Parents, don't dress your girls like tramps

[Super Dude]

https://www.cnn.com/2011/OPINION/04/19/granderson.children.dress/index.html

Parents, don't dress your girls like tramps

Grand Rapids, Michigan (CNN) -- I saw someone at the airport the other day who really caught my eye.

Her beautiful, long blond hair was braided back a la Bo Derek in the movie "10" (or for the younger set, Christina Aguilera during her "Xtina" phase). Her lips were pink and shiny from the gloss, and her earrings dangled playfully from her lobes.

You can tell she had been vacationing somewhere warm, because you could see her deep tan around her midriff thanks to the halter top and the tight sweatpants that rested just a little low on her waist. The icing on the cake? The word "Juicy" was written on her backside.

Yeah, that 8-year-old girl was something to see alright. ... I hope her parents are proud. Their daughter was the sexiest girl in the terminal, and she's not even in middle school yet.

Abercrombie & Fitch came under fire this spring for introducing the "Ashley," a push-up bra for girls who normally are too young to have anything to push up. Originally it was marketed for girls as young as 7, but after public outcry, it raised its intended audience to the wise old age of 12. I wonder how do people initiate a conversation in the office about the undeveloped chest of elementary school girls without someone nearby thinking they're pedophiles?

Push-up bikini controversy

What kind of PowerPoint presentation was shown to the Abercrombie executives that persuaded them to green light such a product?

That there was a demand to make little girls hot?

I mean, that is the purpose of a push-up bra, right? To enhance sex appeal by lifting up, pushing together and basically showcasing the wearer's breasts. Now, thanks to AF Kids, girls don't have to wait until high school to feel self-conscious about their, uhm, girls. They can start almost as soon as they're potty trained. Maybe this fall the retailer should consider keeping a plastic surgeon on site for free consultations.

We've been here with Abercrombie before -- if you recall, about 10 years ago they sold thongs for 10-year-olds -- but they're hardly alone in pitching inappropriate clothing to young girls. Four years ago the popular "Bratz" franchise introduced padded bras called "bralettes" for girls as young as six. That was also around the time the good folks at Wal-Mart rolled out a pair of pink panties in its junior department with the phrase "Who Needs Credit Cards" printed on the front.

I guess I've been out-of-the-loop and didn't realize there's been an ongoing stampede of 10-year-old girls driving to the mall with their tiny fists full of cash demanding sexier apparel.

What's that you say? Ten-year-olds can't drive? They don't have money, either? Well, how else are they getting ahold of these push-up bras and whore-friendly panties?

Their parents?

Noooo, couldn't be.

What adult who wants a daughter to grow up with high self-esteem would even consider purchasing such items? What parent is looking at their sweet, little girl thinking, "She would be perfect if she just had a little bit more up top."

And then I remember the little girl at the airport. And the girls we've all seen at the mall. And the kiddie beauty pageants.

And then I realize as creepy as it is to think a store like Abercrombie is offering something like the "Ashley", the fact remains that sex only sells because people are buying it. No successful retailer would consider introducing an item like a padded bikini top for kindergarteners if they didn't think people would buy it.

If they didn't think parents would buy it, which begs the question: What in the hell is wrong with us?

It's easy to blast companies for introducing the sexy wear, but our ire really should be directed at the parents who think low rise jeans for a second grader is cute. They are the ones who are spending the money to fuel this budding trend. They are the ones who are suppose to decide what's appropriate for their young children to wear, not executives looking to brew up controversy or turn a profit.

I get it, Rihanna's really popular. But that's a pretty weak reason for someone to dress their little girl like her.

I don't care how popular Lil' Wayne is, my son knows I would break both of his legs long before I would allow him to walk out of the house with his pants falling off his butt. Such a stance doesn't always makes me popular -- and the house does get tense from time to time -- but I'm his father, not his friend.

Friends bow to peer pressure. Parents say, "No, and that's the end of it."

The way I see it, my son can go to therapy later if my strict rules have scarred him. But I have peace knowing he'll be able to afford therapy as an adult because I didn't allow him to wear or do whatever he wanted as a kid.

Maybe I'm a Tiger Dad.

Maybe I should mind my own business.

Or maybe I'm just a concerned parent worried about little girls like the one I saw at the airport.

In 2007, the American Psychological Association's Task Force on the Sexualization of Girls issued a report linking early sexualization with three of the most common mental-health problems of girls and women: eating disorders, low self-esteem and depression. There's nothing inherently wrong with parents wanting to appease their daughters by buying them the latest fashions. But is getting cool points today worth the harm dressing little girls like prostitutes could cause tomorrow?

A line needs to be drawn, but not by Abercrombie. Not by Britney Spears. And not by these little girls who don't know better and desperately need their parents to be parents and not 40-year-old BFFs.

The opinions expressed in this commentary are solely those of LZ Granderson.

says: It may sound like a tired cliche to say that they're starting out younger all the time, but I think in this instance you can make a case for that complaint.  And I find it disturbing.

