what you do; myself included.  You have to learn to accept that.

As for your GPA, if you're still early enough into your schooling to change majors, you definately have time to improve it.  Very few people graduate with a 4.0.  There is a reason the average grade is considered a C (with grade inflation its more like a B now but that's another story), and that's because you don't have to know everything to be successful.  If everyone was given A's, the reputation of your school would quickly fall to shambles because an employer would have a hard time separating the grain for the chaff.  Most people don't graduate Cum Laude or better from college, and guess what?  They still become gainfully employed.

You can't walk around like Chicken Little and think the sky is going to fall...because if you do it IS going to fall.

[ZBomber]

/depressed

Failed my first of four Calc II tests, despite studying 2 hours+ a night and having a seemingly firm grasp of the material.  I've also failed all four of my weekly quizzes, despite the same circumstances.  What's most depressing is that I'm basically the worst student in the class, yet I know several people who claim they don't study much at all and do so much better than me; it just makes me feel like an idiot.  I passed Calc I quite easily... I just don't get why I can't do good under this instructor.  Anyways, I felt so bad that I've basically stopped going to class, and I'm going to drop it.

I'll have to decide before next semester if I want to change my major from Electrical Engineering to something else.  I'm too afraid to go into the Engineering job market with a < 3.0 GPA anyways.  I'm thinking Accounting... I don't really know.  No realistically attainable job in the world really interests me.

Anyways, that's just the smallest reason I have for being depressed; I won't pain you all with my pathetic social life.

Time for me to put the prof hat on again...

If you are studying and coming up short, either your study habits are inneffective - or worse - you misunderstand a concept you think you understand and it's causing problems for everything built upon that concept.  Make an appointment w/ your prof during their office hours.  That's his/her job.  Believe it or not, most of us in the education field are in it because we WANT to teach.  If we wanted to just collect a paycheck, we would do much better in the private sector.  Its always easier to blame the instructor, but unless the entire class doesn't understand something, its usually on you.  No employer wants to hear you shift the blame.  Own up and work on your weaknesses - thats what employers want.

I've gotta disagree with you there. I think the instructor DOES have a lot to do with it. Doesn't mean its a bad professor. But there are so many different teaching styles, and some work better for others.

[Dr. DTVT]

If most of the class gets it and a few students don't, I'm not changing the way I teach the class.  That's where one-on-one help comes in.  But if I'm not asked for it...well I can't give it.  Blaming someone else is always the ego saving way, and when I was an undergrad I did the same thing.  "I never had a problem with this before, therefore it MUST be Dr. Soandso's fault" is more comforting than, "I need to work harder" or "Maybe I'm not good enough."  In retrospect, I can honestly say I only had one bad professor, and I can say that because I got an A in his class despite his lack of effort and his uncanny ability to side-track himself at the drop of a hat.

Tough love sucks, but it has to be given.

[Portrucci]

/depressed

Failed my first of four Calc II tests, despite studying 2 hours+ a night and having a seemingly firm grasp of the material.  I've also failed all four of my weekly quizzes, despite the same circumstances.  What's most depressing is that I'm basically the worst student in the class, yet I know several people who claim they don't study much at all and do so much better than me; it just makes me feel like an idiot.  I passed Calc I quite easily... I just don't get why I can't do good under this instructor.  Anyways, I felt so bad that I've basically stopped going to class, and I'm going to drop it.

I'll have to decide before next semester if I want to change my major from Electrical Engineering to something else.  I'm too afraid to go into the Engineering job market with a < 3.0 GPA anyways.  I'm thinking Accounting... I don't really know.  No realistically attainable job in the world really interests me.

Anyways, that's just the smallest reason I have for being depressed; I won't pain you all with my pathetic social life.

Just don't do Accounting. Trust me.

I'm 2 years into a double degree of Accounting/Banking and Finance, and while Finance is actually pretty interesting and full of useful life-skills (amortized loans, share portfolios etc), the Accounting is so in depth in terms of recording and amending obscure internal company reports, it will have absolutely no use whatsoever unless I become an accountant which isn't going to happen, so at that point I lose all enthusiasm for study or doing well. Not sure if I should just tough it out (and risk it bringing down my GPA) or drop it, having effectively wasted all that money on those units.

