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General => General Discussion => Topic started by: Chino on May 10, 2016, 05:51:47 AM

Title: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Chino on May 10, 2016, 05:51:47 AM
Just curious if this is something people do. My girlfriend and I sleep like shit because we share a bed. We both squirm a lot when we sleep and are constantly waking each other up and not realizing it. I get maybe 5 hours of sleep a night if I'm lucky when we share a bed. While she was away in Ireland, I got the best 9 nights of sleep that I've gotten in a long time. Anyone?
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: JustJen on May 10, 2016, 06:00:54 AM
Certainly. I've been married almost 23 years now and splitting up the bedtime routine saved it two years ago. He snores. He can't help it. He had a sleep study, a surgery for deviated septum, a CPAP, but it is what it is. He can't help making that sound and I can't help that I can't sleep through it, yet humans require sleep for survival. So there was no choice but to sleep separately. As a result I am so much happier it's not even measurable. He hates it but it is what it is. It's either separate our sleeping routine while married or separate our sleeping routine while divorced, but we cannot sleep in the same room, period.

I've slept better the last two years than I had for the previous 10-15. It's truly more helpful than any anti depressant I"d ever tried while struggling to not murder him every night for 10-15 years.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: ReaperKK on May 10, 2016, 06:04:19 AM
It's something my girlfriend and I are thinking of doing when we move to our new home. I move around a lot when I sleep and she is very light sleeper.

I sometimes sleep in the second bedroom or she does and we always sleep way better.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: JustJen on May 10, 2016, 06:04:59 AM
PS - some people including my husband might say that it seems so wrong to sleep separate that we may as well divorce but I say lots of the best relationships happen between people who don't even live together, let alone sleep in the same bed. Why should it be required just because of a ceremony? It wasn't a "sleep in the same bed" ceremony, it was a "for better or for worse" ceremony. This is the solution for weathering the "worse" part when it comes to sleep.

And seriously, both people are unconscious during this time so who cares where they're located in relation to one another as long as they're in the same home?
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Phoenix87x on May 10, 2016, 06:13:21 AM
Sleeping in the same bed with my girlfriend is a nightmare. We don't live together yet, so I am still enjoying my sleep most of the time, but when we do, I pretty much get no sleep.

She has a queen and I have a queen size, and that shit does not cut it, so the plan is to get a king when we move in together. The second solution that I came up with is two separate blankets. I get hot very easy so she has the big comforter blanket and I have a lighter blanket. This definitely helped a lot, but there's still the space issue, so I am praying that having the space of a king will make it easier. We'll see.

Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Chino on May 10, 2016, 06:22:50 AM
The size of the bed makes no difference with us. We end up gravitating toward one another regardless of the space between. We've tried a king several times and that doesn't seem to make a difference. The temperature fluctuation is a huge contributor to the shitty sleeps. My girlfriend is always freezing, and I'll sleep perfectly if I leave the AC at 60 all night. I constantly wake up drenched in sweat because she runs so hot when she sleeps.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Prog Snob on May 10, 2016, 06:27:40 AM
My ex-wife and I started to sleep apart from each other for obvious reasons. I slept better on the couch because she is an obnoxiously loud snorer, and I'm a light sleeper.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Phoenix87x on May 10, 2016, 06:35:33 AM
The size of the bed makes no difference with us. We end up gravitating toward one another regardless of the space between. We've tried a king several times and that doesn't seem to make a difference. The temperature fluctuation is a huge contributor to the shitty sleeps. My girlfriend is always freezing, and I'll sleep perfectly if I leave the AC at 60 all night. I constantly wake up drenched in sweat because she runs so hot when she sleeps.

Oh man, I totally forgot about the temperature thing. This drives me insane.

Both of us are way different in temperature too, which ruins everything. I have given up with arguing with her, so I just try and adjust to what ever temperature she's comfortable in, but to make matters worse, her temperature changes through out the night.  She's hot, then she's cold, then hot then cold. Fan goes on, fan goes off, window open, window closed.

