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General => General Discussion => Topic started by: Tick on June 08, 2018, 08:29:59 AM

Title: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Tick on June 08, 2018, 08:29:59 AM
I am deeply disturbed with how many industry heavyweights are committing suicide. I was a big fan of Dolores Oriordan of the Cranberries. Chris Cornell. Many others. Whenever I hear there music I get a heavy feeling. Now Anthony Bordain. I loved that guy.
I'm having a hard time processing this stuff.
Why?
 
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Chino on June 08, 2018, 08:36:09 AM
I am deeply disturbed with how many industry heavyweights are committing suicide. I was a big fan of Dolores Oriordan of the Cranberries. Chris Cornell. Many others. Whenever I hear there music I get a heavy feeling. Now Anthony Bordain. I loved that guy.
I'm having a hard time processing this stuff.
Why?

The 24/7 bombardment of negative news and the cancer that social media has become is bringing out the dark in people.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: El Barto on June 08, 2018, 08:43:42 AM
Why?
 
Because they decided enough was enough. What I can offer up to you is this. We don't know what their life was like. Just because a person has fame and wealth doesn't mean they don't find their life unbearable, and without knowing the extent of their pain we're not really in a position to judge them for ending it. One of the few people in life I considered a hero offed himself, and I was bummed out for about five minutes before deciding that was wrong of me. It was his life and if he'd had enough of it then it's selfish of me to think less of him for choosing not to continue on with it for my benefit. I preferred living in a world where he was still alive, so it saddened me when he checked out, but at the same time I'm happy for him that he left on his own terms at a time of his choosing.

If someone has an incurable disease that will leave them miserable for the rest of their life we don't condemn them for ending it. We should be as understanding of the people who are miserable for other reasons.

I have no idea who this Anthony Bordain guy was, but for that reason I have no reason to fault the guy for his suicide.

And by the way, this isn't directed at you. You haven't judged any of these people. I'm just providing my thoughts on the "why" question and our collective attitudes towards suicide.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: bosk1 on June 08, 2018, 08:45:42 AM
I hear you, Tick.  It's tough, man.  And it is hard to process.  I think the "why" is impossible to answer, and I'm sure you know that and are basically posing the question rhetorically.  I have a great life.  There is a lot that I find joy in.  And yet I, too, have times where I feel pretty low and despair takes hold.  I think most, if not all, of us do.  It's just in how we deal with it.  Some just aren't very well equipped to deal with it, for whatever reason.  And it's sad when we see someone give in to that.  I'm not at all equipped to address the deep psychological reasons behind it.  But a couple of things come to mind.

The first is religious, so I'll just post my thoughts without veering too far off into P/R territory (although if anyone cares to debate it, we can do so in the P/R forum--please keep this part of the forum relatively free of P/R debates, please).  But I think having faith and conviction in the existence of God and his promise of an eternal afterlife is a big factor in helping a lot of people pull out of those feelings of despair.  There is joy and hope in something FAR beyond and more lasting than whatever trials of this fleeting 80-something year life (or thereabouts).  Without that, yeah, I can see it being far harder to pull out of that depression cycle when it feels like all is lost and not seeing a way out.

The second has to do with celebrity.  I'm not saying suicide is a uniquely celebrity thing.  It isn't.  But in the case of celebs, I see a pattern of living a lifestyle that more or less loses tough with the day-to-day humanity of leading a "normal," regular life.  I think that is especially true of those who attain celebrity status at a young enough age that they never really learn what it means to lead a normal life, whether musicians, actors, athletes, or what have you.  They often live in a very artificial world.  And I feel like that robs them of developing some of the coping skills that are a very healthy part of life. 

Anyhow, for what it's worth, those are my thoughts on the subject.  Good topic, Tick.  I feel for you.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: King Postwhore on June 08, 2018, 08:46:47 AM
I also think El Barto when we see somebody successful Like Dolores O'riordan & Anthony Bordain and we don't have the unbalance they have emotionally, that they have we only see their success and think they have it all.  We don't know where there mind is.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: lordxizor on June 08, 2018, 08:47:44 AM
I find suicide to be very disturbing in general, not just among celebrities. I've had a couple people tangentially in my life commit suicide over the last year or so and it shakes me every time even though I didn't know them well. I think a large part of it is how empty our lives have become, especially in the US. Go to work, stare at a screen, go home, get some shit done, stare at more screens, read or watch about how shitty everything is, stay up too late, finally fall asleep after tearing our eyes away from a screen. If you don't have a job that really stimulates you, there not much substance to life anymore, especially with parents parking their kids in front of screens more and more. We're seemingly busier than ever, but most of what we're busy with is pretty shallow. What make the celebrities particularly hard to digest is that they're doing something for their career that you'd assume they were extremely passionate about and gave their life a bigger meaning. But obviously that is not enough for them, which is disheartening. It's especially hard to understand for someone like myself who has never struggled with depression on a long-term medically diagnosed scale, though I have certainly had down times.

Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Chino on June 08, 2018, 08:55:54 AM
The first is religious, so I'll just post my thoughts without veering too far off into P/R territory (although if anyone cares to debate it, we can do so in the P/R forum--please keep this part of the forum relatively free of P/R debates, please).  But I think having faith and conviction in the existence of God and his promise of an eternal afterlife is a big factor in helping a lot of people pull out of those feelings of despair.  There is joy and hope in something FAR beyond and more lasting than whatever trials of this fleeting 80-something year life (or thereabouts).  Without that, yeah, I can see it being far harder to pull out of that depression cycle when it feels like all is lost and not seeing a way out.

