Second Life

[Tick]

I need to be explained why this virtual online deal is such an obsessive phenomenon? I ask because I know a very successful seemingly well grounded 50 year old man whose marriage is going down the tubes, and one of the reasons his beautiful wife states is because of his obsession with this game. He is consumed with it for hours on end. This is a guy who has is own business and is also a incredible artist, musician, and photographer. I know few people blessed with more talents then this guy is. His wife is a young (30's)European beauty who is very in love with this man.
Now, my assumption would be there must be other problems that have led there marriage to the brink, but I can't grasp the power this has over him.
Now I see there is a documentary movie about peoples obsession with second life and how its destroying lives and relationships.
Now I'm very intrigued to know what the draw is?
Does anyone do this and can you explain to me why its so addictive?
I want some perceptive so I can possibly understand the whole thing.

[GuineaPig]

What's not to understand?  Some people have vices that ruin their lives.  Alcohol, drugs, gambling, etc.  I don't see how computer games are radically different.

[Orbert]

I think there's a potential for anyone, no matter how amazing their life may seem to others, to become bored with it and take it for granted.  At some point, that gorgeous woman becomes just your wife.  It doesn't help that you've had a couple of fights and disagreements along the way, as all couples do, but no one else sees that.  They just think "What the fuck is wrong with him?  She's beautiful and nice and smart and talented..."  It doesn't matter.

Same with the awesome car, the huge house, the amazing HDTV and surround sound home theater... after a while it's just your stuff.  Your awesome car has that one problem that's always bugged you and made it less than perfect.  You can't really complain, but it's always bothered you.  Your house is awesome, but there's that one issue where at a certain time of day, the sun comes in that one window, reflects off the hardwood floor, and blinds you when you walk into the room.  And so on.

Meanwhile there's this virtual other world, this "second life" which is completely different.  It's whatever you want it to be, but it also has its own rules and doesn't always do what you might think.  It's intriguing at first, exciting to learn all about it, and finally addicting because it's an escape from the life you've grown accustomed to and taken for granted.  Sometimes the "perfect" is better than the "imperfect" even if the imperfect is much nicer in many ways.  Sometimes just doing or having something different is automatically better.

Now, combine that with a psychological predisposition to obsessive behavior, and you have a recipe for disaster.  Not everyone who plays the Second Life has it, in fact statistically it's probably very few.  But for those few, it's bad.  In a large enough sample population, you're going to find just about every possible outcome, and that includes some guy with a life any of us would love to have ignoring it all to spend his time online.

[Sir GuitarCozmo]

I've played Sims 2 for hours on end before.  It is extremely strangely addicting to sit around and dictate how the life of the virtual person you have created is to be lived.  I couldn't see it ever getting in the way of life, though.  Some people are really susceptible to an addiction that kinda thing, where it's so strangely enjoyable to live a virtual life that's free of bills, and trouble, and bullshit, that it becomes a necessary release from the troubles of the real world.

EDIT:  Or what Orbert said.

[Tick]

What's not to understand?  Some people have vices that ruin their lives.  Alcohol, drugs, gambling, etc.  I don't see how computer games are radically different.

I asked because I don't really understand the draw of video games. Just seemed like a good conversation? Sorry.

I have an addictive personality when it comes to drugs, alcohol, etc. As a kid who grew up in extreme dysfunction at home, so these vises were perfect remedy's to ease the pain. I guess that's why I find those addictions are easy to understand for me.
I guess its hard for me to understand why the guy who seemingly has it all would be so consumed with virtual reality.

Orbert's response puts it perspective nicely. Sometimes, nothing is quite good enough. I do understand that.

[Sir GuitarCozmo]

the guy who seemingly has it all

Seemingly.  People can put up a pretty spectacular facade, even around their best friends, while their life is falling down around them on the inside.  As you've noted, there's clearly other issues in this guy's life, that aren't readily apparent in the image he projects to others.

[j]

Very good post, Orbert.

-J

[Tick]

Very good post, Orbert.

-J

It was.

[7StringedBeast]

Tick,

You should really watch this documentary called Life 2.0.  It's all about people who are addicted to second life.  It's really an amazing documentary delving into how this game affects people.  People break up marriages to marry people they met through the game who they never met in real life.  People deprive themselves of any real life outside of their computer room.  Others stay at home and their job is to create content for the game and sell it through the game.  It's a fascinating look at this concept.  I really encourage everyone to check out this film if you can.  I saw it at Sundance last year and it was a great doc.

[ReaperKK]

I didn't know second life was still popular. I remember messing around with it back in 05 and it wasn't really that interesting.

[MetalJunkie]

the guy who seemingly has it all

Seemingly.  People can put up a pretty spectacular facade, even around their best friends, while their life is falling down around them on the inside.  As you've noted, there's clearly other issues in this guy's life, that aren't readily apparent in the image he projects to others.

Whenever Richard Cory went down town,
We people on the pavement looked at him:
He was a gentleman from sole to crown,
Clean-favoured and imperially slim.

And he was always quietly arrayed,
And he was always human when he talked;
But still he fluttered pulses when he said,
"Good Morning!" and he glittered when he walked.

And he was rich, yes, richer than a king,
And admirably schooled in every grace:
In fine -- we thought that he was everything
To make us wish that we were in his place.

So on we worked and waited for the light,
And went without the meat and cursed the bread,
And Richard Cory, one calm summer night,
Went home and put a bullet in his head.

[Tick]

I didn't know second life was still popular. I remember messing around with it back in 05 and it wasn't really that interesting.

The guy I know is a musician, so he has gigs to showcase his original music. From what I hear a bunch of regulars show up each week to attend the shows.
Bizarre.