I would ideally like sleep in the same bed, but the pragmatic answer would probably to just go separate.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: cramx3 on May 10, 2016, 06:42:26 AM
I couldn't sleep with my ex, or more accurately, she could not sleep with me.  I snore and she would hit me when I would sleep and snore.  It got really bad, she would hit me hard throughout the night meaning that now not only could she not sleep, but I could not either.  I would usually move to the couch and then she would get mad that I wasn't sleeping with her.  It became a big problem with our relationship and it slowly turned to me not even attempting to sleep in bed and then we broke up.  I don't think the sleeping in bed was the main reason or anything, but definitely a contributing factor because she wouldn't be happy regardless of where I slept and sleeping for most nights on a couch is not the best for getting good sleep either and that was wearing on me over time.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Chino on May 10, 2016, 06:45:02 AM
My ex-wife and I started to sleep apart from each other for obvious reasons. I slept better on the couch because she is an obnoxiously loud snorer, and I'm a light sleeper.

I'd sleep on a couch every night if I could. I love sleeping on couches. There's a sweet spot where the ass cushions meet the back cushions that I can sink into, and I won't move a muscle until my alarm goes off, or the cat walks on my face.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Stadler on May 10, 2016, 06:45:38 AM
I spent the last two years or so of my marriage on the couch, and it did wonders for my sleep. 

This is not at all uncommon, and as long as the partners have strength in other ways - communication, sex attraction/drive - it is not a hurdle at all, and can be made almost into something fun.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Prog Snob on May 10, 2016, 06:54:50 AM
My ex-wife and I started to sleep apart from each other for obvious reasons. I slept better on the couch because she is an obnoxiously loud snorer, and I'm a light sleeper.

I'd sleep on a couch every night if I could. I love sleeping on couches. There's a sweet spot where the ass cushions meet the back cushions that I can sink into, and I won't move a muscle until my alarm goes off, or the cat walks on my face.

I sleep on the couch in my apartment, even though I do have a bed. I find it rather comfortable.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Stadler on May 10, 2016, 07:06:48 AM
^^ I used to do that when I had my own place.   Sometimes it's easier and more comfortable to just roll over and sleep where you are.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: ReaperKK on May 10, 2016, 07:20:24 AM
PS - some people including my husband might say that it seems so wrong to sleep separate that we may as well divorce but I say lots of the best relationships happen between people who don't even live together, let alone sleep in the same bed. Why should it be required just because of a ceremony? It wasn't a "sleep in the same bed" ceremony, it was a "for better or for worse" ceremony. This is the solution for weathering the "worse" part when it comes to sleep.

And seriously, both people are unconscious during this time so who cares where they're located in relation to one another as long as they're in the same home?

I thought that too for a little bit but then I had more experience living with my gf. We hang out in bed and watch TV and then I'll go to the other room or she will depending on who is going to work first in the morning.

The size of the bed makes no difference with us. We end up gravitating toward one another regardless of the space between. We've tried a king several times and that doesn't seem to make a difference. The temperature fluctuation is a huge contributor to the shitty sleeps. My girlfriend is always freezing, and I'll sleep perfectly if I leave the AC at 60 all night. I constantly wake up drenched in sweat because she runs so hot when she sleeps.

Sounds like my gf :lol

She lets me set the ac to whatever, I keep it at 67. She sleeps in a hoodie, sweat pants, and 3 comforters.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Kotowboy on May 10, 2016, 07:27:38 AM
Why not have seperate bedrooms ?

If one person has insomnia and has to get up and walk around - or is sick and has to get up to be sick a lot - why should the other person not sleep either ?

Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: axeman90210 on May 10, 2016, 07:28:47 AM
My grandparents, who were happily married for many years, had separate beds in the same bedroom. I don't think it's all that uncommon.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: ReaperKK on May 10, 2016, 07:29:03 AM
Well I or she goes into the second bedroom. I just prefer the master bedroom because it's much darker in that room.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: JustJen on May 10, 2016, 07:29:17 AM
Why not have seperate bedrooms ?

If one person has insomnia and has to get up and walk around - or is sick and has to get up to be sick a lot - why should the other person not sleep either ?



I agree. usually the reason is because most people don't have an extra bedroom in their home just sitting there waiting for someone to find a use for it so the only other choice is the couch.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Prog Snob on May 10, 2016, 07:32:11 AM
^^ I used to do that when I had my own place.   Sometimes it's easier and more comfortable to just roll over and sleep where you are.

