The Depressed/Angry Thread.

[ReaperKK]

Goddamn I hate putting faith into something and then realizing that all you're doing is taking a step forward while taking 2 steps back.

[Dark Master Of Sin]

My problems pale in comparison to you guys'

Any problem is equally a problem.

[Adami]

Goddamn I hate putting faith into something and then realizing that all you're doing is taking a step forward while taking 2 steps back.

It's amazing how little help one can give with no details. Unless of course you're discussing shoots and latters or something.

[ReaperKK]

Naw, I don't really need help, I just needed to write something down because I was on DTF when it all went down and I figured I'd write something.

I know what needs to be done, I just don't want to do it :/ It involves my ex simply put, and I need to just cut her out of my life. I keep letting her sneak back in.

[Adami]

So it doesn't involve chutes and latters?

[ReaperKK]

If only it did

[Adami]

You know, it still can.

[bout to crash]

I like the way you think.

[ReaperKK]

I like the way you think.

Hrmm, I'll look into it  . . . .

[ReaperKK]

For now all I will say is FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!

I'll add some details later

[icysk8r]

Still here.  Still depressed.  My life is so messed up right now, I have random panic attacks, or anxiety attacks, I don't know what they are, all the time.  I start to hypoventalate (sp) and my heart pounds heavy and I feel like I can't breathe and everything is dizzy and I just want to hurt things.  I don't like them. Therapy isn't helping much, since my therapists asks me questions, but doesn't give me any answers.  He is the only one getting information about me, I am not getting information about me.
Sigh..

[ReaperKK]

You should look getting some anti-anxiety medicine, panic attacks are horrible and should be treated seriously.

[Tuneman]

Still here.  Still depressed.  My life is so messed up right now, I have random panic attacks, or anxiety attacks, I don't know what they are, all the time.  I start to hypoventalate (sp) and my heart pounds heavy and I feel like I can't breathe and everything is dizzy and I just want to hurt things.  I don't like them. Therapy isn't helping much, since my therapists asks me questions, but doesn't give me any answers.  He is the only one getting information about me, I am not getting information about me.
Sigh..

wait so why is your life messed up? What is the cause of the panic attacks/depression?

[icysk8r]

I won't say that much on a public forum.  It's just a lot of shit has happened in a very short amount of time.  Since the end of november my life has been getting worse and worse.  No, this isn't some teen drama stuff, this is more serious stuff.  I just want my life to be back to the way it was, but that won't happen.  That can never happen after all I've experienced.

[Super Dude]

It's a dreary day today.  My girlfriend told me last night that she had a grandmother that passed away three years ago that she was very close to, and today would've been her grandmother's birthday.  It's affecting her pretty strongly.  In addition, my best friend's girlfriend just found out last night that one of her closest guy friends from back home was killed in a car crash.

[Jamesman42]

Sweet, I am feeling majorly depressed.

[ReaperKK]

Sweet, I am feeling majorly depressed.

What's up?

It's a dreary day today.  My girlfriend told me last night that she had a grandmother that passed away three years ago that she was very close to, and today would've been her grandmother's birthday.  It's affecting her pretty strongly.  In addition, my best friend's girlfriend just found out last night that one of her closest guy friends from back home was killed in a car crash.

Sorry to hear that, just stay by your gf's side and give her comfort. Let her go at her own pace.

[Shadow2222]

I'm not super depressed like I was a few weeks ago, but man do I feel lonely. It is so hard to find a gay guy in this school. I know its my senior year and I can wait, but I dunno... I just feel REALLY lonely.

[ReaperKK]

Senior in high school? I understand it can be hard, I don't know how old you are but maybe try a dating site, like plentyoffish.com?

[lonestar]

I'm not super depressed like I was a few weeks ago, but man do I feel lonely. It is so hard to find a gay guy in this school. I know its my senior year and I can wait, but I dunno... I just feel REALLY lonely.

Just show some patience till you get out of high school.  Things do become more open after.

[ReaperKK]

I agree with lonestar, it's so funny how different things are after high school. My post High School years are definitely the best times of my life.

[sonatafanica]

I don't feel that great.

All I've ever wanted to do is write music and sing and whatever, but I just feel so bad about myself that I feel like I wont ever amount to anything. Today I even just screwed around and recorded noises and posted that in the creative works subforum. It feels like I'll never write a song again.

I just think I would feel better if I had something to make me feel better about.

[lonestar]

I don't feel that great.

All I've ever wanted to do is write music and sing and whatever, but I just feel so bad about myself that I feel like I wont ever amount to anything. Today I even just screwed around and recorded noises and posted that in the creative works subforum. It feels like I'll never write a song again.

I just think I would feel better if I had something to make me feel better about.

*smacks upside the head*

Dude, you are an incredably intelligent and talented person.  Show some patience and take the time for your natural gifts to come to fruition.  And never forget that art is first and foremost done for one's own self, the rest of us are just beneficiaries.

[sonatafanica]

That actually made me feel a bit better. Thank you. 

[lonestar]

That actually made me feel a bit better. Thank you. 

[Jamesman42]

I'm not super depressed like I was a few weeks ago, but man do I feel lonely. It is so hard to find a gay guy in this school. I know its my senior year and I can wait, but I dunno... I just feel REALLY lonely.

I know it may not help much, but I echo what lonestar and reaperkk said. Dude, life after high school is way better. Of course, there will be some growing pains there as well, but the good outweighs the bad by far.

I don't feel that great.

