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Author Topic: Scenes From A Hat  (Read 70664 times)

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Offline lonestar

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #105 on: July 07, 2011, 02:47:00 PM »
How to gut a cat, and get off at the same time. :tup
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Offline contest_sanity

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #106 on: July 07, 2011, 04:54:43 PM »
ariich in Sexin' You Later.

Sean Connery in The Penis Mightier.

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Offline Jamesman42

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #107 on: July 07, 2011, 05:57:31 PM »
Premise (NSFW):

Man likes to get his junk handled while driving on the highway. Meets a smoking hot 20-year-old chick. She asks if he is into sadism. He says he has never done it but will try with her. 4 hours later. Parking lot. Make-out session in car. Ignition. Boom. Highway. Zipper down. 80 miles per hour. Mouth on **** action. Scissors. Bad driver merging into his lane 3 feet away. She goes to snip it off. This summer


DON'T CUT ME OFF
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Offline contest_sanity

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #108 on: July 07, 2011, 06:00:08 PM »
Quote from: Jamesman on July 07, 2011, 05:57:31 PM
Premise (NSFW):

Man likes to get his junk handled while driving on the highway. Meets a smoking hot 20-year-old chick. She asks if he is into sadism. He says he has never done it but will try with her. 4 hours later. Parking lot. Make-out session in car. Ignition. Boom. Highway. Zipper down. 80 miles per hour. Mouth on **** action. Scissors. Bad driver merging into his lane 3 feet away. She goes to snip it off. This summer


DON'T CUT ME OFF
:rollin :rollin :rollin :rollin
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Offline Xygmund Archer

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #109 on: July 08, 2011, 12:23:17 AM »
Quote from: Jamesman on July 07, 2011, 05:57:31 PM
Premise (NSFW):

Man likes to get his junk handled while driving on the highway. Meets a smoking hot 20-year-old chick. She asks if he is into sadism. He says he has never done it but will try with her. 4 hours later. Parking lot. Make-out session in car. Ignition. Boom. Highway. Zipper down. 80 miles per hour. Mouth on **** action. Scissors. Bad driver merging into his lane 3 feet away. She goes to snip it off. This summer


DON'T CUT ME OFF

who can follow that? :rollin
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Offline El Barto

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #110 on: July 08, 2011, 12:35:49 PM »
Standings
LeeHarveyKennedy - 2
El Barto - 1
MetalJunkie - 1


LHK's first two were winners, but There's a Negro in my Daugter really makes me laugh a lot more than it should.

Honorable mention to All Tied Up, and Vivid Entertainment's Lets Talk First.
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Argument, the presentation of reasonable views, never makes headway against conviction, and conviction takes no part in argument because it knows.
E.F. Benson

Offline LeeHarveyKennedy

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Re: This should be exciting!
« Reply #111 on: July 08, 2011, 01:16:43 PM »
Wooooo!

Next subject: The worst roommate ever. Take that how you will.
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Quote from: GuitarCozmo on March 01, 2010, 07:59:22 PM
HOLY MARY MOTHER OF GOD!!!!!  THIS is why LHK is the President of Awesome.

Quote from: ZBomber on March 15, 2010, 03:39:51 PM
Why is everything you post the best thing ever said?  :lol

Quote from: The Texas Pirate! on February 08, 2011, 04:14:10 PM
LHK is beyond EPIC.
 :hefdaddy

Offline MetalJunkie

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #112 on: July 08, 2011, 01:19:06 PM »
Hi, my name is Nick.
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Listen! Do you smell something?

Offline El Barto

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #113 on: July 08, 2011, 01:36:21 PM »
Sorry squire,  I've gobbed on your carpet.
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Argument, the presentation of reasonable views, never makes headway against conviction, and conviction takes no part in argument because it knows.
E.F. Benson

Offline El Barto

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #114 on: July 08, 2011, 01:42:45 PM »
And this little fellow is Tigger.  He's not as needy as Boots and Fluffy, and he's not as temperamental as Socks or Widget, but thankfully he is de-clawed; unlike Lord Fluffington over there. 
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Argument, the presentation of reasonable views, never makes headway against conviction, and conviction takes no part in argument because it knows.
E.F. Benson

Offline lonestar

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #115 on: July 08, 2011, 02:05:38 PM »
Got a twenty to spare, I promise youlle get it back when I get a job.


Hey, I drank your last beer, thats cool, right?






Wait till you hear my Patsy Cline cassettes.
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Offline contest_sanity

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #116 on: July 08, 2011, 02:15:21 PM »
"Welcome to cell 28. I can pound you either in the face or in the ass. Your choice."
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Offline King Postwhore

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #117 on: July 08, 2011, 03:34:43 PM »
Hey, I hope you don't mind that I grabbed an underwear out of your drawer.  I ran out.
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I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down'.” - Bob Newhart
So wait, we're spelling it wrong and king is spelling it right? What is going on here? :lol -- BlobVanDam
"Oh, I am definitely a jackass!" - TAC

Offline robwebster

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #118 on: July 08, 2011, 03:44:13 PM »
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Offline El Barto

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #119 on: July 08, 2011, 04:05:01 PM »
Hey, I hope you don't mind that I grabbed an underwear out of your drawer.  I ran out. er, uh, needed some inspiration. 
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Argument, the presentation of reasonable views, never makes headway against conviction, and conviction takes no part in argument because it knows.
E.F. Benson