Exactly. I have the tv in the living room and I'm usually watching it as I fall asleep.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: ReaperKK on May 10, 2016, 07:34:07 AM
I can sleep on the couch but I don't think I can just roll over and go to sleep. I'm a weird guy and I like the process of shutting everything off, lowering the ac, climbing into bed.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: cramx3 on May 10, 2016, 07:42:20 AM
I have no issues with sleeping on the couch occasionally, but after a few months I couldn't take it anymore and bought an air mattress.  I find my basement couch to be very comfortable too, but I like to roll around and spread out which you can't do on a couch.  I do have an amazing king sized bed all for myself now though which I love and every single girl who gets on it loves it too  :biggrin:
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Chino on May 10, 2016, 07:49:26 AM
My grandparents, who were happily married for many years, had separate beds in the same bedroom. I don't think it's all that uncommon.

Seems like heaven

(https://ell.h-cdn.co/assets/cm/15/01/54a74a29c5e4a_-_i-love-lucy-1200x800-elh.jpg)
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: hefdaddy42 on May 10, 2016, 07:51:48 AM
My parents always slept in the same bed when I was a kid.

As soon as my brother and I were out of the house, they started sleeping separately.  Their moods dramatically improved.

Not sure whether it was sleep-motivated or kids gone-motivated.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: JustJen on May 10, 2016, 07:51:54 AM
I also thought of I Love Lucy initially. But wouldn't help a lot of us whose problem is snoring. :(
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: ariich on May 10, 2016, 08:37:14 AM
Not all the time, but quite frequently yeah. It's apparently very common, and generally seen as a good thing for being much better rested.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 10, 2016, 08:41:04 AM
I never sleep in a different room.  Our issues of lack of sleep is the damn cats!  It's all our fault letting them in the room.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: jingle.boy on May 10, 2016, 11:28:02 AM
Mrs.jingle sleeps like shit most of the time, when I'm home, or when I travel.  I can snore sometimes, and she is a light sleeper.  Sadly, we don't have a spare room for either of us to use, so it's either couch or bed - and our couch's ain't all that comfy for sleeping.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: mike099 on May 10, 2016, 11:53:54 AM
My wife and I have slept in separate bedrooms about 5 years.  We have been married for 31 years.  We both snore, but the main reason is she is retired and stays up late and I still work outside the home and go to bed much earlier.  The dog alternates between my bedroom and her bedroom.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Tick on May 10, 2016, 02:41:06 PM
I am 51 and am working on 21 years of marriage. I can't imagine the day when I don't sleep in the same bed as my wife. Our king size bed is huge and I only snore when I drink too much.(so I'm told) Plus my wife sleeps like crap when I'm not in the bed with her. Imagine that...
As the far the hot cold thing goes I often throw an extra blanket on her when shes cold that doesn't touch me.Or if shes hot she flips the blanket off her into the middle of the bed. Never an issue for us.
To each his own but I hope I never see the day I'm in a separate bed than my wife.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 10, 2016, 02:57:48 PM
I hear that from my wife too.  She doesn'tdoesn't sleep well when I'm away.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: El Barto on May 10, 2016, 03:27:14 PM
I am 51 and am working on 21 years of marriage. I can't imagine the day when I don't sleep in the same bed as my wife. Our king size bed is huge and I only snore when I drink too much.(so I'm told) Plus my wife sleeps like crap when I'm not in the bed with her. Imagine that...
As the far the hot cold thing goes I often throw an extra blanket on her when shes cold that doesn't touch me.Or if shes hot she flips the blanket off her into the middle of the bed. Never an issue for us.
To each his own but I hope I never see the day I'm in a separate bed than my wife.
Man, I was fixing to ask if there was anybody in this entire forum that actually shares a bed with their SO. Way to be the outcast, dude.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 10, 2016, 03:28:07 PM
 :lol
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: TAC on May 10, 2016, 03:39:08 PM
I am 51 and am working on 21 years of marriage. I can't imagine the day when I don't sleep in the same bed as my wife. Our king size bed is huge and I only snore when I drink too much.(so I'm told) Plus my wife sleeps like crap when I'm not in the bed with her. Imagine that...
As the far the hot cold thing goes I often throw an extra blanket on her when shes cold that doesn't touch me.Or if shes hot she flips the blanket off her into the middle of the bed. Never an issue for us.
To each his own but I hope I never see the day I'm in a separate bed than my wife.
Man, I was fixing to ask if there was anybody in this entire forum that actually shares a bed with their SO. Way to be the outcast, dude.

