Author Topic: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)  (Read 2116 times)

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Offline Orbert

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #70 on: November 16, 2016, 05:41:08 PM »
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If her husband decides to go as well, that wouldn't be professional!

Can't agree there.  He only joined the band because his wife's the singer.  I wouldn't expect him to stay in if we axe her.  Why would he?  He owes nothing to the band.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #71 on: November 16, 2016, 05:41:21 PM »
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Exactly.  No reason for one to stay if the other goes.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #72 on: November 16, 2016, 05:41:50 PM »
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The other shoe drops.

Three weeks or so ago, John the band leader says that it's time to start working up that third set.  Emails go around, songs are picked, we decide on a next practice date: this Sunday at 5:00.  We've all been working on the new songs.  Karen actually participates in the email discussions, even makes some good suggestions.

Today she sends an email to everyone in the band, saying that she's really sorry, she's been trying to come to terms with this, but she's decided that she just can't continue with the band.  She says she knows she's let us down, she's tried to keep the band balanced with all of her other commitments, but it's just not working, etc.  In a way, it's a relief.  Things were looking better for a while, but I was kinda wondering how long it would last.  Scorpion and frog.

Mike, her husband, sends an email.  He's blown away!  "Respectfully, Karen, WTF?!"  He's pissed.  He's been working on the songs, a couple hours each, and she should've said something sooner.  Not only that, but he's her husband and this is how he finds out she's quitting the band they're both in?

Yeah, we kinda knew that these two didn't always communicate on things, but whoa.  Blindsided by his own wife.  And pissed about it, and blasting her on a Reply All to the whole band.

I wonder if this means he'll rethink his position on staying in the band.  He said he wouldn't stay if we fired her.  That would be understandably awkward, as it means that even if he voted to keep her, he stayed in a band that voted to can his own wife.  But this is different; she quit, obviously he had no idea that it was coming, and he's pissed.  Also, on a selfish level, I'd rather we didn't have to find a new bassist and a new singer at the same time.  We were just going to come off a two-month break; this could kill the band.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #73 on: November 16, 2016, 05:42:05 PM »
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Ha, she just sent another email, all indignant, saying that he's the one that encouraged her to quit.  And some other things.

John sent texts to the rest of us (leaving Mike and Karen out) right after Mike's email, advising us to just keep quiet, let them spat.  Of course!  I've got a front row seat, I don't want to mess up the show.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #75 on: November 16, 2016, 05:42:42 PM »
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I saw this coming, man! I told ya before the situation wouldn't hold itself. I've walked that road. I'm glad you guys got rid of her!

Offline Orbert

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #76 on: November 16, 2016, 05:42:50 PM »
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Well, we didn't actually get rid of her; she quit.  But yeah, either way, we are rid of her.

Offline Orbert

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #77 on: November 16, 2016, 05:43:03 PM »
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Whoa, that's some drama! I've been waiting for the update on this band. It's the backbone of the musician chat thread. :lol

Offline Orbert

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #78 on: November 16, 2016, 05:43:16 PM »
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:lol

Sadly, the emails have stopped.  I think they both said their respective pieces and have calmed down enough to realize that Reply All is not the proper forum for a husband-wife spat.

So this Sunday's practice is cancelled now.  I'm not surprised.  Steve (lead guitar) told me a while back that he was checking out another female singer, and she was pretty good, but he didn't want to jump the gun or have anyone get upset, so he hadn't contacted her or anything.  Shit, now it looks like we just should've pulled the trigger back then.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #79 on: November 16, 2016, 05:43:37 PM »
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:lol

Sadly, the emails have stopped.  I think they both said their respective pieces and have calmed down enough to realize that Reply All is not the proper forum for a husband-wife spat.


You think? :neverusethis:

So she can't reply to emails at regular times, but then after she quits, it's constant. :lol She has some serious communication issues.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #80 on: November 16, 2016, 05:44:02 PM »
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The past couple of weeks, it seemed like she'd actually figured it out.  As I said, she participated in the discussions about which songs to do next, who's singing what, what key, that kind of thing.  She was making an obvious effort to communicate and make it work, basically solving the only real problem we had with her.  Then suddenly "I can't do this anymore, I quit."

