Ooh, are we doing wish lists? Let's do a wish list.
• No epics. They've done that. A Change of Seasons was a very significant song, all the moreso because it was unique. Six Degrees of Inner Turbulence doesn't fit the epic mould so much, but it was different, and new, and special in a completely different way. Octavarium was significant because it was the first long track in a long, long while - but now with In the Presence of Enemies and The Count of Tuscany, it's... overdone. It becomes mundane. It's not, "This is the long one, it's lightning in a bottle." It's "This is the long one, it doesn't fit well on mix CDs." If they've got something to say that needs thirty minutes, great, but I think it's gone the other way round, a bit, lately. Good things, when short, are twice as good. I'd love to hear the ten minute cut of In the Presence of Enemies. Heck, I think the ten minute cut of In the Presence of Enemies might be called "In the Presence of Enemies: Pt. 1."
• No concepts. It's almost a cliche. Again, if they've got a brilliant concept that they really want to commit to the annals of rock history - great. But most rock concepts aren't nearly interesting enough that I'd want thirteen separate tracks dedicated to them, and they always have to jump through all these hoops like the obligatory rock ballad where the hero seeks his soul, and there's all these crap expository lyrics like "I went down to Jonah's farm / I smashed apart the fire alarm" which you can't sing without feeling a little stupid because who the hell is Jonah, and it's like - yes! We get it, The Wall was great! As was Operation: Mindcrime, and Scenes from a Memory. But instead of copying the format of those albums, why not use that time to tell us twelve stories?
Don't get me wrong, a concept's good when done well, when the music really whisks you away on a journey, when it's almost more of a soundtrack than an album, when the music is as much a part of the story as the lyrics if not moreso... but that's so rare, and they've already sort of done it once. Most of the time it's just some cool words set to some cool music, with a few recurring motifs to remind you that it's all basically connected. It's usually a gimmick.
• Diversity. Lots of it. ADToE was very cool, but a lot of songs had similar vibes to them. Bridges in the Sky was perfect, and while Outcry and Lost Not Forgotten are pretty good too, I find BitS slightly overshadows them. I like the links, and I like the consistency, but come on. We've warmed up, now let's see what this new band's capable of. Beneath the Surface was good - very new, very original. Let's hear more of that. And a bit more of Jordan Rudess's electronic stuff would be good. Not loads, just a taste. I don't mean they have to exaggerate - make the heavy song ultra-heavy, and the electronic song ultra-electric, just get lots of distinct characters in there. Not just as simple "heavy," "light," "sombre," "rocky," "electronic." How about something a bit baroque, medieval? Or a spot of wild-west? Maybe something that - god forbid, saying this to a prog rock band - grooves? They kind of did this on Systematic Chaos, it's got that wonderful schlocky horror kind of feel. More of that.
And this is a very silly, very particular one, but...
• Harmony and counterpoint. Two vocal lines going at once - Don't Look Past Me, Supermassive Black Hole type thing. Let's get some really cool backing vocals on the go. They do the trade-off thing often enough, and they're such talented songwriters. Jordan Rudess could write Supermassive in his sleep. Well, okay, he probably couldn't, but he's certainly capable.
Also, while I'm being inspired by Muse, might as well enjoy myself...
• Choir and orchestra. Proper choir, not just patches - you can break them out live. I watched the making of Survival, and the making of Unsustainable, goosebumps throughout, and thought, "Why haven't Dream Theater done that?" They have a bit with Octavarium, but it's decoration on there, and it's synthetic on the Six Degrees Overture. Sacrificed Sons is the closest it's come to being essential. Embrace the choir. I'm sure they've got some dramatic pomp in them.
And, yes. I'd like that instrumental, too.
Jesus. Don't ask much, do I? That was shorter in my head. And twice as good. You can revoke my prog card, now! And you can scrap everything I wrote up there while you're at it, cos all I want, really, is to be surprised. If it was a choice between their dream album and my dream album, I'd rather they defy all these requests and write the big, concept album full of epic rock songs they want to write and stun me. I like the band because they're Dream Theater, I listen to them because they make the choices they make - sod the choices I'd make. This is just what I might suggest if they hired me as a producer. And if they disagreed with any of it, I'd tell them to completely disregard my suggestion and do what they want. Not even in a stroppy way, either.