Financially irresponsible friend. What would you do?

[TempusVox]

The payday loan thing is an evil trap that never ends. I had a cousin who constantly got herself in financial straits. She was constantly asking me for money. I too was an enabler. It was never enough. She got so far down the payday loan trail that literally her entire checks were paying off previous loans. I finally told her that I would get her totally out of debt, but I wouldn't give her another dime. She had to clean my house for it. I also told her she had to take a money management class. Many communities offer them for free. My aunt was also always financially irresponsible, so my cousin never even learned the basics. She is much better now, and very stable. But your friend was probably never taught how to budget his cash flow. You need to stop enabling him, but at the same time tell him to get some help in figuring it all out. He owes that much to his kid.

[cramx3]

https://youtu.be/PDylgzybWAw

That is John Oliver from Last Week Tonight on payday loans, his bits are funny, but the subject matter is not.  He goes into detail how bad they are and it quickly turns into a bottomless pit for your cash.  Your friend probably isn't easily going to sit with you to discuss his issues because they are that bad, he will lie and BS his story most likely.  I feel bad for your friend, and for you because it seems like you just want to help especially with the baby on the way.

[JustJen]

Have him call Consumer Credit Counseling service or something if you want to offer help. Teach him to fish, quit handing him perfectly cooked fillets.

[kirksnosehair]

This thread reminds me of one of my favorite songs of all time. 
The OJs - "For The Love of Money"



For the love of money
People will steal from their mother
For the love of money
People will rob their own brother
For the love of money
People can't even walk the street
Because they never know
Who in the world they're gonna beat
For that lean, mean, mean green
Almighty dollar, money


For the love of money
People will lie, Lord, they will cheat
For the love of money
People don't care who they hurt or beat
For the love of money
A woman will sell her precious body
For a small piece of paper
It carries a lot of weight
Call it lean, mean, mean green


Almighty dollar


I know money is the root of all evil
Do funny things to some people
Give me a nickel, brother can you spare a dime
Money can drive some people out of their minds

[MetalJunkie]

So after he borrowed money from a co-worker instead of me to pay off his payday loan that paid off his bills, he asked me to borrow 20 until Thursday. I asked him for what, and he said "food."

[black_biff_stadler]

Tell him you were planning on going to the store anyway and he can just go with you. Very good way to call his bluff in case he was just lookin for piss money to avoid boredom on your dime.

[sneakyblueberry]

Wow, this sounds so much like a friend of mine.

Short on his bills, spending money on stupid shit, up to his eyeballs in debt from payday loans.

He would txt me every week asking for money to get him through.  I would oblige until one day it was like, eh, fuck it.  Said no and told him he needed to make better choices.  He was fucked off at me at first but ended up crying and having a heart to heart.

He went and saw some financial advisors and is now in a better place.  And, more importantly, does not ask me for money

So yeah, with the consensus on this one.  If they don't learn that they're responsible for their own finances they... won't learn.

[wolfking]

Don't give him another fucking cent, ever.

[Sir GuitarCozmo]

For Christ's sake, this.

[carl320]

I wouldn't give him another dime; however, I would give him a copy of Dave Ramsey's book (I forget the title).

The Total Money Makeover.

[Dr. DTVT]

In addition to not giving him more money, if he currently owes you money, make sure you collect interest in the form of kicks to the balls.  That should also help him not have another kid until his financial situation improves.