Gotta be honest and vocalize something. I am really falling apart at the seams here.
This quarter at school, I have been a complete bum. I haven't been going to lecture, I haven't been doing my work on time, and now I'm paying the price. It's finals time. I'm trying to work on a take-home final exam for philosophy of mind by going through the lecture slides. It's due tonight at midnight via online submission. Not only that, I have two 5 page papers due in the next two days on subjects I know nothing about. I have become way too arrogant in my work ethic since coming to college. And I don't know how to snap out of it.
Not only that, but over this past year, I fell completely out of shape. I didn't work out and ate really bad. I gained about 5% body fat and feel terrible and groggy. I tried running but I pulled my hamstring. I want more than anything to be where I was four years ago.
Lastly, I am very sure I have developed major self-destructive tendencies. I sleep way too much (more than 10 hours on average), stay in bed on the computer for probably 3 hours a day, and hide away from people when I see them. Even here on these forums, I've noticed that my posts have gotten meaner compared to when I first joined. I have resorted to talking to myself on lonely walks and bike rides. I can't take it. I have definitely changed over these past few years for the worse, and I desperately need to snap out of it. And now I'm spewing my guts all over the internet to anonymous people I don't really know. But I gotta get out of here.