Author Topic: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip  (Read 109939 times)

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Online Stadler

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip
« Reply #3150 on: February 20, 2018, 06:23:41 AM »
Well,

I was getting too close to this 44 year old RED head mother of 2 at work, and I didn't even realize I was doing it until my buddy pulled me aside and smartened me up. Its so amazing how attraction works. Its started just as joking around, then slipped into teasing and then basically was full on flirting. So my buddy was like "yo, tone that shit down. Remember you're at work, not at the club" and i did. I swear to god I don't know what it is about me that attracts cougars with kids... Last time I was 25. Now at 30, I'm not doing it again, and since its at work, I'm DEFINITELY not doing it.

So I'm banging this hot red head at work, and this smart ass 30-year old starts honing in on my territory.  I told that f*** straight away, 'yo, tone that shit down.  You're at work, not the club!", so hopefully he gets the message and stops trying to mow my lawn.   

:) :) :)   (Just kidding boss!)

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip
« Reply #3151 on: March 20, 2018, 01:24:36 PM »
I deleted my profile on OkCupid after it steadily started to turn to shit with all the changes, so I caved and tried Tinder again. Shockingly enough, I've got like 10 matches so far, as opposed to the handful or so last time around - evidently I look sexier with glasses :zydar: ...or my profile simply looks more representative now :lol I haven't heard back from most, but I've had some nice chats with this one girl and I'm going out with her tomorrow, so that'll be my first Tinder date. :coolio

Offline Chino

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip
« Reply #3152 on: March 20, 2018, 01:42:12 PM »
I deleted my profile on OkCupid after it steadily started to turn to shit with all the changes, so I caved and tried Tinder again. Shockingly enough, I've got like 10 matches so far, as opposed to the handful or so last time around - evidently I look sexier with glasses :zydar: ...or my profile simply looks more representative now :lol I haven't heard back from most, but I've had some nice chats with this one girl and I'm going out with her tomorrow, so that'll be my first Tinder date. :coolio

I'm 4.5 years into my Tinder relationship.

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip
« Reply #3153 on: March 20, 2018, 02:09:58 PM »
I deleted my profile on OkCupid after it steadily started to turn to shit with all the changes, so I caved and tried Tinder again. Shockingly enough, I've got like 10 matches so far, as opposed to the handful or so last time around - evidently I look sexier with glasses :zydar: ...or my profile simply looks more representative now :lol I haven't heard back from most, but I've had some nice chats with this one girl and I'm going out with her tomorrow, so that'll be my first Tinder date. :coolio

I'm 4.5 years into my Tinder relationship.
Congrats, happy to hear it worked out for somebody! :tup

Offline Adami

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip
« Reply #3154 on: March 20, 2018, 02:12:13 PM »
I've never used tinder, but a friend of mine married his tinder date last year and they seem VERY happy.
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Re: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip
« Reply #3155 on: March 21, 2018, 08:16:21 AM »
I deleted my profile on OkCupid after it steadily started to turn to shit with all the changes, so I caved and tried Tinder again. Shockingly enough, I've got like 10 matches so far, as opposed to the handful or so last time around - evidently I look sexier with glasses :zydar: ...or my profile simply looks more representative now :lol I haven't heard back from most, but I've had some nice chats with this one girl and I'm going out with her tomorrow, so that'll be my first Tinder date. :coolio

I'm 4.5 years into my Tinder relationship.

My tinder relationship celebrated one year of being "official" two weekends ago.  We are very happy together.

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip
« Reply #3156 on: March 24, 2018, 10:01:46 AM »
I deleted my profile on OkCupid after it steadily started to turn to shit with all the changes, so I caved and tried Tinder again. Shockingly enough, I've got like 10 matches so far, as opposed to the handful or so last time around - evidently I look sexier with glasses :zydar: ...or my profile simply looks more representative now :lol I haven't heard back from most, but I've had some nice chats with this one girl and I'm going out with her tomorrow, so that'll be my first Tinder date. :coolio

I'm 4.5 years into my Tinder relationship.