I think there is an overwhelming amount of truth to this. When I used to work retail, I worked with some of the most miserable 40+ year olds I have ever known. The only thing keeping their lives from completely falling apart was that they were able to tell themselves "This is part of god's plan. For whatever reason, me suffering here on Earth is fulfilling whatever it is he needs done to accomplish whatever it is he's doing. I happily accept his challenge. In the end, this is just a small amount of sorrow compared to the eternity of bliss that awaits".
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Harmony on June 08, 2018, 09:25:15 AM
Suicide makes me feel bad for family and friends of the deceased, mostly.    I know what that feels like and it is complete hell.

I feel sad for the person who died, but as EB said, who am I to judge?  I do know that help exists for those with suicidal thoughts and that it can make a huge difference to get that help.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Stadler on June 08, 2018, 09:29:09 AM
Throw this out there:  suicides across the population (not just celebrities) is up over 25% since around 2000.   

Bosk, if this does veer into P/R territory, you tell me, but I've said before, and I will say again and again:    I believe the same impetus that is getting these people to so readily take their own lives is similar if not identical to the impetus that "compels" a kid to walk into his school and start raining bullets down on his friends and colleagues.

There has always been violence, and there has always been suicide.   But the numbers are - relatively speaking - skyrocketing.   I would also point out that social media had it's start not too long before all these "explosions", back in the late 1990's.   

Now, I'm not saying I'm right. I'm not saying there is no room for discussion or debate, or contributing theories (I think Bosk is on to something too).   But my goodness, I think this is fertile ground for deep, deep study.   Maybe those Freakonomics guys can shed a little light on this phenomenon.   

For the record, there are others: Kate Spade, Chester Bennington, Ronnie Montrose, Keith Emerson... 
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Phoenix87x on June 08, 2018, 09:38:10 AM
I hear you, Tick.  It's tough, man.  And it is hard to process.  I think the "why" is impossible to answer, and I'm sure you know that and are basically posing the question rhetorically.  I have a great life.  There is a lot that I find joy in.  And yet I, too, have times where I feel pretty low and despair takes hold.


I was just about to post something just like this. Life for me now is great and I'm pretty happy most of the time (significantly happier than I was as a kid and young adult) but despite that I do have low points creep around from time to time, and I'm not totally sure why. Demons from the past bubbling back up from with-in?  Things just going bad in the present (whether conscious or not)? I'm still not totally sure, but its definitely something I experience. I have my sunny days and I have my cloudy days. Luckily, these days I rarely have downpour stormy days as I did for a lot of my earlier life. But I will tell you, I know what its like to be so low, you don't want to go on and its excruciating and terrifying. I swear that if feels like you are dead already.


I find suicide to be very disturbing in general, not just among celebrities. I've had a couple people tangentially in my life commit suicide over the last year or so and it shakes me every time even though I didn't know them well. I think a large part of it is how empty our lives have become, especially in the US. Go to work, stare at a screen, go home, get some shit done, stare at more screens, read or watch about how shitty everything is, stay up too late, finally fall asleep after tearing our eyes away from a screen. If you don't have a job that really stimulates you, there not much substance to life anymore, especially with parents parking their kids in front of screens more and more. We're seemingly busier than ever, but most of what we're busy with is pretty shallow. What make the celebrities particularly hard to digest is that they're doing something for their career that you'd assume they were extremely passionate about and gave their life a bigger meaning. But obviously that is not enough for them, which is disheartening. It's especially hard to understand for someone like myself who has never struggled with depression on a long-term medically diagnosed scale, though I have certainly had down times.



Definitely agree. I feel like many people live an "empty" existence, of routine and complacence. Stagnant and never growing, never learning, never moving forward. I was there as well, and as I sat on the couch alone, I had tons of time to get lost in my own sadness. Now a days I am trying to break free of all of that. Going out and trying new hobbies, meeting new people, trying to work on myself trying to get stronger, healthier and feeding my mind as well as learning new things. And I would say its helped tremendously. I keep busy with things I'm passionate about and I'm much more happier, more of the time. I also try and be honest with myself. If something is going wrong, I go and sit by a lake or at a park or somewhere peaceful and think about would I could change about myself to make a better life. And I find that that helps as well.

And I also think people are WAY too overmedicated. Even though my entire career is dispensing pills. since I know how they work, I really can't recommend xanax (Benzos), ssri's, SNRIs ect or other pills for people right off the bat. I would recommend them as a last resort. They are capable of causing more trouble than their worth honestly.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Tick on June 08, 2018, 09:52:16 AM
I hear you, Tick.  It's tough, man.  And it is hard to process.  I think the "why" is impossible to answer, and I'm sure you know that and are basically posing the question rhetorically.  I have a great life.  There is a lot that I find joy in.  And yet I, too, have times where I feel pretty low and despair takes hold.  I think most, if not all, of us do.  It's just in how we deal with it.  Some just aren't very well equipped to deal with it, for whatever reason.  And it's sad when we see someone give in to that.  I'm not at all equipped to address the deep psychological reasons behind it.  But a couple of things come to mind.

The first is religious, so I'll just post my thoughts without veering too far off into P/R territory (although if anyone cares to debate it, we can do so in the P/R forum--please keep this part of the forum relatively free of P/R debates, please).  But I think having faith and conviction in the existence of God and his promise of an eternal afterlife is a big factor in helping a lot of people pull out of those feelings of despair.  There is joy and hope in something FAR beyond and more lasting than whatever trials of this fleeting 80-something year life (or thereabouts).  Without that, yeah, I can see it being far harder to pull out of that depression cycle when it feels like all is lost and not seeing a way out.

The second has to do with celebrity.  I'm not saying suicide is a uniquely celebrity thing.  It isn't.  But in the case of celebs, I see a pattern of living a lifestyle that more or less loses tough with the day-to-day humanity of leading a "normal," regular life.  I think that is especially true of those who attain celebrity status at a young enough age that they never really learn what it means to lead a normal life, whether musicians, actors, athletes, or what have you.  They often live in a very artificial world.  And I feel like that robs them of developing some of the coping skills that are a very healthy part of life. 