I think Mike's reaction was real, I think it caught him completely off guard, and he went ahead and shared his reply with everyone to let us know that he was just as shocked as we were.

Then she had to defend herself of course, saying he was the one who encouraged her to quit.  I honestly can't see that, it doesn't make any sense, but I can imagine it being a twisting of certain conversations.  She's really busy, she's got so many things going on, she can't handle it all, and he says maybe she should consider dropping something.  Too many plates in the air, something's gonna fall and break.  The topic comes up a few more times, the way it does between a married couple, and again the only advice he can offer is to cut back on the number of things she's trying to do at once.  So she quits the band.

If there had been a next email, it would have been from Mike, saying "I said to quit *something*, not quit the band we're in *together*!"  That's my guess.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #81 on: November 16, 2016, 05:44:14 PM »
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Shit.  So Mike is out, too.  He says it has nothing to do with the band itself, as he likes us and likes playing with us, but has everything to do with trying to build back his relationship with his wife.  Apparently they've been having problems lately, have been separated on and off, and this is why he didn't see it coming, and earlier could not commit to being the liason between her and the band.  Communication has been strained of late, and dropping out of the band will help them both.  He's said from the beginning that he's only in it because of Karen, so this isn't really a surprise, just disappointing.  But I didn't know about all the shit that's been going on behind the scenes.  So there ya go.  We need a new singer and a new bass player.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #82 on: November 16, 2016, 05:44:28 PM »
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Well, keep on going... You have a keyboard, just do the bass lines and ask for the drummer to improve on the bass too.
Ask one of the guitar players to sing till you find a new singer.
Maybe, after all this adaptation process, you find out you don´t need anybody else in the band!  :biggrin:

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #83 on: November 16, 2016, 05:44:43 PM »
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One of the guitarists does some lead vocals.  Actually, he's been doing about 2/3 of them up until now, but that was never the plan.  It was supposed to be about 2/3 Karen and 1/3 Steve, but since Karen never picked songs and wouldn't sing songs she didn't like, Steve ended up singing more, but we've got a couple of female singers lined up, so John said to watch our emails for audition times.

As for the bass, I've done keyboard bass before, but never in a "real" rock setting (church band only).

I know your suggestions were half tongue-in-cheek, but we've actually knocked around the different variations already, and really do need to replace each of them.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #84 on: November 16, 2016, 05:45:01 PM »
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Keyboard bass sounds like such a better option, over having a living, breathing bass player :lol I say that as a bass player myself.  You would have a much more versatile sound. 

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #85 on: November 16, 2016, 05:45:19 PM »
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The problem is that we've specifically picked a lot of songs because they have keyboards in them.  And songs with keyboards... tend to actually have keyboards (plural).  Piano and strings, organ and piano, piano and synth, etc.  If it's not a basic guitar-rock song, then at least half the time, I'm going two-handed already, so covering bass as well just isn't an option.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #86 on: November 16, 2016, 05:45:32 PM »
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What about a midi foot controller/keyboard thing? I have one thats one octave and it comes in handy when I need both hands.  Granted you probably couldn't get too tech with it, then again I don't know how good you are with your feet :lol

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #87 on: November 16, 2016, 05:45:46 PM »
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I'm not a organist.  That is, not a real organist, the kind who can run scales with their feet.  Besides that, you have to be sitting down to do that.