[ZBomber]

If most of the class gets it and a few students don't, I'm not changing the way I teach the class.  That's where one-on-one help comes in.  But if I'm not asked for it...well I can't give it.  Blaming someone else is always the ego saving way, and when I was an undergrad I did the same thing.  "I never had a problem with this before, therefore it MUST be Dr. Soandso's fault" is more comforting than, "I need to work harder" or "Maybe I'm not good enough."  In retrospect, I can honestly say I only had one bad professor, and I can say that because I got an A in his class despite his lack of effort and his uncanny ability to side-track himself at the drop of a hat.

Tough love sucks, but it has to be given.

I'm not saying the professor should change their way of teaching to meet the needs of one or two students, but you don't agree that different students will naturally learn better from different ways of teaching?

[Dr. DTVT]

Yeah, but I don't have time to make give the lecture for those who are visually inclined, auditory inclined, application inclined.  In addition, some subjects lend themselves to certain learning types better than others.  At some point the student has to take responsibility for their work.  If a professor organizes the lecture, uses proper visual aids, communicates clearly, and is willing to engage the student - and almost every professor does these things, they did their job.  The world doesn't cater to each person.  Personal responsibility is more a determining factor for success than the quality of instruction.

[HarlequinForest]

/depressed

Failed my first of four Calc II tests, despite studying 2 hours+ a night and having a seemingly firm grasp of the material.  I've also failed all four of my weekly quizzes, despite the same circumstances.  What's most depressing is that I'm basically the worst student in the class, yet I know several people who claim they don't study much at all and do so much better than me; it just makes me feel like an idiot.  I passed Calc I quite easily... I just don't get why I can't do good under this instructor.  Anyways, I felt so bad that I've basically stopped going to class, and I'm going to drop it.

I'll have to decide before next semester if I want to change my major from Electrical Engineering to something else.  I'm too afraid to go into the Engineering job market with a < 3.0 GPA anyways.  I'm thinking Accounting... I don't really know.  No realistically attainable job in the world really interests me.

Anyways, that's just the smallest reason I have for being depressed; I won't pain you all with my pathetic social life.

Time for me to put the prof hat on again...

If you are studying and coming up short, either your study habits are inneffective - or worse - you misunderstand a concept you think you understand and it's causing problems for everything built upon that concept.  Make an appointment w/ your prof during their office hours.  That's his/her job.  Believe it or not, most of us in the education field are in it because we WANT to teach.  If we wanted to just collect a paycheck, we would do much better in the private sector.  Its always easier to blame the instructor, but unless the entire class doesn't understand something, its usually on you.  No employer wants to hear you shift the blame.  Own up and work on your weaknesses - thats what employers want.

I'm not shifting the blame whatsoever... That's the reason it's depressing to me: it's all my fault.  (Although, I will note that I had to drop my Pre-calculus course with the same teacher, then took Trig with a different teacher and passed extremely easily.  I would have gotten a different teacher for Calc II, but he's the only one that teaches the course...)

Don't compare yourself to others.  Each of you have different backgrounds, initial learning bases, and different aptitudes, beyond that, as shitty as this may sound - you are not going to be the best at what you do, and the wider your exposure to people you are going to find more and more people who are better than than you at what you do; myself included.  You have to learn to accept that.

For sure...  My background consists of a family of dropouts, and, as much as I love them, they really did absolutely nothing to help me become a good student throughout all of my schooling, and I really resent them for it.  I didn't start to enjoy school until I enroll and college, and basically had to learn how to be a student from scratch, and I'm still learning, obviously.

As for your GPA, if you're still early enough into your schooling to change majors, you definately have time to improve it.  Very few people graduate with a 4.0.  There is a reason the average grade is considered a C (with grade inflation its more like a B now but that's another story), and that's because you don't have to know everything to be successful.  If everyone was given A's, the reputation of your school would quickly fall to shambles because an employer would have a hard time separating the grain for the chaff.  Most people don't graduate Cum Laude or better from college, and guess what?  They still become gainfully employed.