Offline King Postwhore

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #120 on: July 08, 2011, 04:09:34 PM »
 :lol


Your girlfriend called, I told her you were busy porking another girl and you'd call her back.
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I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down'.” - Bob Newhart
So wait, we're spelling it wrong and king is spelling it right? What is going on here? :lol -- BlobVanDam
"Oh, I am definitely a jackass!" - TAC

Offline Jamesman42

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Read between the lines: 2 weeks from tomorrow
« Reply #121 on: July 08, 2011, 05:22:01 PM »
The worst roommate ever: Dishes will be done tomorrow.
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Offline millahh

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #122 on: July 08, 2011, 05:38:18 PM »
Hope you don't mind, I borrowed your diaphragm.
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Quote from: parallax
WHEN WILL YOU ADRESS MY MONKEY ARGUMENT???? NEVER???? THAT\' WHAT I FIGURED.:lol

Offline lonestar

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #123 on: July 08, 2011, 07:39:45 PM »
Mom, can some of the guys come over?
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Offline contest_sanity

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #124 on: July 08, 2011, 09:33:51 PM »
"Hey David, what's the deal with the white robe and hood in the laundry?"

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Offline contest_sanity

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #125 on: July 08, 2011, 09:38:02 PM »
"Hey, who drank all the milk?  Jesus Christ!"

"Yes?  Let's remember that I died for all your sins, ok?  I'll drink the milk if I feel like it, bitch!"
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Offline LeeHarveyKennedy

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Re: I have nothing to say here
« Reply #126 on: July 09, 2011, 01:11:56 PM »
Quote from: millahh on July 08, 2011, 05:38:18 PM
Hope you don't mind, I borrowed your diaphragm.

Ugh. This made me shudder, so thus it's the winner.


Standings
LeeHarveyKennedy - 2
El Barto - 1
MetalJunkie - 1
millahh - 1
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Quote from: GuitarCozmo on March 01, 2010, 07:59:22 PM
HOLY MARY MOTHER OF GOD!!!!!  THIS is why LHK is the President of Awesome.

Quote from: ZBomber on March 15, 2010, 03:39:51 PM
Why is everything you post the best thing ever said?  :lol

Quote from: The Texas Pirate! on February 08, 2011, 04:14:10 PM
LHK is beyond EPIC.
 :hefdaddy

Offline millahh

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #127 on: July 09, 2011, 04:25:23 PM »
Subject:  Worst things you can hear from your parents.
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Quote from: parallax
WHEN WILL YOU ADRESS MY MONKEY ARGUMENT???? NEVER???? THAT\' WHAT I FIGURED.:lol

Offline King Postwhore

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #128 on: July 09, 2011, 04:37:37 PM »
Your mom loves the girth of my penis.
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I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down'.” - Bob Newhart
So wait, we're spelling it wrong and king is spelling it right? What is going on here? :lol -- BlobVanDam
"Oh, I am definitely a jackass!" - TAC

Offline FlyingBIZKIT

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #129 on: July 09, 2011, 04:39:05 PM »
Dad : "Your girlfriend has a great talent son."
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Offline LeeHarveyKennedy

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Re: Ugh.
« Reply #130 on: July 09, 2011, 04:50:56 PM »
"You want me to call you by our son's name tonight? ... Sure, that could be hot."
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Quote from: GuitarCozmo on March 01, 2010, 07:59:22 PM
HOLY MARY MOTHER OF GOD!!!!!  THIS is why LHK is the President of Awesome.

Quote from: ZBomber on March 15, 2010, 03:39:51 PM
Why is everything you post the best thing ever said?  :lol

Quote from: The Texas Pirate! on February 08, 2011, 04:14:10 PM
LHK is beyond EPIC.
 :hefdaddy

Offline El Barto

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #131 on: July 09, 2011, 04:52:26 PM »
While your fathers traveling, you'll be the man of the house.  :eyebrows:
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Argument, the presentation of reasonable views, never makes headway against conviction, and conviction takes no part in argument because it knows.
E.F. Benson

Offline FlyingBIZKIT

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #132 on: July 09, 2011, 04:55:37 PM »
Son, your Mom caught you masturbating, she's proud and would love to do group sessions every Thursday, for 3 hours. Consider getting a club together at school. Girls and boys are welcome. Young, old, fat, skinny, we accept everybody.
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Offline lonestar

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #133 on: July 09, 2011, 05:54:51 PM »
Sorry son, money is tight, so were going to have to send you to an American public school.
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Offline TheGreatPretender

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #134 on: July 09, 2011, 06:00:17 PM »
You're a survivor sun. No matter how many times your mother and I tried to abort you, you always pulled through.
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Offline contest_sanity

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #135 on: July 09, 2011, 06:16:26 PM »
"No son, I can't take away that cup from you.  Next!"
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Offline contest_sanity

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #136 on: July 09, 2011, 06:22:10 PM »
"Guess what?  You and your mother are going to be strippers in my cabaret."
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Offline contest_sanity

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #137 on: July 09, 2011, 06:23:22 PM »
"I... am your Father!"
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Offline MetalJunkie

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #138 on: July 10, 2011, 12:05:56 AM »
"For your 25th birthday we got you a shirt that says 'I survived Coathanger '86.' Happy birthday!"
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Listen! Do you smell something?

Offline lonestar

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Re: Scenes From A Hat
« Reply #139 on: July 10, 2011, 01:09:04 AM »
"Who the fuck are you?"
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