Author Topic: Your friends other half...  (Read 1811 times)

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Offline Arry

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Your friends other half...
« on: June 30, 2014, 05:26:02 PM »
... Anyone else have a problem with your friends spouse, partner... who ever?. My closest friend. His wife is one of the biggest cunts  I've ever met... How he hasn't faked his own death yet I have no idea.

Offline bout to crash

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #1 on: June 30, 2014, 06:00:44 PM »
 :lol, I love the topics you start. And yes, I have been through this with several friends. One dated a complete douchebag liar for 3-4 years and I mostly held my tongue. Then she ended up marrying a guy who totally holds her back. Meh.
Oh Jackie, always jumping to the most homoerotic possibility.

Offline Arry

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #2 on: June 30, 2014, 06:06:09 PM »
I don't get the being with someone that makes you miserable. Isn't it better to be alone than with someone that's wrong? This dude is the most devoted  Dad, and she treats him like one of her kids... She sucks...

Offline bout to crash

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #3 on: June 30, 2014, 06:35:13 PM »
No, I think lots of people are so afraid of being alone that they'll sacrifice a lot and be with someone who's not that great just to have somebody. Lame but true.
Oh Jackie, always jumping to the most homoerotic possibility.

Offline npiazza91

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #4 on: June 30, 2014, 06:36:39 PM »
I'm nor married, but it suck when your close friends start to get married.  I'm going through that phase right now.  "Can't hang, dude, the wife needs me around".  Ugh...it's like, have we not been friends for 10 years?

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #5 on: June 30, 2014, 07:07:08 PM »
The older i get, the more I don't hold back.
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Offline MoraWintersoul

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #6 on: June 30, 2014, 07:51:08 PM »
I've been in situations where I mildly dislike or disapprove of my friends' SO's behaviour, but I never bring it up unless they're already complaining about them, then I go all out and advise them to rethink their relationship (done this recently). The thing is, if they're not being massively hurt (like, not feelings-hurt, but a heartbreak in the making), or seriously abused (which often comes with manipulative tactics, so people aren't to blame for falling for it and being abused), you kinda have to remember that this is who they settled for.

In the end, maybe it speaks more about your friend than just his wife. Or maybe you're just not in the know enough about the situation and his wife is right to treat him that way, or he treats her badly as well. Or you're assuming that your friend has the same standards as you. But yeah, choice of a partner speaks about us too. When my self esteem was low, up to 2 years ago, I used to like absolutely mediocre dudes and I befriended some awful people. Maybe you could show him some fun and open his eyes about how his home life doesn't have to look like that. And go from there.

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Offline gmillerdrake

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #7 on: June 30, 2014, 09:04:37 PM »
I outright in your face told my wife, her sister, mother and father they were absolutely failing my wife's other sister (daughter) by not intervening and 'not letting' her marry the utter D-Bag loser she is now divorced from. He was, is...and most likely always will be the very definition of a 'loser'...and is now doing a great job as being the poster boy for deadbeat dads everywhere.

I implored them to step in and make her realize that the constant verbal abuse would not get better on e they were married....in fact it graduated to physical abuse, and I tried to convince them that he was indeed still using drugs (having been in that culture before) because I could 'see' it.

I was constantly brushed off and told to keep quiet...that she was 'happy'...but alas, at the expense of her emotionally and financially I was proven right when the masks he wore fell off and his true colors bled through.

They all, including her....now wish they'd have heeded my warming. Dude is just one of those guys that may have birthdays every year but he will never be over the age of 14.
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Offline FlyingBIZKIT

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #8 on: June 30, 2014, 09:50:40 PM »
I outright in your face told my wife, her sister, mother and father they were absolutely failing my wife's other sister (daughter) by not intervening and 'not letting' her marry the utter D-Bag loser she is now divorced from. He was, is...and most likely always will be the very definition of a 'loser'...and is now doing a great job as being the poster boy for deadbeat dads everywhere.