I'm with Tick on this one.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Cool Chris on May 10, 2016, 03:46:20 PM
Sleeping in the same bed as my wife took a little getting used to, as she was the first SO I ever lived with. Add in a dog and a cat on the bed, and it gets crowded. And we have the same temperature issues as Chino. But we got used to it pretty quickly. One of us hits the spare bed due to sickness, or if one of us can't sleep and is tossing and turning all night. It is a nice option we have, despite not being utilized often.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: TheCountOfNYC on May 10, 2016, 03:54:04 PM
I share a twin bed with my girlfriend. I love being next to her and if I can have it my way, I will never sleep in a bed without her again.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Kotowboy on May 10, 2016, 04:03:34 PM
I've only ever had the bed to myself.



I can't imagine sharing.
But Kotowboy - nobody will ever want you anyway!!
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 10, 2016, 04:13:16 PM
I've only ever had the bed to myself.



I can't imagine sharing.
But Kotowboy - nobody will ever want you anyway!!

Get out of your comfort zone for once.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Kotowboy on May 10, 2016, 04:25:51 PM
 :rollin

It's that kind of thinking that makes people get married because they think they need to instead of because they want to. . .

Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 10, 2016, 04:30:42 PM
Where the hell do you get married out of that?  Try meeting a girl first silly. :lol
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Cable on May 10, 2016, 04:33:06 PM
I share a twin bed with my girlfriend. I love being next to her and if I can have it my way, I will never sleep in a bed without her again.


A twin bed for two people? If so, how?

My eventual ex-wife and I, like Prog Snob, did rooms and still are here until my place is ready. Taking the other side, I have noticed more negatives in my sleep. I reckon that is due to the situation. I am sure however that she gets better sleep. I was the thrasher and weird noises person, so my guess is her sleep is improved.

With my next relationship, I will heavily consider the options presented here.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Kotowboy on May 10, 2016, 05:39:13 PM
Where the hell do you get married out of that?  Try meeting a girl first silly. :lol

:rollin. Like I'd be acceptable for anyone.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 10, 2016, 05:46:36 PM
That's some deep seated issues my friend.  You are talented,  good looking and emotionally shut off from the world. It's you that's hurting yourself.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Kotowboy on May 10, 2016, 05:50:06 PM
I'm nothing.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 10, 2016, 05:54:50 PM
You are everything.  You just have to believe.   I love seeing your trips to the coast. I'd imagine some girl would love that too.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Kotowboy on May 10, 2016, 06:48:19 PM
 :xbones

Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 10, 2016, 07:17:48 PM
 :tup
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: sneakyblueberry on May 10, 2016, 07:21:02 PM
but when will you sex?
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: JustJen on May 10, 2016, 07:32:20 PM
I'm nothing.

. :hug: you're one of the members i look forward to seeing here. You are valued and appreciated.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 10, 2016, 07:34:25 PM
but when will you sex?

I'm only a manipulator. A broler5if you will.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Prog Snob on May 10, 2016, 07:49:37 PM
but when will you sex?

I'm only a manipulator. A broler5if you will.

I tried looking up that word but the dictionary laughed at me.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 10, 2016, 08:01:38 PM
Broker dammit. Lol.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Prog Snob on May 10, 2016, 08:07:21 PM
Broker dammit. Lol.

 ;)   :-*
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: sneakyblueberry on May 10, 2016, 08:25:36 PM
LOL i was meaning at the OP.

If you sleep in separate beds, WHEN WAS SEX?
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Prog Snob on May 10, 2016, 08:38:22 PM
Who said sex has to be in a bed? You must be quite a bore.  :biggrin:
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: The Trooper on May 10, 2016, 08:43:58 PM
Late to the party here. I was married 15 years to my now ex wife. The last 8 years of marriage for the most part we slept apart. I do not sleep much. 3 hours a day maybe. so was not condusive. lol had nothing to do with the divorce
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: ariich on May 11, 2016, 03:19:55 AM
but when will you sex?