My last relationship was a 7 month tinder relationship that only ended because it was getting more serious and she wanted kids, and I didn't. If it wasn't for that we'd probably be married. I know two other couples married from Tinder matches, you get what you put into it :lol

Offline Phoenix87x

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip
« Reply #3157 on: March 24, 2018, 11:18:48 AM »
Reaper, I am surprised you don't want kids. Is that just for now or just in general?
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Re: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip
« Reply #3158 on: April 12, 2018, 08:29:15 PM »
In general. Honestly I didn't give it much thought until that relationship I had. We had a serious conversation about our future and I just thought about having kids and seemed to really put me off. We broke up.

I'm now with someone who doesn't want kids too. I don't know what it is. I guess I'm just selfish but I don't really have the time to be a great dad. I enjoy the company of children, when my niece or nephew is in town I have a lot of fun they are around but I'm ultimately happy they leave at the end of the night :lol

Offline Phoenix87x

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip
« Reply #3159 on: April 13, 2018, 04:47:18 AM »
I can definitely respect that.

The desire to be a father was pretty much a driving force for most of my life. Never having a father myself, there was this gaping hole in my heart that I wanted to heal by being the best father that I could be to a child of my own. I swore that my child would never feel the pain that I did. So I met that girl who I "thought" was my soulmate, best friend and ally in this life. We dated, she accepted my proposal. We were set to be married and she said should she couldn't wait to be the mother of my child, and everything felt right in the world.

I broke down my wall for her. Told her things I never told anyone and for the first time ever, made myself 100% vulnerable to another human being. She had my full trust.

And then she cheated on me and broke my heart. That moment and the subsequent dying of that relationship is the worst pain that I have felt over my entire life.


This picture sums up what I was feeling as that relationship ended





My head was in the clouds during the relationship and I thought it would last forever. Alas, this aint no fairy tale world, and not everything always turns out the way you think. And that experience taught me a lot about how real life works.

So now a days, I'm not so fast to rush in to things, and I am going to be more realistic about the person that I am dating. Sure it would have been great to have the child that I always wanted, but me and my ex would have broken up and then the cycle would have continued. So If a person comes along that I feel I can genuinely maintain a healthy relationship with and provide somewhat of a normal homelife to a child, then I will have one. If not, then I'm not going to stress over it.
« Last Edit: April 13, 2018, 04:37:28 PM by Phoenix87x »
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Re: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip
« Reply #3160 on: April 13, 2018, 08:34:28 AM »
I'm sorry to hear that.   I'm 50 now, and married (for the second time) and I'm really starting to rethink my stance on fidelity.   I'm increasingly coming to think that we aren't wired for that.  I don't know how that fits into a healthy relationship - because I am not really a "sharer" in that regard - but certainly, I have a new... not really "appreciation", but at least understanding for people like Hillary Clinton and Melania Trump and Beyoncé (I only went with them because we know them; they may not be the best examples because of the power dynamic - they're all married to powerful men, and two of them to LITERALLY the most powerful man in the world at that time).

I'm not suggesting you should have stayed or not - that's my appreciation; only you can make that call - but I think the dynamic is far more complex than "she cheated, I'm crushed, buh-bye!".   

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip
« Reply #3161 on: April 13, 2018, 09:05:06 AM »
I'm sorry to hear that.   I'm 50 now, and married (for the second time) and I'm really starting to rethink my stance on fidelity.   I'm increasingly coming to think that we aren't wired for that.  I don't know how that fits into a healthy relationship - because I am not really a "sharer" in that regard - but certainly, I have a new... not really "appreciation", but at least understanding for people like Hillary Clinton and Melania Trump and Beyoncé (I only went with them because we know them; they may not be the best examples because of the power dynamic - they're all married to powerful men, and two of them to LITERALLY the most powerful man in the world at that time).

