As one of those weird losers (he's not wrong)... I learned a lot during the period after my divorce and before remarrying.
I met this neat girl. Cute face (that's the extent of my physical shallowness), really cool, really smart, into sports, politics, St. Patrick's Day parades (not a literal requirement, but gets the idea of events and traditions), and casual drinking. All in all a pretty good match on paper. I mean, for me, a really good match on paper. Our first date was good, drinks at a local restaurant, and we ended up hanging through the happy hour into the late night crowd, and it was fun. Even did a little kiss at the end.
Zero spark. None. But we kept in touch, she was a blast to text with, and I gave it a couple shots. Mixed it up with breakfast, lunch, late night drinks...
Zero spark. None.
Sometimes it just doesn't happen. I suppose if you want to go through a sort of "Married At First Sight" thing where you force it, you can, but you have to have some mutual commitment between the two. Absent that, sometimes it doesn't happen. I've sort of come to the realization that there's no benefit to getting angry, or forcing the issue. You do a quick autopsy of sorts, try to be as honest with yourself as you can (if you like music and she doesn't, not your fault; if you talked about your ex the entire time, probably your fault) and move on. You don't need every girl to like you, you just need one girl to like you.