I've already taken 53 credit hours so far, but I still haven't gotten my Associate's.  I had already changed my majors once, from Graphic Design to Engi.  But the reason this was a concern for me is because, from what I've read, engineering is a profession that puts a primary emphasis on GPA for entry-level positions, and that your GPA follows you throughout your entire career, unlike many other professions.  I've read horror stories of those that have graduated with 2.5-2.9 GPAs.

Just don't do Accounting. Trust me.

I'm 2 years into a double degree of Accounting/Banking and Finance, and while Finance is actually pretty interesting and full of useful life-skills (amortized loans, share portfolios etc), the Accounting is so in depth in terms of recording and amending obscure internal company reports, it will have absolutely no use whatsoever unless I become an accountant which isn't going to happen, so at that point I lose all enthusiasm for study or doing well. Not sure if I should just tough it out (and risk it bringing down my GPA) or drop it, having effectively wasted all that money on those units.

I've been working on my 2-year degree for 3 years now due to having switched majors, and I'm not sure if I can afford to switch Accounting and then switch to something else if I don't enjoy it.  I'll certainly have to think about it... I'll probably be 5 years in before I even get my Associate's, then at least another two years for Bachelor's.  So probably 7 years in total.  Sad.

[bout to crash]

Taking a semester off is a terrible idea.  Its going to raise red flags for any future employer.  They'll find someone who survived the frying pan, not someone who got cooked.

I agree about the criticism thing, but have to disagree here.

If somebody needs a semester off, it's much better to take it than to stay in school when you can't handle it and then fuck up. A withdrawal on your transcript looks better than a failure... and potential employers do not look at your transcript anyway; they look at your resume. I withdrew from a semester of undergrad and then took the next semester off. I still got into almost every grad school I applied to. They didn't care about time off because my grades were still good and I have my shit together now, even if I didn't in 2004... and employers in the future are not going to even know I took time off, so that's completely irrelevant.

[Pyroph]

You're in psychology, right Jackie? How strenuous was the process of applying for grad school? I don't think I can get in, my GPA's too low, but insight would be cool.

I'm a junior now (undergrad) and this semester I started working in the lab on a few pretty fun studies. I also began working, and I think I may have put too much on my schedule... failed one of my first tests and did merely okay in another. I'm still really unsure of what I want to do in my career. My parents are pretty clueless on the whole college thing, so it's been pretty stressful managing it sometimes.

I don't have many friends, and I pretty much talk to them online (one lives back at home, and the other goes to my school but doesn't do much but play WoW, yay... we don't even hang out IRL, I know, it's fucking weird). I've always had trouble opening up to people, and like Arcaeus said above, I can get in moods where I latch onto stupid things about people and hate them for it. I've always been aversive to obnoxious people, and I think it's been ingrained into my head. Alcohol has never appealed to me, and the mass reverence that it gets just irritates me now. Most of the people that live in my dorm are the typical drunk business guy so it's hard to relate.

/rant

[Cecilia]

On Monday, I moved from my parents' house in NY to be with my boyfriend in Las Vegas.

I have no family, no dogs (had to leave my two dachshunds at home), and no friends here. My boyfriend went back to work on Thursdays, so I'm alone from when he leaves at 7:30am-6:30pm (when he gets home).

I don't have a car, I don't know where the hell I am (though I know where Target is), and I'm freaking lonely.

I'm happy to be here, but I'm really homesick. I miss my family. 

[ReaperKK]

On Monday, I moved from my parents' house in NY to be with my boyfriend in Las Vegas.

I have no family, no dogs (had to leave my two dachshunds at home), and no friends here. My boyfriend went back to work on Thursdays, so I'm alone from when he leaves at 7:30am-6:30pm (when he gets home).

I don't have a car, I don't know where the hell I am (though I know where Target is), and I'm freaking lonely.

I'm happy to be here, but I'm really homesick. I miss my family. 

See if you can get yourself into some hobby classes, or are you planning on going to work.

