This email sounds so legit v. Troll the scammers

[Ultimetalhead]

Hello Bank,

I am e-mailing on behalf of a Miss Yak Yak. She instructed me to call you, but I am deaf due to a very bizzarre gardening accident which took my life as a strapping young lad. Please know that in order to speak with you, I will require you to use a TextPhone. I am the trustee of Miss Yak, and I am to ask the possibility of transferring these funds to my account in the States. Here is the account information:

The account Number: 00331016648
Swift Code Number: AFT877
Deposit Code Number AT78
Amount: 5.6 million USD
Depositor: Dr.Justin Yak
Next of kin: Miss Joycy Justin Yak

Regards,
William Stroker
Stroker Farms, Fields, and Decorative Bush

(BUMPER)

Hello Miss Yak,

I have e-mailed the bank with happenis in my heart knowing that someday we shall be together on my farm. By the grace of Jesus Chris above, I feel everyone will survive this troublesome time. I thank you for asking about my family, but I had to murder my wife fairly recently because she stole the last piece of my chocolate cake. I have to deal with the guilt every day.  I wish I would have just hired a hitman. My 3 children are also well, and they are very much aware that eating my chocolate cake is a bad idea, so I predict that the 5 of us will live in great harmony together.

I must say though your offer to make me my own e-mail account was kind and mildly insulting to my intelligence, I am perfectly happy with the e-mail I have. I can assure you that this e-mail is safe and secure, and nobody else has access to it. I keep very private, personal files on that e-mail account, and if someone had seen what was there, well, let's just say the FBI would be on their way.

I read that you have been in the hospital for some weeks now. It is comforting to me that they offer you the use of computers in hospitals now. I remember when I went there for my gardening accident that caused my deafness, all they did was yell at me. I guarantee if you can complete your studies over here you will be most definitely happy soul. I will fill you in hardcore when you get here. However, before we penetrate that level of our relationship, I would like to inspect the caves. I assume that they may be a little rough, given what you have gone through. I must also ask that we get married very soon, as my lord Jesus frowns upon such sordid acts of sexual congress before we swap saliva in front of the church.

My dear sweet Yak, I pray to Chris that you are still well at this time. Everything will be so much better when you get here. You will fit right in here on this beautiful farm.

Love,
William Stroker
Stroker Farms, Fields, and Decorative Bush

[njdtfan]

priceless!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[ishak540m]

Dateline had a whole series on this:

https://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17713446/ns/dateline_nbc-to_catch_a_con_man/

[Jirpo]

"I pray to Chris" gets me every time

[LieLowTheWantedMan]

 

Dear god I hope the email back with a reaction to the murder.

[MykeHavoc]

Dateline had a whole series on this:

https://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/17713446/ns/dateline_nbc-to_catch_a_con_man/

The guy running away is priceless

[Gadough]

I still haven't gotten a reply. I think it's safe to assume that the scammer finally caught on.

[Ultimetalhead]

Yeah, the murder angle was probably too much.

Anyone else got one?

[Progmetty]