Anyhow, for what it's worth, those are my thoughts on the subject.  Good topic, Tick.  I feel for you.
I contemplated posting this thread in PR because it could easily go there. My wife who is strong in her faith believes its all spiritual. From the suicides, to the mass shootings, to the increasingly worsening natural disasters. When we talk about these things she has some interesting thoughts but as you said, not in this forum.
Me personally, I go to dark places at times. I feel like I'm in darkness at times. So I feel pain when someone else gives up because they couldn't take it anymore. It rattles me greatly.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Chino on June 08, 2018, 09:56:55 AM
Throw this out there:  suicides across the population (not just celebrities) is up over 25% since around 2000.   

Bosk, if this does veer into P/R territory, you tell me, but I've said before, and I will say again and again:    I believe the same impetus that is getting these people to so readily take their own lives is similar if not identical to the impetus that "compels" a kid to walk into his school and start raining bullets down on his friends and colleagues.

There has always been violence, and there has always been suicide.   But the numbers are - relatively speaking - skyrocketing.   I would also point out that social media had it's start not too long before all these "explosions", back in the late 1990's.   

Now, I'm not saying I'm right. I'm not saying there is no room for discussion or debate, or contributing theories (I think Bosk is on to something too).   But my goodness, I think this is fertile ground for deep, deep study.   Maybe those Freakonomics guys can shed a little light on this phenomenon.   

For the record, there are others: Kate Spade, Chester Bennington, Ronnie Montrose, Keith Emerson...

Piggybacking the uptick in suicide rates. It's not just a US thing, and it's impacting people of all ages.

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/teenage-suicides-london-national-rate-higher-deprivation-young-people-figures-a8387501.html

Teenage suicides in London have increased at more than four times the national rate, as growing levels of deprivation and hopelessness grip young people in the capital.

New figures show self-inflicted deaths among Londoners aged between 10 and 19 have more than doubled since 2013, rising by 107 per cent in the three years to 2016 – from 14 to 29 - while across England and Wales the equivalent number increased by 24 per cent.


What really crushes me is when I read about a ten year old killing themselves. When I was ten, my biggest concern in life was whether or not I was going to get to watch Legends of the Hidden Temple after school. I don't even know if I knew what suicide was at that point.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Cable on June 08, 2018, 10:14:56 AM

And I also think people are WAY too overmedicated. Even though my entire career is dispensing pills. since I know how they work, I really can't recommend xanax (Benzos), ssri's, SNRIs ect or other pills for people right off the bat. I would recommend them as a last resort. They are capable of causing more trouble than their worth honestly.


Benzodiazepines are absolutely not recommended for those with symptoms of depression. They actually increase it, as does alcohol. Look no further than Chris Cornell. Injected Ativan I believe, history of depression = boom. This individual claims Xanax is on par with Heroin. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W17qV1WeCHM

Benzodiazepines are usual for an extreme anxiety crisis state, and very briefly. Long term usage carries risk of neurocognitive disorder, and extreme dependency that can at the worst cause death in withdrawal.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Destiny Of Chaos on June 08, 2018, 10:16:26 AM
Overpopulation plays a big role in this, and many of our problems as a species.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: bosk1 on June 08, 2018, 10:18:58 AM
Overpopulation plays a big role in this, and many of our problems as a species.
Agreed.  We need a culling.  I recommend starting with Eagles and Ravens fans, and then re-assessing where we are at after that.  ;)
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: El Barto on June 08, 2018, 10:19:25 AM
Throw this out there:  suicides across the population (not just celebrities) is up over 25% since around 2000.   

Bosk, if this does veer into P/R territory, you tell me, but I've said before, and I will say again and again:    I believe the same impetus that is getting these people to so readily take their own lives is similar if not identical to the impetus that "compels" a kid to walk into his school and start raining bullets down on his friends and colleagues.

There has always been violence, and there has always been suicide.   But the numbers are - relatively speaking - skyrocketing.   I would also point out that social media had it's start not too long before all these "explosions", back in the late 1990's.   

Now, I'm not saying I'm right. I'm not saying there is no room for discussion or debate, or contributing theories (I think Bosk is on to something too).   But my goodness, I think this is fertile ground for deep, deep study.   Maybe those Freakonomics guys can shed a little light on this phenomenon.   

For the record, there are others: Kate Spade, Chester Bennington, Ronnie Montrose, Keith Emerson...

Piggybacking the uptick in suicide rates. It's not just a US thing, and it's impacting people of all ages.

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/teenage-suicides-london-national-rate-higher-deprivation-young-people-figures-a8387501.html

Teenage suicides in London have increased at more than four times the national rate, as growing levels of deprivation and hopelessness grip young people in the capital.

New figures show self-inflicted deaths among Londoners aged between 10 and 19 have more than doubled since 2013, rising by 107 per cent in the three years to 2016 – from 14 to 29 - while across England and Wales the equivalent number increased by 24 per cent.


What really crushes me is when I read about a ten year old killing themselves. When I was ten, my biggest concern in life was whether or not I was going to get to watch Legends of the Hidden Temple after school. I don't even know if I knew what suicide was at that point.
Yeah, despite my pro-suicide attitude, kids offing themselves really bums me out. Somebody who's lived a fair amount of time and is capable of making an informed decision is one thing. The vast majority of kiddos are doing it for reasons that will go away in a relatively short time. They just lack the experience to realize that.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: King Postwhore on June 08, 2018, 10:21:18 AM
Overpopulation plays a big role in this, and many of our problems as a species.
Agreed.  We need a culling.  I recommend starting with Eagles and Ravens fans, and then re-assessing where we are at after that.  ;)

Or just move to the country.  it's much more than overpopulating.  This leads to the gun issue as well.  Mental health is the biggest issue in this country and what is the Dems & Reps doing about it? 