I implored them to step in and make her realize that the constant verbal abuse would not get better on e they were married....in fact it graduated to physical abuse, and I tried to convince them that he was indeed still using drugs (having been in that culture before) because I could 'see' it.

I was constantly brushed off and told to keep quiet...that she was 'happy'...but alas, at the expense of her emotionally and financially I was proven right when the masks he wore fell off and his true colors bled through.

They all, including her....now wish they'd have heeded my warming. Dude is just one of those guys that may have birthdays every year but he will never be over the age of 14.

Nice post, some people just won't listen.

Offline ThatOneGuy2112

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #9 on: June 30, 2014, 10:24:26 PM »
No, I think lots of people are so afraid of being alone that they'll sacrifice a lot and be with someone who's not that great just to have somebody. Lame but true.

The truth in this is stunning...and saddening.

Offline FlyingBIZKIT

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #10 on: June 30, 2014, 10:53:11 PM »
No, I think lots of people are so afraid of being alone that they'll sacrifice a lot and be with someone who's not that great just to have somebody. Lame but true.

The truth in this is stunning...and saddening.

Yes. For sure.

Offline Azyiu

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #11 on: July 01, 2014, 02:27:43 AM »
No, I think lots of people are so afraid of being alone that they'll sacrifice a lot and be with someone who's not that great just to have somebody. Lame but true.

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Offline gmillerdrake

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #12 on: July 01, 2014, 10:38:26 AM »
No, I think lots of people are so afraid of being alone that they'll sacrifice a lot and be with someone who's not that great just to have somebody. Lame but true.

This nails my sister in laws failed marriage. She had very low self esteem and found a guy who for a brief moment in time idolized her and she chose to overlook very glaring warning signs about him.

I know I've been in at least two relationships in my early 20's that were so destructive it was like an episode of COPS every other night.....but I was just so 'scared' of not having someone I was convinced what I was going through was normal. I'm not sure calling the police on a regular basis on a girl who outright beats you is normal....but at the time I thought that was the best I could do.
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Offline Arry

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #13 on: July 01, 2014, 12:08:51 PM »
His wife isn't physically abusive, just has the uncanny knack of squashing any enjoyment she feels he isn't entitled to. Shes enough to turn any man gay.

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #14 on: July 01, 2014, 04:13:45 PM »
... Anyone else have a problem with your friends spouse, partner... who ever?. My closest friend. His wife is one of the biggest cunts  I've ever met... How he hasn't faked his own death yet I have no idea.

His wife isn't physically abusive, just has the uncanny knack of squashing any enjoyment she feels he isn't entitled to. Shes enough to turn any man gay.

These posts are terrific.

Sounds like he needs to man the fuck up and tell that bitch what time it is.
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Offline Arry

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #15 on: July 01, 2014, 05:04:57 PM »
I feel for him. I couldn't exist with a woman like her. Makes me appriciate my other half all the time...

Offline Phoenix87x

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #16 on: July 01, 2014, 05:18:32 PM »
No, I think lots of people are so afraid of being alone that they'll sacrifice a lot and be with someone who's not that great just to have somebody. Lame but true.

Amen to that. 100% truth

Offline The King in Crimson

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #17 on: July 01, 2014, 07:03:57 PM »
I'm nor married, but it suck when your close friends start to get married.  I'm going through that phase right now.  "Can't hang, dude, the wife needs me around".  Ugh...it's like, have we not been friends for 10 years?
Yeah, I'm going through that period of my life right now too. Friends all getting married and having kids and not having time for anything that isn't wife or kid-related. Sometimes I just think "Man, I gotta get in a relationship... just so I have something to do more often." Might not be the most healthy point-of-view but damn if it isn't tempting

Offline gmillerdrake

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #18 on: July 01, 2014, 09:34:10 PM »
having kids and not having time for anything that isn't wife or kid-related.