I'm so glad someone is putting these low life scumbags through some torture. One of them ruined my aunt's family.
My aunt's husband was a dumb Egyptian farmer but he had struggled his way through life and formed a small machinery maintenance business then studied mechanical engineering and that business grew into a somewhat of a respectable size import/export factory spare parts business. His family of my aunt, 2 beautiful daughters and a son enjoyed a nice life for a couple of years.
He got internet around 2002 and was more proud of making an e-mail address than buying his fancy car cause he thinks everything computer related is a stunning miracle and the internet is the newest gift God gave man after water and oxygen.
Farmer wit did not catch on one of these scams. He kept sending the motherfuckers money. Sold his business and borrowed money from his neighbors and friends, who are obviously dumber than him since he always told them the truth of why he's borrowing the money and they were convinced it's legit as well.
He started borrowing money from my father and that's when the whole problem got uncovered for the family. Everyone tried to convince him it's a scam but his replies were always stuff like "You don't have faith in me, you think I'm a naive farmer" or "Just wait, you'll see you're all wrong". When I went to talk to him it was clear that he has lost it and his mind was long gone, he sold his car wanted to sell the house they lived in but thankfully my aunt owns it.
The e-mail frauds probably never had such an amazing win and it was party time in Nigeria.
He kept finding more people to borrow money from and his former repute as an honest businessman helped. Finally people started chasing him for their money and he had to go back to his home town to hide there and find more people to borrow money and send it to the internet frauds. The police stormed my aunt's house a few times to look for him and the family were psychologically collapsing.
It got out that he owes people a bit over a million dollars and he had sent the internet frauds a total of at least double that amount including his own money.
My aunt had to get a divorce to stop the police from legally storming her house to look for her husband, my dad started supporting the family and putting the kids through college as my aunt never worked in her life and was always a house wife. His eldest daughter -now 21 years old- just got a job last year and started helping a bit. I've seen them last time I visited Egypt -last year- and they looked so pale and sad.
In Egypt people rarely wanna be associated with a family that has problems with the police. So his daughters can not get married unless they lie to the fiance's family about their father which they would never do. Break-ups because of that were plenty the last couple of years.
So yeah. I like what you guys are doing in this thread

[Ultimetalhead]

Stories like that are the reason I do this. Those people are the worst kind of criminals, and someone needs to slow them down. That should be a good example of people falling for it. It's more common than you can imagine.

[LieLowTheWantedMan]

Wow that's horrible...

[zxlkho]

Thread renamed. We should get after these guys more.

[ClairvoyantCat]

charityatif86@yahoo.com Hello dear new friend, How are you today? It is my great pleasure establishing a contact with you when i saw your Profile am so hoping we can be friends i Miss charity,25years of Age. i am looking to meet a friend with no bad motives,who is affectionate and loving,Age for me does not really matter as long as there is love and understanding contact me (charityatif86@yahoo.com) looking forward to hearing from you in other to send you my photo and details THANKS.
Charity

Think I should give it a go?  I did a search on the address and apparently there's a long and very obvious history of scams from it... it amazes me how obvious scammers are.  If I decided to become one I'd at least do a better job than this 

[zxlkho]

Oh god, yes do it.

[Dr. DTVT]

I got one that a few people can get in on the fun on since it was mass emailed.  Let see how many different ideas people can run with.

Hello

I am Jackson Wang,an attorney at law. A deceased
client of mine,died as the result of a heart-related
condition on March 12th 2007. his heart condition was
due to the death of all the members of his family
in the tsunami disaster on the 26th December 2004 in
Sumatra Indonesia.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2004_Indian_Ocean_earthquake

I contacted you to assist in distributing the money
left behind by my client

I can be reached on (office.of.jackson.wang77@mail.mn)
for more information.

Best regards,
Barr.Jackson Wang
Attorney at Law.

gogogo

[njdtfan]

I actually received an email scam today and have been running with it. I love this stuff. From them.
Hello dear Sir. I am Ms. Akindo in province of South Africa. Help me with a bank transaction that will benefit both our parties.  We humble request that you help me due to my fathers recent passing. The state asks that a trustee sign to obtain $3.2 million dollars. All we ask is that you help me with transaction as trustee as you are a good friend of my father.  and one half of thedollars will be transferred to you. Please advise if this will be working for you. Please send bank account #, name of bank and routing number to complete.
 
My reply: My bank requires that I have a 3 legged goat to complete the transaction. I will be more than happy to help you in this desperate time of need.


Them: We do not have access to a 3 legged goat but want to hopefully complete the transaction for the benefit of both parties.

Me: I told them that in order to complete the transaction, my religion (Dudesim ) from the movie the Big Lebowski, requires that I have an oriental rug, preferably red sent to me. I also told them I am blind from an accident I had many years ago when a bull charged at me and his horns took out my eyeballs.

Their reply," we are so understanding of your sitauation and your unfortunate condition. But we want the transaction to do in a timely manner. Please advise bank account number and monies will be sent promptly.

 Me: Bank account Number: 8675309. Trustee on my behalf- Stevie Wonder. and I must request since you cannot supply the goat that my bank requires a naked picture of Pee Wee Herman to complete the transaction.