A big fat nothing.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Destiny Of Chaos on June 08, 2018, 10:25:43 AM
Overpopulation plays a big role in this, and many of our problems as a species.
Agreed.  We need a culling.  I recommend starting with Eagles and Ravens fans, and then re-assessing where we are at after that.  ;)

All of the worlds' problems would no longer exist!  ;D
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: El Barto on June 08, 2018, 10:25:52 AM

And I also think people are WAY too overmedicated. Even though my entire career is dispensing pills. since I know how they work, I really can't recommend xanax (Benzos), ssri's, SNRIs ect or other pills for people right off the bat. I would recommend them as a last resort. They are capable of causing more trouble than their worth honestly.


Benzodiazepines are absolutely not recommended for those with symptoms of depression. They actually increase it, as does alcohol. Look no further than Chris Cornell. Injected Ativan I believe, history of depression = boom. This individual claims Xanax is on par with Heroin. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W17qV1WeCHM

Benzodiazepines are usual for an extreme anxiety crisis state, and very briefly. Long term usage carries risk of neurocognitive disorder, and extreme dependency that can at the worst cause death in withdrawal.
I know a few people, myself included, that take Xanax and we all use it the same way. Very sporadically on an as-needed basis. I will say that it's not for anxiety attacks, which I haven't had since I stopped taking a particular BP med (the reason I was prescribed Xanax in the first place). But if you have a blowup at work and your BP goes through the roof it's a godsend. And that godsend is also the reason we take it so sparingly. It's way too valuable to risk your access.

Part of the problem might be how doctors prescribe it. I think mine are prescribed TID as needed, and I suspect a lot of people follow those directions. If a person is taking 3 every day then they should probably be someplace getting proper help. In my case I get a 30 pills and refill after I take 15 or 20, and that's usually about 4 months.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Stadler on June 08, 2018, 10:35:25 AM
Well, you have to wonder; we're supposed to be the most "connected" generation/society of all time, and yet it seems like more and more people are living in or behind a façade, isolated emotionally from those closest to them.   I think in part, that dichotomy is part of the problem.   We have the FEELING of closeness, but few of the benefits and that has to be profoundly confusing and frustrating to those of us that haven't had to overcome those barriers (every day, I become more and more grateful that I went to college at a time where there was no Facechat, or Snapgram or Istabook.  We had to hang out in hallways and TALK to people.)
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Chino on June 08, 2018, 10:43:00 AM
The first is religious, so I'll just post my thoughts without veering too far off into P/R territory (although if anyone cares to debate it, we can do so in the P/R forum--please keep this part of the forum relatively free of P/R debates, please).  But I think having faith and conviction in the existence of God and his promise of an eternal afterlife is a big factor in helping a lot of people pull out of those feelings of despair.  There is joy and hope in something FAR beyond and more lasting than whatever trials of this fleeting 80-something year life (or thereabouts).  Without that, yeah, I can see it being far harder to pull out of that depression cycle when it feels like all is lost and not seeing a way out.

I think there is an overwhelming amount of truth to this. When I used to work retail, I worked with some of the most miserable 40+ year olds I have ever known. The only thing keeping their lives from completely falling apart was that they were able to tell themselves "This is part of god's plan. For whatever reason, me suffering here on Earth is fulfilling whatever it is he needs done to accomplish whatever it is he's doing. I happily accept his challenge. In the end, this is just a small amount of sorrow compared to the eternity of bliss that awaits".

I'm going to take this a step further after thinking about it some more. Being part of an active congregation is also something a lot of people don't experience anymore. If you belong to an active church, even the loneliest of people still have an active social club they can be a member of. They still have people they get to see and talk to on a regular basis. There's a sense of community that being in such a group provides.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: gmillerdrake on June 08, 2018, 11:11:06 AM
Well, you have to wonder; we're supposed to be the most "connected" generation/society of all time, and yet it seems like more and more people are living in or behind a façade, isolated emotionally from those closest to them.   I think in part, that dichotomy is part of the problem.   We have the FEELING of closeness, but few of the benefits and that has to be profoundly confusing and frustrating to those of us that haven't had to overcome those barriers (every day, I become more and more grateful that I went to college at a time where there was no Facechat, or Snapgram or Istabook.  We had to hang out in hallways and TALK to people.)

Not only is it a false closeness but I’d speculate that the majority of the online or social media ‘selves’ that people put out there are not really ‘who’ they are. It’s who they either want to be or want people to think they are and it’s very easy to portray that online. But when you’re left with your thoughts and yourself and you know you’re not fooling yourself....I’d imagine the failure of not actually being that person and the loneliness that accompanies the digital world just starts to eat at you.....along with many other elements
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: cramx3 on June 08, 2018, 11:26:50 AM
My friends are having this same discussion this morning and my doctor friend thinks it's because people are too attached to their phones and social media that they have lost the ability to cope with the real world around them.  I think that's definitely part of it.  For me, I feel like prescription drugs are a problem too.  Everything gets solved with a pill these days.  When they doesn't work, then what?  Not only that, what about the chemicals in your brain from being on these drugs? 
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Stadler on June 08, 2018, 12:15:56 PM
My friends are having this same discussion this morning and my doctor friend thinks it's because people are too attached to their phones and social media that they have lost the ability to cope with the real world around them.  I think that's definitely part of it.  For me, I feel like prescription drugs are a problem too.  Everything gets solved with a pill these days.  When they doesn't work, then what?  Not only that, what about the chemicals in your brain from being on these drugs?

They are starting to see some correlation  between  the use of devices and depression, and if I'm not mistaken, I think I just read that the famous "blue light" that emits from these devices is complicit in increasing the growth of cancerous cells.  https://www.cnn.com/2018/04/27/health/artificial-blue-light-prostate-breast-cancer-study/index.html
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Chino on June 08, 2018, 12:24:06 PM
My friends are having this same discussion this morning and my doctor friend thinks it's because people are too attached to their phones and social media that they have lost the ability to cope with the real world around them.  I think that's definitely part of it.  For me, I feel like prescription drugs are a problem too.  Everything gets solved with a pill these days.  When they doesn't work, then what?  Not only that, what about the chemicals in your brain from being on these drugs?