I've picked up and moved to places where I knew no body and I made it fine over time, you just have to force yourself to get out.

[icysk8r]

Still here.  Haven't left. Not even for a minute.

[Cecilia]

See if you can get yourself into some hobby classes, or are you planning on going to work.

I've picked up and moved to places where I knew no body and I made it fine over time, you just have to force yourself to get out.

I'm looking for a job, but the unemployment rate here is high. Also waiting for my NV driver's license to come in the mail, maybe next week. Also have no money because I'm waiting for my bank card, and my checks will take one week to clear. Argh so frustrating and upsetting that I can't do anything yet.

[Marvellous G]

Get ready for a long rant which you should all tl;dr, I just need to get it off my chest.

My family is seriously dysfunctional. Not in the traditional sense of course, we're really well off and we have everything we could possibly want, my parents are great to me and my sister and they've never been unfair or done anything to hurt us.

BUT, psychologically, we just do not mesh. My mum's obsessed with pointing out how much 'work' she's done when she's just at home all day doing chores that other housewives do all day without a word about it, and we're all forced to bite our tongues because any mention of this would probably earn us the most enormous character assassination of all time. Which, by the way, happen constantly to me and my sister due to the most arbitrary of reasons. Last week my mum called me a little shit for politely asking her not to sit and stare at me while I baked a cake for my Ethics homework.

Now, this will sound like the typical 'I'm always in the right' teenager, but here it's really not. I admit in the past I've been in the wrong more often than not, but in the last few months I've made sure that I'm constantly objectively assessing what I'm saying in these all-too-frequent family WARS, and to make sure that what I say is actually very reasonable and mature if relayed to a third party. This hasn't worked.

For instance, take my 20 year old sister, who is now theoretically an adult and only staying here until she goes back to Cambridge on Saturday. My mum just told me that we were probably going to have her boyfriend's entire family round to stay at our house by the sea (see, we're privileged, I'm not denying that) and I replied, incredibly calmly, 'I'd rather not be there, that would be a bit awkward.'

And boom. My sister explodes. Seriously, this has turned into her and my mum tag teaming me while I sit there calmly and am told how ungenerous a person I am. Of course, this is all being yelled at me while I sit there and take it for fear of a worse reprisal than I'm already enduring. Then my sister goes to her room and I go to mine, and, just like always, my mum comes up and tearfully tells me to apologise. Now, despite the fact I genuinely feel that I've done nothing worth apologising for here, I go into my sister's room and say 'I'm genuinely really sorry about what I said, I didn't mean it like that.' She glares at me and I go back to my room and begin to listen to my Depressed playlist for the waytoomanyth time. Then my mum comes in ten minutes later and tells me to apologise. 'What?' I say. 'I already said an apology that I genuinely meant!' (hmm, maybe not true there, but it seemed true at the time) 'Then why is she crying?!' My mum says, emotionally blackmailing me into a second pointless apology. Which I do, again, but my sister goes 'WHY ARE YOU SORRY?!' and it goes on like this with me just leaving and saying 'I REALLY DIDN'T MEAN IT TO OFFEND YOU, I JUST THOUGHT IT MIGHT BE AWKWARD.' Of course, I am a horrific monstrosity of a person by now.

Anyway I'm rambling. Long story short here, I'm now upstairs CRYING for the first time in ages, not just laughs at it like a real man would, playing along to Buying New Soul. My sister's crying and probably bitching about me to her friend/boyfriend next door, and my mum's crying because she just came in and I told her that I hated how this always happened and despite my numerous reassurances to the contrary, she thinks it's her fault and she's a terrible mother.

And what's worst is that I feel guilty for it. One of my best friend's dad is insane and hit his mum, and refuses to get a divorce, etc and this friend NEVER whines. I whine all the time, and my situations infinitely better. Maybe it's just the equivalent of depression guilt, but it's not fair on him or anyone else to whine about this when there's nothing really wrong except me overanalysing our personalities and dwelling on it.

tl;dr, I'm a lot lot lot happier at school than at home. Rant over.