Bass pedals and even keyboard bass are no substitute for a real bass player.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #88 on: November 16, 2016, 05:46:00 PM »
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Fuck it Bob. Fly me out there. I'll play bass.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #89 on: November 16, 2016, 05:46:11 PM »
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Thanks for the offer, Jay.  I'm not sure how well it'd go over with the others, telling them there's this guy I know from the Internet, and we need to pay to fly him out for an audition, but I'll keep it in mind.  ;)

I guess John has been in contact with Rob, our original bass player, who dropped out to fight his cancer which had come back.  Actually, he never lost contact with him; he said he talks to him every couple of weeks, and he (Rob) knows our situation and has offered to fill in if we need it.  I asked John how Rob's treatments have been going, if he's up to it, all that.  Turns out Rob hasn't started his treatments yet.  He's been putting it off.  I thought he dropped out of the band because he was going to be dealing with that, and John said that's what he thought, too, but apparently not.  So I guess I don't know what's going on there.  But we weren't talking about getting him back in the band, just that he'd offered to fill in if we need it.  But with no gigs lined up, and no singer, that's not an issue right now.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #90 on: November 16, 2016, 05:46:39 PM »
(oops, double post)
« Last Edit: November 17, 2016, 07:02:02 AM by Orbert »

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #91 on: November 17, 2016, 12:52:50 AM »
Three pages in and we're only at 2014. Wow! :lol
Hey dude slow the fuck down so we can finish together at the same time.  :biggrin:
Squ
scRa are the resultaten of sound nog bring propey

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #92 on: November 17, 2016, 04:30:00 AM »
Is this available in Kindle format?
Political discussion post-election = pointless.
Nothing like getting a lecture on “what is and will happen” from the same people that just went 0 for 100 at bat during the election cycle.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #93 on: November 19, 2016, 01:15:26 PM »
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The Ongoing Trials and Tribulations of Orbert's Band

Previously on The Ongoing Trials and Tribulations of Orbert's Band...

Our lead singer Karen suddenly quit, three days before we were to resume rehearsals and start working up our third set.

Her husband Mike, who is also our bass player, also quits, per some agreement he and Karen had made, but he's pissed.  Basically both of them have too many things going on and need to focus on their marriage.  He hates that she put him in this position, but he still has to put his wife before the band.

Our fearless leader, John, starts searching BandMix.com for female lead singers in our area, our approximate age and background, and interest in "classic rock" or "70's rock".  He keeps the band updated via email.

No results.  John announces that he is expanding the search in terms of age requirement.  The assumption has been that while younger singers will generally have better voices, they will also be less likely to want to work with a bunch of old farts like us.

One hit.  After exchanging emails and setting up a time to talk on the phone, twice, and not calling, John drops her.  She never does get back to him.

John announces that he is expanding the search in terms of geographical area.  John's house is way out in the northwest suburbs, and I drive half an hour each way as it is.  But if someone wants to drive an hour or more, fine.

One more hit.  About our age, same background, great voice, also good looking.  And she likes our set list!  John talked to her for an hour on the phone, and she's psyched.  We set up an audition for this Sunday. 

Bonus trivia: The band she just left had also auditioned Karen way back when, but went with her.

Bonus bonus trivia: Since we don't have a bass player, Mike agrees to help us out by playing with us for the audition.  He says he misses playing with us.  He is therefore helping us audition the singer who'd beaten his wife out for her previous gig, for a gig to replace his wife, in a band he's not even in anymore.

We received an email last night.  She's taken a gig with another band.  They're already out there working, and in some of the nicer venues around here, and their singer just quit.  Can't blame her, but now we're back to the drawing board.

John announces that he's expanding the search to include transvestites.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #94 on: November 19, 2016, 01:15:47 PM »

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #95 on: November 19, 2016, 01:16:05 PM »
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You're going to become a transvestite?

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #97 on: November 19, 2016, 01:16:43 PM »
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If that is what it takes to make it in music in the 'burbs round Chicago. .

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #99 on: November 19, 2016, 01:17:33 PM »
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I swear, you could not make up better drama and general clusterfuck than this.


So, John had announced that he'd expanded the search to include transvestites.  If you knew John, you'd know that this is way out of character for him.  He's a very straight-laced guy, never swears or tells off-color jokes.  This is his frustration and anger showing.

Our drummer JT says "Wasn't that the last singer?"  Does this on a Reply All, and I'm thinking "whoa, dude..."