They are starting to see some correlation  between  the use of devices and depression, and if I'm not mistaken, I think I just read that the famous "blue light" that emits from these devices is complicit in increasing the growth of cancerous cells.  https://www.cnn.com/2018/04/27/health/artificial-blue-light-prostate-breast-cancer-study/index.html

Fuck. I assumed hydroponic farming was safe :/
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Stadler on June 08, 2018, 12:58:20 PM
Just don't farm at night.  It's okay during the day; the problem is that it wreaks havoc with our circadian rhythms, and that in turn  creates a multitude of problems for us.  I've  only seen select pictures of your  setup, but I'd be floored if your rig gives you the same inputs as, say, some kid sitting under his covers playing four hours of Candy Crush before trying to sleep. 
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: TAC on June 08, 2018, 01:05:45 PM
Overpopulation plays a big role in this, and many of our problems as a species.
Agreed.  We need a culling.  I recommend starting with Eagles and Ravens fans, and then re-assessing where we are at after that.  ;)

 :lol

Yankees fans too!
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: El Barto on June 08, 2018, 01:11:57 PM
Just don't farm at night.  It's okay during the day; the problem is that it wreaks havoc with our circadian rhythms, and that in turn  creates a multitude of problems for us.  I've  only seen select pictures of your  setup, but I'd be floored if your rig gives you the same inputs as, say, some kid sitting under his covers playing four hours of Candy Crush before trying to sleep.
Then you should probably be prepared to be six feet under pretty soon.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Stadler on June 08, 2018, 01:42:02 PM
Just don't farm at night.  It's okay during the day; the problem is that it wreaks havoc with our circadian rhythms, and that in turn  creates a multitude of problems for us.  I've  only seen select pictures of your  setup, but I'd be floored if your rig gives you the same inputs as, say, some kid sitting under his covers playing four hours of Candy Crush before trying to sleep.
Then you should probably be prepared to be six feet under pretty soon.

Aren't the lights focused though?  On the plants?  If the lights are shining in Chino's eyes, that's kind of an inefficient system, no?  (Legit questions; I don't know shit about hydroponics).
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: TioJorge on June 08, 2018, 02:26:24 PM
I'll err on the side of Barto once again. No one knows these people (save for a select few that more than likely are drowned out in the absolute torrent of mindless banter). Their lives are veiled and the collective society thinks that because the news and the internet gives us an awkward limited access to their socialite lives, (the collective) we know them somehow. I don't know how much more deluded you can get than thinking that because a news or social website/app posts something about someone, you know them. It's a new thing, relative to the history of humanity, and more people than not have bought into it; and it's still developing, at that. The whole social aspect of the internet is evolving at a mind numbing pace and people can't seem to keep up so they get sucked in.

I can't tell if there's an actual increase in suicides or if the actual reporting on them has...perhaps both. The only thing I know is that once you judge someone on the way they lived their life or chose to end their life (which is in an ultimatum kind of way "choosing to live it"), you make yourself into an ignorant, blindfolded judge that is also an asshole. That's about as lightly as I can put it speaking as someone that has been in the position of having a loaded gun pointed into my mouth and decided against it and all at once lost more than a handful of friends to suicide over the course of the last decade.

It's sad to see him go. That's about all we can say with earnestness. It's either what he wanted or it's what he wanted in that moment. Whatever way you want to put it, it's done, and we'll be on to something else as the collective society in another day or two. Which is sad in its own right.

Ed: For clarification, I guess I'm not really responding to anyone in general here but using this as a thought thread on the subject. Thanks for creating it, Tick.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: cramx3 on June 08, 2018, 02:32:26 PM
I'll err on the side of Barto once again. No one knows these people (save for a select few that more than likely are drowned out in the absolute torrent of mindless banter). Their lives are veiled and the collective society thinks that because the news and the internet gives us an awkward limited access to their socialite lives, (the collective) we know them somehow. I don't know how much more deluded you can get than thinking that because a news or social website/app posts something about someone, you know them. It's a new thing, relative to the history of humanity, and more people than not have bought into it; and it's still developing, at that. The whole social aspect of the internet is evolving at a mind numbing pace and people can't seem to keep up so they get sucked in.

I think this is part of the effect of social media.  If you follow someone, you get a glimpse of their life.  But even then, it's only a glimpse of what they share.  Many people don't share the negatives of their lives (I am totally one of these people, I have little desire to share the shitty part of my life with others, but make no mistake, we all have ups and certainly have downs too), so some people might just believe that what they are seeing is the reality.  It's a big problem to believe that's the case.  It gives people a false idea of what life is like and gives the impression that someone's life is much better than maybe your own in comparison (and then comes the depression).  It's all BS as far as I am concerned and should be absorbed knowing it's not the whole truth, but some people can't grasp that or are too ignorant to understand that. 
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: TioJorge on June 08, 2018, 02:34:11 PM
I'll put this in a separate post since it's totally void of anything relating to my former one but given the thread title, I'll take this time to say that I'm super happy to have been here, being so very disconnectedly connected to the regulars of this distinctly wonderful domain over the growing years. It's such a fantastic place and we've got some members that are legacies in name now and others that stick around no matter what but everyone is appreciated by this little fuck up a screen name.  :heart :millahhhh :heart :millahhhh
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: TioJorge on June 08, 2018, 02:39:52 PM
I'll err on the side of Barto once again. No one knows these people (save for a select few that more than likely are drowned out in the absolute torrent of mindless banter). Their lives are veiled and the collective society thinks that because the news and the internet gives us an awkward limited access to their socialite lives, (the collective) we know them somehow. I don't know how much more deluded you can get than thinking that because a news or social website/app posts something about someone, you know them. It's a new thing, relative to the history of humanity, and more people than not have bought into it; and it's still developing, at that. The whole social aspect of the internet is evolving at a mind numbing pace and people can't seem to keep up so they get sucked in.