All I've ever wanted to do is write music and sing and whatever, but I just feel so bad about myself that I feel like I wont ever amount to anything. Today I even just screwed around and recorded noises and posted that in the creative works subforum. It feels like I'll never write a song again.

I just think I would feel better if I had something to make me feel better about.

Music is an art, and I'm learning this fact myself more and more. I write music as well, and play in a band at church.

I've found that when you do NOT do it for fame/success/money, the pleasure truly is yours, it becomes a lot more fun, and it shows in the music you do. That also becomes a lot more attractive and will gain you fans that can share in your fun and experience. Live life, dude, don't try to gain life.

Sweet, I am feeling majorly depressed.

What's up?

I am feeling general loneliness. I'm trying not to vent to my IRL friends because it seems awkward. You guys are my friends as well, but a bit of anonymity and online community lets me vent easier, ya know?

Like, all of a sudden a lot of my friends are dating, and I feel abandoned. It's not their fault; we are all busy anyways with school, work, church, and stuff, but seeing them have something I'd also like to have. . .it just puts crap into perspective and can get me down.

I need to learn to be more optimistic and not focus on stuff like that. I know that already. I just break down every once in a while. I'll get my own girl one day again, I have faith in God for that.

[lonestar]

As we all know, music helps depression.  I just wantted to share the lyrics of one song in particular that helps me out a lot.....

Speak My Name by I.Q.
Whenever I was silenced, when I was on my own
A brutal cold existence, I believed I was gone
Now I stand no longer nameless
Though I've lost more than I'll find
A simple moment set aside
And I feel like I'm mine
There are times when I remember
But in my heart I'm not the same
And I feel myself connected
Every time you speak my name
You speak my name
Without the darkness in my soul
With arms to call my own
I face a future unafraid
And I won't be alone
There's a place where all my dreaming
Will free me from what I became
And I know no-one can reach me
Every time you speak my name
You speak my name
There are times when I remember
But in my heart I'm not the same
And I feel myself protected
Every time you speak my name
You speak my name

[icysk8r]

I don't feel that great.

All I've ever wanted to do is write music and sing and whatever, but I just feel so bad about myself that I feel like I wont ever amount to anything. Today I even just screwed around and recorded noises and posted that in the creative works subforum. It feels like I'll never write a song again.

I just think I would feel better if I had something to make me feel better about.

ALL OF THIS.  You would think that with all of this depression, I would have a lot to write about but I can't write at all.  I'm so depressive that I can't even write because I can't describe how I'm feeling.  Maybe I'm just not a good writer.

[Pyroph]

Emailed a friend I met when I first got to college that I stopped hanging around with since last year and it's been bugging me so I emailed her last night. She still hasn't replied. 

[ReaperKK]

I am feeling general loneliness. I'm trying not to vent to my IRL friends because it seems awkward. You guys are my friends as well, but a bit of anonymity and online community lets me vent easier, ya know?

Like, all of a sudden a lot of my friends are dating, and I feel abandoned. It's not their fault; we are all busy anyways with school, work, church, and stuff, but seeing them have something I'd also like to have. . .it just puts crap into perspective and can get me down.

I need to learn to be more optimistic and not focus on stuff like that. I know that already. I just break down every once in a while. I'll get my own girl one day again, I have faith in God for that.

I can totally relate to you. For me the start of January was great but things are going downhill, it seems if I take one step forward and then two or three steps back a few days later. This is all referencing my relationships with other people.

What bothers me is I'm having a hell of a year otherwise, I've made over $10k in my trading in the past few months, I'm graduating from UF in a few months and I'm going to Miami to shop for an apartment (I may even consider buy a house with my mom as a co-signer). Financially, I'm 23, and I'm well off, I have all my things together but none of it makes me happy, at all.

My best quality is my optimism, my patience, and how I keep faith (I'm not religious, just faith in general goodness of people) but for the first time in my life it's disappearing, my optimism, patience and faith and that is what is getting me down. I really just want to get my friends and family in order.

Anyway sorry for going off on my own tangent but I still say keep your chin up, it may be a dark hour but time never stops and you keep moving forward.

[Marvellous G]

Not really that bad of a situation objectively, but my guitar exam grade 6 snuck up on me, and is in 2 weeks. I know little theory and have never taken a music exam before, and I can't imagine how embarassing it will be if I fail. Which I might. 

[Adami]

Not really that bad of a situation objectively, but my guitar exam grade 6 snuck up on me, and is in 2 weeks. I know little theory and have never taken a music exam before, and I can't imagine how embarassing it will be if I fail. Which I might. 

Are you in 6th grade or did I totally misread that?

[Marvellous G]

No sorry I worded it badly, I'm doing a Grade 6 exam. Maybe they use a different system here in the UK or something?

[Adami]

No sorry I worded it badly, I'm doing a Grade 6 exam. Maybe they use a different system here in the UK or something?

I just know in Canada they called 6th grade, grade 6.  My bad.

[icysk8r]

My life has changed so much in the past....since november.  I don't feel like counting.  And that is exactly the problem.  I don't feel like doing anything.  I feel like just laying down and staying there forever.  Back before, I used to be happy, and I used to care about stuff.  I careed about getting good grades, keeping up relationships and friends, and cared about myself.  Now I have like a C average and am failing some classes.  I have been cutting classes. I even took blank hall passes so I could do it.  I don't care if my friends stay, well I kinda do, but not really.  But oh well.  This is how it's gonna be for a while.  Just thought I should give an update if anyone cares.