Once the kids start appearing things certainly change when it comes to how you spend your time. At least for me/us it did. We had our first son 10 months after we were married so there wasn't any real period of time when it was just 'us' hanging with friends. We took off on the family deal and honestly everyone else kind of took a back seat in my mind.

I still get together with buddies and what not....fishing trips and golf etc. etc.....but we all have kiddos and all kind of do our own thing these days, but to this day I could call any one of my 'core' group of buddies and they'd help me out and be there at the drop of a hat if needed.....as would I for them.
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Offline The King in Crimson

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #19 on: July 01, 2014, 09:59:06 PM »
having kids and not having time for anything that isn't wife or kid-related.

Once the kids start appearing things certainly change when it comes to how you spend your time. At least for me/us it did. We had our first son 10 months after we were married so there wasn't any real period of time when it was just 'us' hanging with friends. We took off on the family deal and honestly everyone else kind of took a back seat in my mind.

I still get together with buddies and what not....fishing trips and golf etc. etc.....but we all have kiddos and all kind of do our own thing these days, but to this day I could call any one of my 'core' group of buddies and they'd help me out and be there at the drop of a hat if needed.....as would I for them.
Oh I understand that getting out/away to hang out while kids are in the equation can be incredibly difficult, but that doesn't mean I can't lament the loss of friends that I don't get to see very often anymore. All of my friends have really young kids, so that makes it doubly hard. Honestly, it seems like once one of them had one, the rest started popping them out almost immediately afterwards, as if they were just waiting for one to be the first to take the plunge so the rest could follow suit.  :lol

Offline gmillerdrake

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #20 on: July 01, 2014, 10:05:38 PM »
having kids and not having time for anything that isn't wife or kid-related.

Once the kids start appearing things certainly change when it comes to how you spend your time. At least for me/us it did. We had our first son 10 months after we were married so there wasn't any real period of time when it was just 'us' hanging with friends. We took off on the family deal and honestly everyone else kind of took a back seat in my mind.

I still get together with buddies and what not....fishing trips and golf etc. etc.....but we all have kiddos and all kind of do our own thing these days, but to this day I could call any one of my 'core' group of buddies and they'd help me out and be there at the drop of a hat if needed.....as would I for them.
Oh I understand that getting out/away to hang out while kids are in the equation can be incredibly difficult, but that doesn't mean I can't lament the loss of friends that I don't get to see very often anymore. All of my friends have really young kids, so that makes it doubly hard. Honestly, it seems like once one of them had one, the rest started popping them out almost immediately afterwards, as if they were just waiting for one to be the first to take the plunge so the rest could follow suit.  :lol

Lament away...for sure....I do the same thing. I'm always shocked that when I do get the chance to go to dinner, golf....whatever with one of my friends and we get to talking it turns out it's been 4, 5...6....9? months since we've actually 'seen' each other. Time is certainly picking up pace it seems....especially after we started having kids. I know I'm not the first one to say that or experience it but it sure is happening.

To your point about everyone having kids at once....my group of friends and my wife's....we all started popping them out near the same time. It makes for some fascinating and 'fun' nights together when we get a few of the families together for a dinner night or something....but both our 'groups' of close friends all began the kid portion of life together so to speak.
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Offline Neon

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Re: Your friends other half...
« Reply #21 on: July 01, 2014, 10:17:36 PM »
Whenever I find out one of my friends is pregnant, it always makes me a little bit sad.  Obviously I'm happy for them, but at the same time I know our friendship will never be the same.  And certainly not that we won't still be friends, it's just that I know and understand that they have way more important shit going on in their lives, and they just don't have the time/money/resources to be able to "get away" for a day or an evening as much as they normally would or even as much as they would like to.

I haven't seen my best friend in at least 6 months...and it seems I barely even talk to her these days.  When we do get back together it's like no time has elapsed at all, and I know once her kids are grown we will be back to normal, but damn...I really just miss my friends, and the old times.
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