I think this is part of the effect of social media.  If you follow someone, you get a glimpse of their life.  But even then, it's only a glimpse of what they share.  Many people don't share the negatives of their lives (I am totally one of these people, I have little desire to share the shitty part of my life with others, but make no mistake, we all have ups and certainly have downs too), so some people might just believe that what they are seeing is the reality.  It's a big problem to believe that's the case.  It gives people a false idea of what life is like and gives the impression that someone's life is much better than maybe your own in comparison (and then comes the depression).  It's all BS as far as I am concerned and should be absorbed knowing it's not the whole truth, but some people can't grasp that or are too ignorant to understand that.

I don't even think it's a question at this point with how we've immortalized and glorified the celebrity culture. The fact that the word "celebrity" holds a totally different mental image than it once did is essentially an answer in itself. There's definitely a problem there and with the recent last half decade of suicides seemingly increasing at an exponential rate, there's going to be a breaking point somewhere along the line sooner than later, I feel. People as a whole can idealize all they want but that's all it is, and the vast majority seem to turn that into a mental dream of a reality that might be for them if they just so happen to either hit the literal jackpot or make it big in other ways...all other aspects of life will seemingly fall into place and fade away.

Life itself won't let that happen and the human psyche certainly won't either. It's becoming so painful clear to those that look past the very thin surface that there's no one answer to happiness in life and it's a sad fact that with so many people on the planet now, there's a lot of people out there that won't find happiness at all. The only thing left to do is to try and understand and appreciate. Try to help out someone in some way or at the very least offer a helping hand.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: cramx3 on June 08, 2018, 02:51:47 PM
Yup, totally with you on that.

I'll put this in a separate post since it's totally void of anything relating to my former one but given the thread title, I'll take this time to say that I'm super happy to have been here, being so very disconnectedly connected to the regulars of this distinctly wonderful domain over the growing years. It's such a fantastic place and we've got some members that are legacies in name now and others that stick around no matter what but everyone is appreciated by this little fuck up a screen name.  :heart :millahhhh :heart :millahhhh

Also, respect to this and DTF.  I feel like this place has a great support system built from people who have made this place a home for myself and others.  There's a sense of community here, and while DTF in itself is almost a form of social media, I think it's very personal and down to earth.  There's nothing about this community thats "fake" and I like and appreciate that.  Not everyone has a place like this to go to and vent or discuss whats going on with their lives.  Being bottled up with problems doesn't help.  Having someone listen and give advice to your issues goes a long way, even for such small things like cones.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: TAC on June 08, 2018, 03:08:11 PM
Yup, totally with you on that.

I'll put this in a separate post since it's totally void of anything relating to my former one but given the thread title, I'll take this time to say that I'm super happy to have been here, being so very disconnectedly connected to the regulars of this distinctly wonderful domain over the growing years. It's such a fantastic place and we've got some members that are legacies in name now and others that stick around no matter what but everyone is appreciated by this little fuck up a screen name.  :heart :millahhhh :heart :millahhhh

Also, respect to this and DTF.  I feel like this place has a great support system built from people who have made this place a home for myself and others.  There's a sense of community here, and while DTF in itself is almost a form of social media, I think it's very personal and down to earth.  There's nothing about this community thats "fake" and I like and appreciate that.  Not everyone has a place like this to go to and vent or discuss whats going on with their lives.  Being bottled up with problems doesn't help.  Having someone listen and give advice to your issues goes a long way, even for such small things like cones.

Amen, Brothers.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: MirrorMask on June 09, 2018, 03:40:14 AM
Some years ago I thought that suicide was the most selfish of acts, and an easy way out. I've come recently to realize that it's impossible to judge what goes on in the minds of people close to you, let alone famous people. There is no definite "scientific law" to predict what affects someone's behaviour, and the thought process that brings them to commit suicide.

Also, there is need for a big social awakening about depression. Depression is not being very sad. Depression is not what you feel after having seen the Red Wedding on Game of Thrones. Depression happens because something in your brain doesn't work properly, it's an ilness and should be treated as such. The brain is an organ of the body like anything else, and something not working within the brain is an illness just and precisely like when your kidney isn't working, or your liver. Depressed people needs support and proper and qualified medical help and medical cures, not a walk in the woods or "trying to not be so sad". Yeah, try not bleeding so much after you've cut yourself.

I don't know how much today's interconnected society has to do with it, and how the social media "fame" of random people or the actual stardom of "famous" people can influence someone.

Most of you here know Kamelot; Roy Khan, their classic singer, left the band some years ago due to a burnout. Recently in an interview he said that he was starting to feel the pressure of performing at such a high level, and he was bothered how night after night countless fans would wait for him for autographs and pictures and that got him anxious, prone to drinking, and sleep deprived. Eventually after Wacken he decided he couldn't handle the pressure of it all and walked away, getting anxious whenever someone even tried to talk about the band.

He got away with that.... I firmly believe that another person in his place, with different walks of life and maybe with different problems, might have considered suicide, rather than "just" leaving the band and retiring to the countryside. Everyone reacts differently to problems of both fame and everyday's life, and you can't predict or try to find signs you should have seen that weren't there.

A better awareness for all the social problems is the key to try to stop it whenever possible. I believe that, while it's not that someone decides to kill themselves or to shoot kids in school just because someone else does it, in the subconcious the idea that these things exist makes these options somehow "real" and avalaible. No one thinks on wedding day "If my wife is gonna cheat on me I'm gonna kill her", but years and years of hearing of husbands killing their wives somehow makes it seem, under stress and duress, as something belonging to the list of things that one could do, while maybe in other situations it was unthinkable. Look also at terorrist attacks - 9/11 shocked me mainly because I couldn't even THINK of hijacking planes to crash them into buildings. If severe security measures would have not been implemented, I believe further attempts would have been made. Now it's easier to use trucks and that's what terrorists do, once someone got the idea everyone followed.