Them: we no not what a pee wee herman is. we wish not that hold up transaction. thank you for the bank number but also need name of bank.

[njdtfan]

My reply: The name of my bank is Van Halen Trust. Reference number is Ou812. If sending, prior to transfer, please call and ask for a Mr. David Lee Roth. He will be able to help in completing the transaction. the phone number is 800 328-6333 (1 800 eat meee)

Them: Mr L., we are pleased and so happy that you want to do transaction. It is unfortunate that our father passed and that a close frend and trustee as you is want to help in transaction. I will contact Mr. Roth in the next 24 hours.

My reply: If Mr. Roth is not available or on an extended vaction in the Andes mountains. Ask for a Mr. Hagar. he is a replacement for Mr. Roth and, although he cant drive 55, he will be more than happy to expedite this transaction. Although I am blind due to the bull accident, I have to trust Mr. Roth and Hagar that the monies you are sending will be the proper amount as I cannot see the actual figures. May I also say that I wish you the kindest of thank you's for me being priveledged to do this transaction.
 Them; We thank you for your interest in our help.

 Me: If one day we are lucky to meet, I would kindly take your youngest daughter on a picnic in a deeply wooded forest for some frolicking. She may have to use wagon to bring me up the hill to the forest since I also have no legs as the were eaten by a badger while I was hunting liverwusrt in the hills of Wisconsin.

[bosk1]

[zxlkho]

[chknptpie]

Dear Associate,

How are you doing my friend, great I guess…? Now I know this mail will definitely come to you as a huge surprise, but please kindly take your time to go through it carefully as the decision you make will probably go a long way to determine my future and continued existence. First, let me introduce myself. I am Capt. Michael Scholl, assigned to 2nd Battalion, 3rd Marine Regiment, 3rd Marine Division, 3rd Marine Expeditionary Force, western Anbar Province in Iraq. I am desperately in need of assistance and I have summoned up courage to contact you. I am presently in Iraq and I found your contact particulars in an address journal. I am seeking your assistance to evacuate the sum of $10,570,000 (Ten million Five Hundred and Seventy Thousand USD) to the States or any safe country; as far as I can be assured that it will be safe in your care until I complete my service here. This is no stolen money and there are no dangers involved. 

SOURCE OF MONEY: Some money in various currencies was discovered and concealed in barrels with piles of weapons and ammunition at a location near one of Saddam Hussein's old Presidential Palaces during a rescue operation and it was agreed by all party present that the money be shared amongst us. This might appear as an illegal thing to do but I tell you what? No compensation can make up for the risks we have taken with our lives in this hellhole. The above figure was given to me as my share and to conceal this kind of money became a problem for me, so with the help of a German contact working with the UN here (his office enjoys some immunity) I was able to get the package out to a safe location entirely out of trouble spot. He does not know the real contents of the package as he believes that it belongs to an American who died in an air raid, before giving up trusted me to hand over the package to his close relative. I have now found a secured way of getting the package out!
Of Iraq for you to pick up.

I do not know for how long I will remain here, as I have been lucky to survive two suicide bomb attacks by Pure Divine intervention. This and other reasons put into consideration have prompted me to reach out for help. If it might be of interest to you then Endeavor to contact me and we would work out the necessary formalities but I pray that you are discreet about this mutually benefiting relationship.

For more details please contact me via my private box: capt.michaelscholl@ibibo.com

Respectfully,
Capt. Michael Scholl.
United States Marine Corps. IRAQ.

[lonestar]

 Me: Bank account Number: 8675309.

I cannot tell you how many notches up my coolness scale you ascended with this one simple sentence.

[njdtfan]

This just gets better with each email:

Them: me are so sorry for your legs and hope best for you. We dont understand daughter as I not have one. I hope you the best to further this transaction.