I'm only a manipulator. A broler5if you will.

I tried looking up that word but the dictionary laughed at me.
You need the special dictionary that translates from kinginese.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: TheCountOfNYC on May 11, 2016, 04:11:15 AM
I share a twin bed with my girlfriend. I love being next to her and if I can have it my way, I will never sleep in a bed without her again.

A twin bed for two people? If so, how?

Well we're both 22 years old and super skinny but it still took some getting used to. We've adjusted pretty well but the first few months of it were awful. Right now I still live in my childhood home and my room is too small for anything other than a twin bed. Once I move out, the twin bed will be replaced with a queen.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: JustJen on May 11, 2016, 04:19:21 AM
LOL i was meaning at the OP.

If you sleep in separate beds, WHEN WAS SEX?

Not while sleeping. How boring would that be? I'm tired. Me too. Can't keep my eyes open. Me either. Let me stick it in you. Oka---zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: JustJen on May 11, 2016, 04:21:56 AM
Which makes me ask another question - of all the people having regular sex, how many actually have it at night time after going to bed?

I have never, ever had that be the way things work in my relationship. Bed is for sleep. Not only would it be detrimental to falling asleep but it would make me dirty and sweaty and gross and would mess up the sheets and then I'd have to lay in that all night...? No way. Not on your life.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Phoenix87x on May 11, 2016, 05:02:11 AM
I don't think I've ever had sex right before going to sleep. Sex wakes me right up. So not only is the there the sweaty, grimy feeling, but now I can't even get to sleep.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: JustJen on May 11, 2016, 05:08:31 AM
I don't think I've ever had sex right before going to sleep. Sex wakes me right up. So not only is the there the sweaty, grimy feeling, but now I can't even get to sleep.

Yeah same here. To me, morning is way more conducive to sexual activity. Guys usually wake up ready and we're both gonna have to shower before we go out anyway. *shrug*
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Prog Snob on May 11, 2016, 05:39:15 AM
but when will you sex?

I'm only a manipulator. A broler5if you will.

I tried looking up that word but the dictionary laughed at me.
You need the special dictionary that translates from kinginese.

I lost my copy. I'll have Blob email me another one. Besides, it needs constant updating.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 11, 2016, 06:14:57 AM
You guys are silly, I would be rich by now if I had a dictionary out.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Prog Snob on May 11, 2016, 06:17:47 AM
You guys are silly, I would be rich by now if I had a dictionary out.

I can help you with the editing. I only want a little notoriety, like a hand job back rub.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 11, 2016, 06:18:15 AM
I can multitask.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Prog Snob on May 11, 2016, 06:19:41 AM
So it says on the bathroom wall.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 11, 2016, 06:21:07 AM
And concert halls.


Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Prog Snob on May 11, 2016, 06:22:54 AM
 :metal
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: JustJen on May 11, 2016, 06:24:18 AM
You guys are silly, I would be rich by now if I had a dictionary out.

I can help you with the editing. I only want a little notoriety, like a hand job back rub.

Suddenly I have Blink 182 going through my head.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1fECcM0cS4
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Prog Snob on May 11, 2016, 06:27:36 AM
You guys are silly, I would be rich by now if I had a dictionary out.

I can help you with the editing. I only want a little notoriety, like a hand job back rub.

Suddenly I have Blink 182 going through my head.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W1fECcM0cS4

I've never had them going through my head and I'd like to keep it that way.   :lol
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 11, 2016, 06:32:43 AM
 :lol
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: ReaperKK on May 11, 2016, 07:02:41 AM
Which makes me ask another question - of all the people having regular sex, how many actually have it at night time after going to bed?

Almost never, usually we are to tired from the day.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Chino on May 11, 2016, 07:10:28 AM
Which makes me ask another question - of all the people having regular sex, how many actually have it at night time after going to bed?

I have never, ever had that be the way things work in my relationship. Bed is for sleep. Not only would it be detrimental to falling asleep but it would make me dirty and sweaty and gross and would mess up the sheets and then I'd have to lay in that all night...? No way. Not on your life.