Mike jumps in a gives JT some shit about checking the list of recipients before hitting Reply All and saying things about someone's wife, mother, daughter, etc.

JT says "Wait, what?  I'm talking about that other chick (the one who never called back)!"  John had forwarded everyone links to her page on BandMix.com and to her personal page so we could check her out, so we'd seen pictures of her.  One of JT's friends said she looked like a guy in a wig (which she kinda does) so that's what JT thought of when John made the transvestite joke.  He explained as much.

Backpedalling?  I honestly don't think so.  JT is a straight-shooter, ex-military, and had previously confided to me that he thought Karen was pretty hot (which she is) so I believe him.  But he's not particularly eloquent, especially in email where expression is limited, so it did come off as a somewhat lame attempt to save face.

Mike seems to buy it, apologizes for jumping to conclusions, etc.

Two days later, Karen sends a Facebook message to "the group", to the band's Facebook page.  Word has gotten back to her, she's upset, disappointed and saddened that people would say things like that about her, for the record, she is and has always been a woman, etc.  But I'm the one who set up the band's Facebook page, and as admin, I'm the only one who can even read the message.  That put me in the position of having to clear the air, explain how it all went down, and try to calm her down.  At this point, I honestly don't care whether or not JT's comment was a bad joke about Karen (which I still don't think it was), I'm gonna say whatever it takes to convince her that it wasn't, and that it was all a misunderstanding.  Why?  Because Karen's my friend, and I might be in a band with JT, but I still care more about Karen than JT saving face.

So I explain it all to her, sprinkled heavily with reassuring things about how JT would never say that (which is true) and that he actually thinks she's hot, and how I really shouldn't share that because it goes against the guy code, but it's true and relevant here.  She writes back.  She buys it.  It all makes sense now, especially how Mike would specifically tell her the part that hurts her the most, and downplay JT's explanation as a lame attempt to save face, because he's like that.  So abusive, so disrespectful of her feelings, and a bunch of other shit that I have no business getting into the middle of.  I consider both of them friends, and I met them together, played with them together, and this is super awkward for me.  Karen goes on about how facing the prospect of being single at our age and at this point in her life is scary, and she's just feeling vulnerable and overreacting to everything, and feels really stupid now.  I say all the right things like how it sucks how this went down, but she's a great person, talented, attractive, and she'll be fine, but yeah it's kinda scary and I'm there for her if she ever needs someone to talk to, etc.  She writes back, I'm a good friend, yay.

John sends another email to the group.  The last chick, the one who took the gig with the other band, called him back.  Yeah, they gig regularly, which was the big draw to her.  They actually work every weekend, and practice twice a week (which is probably why they're so good and work so much, but not everyone has time for that) and that's actually too much for her.  So she called them back and said she changed her mind and now wants to try out with us again.

Desperation sucks.  Yes, this is a good thing, because we still need a singer, so if she's figured out that the other gig was actually too much and she'd just like to get together once or twice a month and rock and roll, then that's cool.  But she didn't actually talk to this other band first?  They didn't tell her that they practice twice a week and have gigs booked every weekend from now until next year?  They thought they had a new singer, and now they don't.  We thought we were auditioning a new singer, then we weren't, but now we are again?


So much drama, so much pain, so much daze and confusion.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #100 on: November 19, 2016, 01:17:49 PM »
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Why is this not a reality show already, Orbert? I'd watch this.  :corn I still hold out hope that one day your band might actually make it to a gig before exploding.

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #101 on: November 19, 2016, 01:18:04 PM »
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That would be cool, wouldn't it?

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #102 on: November 19, 2016, 01:18:17 PM »

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #103 on: November 19, 2016, 01:18:40 PM »
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Orbert, I love reading your posts in this thread :)

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Re: The Saga of Orbert's Band (consolidated)
« Reply #104 on: November 19, 2016, 01:18:51 PM »
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Thanks.  I do try to make them interesting/entertaining, which is pretty easy, given the source material.