The Depressed/Angry Thread.

[Adami]

I've been feeling pretty great for about 2 months now, but I can feel the depression coming back.

Damnit.

[Ħ]

Run. (seriously)

Get high off that dopamine.

[Adami]

Run. (seriously)

Get high off that dopamine.

Nah. The past 2 months have been me getting high off the work I've been doing on my CD. I'm afraid running away from the problem just isn't going to cut it.

[Fiery Winds]

Fiery Winds, can you not work a part time job alongside studyding? It sounds in your position like going back to school and getting skilled up might be your best bet right now...

Possibly, but it's not likely that working ~20 hours a week will be able to cover my bills and rent.

[nightmare_cinema]

That really sucks. Can you get a roommate? Move into a house share situation? I'm doing a full time 2 year placement/teaching based MA atm and having to work around 25 hours at a couple of jobs to just about scrape by in my shared house... the exhaustion sucks at times but at least it's only for the short term.

[Fiery Winds]

Already have a roommate in the 2 bedroom place we got now, haha.   It's a 1 year lease that ends next June, so we're kinda stuck here, but the price we're paying is actually really good compared to most places in the SF Bay Area.

[Dr. DTVT]

Lonestar is looking for a roommate I hear

[Akasha]

Lonestar is looking for a roommate I hear

That he is.

[snapple]

I feel 99.5% paralyzed right now. I spend the .5% of the time I don't feel paralyzed to try and make myself feel better. Not having a job sucks, and there is nothing in this town. I'm not taking my meds because they're too expensive. Also, I've been drinking a lot. Ugh, not a good week.

[Akasha]

I feel 99.5% paralyzed right now. I spend the .5% of the time I don't feel paralyzed to try and make myself feel better. Not having a job sucks, and there is nothing in this town. I'm not taking my meds because they're too expensive. Also, I've been drinking a lot. Ugh, not a good week.

I'm so sorry that you are still jobless. I know meds are expensive, but found a way to get them. There are companies that will help you or even clinics. I didn't take my meds for a little over a week and I was ready to end it all again. Drinking will just make your depression worse. Hang in there. 

[carl320]

You know what I hate about feeling depressed?  When I feel like I want to talk about it,  I realize as I'm thinking it that it sounds petty and stupid, especially compared to "real" problems other people have.  I also realize that I'm the reason why I'm in the situation that's causing my depression and I haven't done anything about it.  I try to make myself feel better by saying I have goals to fix the situation but it seems like a lot of other things in my life, where I say I have goals and am going to do something, but they never come to fruition.

/post that really doesn't say anything

[snapple]

You know what I hate about feeling depressed?  When I feel like I want to talk about it,  I realize as I'm thinking it that it sounds petty and stupid, especially compared to "real" problems other people have.  I also realize that I'm the reason why I'm in the situation that's causing my depression and I haven't done anything about it.  I try to make myself feel better by saying I have goals to fix the situation but it seems like a lot of other things in my life, where I say I have goals and am going to do something, but they never come to fruition.

/post that really doesn't say anything

Your problems are never smaller than anyone else's.

[Ħ]

Gotta be honest and vocalize something. I am really falling apart at the seams here.

This quarter at school, I have been a complete bum. I haven't been going to lecture, I haven't been doing my work on time, and now I'm paying the price. It's finals time. I'm trying to work on a take-home final exam for philosophy of mind by going through the lecture slides. It's due tonight at midnight via online submission. Not only that, I have two 5 page papers due in the next two days on subjects I know nothing about. I have become way too arrogant in my work ethic since coming to college. And I don't know how to snap out of it.

Not only that, but over this past year, I fell completely out of shape. I didn't work out and ate really bad. I gained about 5% body fat and feel terrible and groggy. I tried running but I pulled my hamstring. I want more than anything to be where I was four years ago.

Lastly, I am very sure I have developed major self-destructive tendencies. I sleep way too much (more than 10 hours on average), stay in bed on the computer for probably 3 hours a day, and hide away from people when I see them. Even here on these forums, I've noticed that my posts have gotten meaner compared to when I first joined. I have resorted to talking to myself on lonely walks and bike rides. I can't take it. I have definitely changed over these past few years for the worse, and I desperately need to snap out of it. And now I'm spewing my guts all over the internet to anonymous people I don't really know. But I gotta get out of here.

[lateralus88]

Don't feel bad about talking to yourself, it's something many people do (happy or sad). I do it all the fucking time, and I'm a pretty happy human being (though I mean, I'm fucking weird and batshit nutty so whatever).


It's easy to fall in a slump, and hard to get out. But think of both what is at stake *cough*yourwellbeing* and the rewards to working towards bettering yourself and your everyday habits.


Lastly, https://www.reddit.com/r/howtonotgiveafuck

[Cyclopssss]

Man, I've been complete fucking interviews with myself for most of my life. It's ridiculous, but I don't think I'm going insane or anything. As long as you talk to some real people on a  regular basis, you'll probably be alright.

[Akasha]

So fuckin pissed off at the world today and very pissed at myself. 

[wolfandwolfandwolf]

So fuckin pissed off at the world today and very pissed at myself. 

This, this, this, this, this. Not feeling it today.

[Akasha]

 

So fuckin pissed off at the world today and very pissed at myself. 