Rarely. We go to bed because one of us is falling asleep. We're not the type of couple who'll climb into bed and lay there awake for an hour or more watching TV or reading. As soon as we lay down, one of us is out within five minutes of hitting the sheets. I hate having sex super late at night. I'm usually tired and uninterested. If anything, we'll have sex randomly at like 4:00am because one of us gets horned up and starts molesting the other.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Cyclopssss on May 11, 2016, 07:13:33 AM
My gf and I have been living together for sixteen years. We've had periods that one us slept so badly we've decided to sleep apart for a week or so, until it got better. It's a bitch but it does happen. 
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: cramx3 on May 11, 2016, 07:41:42 AM
Which makes me ask another question - of all the people having regular sex, how many actually have it at night time after going to bed?

I have never, ever had that be the way things work in my relationship. Bed is for sleep. Not only would it be detrimental to falling asleep but it would make me dirty and sweaty and gross and would mess up the sheets and then I'd have to lay in that all night...? No way. Not on your life.

Rarely. We go to bed because one of us is falling asleep. We're not the type of couple who'll climb into bed and lay there awake for an hour or more watching TV or reading. As soon as we lay down, one of us is out within five minutes of hitting the sheets. I hate having sex super late at night. I'm usually tired and uninterested. If anything, we'll have sex randomly at like 4:00am because one of us gets horned up and starts molesting the other.

I am definitely a "lets go to bed and fuck" kind of guy.  Because once it's over, I am usually ready to pass out anyway.  And then maybe wake up and do it again before getting out of bed :lol
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: YtseBitsySpider on May 11, 2016, 09:56:23 AM
yes...but random 4am ground n pound sessions don't occur for couples sleeping separately.

Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Sir GuitarCozmo on May 11, 2016, 12:31:50 PM
Yeah, I can't imagine not sharing a bed with my wife.  Although, like most everyone else, she's easily cold and I roast like crazy.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: cramx3 on May 11, 2016, 12:48:32 PM
Yeah, I can't imagine not sharing a bed with my wife.  Although, like most everyone else, she's easily cold and I roast like crazy.

Why are women so cold blooded?  My ex was always cold too and I am always hot.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Chino on May 11, 2016, 12:52:10 PM
Yeah, I can't imagine not sharing a bed with my wife.  Although, like most everyone else, she's easily cold and I roast like crazy.

Why are women so cold blooded?  My ex was always cold too and I am always hot.

The thing I don't understand is that my girlfriend says she's cold all the time. She'll have two comforters and a hoodie on and still say she's freezing. I have to leave a good two feet between us because it feels like I'm laying next to a radiator cranked all the way up.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Prog Snob on May 11, 2016, 12:55:29 PM
I'm always cold. It's my southern Italian blood. I much prefer the warmer climates.  :coolio
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 11, 2016, 12:56:49 PM
Yeah, I can't imagine not sharing a bed with my wife.  Although, like most everyone else, she's easily cold and I roast like crazy.

Why are women so cold blooded?  My ex was always cold too and I am always hot.

Do you guys lose blood monthly?  Lol. So there is your answer.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: JustJen on May 11, 2016, 02:03:07 PM
Yeah, I can't imagine not sharing a bed with my wife.  Although, like most everyone else, she's easily cold and I roast like crazy.

Why are women so cold blooded?  My ex was always cold too and I am always hot.

Testosterone. I'm old ( :P ok not THAT old) and so am on bioidentical hormone replacement and my husband has had his share of trial and error with the stuff as well and one thing that is consistent is that any time anyone is on testosterone of any kind that person gets overheated more quickly, OR anytime my estrogen is too low I of course get hot flashes - that's what happens in perimenopause and menopause.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 11, 2016, 02:18:55 PM
My wife is going through "The Change" right now. Cold, Hot, Hot Cold, Cold, Cold, Hot........
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: JustJen on May 11, 2016, 02:46:11 PM
My wife is going through "The Change" right now. Cold, Hot, Hot Cold, Cold, Cold, Hot........