The problem of suicides won't go away stopping to talk and report it, so that less people may even think or remember it's an option avalaible. But as I said a better understanding of the problem, of depression, and encouraging people to reach out to a support system may help to make people remember there's a way out, when they think there is none.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: lonestar on June 09, 2018, 08:05:45 AM
Great post. One thing I'd like to add is that depression and addiction/alcoholism go hand in hand. At some point the substance serves to alleve the symptoms, or makes them tolerable, but with the compounding effects of the usage(and the social,  physical and spiritual toll that the lifestyle takes), it only adds to the hopelessness of the situation and makes eating a bullet or jumping off a building seen a very plausible and acceptable answer. (I do speak from past experience).

Also, alcohol causes and compounds depression. I was neck deep for years, and within months of getting sober a majority of it lifted.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: jingle.boy on June 09, 2018, 08:55:20 AM
Two things.

One, I really wish people would get away from saying "commit" suicide.  That's a huge part of the stigma why it's still a taboo discussion topic.  If it wasn't viewed as a crime or a mortal sin (again, let's stay away from the P/R side of it as Bosk said), perhaps more people would be open to discussing it, and that would give those in real need of a release an outlet for that release - rather than deciding their only release of the pain that they are in (see below) is to take their own life

Second (forgive me if this was mentioned, I didn't read every post yet), but I see it as a way to escape immense and intolerable pain - tantamount to EB's reference of those with an incurable physical illness.  I firmly believe that a significant (all?) number of people who die from suicide view their mental pain and aguish as something that is incurable, and they have made the tragically difficult decision to end their pain.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: gmillerdrake on June 09, 2018, 09:15:29 AM
It's been tough just to read through this conversation and not participate because a large part of how I view suicide is spiritual/religious in nature. Not in a condemning way but in the aspect of for someone to reach that point in their life where ending it is the 'best' option.....that person has zero hope left....zero reason to remain living. That's flat out sad to see, no matter who it is. It's really hard to imagine ending my life is the best option
I have but then again I can't imagine the physical/emotional pain that someone has endured to get them to that point. It must be an intolerable weight and burden if it defeats the innate....natural instinct that is in us all to continue to live and survive at all costs.

I attribute that condition to more than just a sum of horrid physical pain or chemical imbalances in the brain....I do think there is a spiritual aspect to it as well. I'll try to not derail and go full on P/R with this statement but I don't see it as just a simple 'lack' of a spiritual/religious 'lifestyle' but the realization that there is a constant spiritual warfare going on in our lives with an enemy that hates us and anytime he's withered a soul into submission where suicide is the best option it's just another small victory for him yet devastating loss (and spiritual hit) for all those who love and care for the individual who has ended their life.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: KevShmev on June 09, 2018, 09:23:21 AM
The sad thing for some is, it could be someone who fights whatever demons they have really well nearly every day, but have just one really bad day where they don't want to fight them anymore and decide to put an end to them.  You often hear stories about those around someone who committed suicide along the lines of "he/she seemed fine," which maybe they were most of the time, but they had a really bad day where everything in their head just came crashing down at once and they had a bad moment.  I think, in a very real way, social media has made it far worse for people since you always have people who act like their life is so great, making it easy for those who think theirs isn't to think, "Everybody is doing so great, while I am not," which just speeds up the downhill slide.

I used to be of the "you are weak if you commit suicide" line of thinking, but not anymore.  I remember reading the story about Robin Williams and all of the health problems he was having.  I think it is clear that he thought they were never going to get better and just couldn't take the daily pain anymore.  Does that mean he was weak?  I would say no.  The mental and physical pain just beat him down and got the best of him.  We are all only human, after all.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Stadler on June 09, 2018, 09:27:41 AM
Two things.

One, I really wish people would get away from saying "commit" suicide.  That's a huge part of the stigma why it's still a taboo discussion topic.  If it wasn't viewed as a crime or a mortal sin (again, let's stay away from the P/R side of it as Bosk said), perhaps more people would be open to discussing it, and that would give those in real need of a release an outlet for that release - rather than deciding their only release of the pain that they are in (see below) is to take their own life

Second (forgive me if this was mentioned, I didn't read every post yet), but I see it as a way to escape immense and intolerable pain - tantamount to EB's reference of those with an incurable physical illness.  I firmly believe that a significant (all?) number of people who die from suicide view their mental pain and aguish as something that is incurable, and they have made the tragically difficult decision to end their pain.

If I may, I think the two points you made - excellent points, by the way - are related.   Related in the sense that if you don't feel that way it's hard to communicate about it realistically, and if you do feel that way, it's hard to incorporate that someone else might understand what you're going through.

One of my close friend's brother passed in this manner.   His own sister (my friend) and his parents were SHOCKED.  These are the people that ought to know him best, ought to maybe have some sense of understanding, and yet...   this was the guy that was the first one to family reunions.   The first one to offer the toast.  The first one to call on birthdays and what not.  Successful businessman.  Beautiful wife and kids.   

We're at a conundrum (and I'm sorry to beat the dead horse, but the social media and the social agenda don't help here, only make it worse):  we have this conflicting need to be a part of something bigger (which by definition requires you to compromise and soften your edges) and this incessant need to be "unique".   I think some of this emphasis on "you be you" has inadvertently served to reinforce the idea that "no one thinks like I do".   Hell, I don't (thank GOD) suffer from depression, but I spend more time in my therapy than I ought to asking "is it just me, or?"   I think we've done our society - and the people within that society - a disservice by trying to simultaneously sell the idea that we all have an equal part in this, we're all the same, we're all wonderful, but only if we're different and unique and interesting and special.   