Me: I thank you for the kind wishes regarding me having no legs and eyes. Despite those small inconviences, I am lucky and priveldged to help you with this transaction. But I digress and must ask. Since you do not have a daughter. I would be more than willing to take any farm animal you have to the forest, as long as they can wheel me up the hill. Maybe a donkey could pull me up to the forest. Please advise after talking with Mr. Roth or Hagar so we can complete this transaction in a timely manner as I wish to help you as much as I can.

May I also ask one thing as well if I can, I dont want to Break All Illusions regarding our transaction, and dont want to Outcry about me having Lost but Not Forgotten my eyes and legs, it only hurts Beneath the Surface and even with the loss of both they are just Bridges in the Sky anyway. Even with those 2 losses I am Far From Heaven and Beneath the Surface I am doing well. This Is The Life my dear friend. So Build It Up and Break it Down anyway you like. I am here to help you in any way possible.

[njdtfan]

 Me: Bank account Number: 8675309.

I cannot tell you how many notches up my coolness scale you ascended with this one simple sentence.

LOL. I am having too much fun with this. and Thanks Lonestar!

[Gadough]

Hey guys my bank account number is 73109.

no really it is

[lonestar]

Hey guys my bank account number is 73109.

no really it is

Damn, your checkbook must be a bitch to balance.

[erik16]

I received a (seems to be 419-Nigeria) private message on Facebook from some dude in freaking Benin, it seems. I'm thinking of creating a fake e-mail to reply him. I also sent a friend request to a dark-skinned person named Michael Laja, who seems to have a lot of African friends. Let's see if he's actually dead.

Dear Jaak ,

I'm Benard Aboagye, Private lawyer to Late Michael Laja,a national of your country, who used to work as the Director of petroliers total Benin on 27th of May 2008 my client and his family were involved in a car accident unfortunately lost their lives, my client had an account valued at about Nine Million Seven Hundred Thousand Dollars deposited in Bank here,

Please send your e-mail address and telephone number to
my e-mail (benardaboagyebj1@hotmail.com) so that I will send more details to you.

YOUR FULL NAME,PHONE NUMBER,YOUR.EMAIL

I wait to hear from you soon.

Thanks, Benard ABOAGYE
Mobile: 00229-98902182

N.B: Kindly send your information to my mail benardaboagyebj1@hotmail.com so that I will send more details to you quickly

[njdtfan]

Roll with it. It some good ol fun! Hook em LOL.

[Dr. DTVT]

As much fun as it is to make in-jokes and stuff, the surefire way to really get them is make them send you stuff.  It costs them money to ship things.  It also helps to have a work address you can receive things at so you don't have to give out your actual home information.  When someone tried to scam me when I was taking boarders, I actually got them to FedEx me the fake money orders a second time.  Overnighting stuff isn't cheap.  Also, get them to insure it as well.

[lonestar]

As much fun as it is to make in-jokes and stuff, the surefire way to really get them is make them send you stuff.  It costs them money to ship things.  It also helps to have a work address you can receive things at so you don't have to give out your actual home information.  When someone tried to scam me when I was taking boarders, I actually got them to FedEx me the fake money orders a second time.  Overnighting stuff isn't cheap.  Also, get them to insure it as well.

Or do a Blues Brother's move and have them mail it here....

1060 West Addison Street
Chicago, Illinois 60613

[chknptpie]

I would have them send stuff to
Suite 400
201 East Indianola Avenue
Phoenix, AZ 85012-2080

[njdtfan]

As much fun as it is to make in-jokes and stuff, the surefire way to really get them is make them send you stuff.  It costs them money to ship things.  It also helps to have a work address you can receive things at so you don't have to give out your actual home information.  When someone tried to scam me when I was taking boarders, I actually got them to FedEx me the fake money orders a second time.  Overnighting stuff isn't cheap.  Also, get them to insure it as well.

Or do a Blues Brother's move and have them mail it here....

1060 West Addison Street
Chicago, Illinois 60613

LOL Classic!