yeah I was 38 when I started having symptoms of peri- but my hormone panels never supported that and so nobody could/would do anything but talk about exercise, stress relief, and nutrition/diet. really frustrating. it wasn't until a month or two ago at 43 that we finally captured evidence of my hormone drops and spikes on blood testing, which allowed my ladyparts doctor to refer me back to the compounding pharmacist, who did an interview with me and assessed my blood work and other stuff and then helped me set up a regimen of BHRT that should help ease the transition since I may well have 5-8 years left of it. I had no clue it took 10 years for perimenopause/menopause to wrap themselves up for most women, with symptoms of PMS increasing during the whole thing and hot flashes and yadda yadda. My doctor is awesome and female and just a tiny bit older than me so shes' going through it too and is super open to helping me out. The stuff you learn too... most people here would be either all googley eyed or all grossed out by what all I've learned lemme tell ya. :lol I hope your mrs has someone helping her out with this because even if she doesn't know she wants it, she does. Trust me. My pharmacist does intake interviews over the phone and mails out the prescriptions, he just needs his patients to have a doctor who is open to receiving his faxed recomendations and who will them write the Rx for it. He's not even in my state though I do live close enough to drive there.. but I bed he'd help your wife out if she/you/her doctor are all on board with it. Just a thought.. I wish someone would have been able to help me get this all sorted a LOT sooner let me tell you!!
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 11, 2016, 03:20:26 PM
She was pre menopausal.  She on a few meds to help. She's really been good about it.  We just have blanket wars.   :lol
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: pogoowner on May 11, 2016, 03:22:39 PM
There's a great episode of Seinfeld where Kramer has to convince his girlfriend (Sarah Silverman) to let him go home and sleep in his own bed after sex. He later finds out that Frank and Estelle Costanza have been sleeping in separate beds for years.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Prog Snob on May 11, 2016, 04:06:25 PM
My wife is going through "The Change" right now. Cold, Hot, Hot Cold, Cold, Cold, Hot........

Light to dark
dark to light
light to dark
dark to light
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 11, 2016, 04:26:09 PM
My wife is going through "The Change" right now. Cold, Hot, Hot Cold, Cold, Cold, Hot........

Light to dark
dark to light
light to dark
dark to light

I wish it was that poetic.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Skeever on May 11, 2016, 07:00:38 PM
Same bed every night. We have a Queen sized bed which is more than big enough to fit both of us comfortably.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Prog Snob on May 11, 2016, 07:34:02 PM
My wife is going through "The Change" right now. Cold, Hot, Hot Cold, Cold, Cold, Hot........

Light to dark
dark to light
light to dark
dark to light

I wish it was that poetic.

I'm sure it's more like Greek tragedy
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: JayOctavarium on May 12, 2016, 12:24:32 AM
I really don't wanna talk about my current situation but.. going by my situation 2 years ago and what not.. Ideally I'd prefer to sleep separate on nights when I have to be up for work the next morning, and together on my off nights.

She stays up till 3 am most nights. I try to be asleep by 11.

*looks at clock*

Oh.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Lynxo on May 12, 2016, 01:55:09 AM
Honestly, I couldn't imagine being in a relationship and not sleep in the same bed as my partner. That's a huge part for me - the intimacy and the cuddling (and more often than not, hot hot sexin' time) just makes me sleep that much better.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: kirksnosehair on May 12, 2016, 12:39:08 PM
Mrs. NoseHair and I don't have separate beds, but our bed is so big we each sleep in our own zip code  :P


Seriously, though, it's a "California King" sized bed, so it's as wide as 2.5 queen beds and it's the most glorious thing ever because the both of us can stretch out in any direction we want and rarely do we disturb each other during the night.  Our dogs sleep with us too and the big bed makes that so much more comfortable. 


When we got married we had a queen-sized bed.  But as we've aged both of us have become lighter and lighter sleepers.  The littlest things can wake either of us up.  Getting the huge bed was part of a strategy to improve sleep and it worked, big time. 
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Chino on May 12, 2016, 12:43:17 PM
I really don't wanna talk about my current situation but.. going by my situation 2 years ago and what not.. Ideally I'd prefer to sleep separate on nights when I have to be up for work the next morning, and together on my off nights.