I believe the reality is both: we are not all the same, but we are not all unique snowflakes (used in the physical sense of the word, not the political perjorative sense).  Meaning, we don't all respond exactly alike, but there are patterns in the human psyche.  When faced with crisis, some of us  drink/drug.  Some of us deny and subvert.  Some of us get angry/defensive/rebellious.   Some of us internalize and take ourselves out of the game. 

I don't know; I know what I say is sort of iconoclastic, but I think we have to get away from the popular tropes of our society.   I think we have to get away from the stereotypes that we've created around being "unique". I think there's something to be said for rounding the edges, for doing your part to fit in, as opposed to being confused, isolated and alone when you make this bold, possibly misunderstood statement and it falls flat.   
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: MirrorMask on June 09, 2018, 09:31:46 AM
I used to be of the "you are weak if you commit suicide" line of thinking, but not anymore.  I remember reading the story about Robin Williams and all of the health problems he was having.  I think it is clear that he thought they were never going to get better and just couldn't take the daily pain anymore.  Does that mean he was weak?  I would say no.  The mental and physical pain just beat him down and got the best of him.  We are all only human, after all.

Very borderline case, but a famous italian director, Mario Monicelli, commited suicide at 95. He had terminal prostate cancer and he was going blind. He jumped out of the window pf the hospital he was recovered in.

Of course this is an extreme situation, his suicide was not a "weakness" but basically a middle finger to death. One does not live to be almost 100 to die painfully over the course of few months.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Stadler on June 09, 2018, 10:02:59 AM
I used to be of the "you are weak if you commit suicide" line of thinking, but not anymore.  I remember reading the story about Robin Williams and all of the health problems he was having.  I think it is clear that he thought they were never going to get better and just couldn't take the daily pain anymore.  Does that mean he was weak?  I would say no.  The mental and physical pain just beat him down and got the best of him.  We are all only human, after all.

Very borderline case, but a famous italian director, Mario Monicelli, commited suicide at 95. He had terminal prostate cancer and he was going blind. He jumped out of the window pf the hospital he was recovered in.

Of course this is an extreme situation, his suicide was not a "weakness" but basically a middle finger to death. One does not live to be almost 100 to die painfully over the course of few months.

Keith Emerson; Ronnie Montrose. 
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: ReaperKK on June 09, 2018, 12:18:09 PM
There have been a lot of great points made in this thread and I don't really have anything more insightful to add but I believe that you'll never know what's going on in someones head, people fight private battles within themselves all the time and unfortunately some may view that suicide is the only answer. I think the fame and fortune doesn't solve all inner conflicts that you may have. I've read stories of celebrities who have reached all their goals in life yet still feel empty and hollow on the inside.

As far as social media goes I can definitely see it as a contributing factor. If you scrolled through my social media page you would think that everyone is happy, successful, and living a rich and full life.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: TheCountOfNYC on June 09, 2018, 02:58:03 PM
The first is religious, so I'll just post my thoughts without veering too far off into P/R territory (although if anyone cares to debate it, we can do so in the P/R forum--please keep this part of the forum relatively free of P/R debates, please).  But I think having faith and conviction in the existence of God and his promise of an eternal afterlife is a big factor in helping a lot of people pull out of those feelings of despair.  There is joy and hope in something FAR beyond and more lasting than whatever trials of this fleeting 80-something year life (or thereabouts).  Without that, yeah, I can see it being far harder to pull out of that depression cycle when it feels like all is lost and not seeing a way out.

I think there is an overwhelming amount of truth to this. When I used to work retail, I worked with some of the most miserable 40+ year olds I have ever known. The only thing keeping their lives from completely falling apart was that they were able to tell themselves "This is part of god's plan. For whatever reason, me suffering here on Earth is fulfilling whatever it is he needs done to accomplish whatever it is he's doing. I happily accept his challenge. In the end, this is just a small amount of sorrow compared to the eternity of bliss that awaits".

Without going too far into my opinions on this (I stay away from the P/R forum for a reason), I’m gonna disagree with the idea that having religion in your life can help counter depression. I think the two are unrelated. I grew up in a religious family but I’m a non-believer. I’ve suffered from depression and anxiety for my entire life, and I didn’t start coming out of it until I finally came face-to-face with my beliefs (or non-beliefs) and admitted to myself that I don’t think that there’s a higher power who can fix this and that I need to do it myself. For others it may be different and no matter what works for each individual person, I support them, but that’s my point. I don’t think we can say “oh this person decided to end it all because they don’t have God in their life” or visa versa. Depression, anxiety, and suicide are very solitary experiences in the sense that everyone goes through it alone and in their own way. Using a broad analysis will never paint a full picture of the issue. The only way to figure out what’s going on is to look at each individual going through this as...well...an individual. Trying to understand each person’s struggle instead of every person’s struggle is how we can understand what would compel someone to end it all, and in turn, is what will lead to us being able to help those who are too afraid and/or miserable to help themselves.
Title: Re: The Suicide Culture
Post by: Stadler on June 11, 2018, 08:55:14 AM
I'm not at all going to speak for anyone here on matters of religion, but while the devil is in the details, I think there is a way of looking at what Chino and Bosk are saying and what you are saying, such that they are similar.   I'm not sure it's GOD, per se, that is the answer to depression.  But I think there is some benefit to the notion that there is SOMETHING.   Whether it's god, some other spiritual representation of a higher being, or family, or self, the notion that there is hope, there is a plan, there is a path to whatever form the light takes is an important step in all of this.    It may not be the only step - certainly there are medical and, for lack of a better word, pharmacological aspects to all this - but I don't know that psychologically there is a thousand miles difference in Neal Morse's rock solid belief in Jesus Christ and Gene Simmons' rock solid belief in Gene Simmons when it comes to personal outlook.