This, this, this, this, this. Not feeling it today.

 

[Super Dude]

My brother in high school is failing almost all of his classes. I know it's not really my business if he doesn't care to do better, but it's really frustrating because I'm really worried about him. He could end up being the only one of us who doesn't go to college.

[Akasha]

A few days okay The Mirror brought me to tears. It was the first time that song brought me to tears. I'm just not sure how my friends did forgive me after all I have put them through the last few years. All my drug use and hospitalizations, suicide attempts, cutting, starving myself, and breaking many promises.

[toro]

So I took a test at school, and I have all the signs of a depressed person. But I really don't feel bad or anything, I just feel the same way I have always felt in my life.

[Adami]

So I took a test at school, and I have all the signs of a depressed person. But I really don't feel bad or anything, I just feel the same way I have always felt in my life.

Then ignore the test results. Trust me.

[toro]

So I took a test at school, and I have all the signs of a depressed person. But I really don't feel bad or anything, I just feel the same way I have always felt in my life.

Then ignore the test results. Trust me.

Oh I do ignore them, but that still made me wonder  how I can come across to some people. I mean, I'm not the most upbeat person, in fact I'm kind of an old sould on a young body kind of guy. Still that made me wonder if I look depressed to some people.

[carl320]

Well it's been a night.  My ex-wife (with whom I'm still really close friends) is suicidal.  I've been texting and talking to her and she went to the ER.  Well, they're going to commit her for a day and this is making things worse for her.  I'm really worried.  I don't know what I can do since I live 4 hours away.  I'm glad I've been able to help her so far, but I don't know what else I can do.  It seems like it's counterproductive to commit someone who's suicidal; it doesn't help to get to the problem.  I can see it being partly to protect her and to let her try and sleep on it, but in the morning she's going to feel worse, thinking that she's ruined Christmas for everyone    I'm going to call her tomorrow to see how she feels.

I just needed this off my chest.

[Dr. DTVT]

I've come to the conclusion that it will be easier to hate most people than hate myself, so society can fuck off.

[Adami]

Quite depressed. Damn heartache.

[Dr. DTVT]

Right there with ya Jew buddy

[Kotowboy]

So yeah - 2012 has been one of the most depressing years I can remember.

Only really got better this past month.

Hey ho - Pip & Dandy etc.   

At least I survived the apocalypse. That's Something. 

[carl320]

So yeah - 2012 has been one of the most depressing years I can remember.

I agree

I think 2013 will be a break out year for me (I have some goals that can possibly be attained, so I'm hopeful).

[wkiml]

2012 can't end soon enough for me

Mom's has been in the hospital for 2 weeks now ( lungs are failing from Chemotherapy received 35 years ago and smoking) She has been moving back and forth between a regualr room and CCU

Saturday she was conherent enough to express to the doctors treating her she wanted to sign a DNR

Been making treks almost daily from work (Manhattan) to the hospital (Brooklyn) than back home (New Jersey)

One day she's fine the next it seems like she's on her death bed , doctors have been no help other than telling us to hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.

I appreciate their bluntness and having been through this earlier in the year with my ex-wife I'm kind of calloused to everything . My sister has been an absolute wreck and only makes things worse by not facing the facts , that mom will be leaving us soon.

[DebraKadabra]

Oh man... sorry to hear about your Mom, Bill.

[jingle.boy]

Shit man, that sucks largely.  It's been a rough haul for you this year for sure.  Hope things start looking up soon for you and the boys.

[nightmare_cinema]

2012 can't end soon enough for me

Mom's has been in the hospital for 2 weeks now ( lungs are failing from Chemotherapy received 35 years ago and smoking) She has been moving back and forth between a regualr room and CCU

Saturday she was conherent enough to express to the doctors treating her she wanted to sign a DNR

Been making treks almost daily from work (Manhattan) to the hospital (Brooklyn) than back home (New Jersey)

One day she's fine the next it seems like she's on her death bed , doctors have been no help other than telling us to hope for the best but be prepared for the worst.

I appreciate their bluntness and having been through this earlier in the year with my ex-wife I'm kind of calloused to everything . My sister has been an absolute wreck and only makes things worse by not facing the facts , that mom will be leaving us soon.

I'm really sorry to hear about your Mom, bud. When I lost mine I was in a similar position to you, I was on the edge of accepting it and calm, but my brother was a total wreck who just couldn't face up to it. It's really horrible when you know it's coming, but don't know when. So many heartbreaks and traumas on top of each other do eventually numb and desensitise you to the heartache I think. Don't feel bad about being calloused. I hope the situation resolves itself somehow soon and that you're going to be okay.

[nightmare_cinema]

2012 has been mental... I've spent months of it on morphine patches off my face, nearly lost my job, changed careers by starting a full time MA, had my heart broken out of the blue by someone who I thought I was gonna be with forever, moved house twice (once overnight against my will), become estranged from my sociopath brother, spent weeks on tenterhooks awaiting a court case that came very close to having serious repercussions, and spent too much time really sick in and out of the doctors' surgery and hospital...

I JUST WISH FOR A DULL, MUNDANE, BORING, AVERAGE, NORMAL 2013

[jingle.boy]

Hope you get your wish Faye.