[VioletS16]

Dearest One,
Please contact me at (ritajoel0020@yahoo.co.jp)


I am Miss Rita Joel. from Sierra Leone.The only Daughter of Engr.Joel .Tega ,Ceo of Tega's Oilfilling Station and Tega's
shipping company Now Soldto USA Investors and the Chairman Youth DevlopmentUnion In My Town (DANTIRI)  ,We are writing you
from Rep. of Cote 'Ivoire where I have been taking refugeafter the brutal war and murder of our parents by therebels duringthere newed fighting in our country.
 
Because of the war our late Father sold his shippingcompany and took us to a nearby country Cote d'Ivoirewhere he depositedUS 4,000, 000.00 Million in his foreign account with one of the bank Here In A bidjanCote d'Ivoire , On his way Back His OilFilling Station Was Destroied and burnt down and they killed him. This money was annually paid into my late fathers accountfrom Shell petroleum development company(SPDC)and chevron  oil company operating in our locality for the compensation ofyouth and  community development in our jurisdictionwe need your help and due to the courrent political sutuation in Ivory Coast i am seeking for your assistance to transfer this Money and also relocate to your country to further my study.
 
Note Well: Please urgently confirm your willingness and interest to assist me by filling and se nding back to me the neededinformation below and also call me immediately on my private


1) Your FullName:-
2) YourAge:-....................
3)MaritalStatus:-.................
4) Your CellPhone Number:-............
5)YourCountry:-.......................
6) YourOccupation:-..............
7)Sex:-..............................
8)Your Religion:-...................
 
willing to offer you 30% of the total sum for your help. Please, for more
discussion contact us on this
Awaits to hear from you.
Rita Joel

Hmm................

[Riceball]

Riceball! Perform thread resurrection!

My dear,

I am Mrs. Deborah Gomez, from republic of Ireland, born in the state of Ohio USA. I am legally married to Mr. Goodman Khanyile a South Africa citizen born brought up in Switzerland, I live in Switzerland with my husband for 32 years before we move down to South Africa in 1985 after my husband retirement in 1974, I am 76 years old by the grace of God, I am a new Christian convert, suffering from long time cancer of the breast.

All indication from my doctor that my conditions is really deteriorating and it is quite obvious that I wouldn’t live more than two months, according to my doctors and in all indication regards to medical analysis.

This is because the cancer disease has gotten to a very bad stage that no hope for me to be a living person again. My dear husband was involved with the January 2000 Kenya airways plane crashed as you can see on the news line web site.https://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/africa/6627485.stm ) 40 years period of marriage life, still we could not produce any child, my late husband was very wealthy and after his death, I inherited some part of his business and money in the bank.

The doctors has advised me that I may not live for more than one months and 2 weeks and warn me to decease from thinking over who is going to inherit me, today I have decided to donate contribute to the less privileges, charity and orphanage homes.

I made this decision after listing to the news line about 100 years old woman who secretly donate her fortune upon her.
 Death,https://www.myfoxspokane.com/dpps/news/dpgoh-woman-donates-secret-millions-upon-her-death-fc-20100305_6410207\https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o8o-e-ilsum. I choose you after viewing your profile and I have confident in you because I have prayed. I am willing to donate the sum of $10.5million U.S Dollars, to the less privileged.

Please I want you to note that this fund is still in the bank where my husband deposited it. I am going to advice my lawyer to change my last will to your name and file in an application for the transfer of the money in your name.

lastly, I honestly pray that this money when transferred will be used for the said purpose even though I am late then or alive, because I have come to find out that wealth acquisition without God is vanity according to the wisest king in Israeli Solomon, and I made the promise to God that the fund will be use to help the needy and the less privilege.

May the grace of our lord the love of God and the fellowship of God be with you and your family, please further discussion contact me with my email address: mrs.gomezdeborah1935@gmail.com

I await urgent reply.

Mrs. Deborah Gomez

I like this bit:

This is because the cancer disease has gotten to a very bad stage that no hope for me to be a living person again.

She's got quite the racial backgroud too, an Irish American married to a Swiss South African.

[Ultimetalhead]

Oh goody. I haven't done this in a while. Give me a few days (maybe, I'm going to start working on it now, so it depends how inspired I am) and I'll whip something up.

[Millais]

that was a thoroughly enjoyable read. thanks guys!