[sonatafanica]

says: I've been hanging out in the wrong airports.

[XJDenton]

I blame the parents.

Wait....

[Aramatheis]

I blame the parents.

Wait....

That was a well written article.

[Orbert]

My daughter is now 13 and, for both better and worse, she has inheritied her mother's most bodacious endowments.  Scares the fuck out of me because she's also quite tall and in general looks much older than she is.  My wife has observed college guys checking her out.  Those guys are fortunate, because if I had observed them, they would require medical attention.

I am absolutely ecstatic that her favorite clothes to wear are sweats and oversized T-shirts or sweatshirts.  I have always, always expounded upon the virtues of wearing clothes that are comfortable, and she grew up taking that to heart.  In retrospect, I should have actually promoted the burlap sackcloth as the ultimate fashion statement, and that it's perfectly fine to wear the same thing every day.  But this works, too.

[Cool Chris]

As someone who will be the father of a girl sometime within weeks, I will take note of this article.

Sort of an aside... but how did a guy go from ESPN's Page 2 to writing commentary for CNN?? The last article I saw of his made an argument that the policitally ignorant should not be allowed to vote. Sounds stupid, but philosophically I can't argue against a better informed electorate.

[Super Dude]

As someone who will be the father of a girl sometime within weeks, I will take note of this article.

Sort of an aside... but how did a guy go from ESPN's Page 2 to writing commentary for CNN?? The last article I saw of his made an argument that the policitally ignorant should not be allowed to vote. Sounds stupid, but philosophically I can't argue against a better informed electorate.

Same actually.  If you don't care enough to actually stay informed about the politicians and what they've actually done or not done with their time in office, why should you have the right to choose who stays and who goes?

[Orbert]

As someone who will be the father of a girl sometime within weeks, I will take note of this article.

Children are influenced by their peers of course, but parents have many years prior to that to ingrain good moral values into them, and a smart kid with a good moral center can withstand some pretty tough peer pressure.  Remember that, and also that it's your job to tell them No when the answer is most definitely No.  The kids do not buy the clothes, so I honestly don't blame the kids.  I don't care how much my kid would scream and rage, I'm not buying her clothes specifically designed to make her look like a slut.  No responsible parent would.

Sort of an aside... but how did a guy go from ESPN's Page 2 to writing commentary for CNN?? The last article I saw of his made an argument that the policitally ignorant should not be allowed to vote. Sounds stupid, but philosophically I can't argue against a better informed electorate.

I've always considered the right vote both a privilege and a burden.  If I'm gonna vote, I'm gonna make damned sure I know what I'm voting for.  I've gone to polls to specifically vote on a certain item (millage for schools, for example) and just left everything else blank because I didn't know the issues.  You could argue that I should have cared more, but I didn't.  At least I didn't compound my error by voting irresponsibly.

[Super Dude]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LuIPe6hZT3k

[El Barto]

As one just beginning my new role in life as a dirty old man,  I for one welcome America's continuing slide into depravity.

[King Postwhore]

As one just beginning my new role in life as a dirty old man,  I for one welcome America's continuing slide into depravity.

El Barto.  I look at girls at the malls now, I often wonder,  Damn that girl is hot and am I a perv if I could be her fathers age.  Mixed emotions all in one thought.

[Dr. DTVT]

Sort of an aside... but how did a guy go from ESPN's Page 2 to writing commentary for CNN?? 

I've been a reader of L.Z. for a number of years; even on ESPN his columns have focused on social issues, and ever since an incident regarding his sexuality (he's openly gay) a few years ago, he's been seeking a wider audience.

He's on point here though.  I saw a girl way to young wearing "Juicy" pants.

[El Barto]

There's an interesting flip-side to this whole deal.  There are plenty of parents who go way overboard in the opposite direction.  A couple of years ago I'm walking through Kroger's.  There's a woman who's pushing her cart with her young daughter riding in it, bucked in for safety of course, and I notice the girl has bra straps showing.  This kid couldn't have been any more than 4-tops.  Once I noticed that, I started paying attention and you actually see it all the time.  WTF kind of obsessive compulsion towards modesty makes parents put bras on their kids 5 years before they'll even think of sprouting?

[Cool Chris]

Parent stuff

People ask me if I am concerned about who she is going to date. Honestly, right now I am only concerned about dirty diapers and lack of sleep

He's on point here though.  I saw a girl way to young wearing "Juicy" pants.

My last job handled personalized clothing, caps, pens, etc… for organizations. And the conversation came up about words written on the butts of girls’ pants. Some people didn’t see anything wrong with it. The rest of us had to convince them that the whole point in writing on girls’ pants is to make you read what it says, and as such, look at the girl’s butt. Unless you want peoples’ eyes to be drawn in that direction, don’t put words there.