This is a great point. If it's the weekend, I don't care if I get a shitty sleep. I've got nowhere to be. It's only really an issue because I have to be up at 5:20 every morning. If I don't get to bed before 11 and also happen to have a crappy night of sleep (which only happens if I'm not sleeping alone), work is a living hell the next day. I'm on the verge of falling asleep in meetings quite regularly.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: hefdaddy42 on May 12, 2016, 02:32:18 PM
Mrs. NoseHair and I don't have separate beds, but our bed is so big we each sleep in our own zip code  :P


Seriously, though, it's a "California King" sized bed, so it's as wide as 2.5 queen beds and it's the most glorious thing ever because the both of us can stretch out in any direction we want and rarely do we disturb each other during the night.  Our dogs sleep with us too and the big bed makes that so much more comfortable. 


When we got married we had a queen-sized bed.  But as we've aged both of us have become lighter and lighter sleepers.  The littlest things can wake either of us up.  Getting the huge bed was part of a strategy to improve sleep and it worked, big time.
We have a king sized (but not the California king - dare to dream).

I have been spoiled by it.  Whenever we have to stay at a hotel or somewhere else and have to sleep in a queen, neither of sleeps well because the bed is way too small.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Nick on May 12, 2016, 03:00:04 PM
I can definitely see the benefit of two beds, even though I've never done that myself. Both of us are probably detrimental to each other's sleep, and it doesn't help that she sleeps from ~10-5:30 whereas I sleep from ~1-7:15. So I'm always getting situated while she's already asleep, and she wakes up while I'm still sleeping. Thankfully there have never been any issues with us waking each other up, consciously, but I realize that it might not make for the soundest sleep.

And an aside from earlier, generally, sex just flips a switch for me; if I'm tired it completely wakes me up, but if I'm fully energized it leaves me wanting to sleep.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Tick on May 12, 2016, 04:12:04 PM
I am 51 and am working on 21 years of marriage. I can't imagine the day when I don't sleep in the same bed as my wife. Our king size bed is huge and I only snore when I drink too much.(so I'm told) Plus my wife sleeps like crap when I'm not in the bed with her. Imagine that...
As the far the hot cold thing goes I often throw an extra blanket on her when shes cold that doesn't touch me.Or if shes hot she flips the blanket off her into the middle of the bed. Never an issue for us.
To each his own but I hope I never see the day I'm in a separate bed than my wife.
Man, I was fixing to ask if there was anybody in this entire forum that actually shares a bed with their SO. Way to be the outcast, dude.

I'm with Tick on this one.
Always an outcast....hunted like an animal...hated despised...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OFAUq9cqC9k
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: sneakyblueberry on May 12, 2016, 07:50:17 PM
Honestly, I couldn't imagine being in a relationship and not sleep in the same bed as my partner. That's a huge part for me - the intimacy and the cuddling (and more often than not, hot hot sexin' time) just makes me sleep that much better.

This.  To me it's one of the great pleasures of being in a relationship.  Sleeping next to a warm body <3
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: DragonAttack on May 12, 2016, 09:17:30 PM
Back to the Lucy & 'Ricky' picture:  growing up and watching their show and Dick Van Dyke reruns, for years I thought my parents and all of my aunts and uncles were somewhat poor..........because none of them had two beds.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: Chino on May 13, 2016, 05:48:41 AM
Honestly, I couldn't imagine being in a relationship and not sleep in the same bed as my partner. That's a huge part for me - the intimacy and the cuddling (and more often than not, hot hot sexin' time) just makes me sleep that much better.

This.  To me it's one of the great pleasures of being in a relationship.  Sleeping next to a warm body <3

Warm bodies are nice, but waking up and literally being able to ring out the sweat from your shirt is a different story. I regularly have to change shirts in the middle of the night because our bed gets so hot. Our memory foam might play a role in that as well as I've read they retain a ton of heat. 
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: King Postwhore on May 13, 2016, 06:36:46 AM
First world problem Brian.
Title: Re: Anyone living with a partner and sleeping in separate beds?
Post by: hefdaddy42 on May 13, 2016, 07:40:03 AM
Back to the Lucy & 'Ricky' picture:  growing up and watching their show and Dick Van Dyke reruns, for years I thought my parents and all of my aunts and uncles were somewhat poor..........because none of them had two beds.
lol