Yeah I know, this forum is not as active as I think it should be. Sometimes stuff doesn't get the attention that it deserves. I remember seeing on some different forum someplace (I don't remember where, sorry) that if you wanted to post a song for listening or critique, you would have to comment on someone else's song. Thought that made some sense.
Anyway, I hope this will be constructive criticism for you. I listened to the song in full once yesterday and once again right now.
The opening riff is good, but not good enough to anchor the song. Really, it is a 2 bar phrase with only slight variation, yet it comprises much of the song. That isn't to say that it shouldn't be used, but find ways to make it more interesting. Maybe when it comes back, don't have it doubled have it panned on one side while the other guitar(s) do something a bit different. Or maybe palm mute it sometimes with a different, maybe double time drum pattern on the toms. This would make the riff be the same, but sound different yet keep a sense of intensity.
Overall, the rhythm instruments need to be tighter. Everything: drums, bass and guitar. It's noticeable especially in verse section where where they are playing all those upbeats. Those just need to be perfect for maximum effect. Remember, especially for the guitars and the bass, that it is not just the starts of the notes that need to be perfectly in sync, but the endings as well. If you guys aren't ending together it will also not feel as tight as it needs to be. Going into 4:38 really needs to be together and have some good punch to it. That's the big ending of the song and it has to say so from the start.
The vocals are fine, but again they tire after a certain point, until that harsh section comes in about halfway through. Not too sure about the vocal sound/effects going on there. There is no obvious vocal doubling or tripling (I think I may have heard some) and the song could really benefit from it, helping to emphasize the important phrases, create harmony. When doubling vocal parts, ultilize the stereo field. Move the doubled parts away from the center by a margin to give greater width and depth. At parts like 0:54 - it would be more interesting if vocal line, especially the ending word, "Leader" was held out longer. Again at the 4:38 mark. Hold out the ends of phrases throughout the song - makes it more soaring and more interesting and more powerful. Sometimes I feel like the vocals are rushing to complete a phrase and get on to the next phrase. Let the phrase complete. Record the vocal part in phrases according to the lyrics if need be and get them right on.
And again with the bass - it needs to be interesting and it needs to be heard. Sometimes it is and sometimes it isn't. It needs to be consistent. I find bass sounds to be very tough. Enough definition without being bright, and enough low end without being boomy. I really like the rhythm guitar sound. It has plenty of meat to it. That's great. Be sure to low cut EQ the guitars so they don't get in the way of the bass. No real reason for the guitars to be putting out frequencies way low anyway. Make sure it doesn't compromise your tone though. The bass guitar is there to provide that low end anchor for the guitars when following the same line, which it seems to be through much of the song. Don't be afraid of putting a bass fill in there between phrases or having the bass do something interesting. I heard it doing something different a couple of times - good. It makes a big difference.
The drums could be punchier with the style you are going for. In the very first fill, it would be better if the toms were panned more drastically. The snare could be sharper and brought up into the mix (that could be personal preference though - I like my snares sharp and loud). The kick drum is kind of in this no man's land sonically. I hear the punch of the kick, but not a lot of low end meat to it. It is good that you avoided boominess, but but it needs both the high end punch and that low and mid meat. If you are having problems with your kick and bass guitar competing and are sure you have everything EQ-wise pretty good, try side chain compressing the bass guitar. It will lower the bass guitar for the attack of the kick, allowing the punch to come through so the bass does not cover it up. Don't go crazy with it though, this isn't trance music.
There is a lot of good stuff going on around the 3:00 mark, but it doesn't stand on its own necessarily. A combination of interesting riffs that flow together nicely. But it is just dying for some sort of lead part to give it direction and purpose. It doesn't have to be throughout the whole section, but it would certainly liven up that part. Any lead part is actually not utilized until 5:00 into the song, which in my opinion is way to late in this type of song progressive or metal.
The last thing is that it really isn't that progressive, and reminds me much more of a straight-up metal song. The only instrumentation change comes at 4:18, and it doesn't last that long. Throughout the rest of the song it basically just the same in terms of instrumentation - no synths, keys, or different sounding guitars. As far as I can tell it stays in 4/4 the entire song at around 102 or 103(?) bpm with no tempo changes. Structurally, it isn't standard, but it isn't different enough to warrant enough attention.
The guitar playing is great though, I hear a lot of talent there - and it should be used through the song, which is why I was surprised there were so few lead guitar parts.
Overall, there is a lot of good things happening here, a lot of potential. I laid out the rest above. Hopefully I didn't come off as too harsh. You may know a lot of the things I enumerated above already, but I tired to be as helpful as I could.
Good luck with the band!
Topic: Full band demo of our song "Follow The Leader". (Read 1072 times)