[Super Dude]

There's an interesting flip-side to this whole deal.  There are plenty of parents who go way overboard in the opposite direction.  A couple of years ago I'm walking through Kroger's.  There's a woman who's pushing her cart with her young daughter riding in it, bucked in for safety of course, and I notice the girl has bra straps showing.  This kid couldn't have been any more than 4-tops.  Once I noticed that, I started paying attention and you actually see it all the time.  WTF kind of obsessive compulsion towards modesty makes parents put bras on their kids 5 years before they'll even think of sprouting?

Based on the article, I'm disinclined to think it's a compulsion towards modesty.

[j]

I pray to God, Allah, Jesus, Vishnu, Zeus, Baal, and anybody who will listen that I never have a daughter.

-J

[El Barto]

There's an interesting flip-side to this whole deal.  There are plenty of parents who go way overboard in the opposite direction.  A couple of years ago I'm walking through Kroger's.  There's a woman who's pushing her cart with her young daughter riding in it, bucked in for safety of course, and I notice the girl has bra straps showing.  This kid couldn't have been any more than 4-tops.  Once I noticed that, I started paying attention and you actually see it all the time.  WTF kind of obsessive compulsion towards modesty makes parents put bras on their kids 5 years before they'll even think of sprouting?

Based on the article, I'm disinclined to think it's a compulsion towards modesty.

I wasn't referring to the people described in the article.  I'm referring to a completely different group that take the exact opposite approach.  I can assure you that the woman in the Kroger's wasn't trying to boost her daughter's sex appeal.

[Rina]

I pray to God, Allah, Jesus, Vishnu, Zeus, Baal, and anybody who will listen that I never have a daughter.

-J

I think I'd more just not want a daughter because I'd hate her friends.    I can't stand most teenage kids. (NOT DTF TEENAGERS OBVIOUSLY)

[ClairvoyantCat]

I can't stand them either.


I put up with a whole school full of them every day.  Those bastards. 

[Rina]

I can't stand them either.


I put up with a whole school full of them every day.  Those bastards. 

I know it's ridiculous considering I'm 18 and therefore one too, I just cannot stand the attitude, disrespect, and general trashy-ness of most young kids. It makes me feel like I'm that 80-year-old lady who screams at those "darn kids". 

[Phantasmatron]

What appalls me is seeing 8-year-olds in bikinis at amusement parks and water parks.  It's not so hot out here that your kid has to run around 90% naked.

[lonestar]

As most of you know, I am a father to a 17 year old girl.  This past weekend, our hotel hosted a junior prom for a local high school.  The short-short dresses, bareley covering their asses, mortified me.  Since when did that become the standard for high school dances.


(btw, my kid wore a beautiful, respectable, full length teal gown, god bless her theater nerd conservative heart)

[ClairvoyantCat]

Yeah, I see that at my prom too.  I remember going to prom as a freshman last year... I was pretty amazed at what they got away with.  Everyone (even my date) was drunk and was pretty much just having a seizure all over each other's pelvic area.  The school just turned it's head and pretended not to notice.

Given, I personally have no problem with people doing what they wanted to do.  It wasn't really my kind of thing.  No need for someone to come in and ruin their fun;  I just left. 

[Rina]

There's flatteringly showing off a nice figure, and then there's flaunting your sluttiness all over the place. Balance is needed.

[sonatafanica]

god bless her theater nerd heart

lonestar I think it's time we had a talk

[lonestar]

god bless her theater nerd heart

lonestar I think it's time we had a talk

What?  She has a boyfriend, and is sexually active, but still remains classy and conservative, instead of being a trampy slut like I see in some girls her age.  I'm more pleased that she has the self respect not to have to go too such extremes to attract attention. (I gather you were a theater nerd at some point?)

[ClairvoyantCat]

I think he was joking. 

[Aramatheis]

Balance is needed.

[sonatafanica]

god bless her theater nerd heart

lonestar I think it's time we had a talk

What?  She has a boyfriend, and is sexually active, but still remains classy and conservative, instead of being a trampy slut like I see in some girls her age.  I'm more pleased that she has the self respect not to have to go too such extremes to attract attention. (I gather you were a theater nerd at some point?)

WOAH WOAH WOAH


WOAH




WOAH MAN



I was just saying that I would be honored to have you for a father-in-law


so is it a deal yes or no come on i don't have all day

[lonestar]

I've read your comics, so no.

[sonatafanica]

You're just afraid that a moody cartoonist isn't going to be able to financially support her




which you are right about

[lonestar]

Plus she has good taste.

[Aramatheis]

 

[sonatafanica]

Alright, let's make this interesting


If I can turn a profit on a dick joke, your daughter marries me straight up


but if I CAN'T, I have to spend the rest of my life as a cartoonist


shake on it

[ClairvoyantCat]

I'd like to just interject here and say that I would treat your daughter like a princess, Lonestar, and I think we were made for each other; plus I'm going to be a lawyer and provide a steady source of income.  I think she should be mine.