I love my girlfriend to death and intend on spending the rest of my life with her, but I'll admit that at the age of 29, it honestly bums me out that she could be the last person I have sexual encounters with (excluding threesomes if that ever happens). Our sex life is great, but there is a rush of excitement, fun, joy, and emotion when you end up hooking up with someone for the first time.

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip
« Reply #3162 on: April 13, 2018, 09:36:17 AM »
I'm sorry to hear that.   I'm 50 now, and married (for the second time) and I'm really starting to rethink my stance on fidelity.   I'm increasingly coming to think that we aren't wired for that.  I don't know how that fits into a healthy relationship - because I am not really a "sharer" in that regard - but certainly, I have a new... not really "appreciation", but at least understanding for people like Hillary Clinton and Melania Trump and Beyoncé (I only went with them because we know them; they may not be the best examples because of the power dynamic - they're all married to powerful men, and two of them to LITERALLY the most powerful man in the world at that time).

I love my girlfriend to death and intend on spending the rest of my life with her, but I'll admit that at the age of 29, it honestly bums me out that she could be the last person I have sexual encounters with (excluding threesomes if that ever happens). Our sex life is great, but there is a rush of excitement, fun, joy, and emotion when you end up hooking up with someone for the first time.

There is, but even that gets old.  I've always felt the way you do with my x, that it sucked she would be the last one I'd bang.  Then we broke up and I banged many other girls and now kind of realize that the rush and excitement fades either way.  It's better to just be happy with someone you love IMO.  If I never bang anyone else but stay with my current gf and if we are happy, then I think that's fine for me.

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip
« Reply #3163 on: April 13, 2018, 10:44:48 AM »
Those are some interesting perspectives. I've never been in a long term relationship, and a lot of things about it freak me the fuck out! Maybe one of them is the "last sexual partner" thing. And Stads makes a good point, whether it works for you or not, about what is, let's say, redeemable. But on the sexual partner thing... I don't exactly have a long list. Not all, but most, are more hookups, and less connections with people I click with. That being said, I've never had sex with someone I had REAL feelings for, or felt this amazing connection, or was in LOVE. As we all can probably agree on, just about any sex is a good time  :hat, and not something I'm usually gonna balk at. But some of you might also be familiar with being totally into what's happening, and then when all the fun is had, I literally CAN'T WAIT to be somewhere else. Any thought of the other person is gone. It sounds crude, and it kinda is. It feels shallow, and I've been on the side of feeling "used", or like "a piece of meat." So I guess I'm kinda wondering what the other side is like. Perhaps it's one of those "grass is always greener" scenarios.

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip
« Reply #3164 on: April 13, 2018, 01:18:31 PM »
Well, I won't lie; there are times after that I just want to go downstairs and make a sandwich, or put on PlayStation.   It is what it is.  I get the notion of wanting to feel that rush, and I do miss it, but they are all sort of swirling around in the bigger pot of life.    I don't know how else to say it.   As I get older individual things get less and less "stark" or determinative, and that goes for "wanting to go get a sandwich" or wanting "strange partners".   Does that make sense?

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Re: Lonely Hearts Club Thread v. The Strong Grip
« Reply #3165 on: April 21, 2018, 01:21:58 AM »
So I had a very interesting Thursday night to say the least. A lot of alcohol was involved, and it led to me making out with my ex. It honestly felt weird and was a final confirmation that I’m over her. But the really interesting thing was a conversation I had with one of my friends. I mentioned in a previous post that my friend and her boyfriend broke up and that there might be something there. Well her ex was this “friend” that I was talking to on Thursday, and he asked me if I had ever considered dating the aforementioned girl and that he thinks that we would make a great couple. It was a very surreal moment that got me rethinking my opinion on the possibility of a relationship with this girl.

EDIT: I’m starting to get really freaked out. We keep sharing and liking very similar things on social media in regards to what we want in a relationship. Everything keeps pointing to us being compatible and it’s reallt starting to scare me.
« Last Edit: May 15, 2018, 11:36:48 PM by TheCountOfNYC »
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