Poll

Which is you:

Want to have kids
15 (18.5%)
Don't want to have kids
34 (42%)
Already Have kids
32 (39.5%)

Total Members Voted: 81

Author Topic: Do you want kids, don't want to have kids or have kids  (Read 3329 times)

0 Members and 2 Guests are viewing this topic.

Offline cramx3

  • Chillest of the chill
  • DTF.org Alumni
  • ****
  • Posts: 16385
  • Gender: Male
    • The Home of cramx3
Re: Do you want kids, don't want to have kids or have kids
« Reply #105 on: August 23, 2017, 03:15:07 PM »
My point is to just.. live your life and don't give a shit about the (invariable) criticism or judgement from people who haven't walked in your shoes at all.

Agreed, but they shouldn't have to walk in your shoes to understand people want to live their own lives their own way.  People need to understand that too.

My little sister gave birth a few weeks ago.  I thought being around the baby might spark some interest in wanting one myself, but got to say, it has not.  The little girl is so cute and all, but I feel like being an Uncle is probably better for me than being a Dad.  I get all the positives of the little girl and none of the negatives.  Seems like a good deal to me  :lol  I know it's not the same, but I honestly keep thinking something will spark in my mind to make me want to have children one day.  I thought by the time I hit 30 it would happen, then I thought being around kids would make it happen, well I'm not sure what will make it happen at this point.

Online Kattoelox

  • Firewings
  • Posts: 1029
Re: Do you want kids, don't want to have kids or have kids
« Reply #106 on: August 23, 2017, 03:27:54 PM »
No kids... don't want any, don't plan to have any... I have enough trouble taking care of myself to worry about that. :)

Offline Herrick

  • Posts: 302
  • Gender: Male
  • Hello Mangs
Re: Do you want kids, don't want to have kids or have kids
« Reply #107 on: August 26, 2017, 09:21:33 PM »
Where's the option for people who already have kids but don't want them?

LoL

I'm really surprised to see the poll numbers on this. I wonder what is the age of those who said they don't want kids. When I was 20 I knew I didn't want kids. I'm 36 and I still don't want any kids.

However, when I was 21 I ended up with a womang who already had two potty-trained kids. Moved in with them when I was 22 and married her when I was 23. I immediately went from a kid living at home with mom and dad to a kid living with a woman and two kids. Love is a hellofadrug  :lol

A few years ago my wife's infant nephew came to live with us. I've gotten to experience some of the nice and not so nice parts of having a baby...without actually having a baby. I've been puked on, dealt with tantrums etc. I've watched him learn to walk and talk. He says a lot of funny things even more so than other toddlers because he's bi-lingual. Despite him being a brat sometimes it's always nice to have him around. Nevertheless, I still have no desire to have kids of my own. I got vasectomatized when I was 25. No regrets. Best $10 I ever spent. Every time I hear a kid crying in public I thank Crom I didn't have to deal with that in my 20s and 30s and beyond.

I look at people in their early to mid 30s having kids and I think it's crazy. Who wants to take care of a kid in their 40s and 50s?
DISPLAY thy Breasts, My Julia!

Offline SchecterShredder

  • Posts: 428
  • Gender: Male
Re: Do you want kids, don't want to have kids or have kids
« Reply #108 on: August 29, 2017, 03:01:13 PM »
Where's the option for people who already have kids but don't want them?


I look at people in their early to mid 30s having kids and I think it's crazy. Who wants to take care of a kid in their 40s and 50s?

Spoken like a true individual without kids lol.

I just had my first a little over a year ago (I'm 34 now), and it's been the greatest addition to my life. All the sappy stuff they say about the happiness of having kids is completely true, and you just can't appreciate it until you have some of your own. The wife and I waited to have kids due to getting married in our late 20's, and then deciding to get grad degrees before doing the whole family thing. I'm glad we waited though because it's been a breeze doing this as actual adults, as opposed to 20 year old's who think they're mature adults. The only downside to waiting is that I likely won't be alive or will just be too damn old to enjoy any grandchildren.

Offline Stadler

  • DTF.org Alumni
  • ****
  • Posts: 10165
  • Gender: Male
Re: Do you want kids, don't want to have kids or have kids
« Reply #109 on: August 29, 2017, 03:27:23 PM »
Where's the option for people who already have kids but don't want them?


I look at people in their early to mid 30s having kids and I think it's crazy. Who wants to take care of a kid in their 40s and 50s?


Spoken like a true individual without kids lol.

I just had my first a little over a year ago (I'm 34 now), and it's been the greatest addition to my life. All the sappy stuff they say about the happiness of having kids is completely true, and you just can't appreciate it until you have some of your own. The wife and I waited to have kids due to getting married in our late 20's, and then deciding to get grad degrees before doing the whole family thing. I'm glad we waited though because it's been a breeze doing this as actual adults, as opposed to 20 year old's who think they're mature adults. The only downside to waiting is that I likely won't be alive or will just be too damn old to enjoy any grandchildren.

I was 33 when I had my first (and only) and now I'm 49 and have three more by marriage (all great, great kids, ranging from 23 to 9).  I wouldn't do it any other way.   I'm still young, healthy and in shape* and now with a grandson (23 year old just had his first), I find it very rewarding.  The three step kids have a total douche for a father (older two don't speak to him) and I am helping son renovate his house (the one my wife lived in before we married) and just helped daughter (19) buy a car.   Things "dad's" should do.  I don't at all think I'm replacing their dad, nor do they think that, but they ought to know - for when they decide if they want to be parents - what parenting is about. 


*depending, greatly, on your leniency of "in shape"
« Last Edit: August 30, 2017, 06:44:01 AM by Stadler »

Offline Cable

  • Posts: 1511
  • Gender: Male
Re: Do you want kids, don't want to have kids or have kids
« Reply #110 on: August 29, 2017, 06:32:49 PM »
Where's the option for people who already have kids but don't want them?


I look at people in their early to mid 30s having kids and I think it's crazy. Who wants to take care of a kid in their 40s and 50s?

Spoken like a true individual without kids lol.



It's a valid opinion though. There is a quality of life concern, for older people that have kids. That being said, development and being "settled" is being pushed out further. And people will continue to live longer, so it's more and more normalized.  Energy levels might be a different story :), but I could argue having youthful outlets increases vitality.
---

Offline SchecterShredder

  • Posts: 428
  • Gender: Male
Re: Do you want kids, don't want to have kids or have kids
« Reply #111 on: August 29, 2017, 09:37:09 PM »
Yeah,  i won't disagree that there are advantages to having kids earlier. My sister had her first at 18, quite accidentally,  but she had a vibrant social life through her 30s. I just don't think it's difficult at all for us. My wife and i are both in good shape though,  so our every levels aren't an issue.

Offline Dellers

  • Posts: 497
  • Gender: Male
  • Funky Norwegian!
Re: Do you want kids, don't want to have kids or have kids
« Reply #112 on: August 31, 2017, 09:27:22 AM »
I always kind of wanted kids. Couldn't really find a suitable girlfriend - until a short while ago. Now I really want kids, and truly think I have found the right woman (who also wants to have kids). Within a few years I'm fairly sure I'll be a dad. I hope I'm right.
https://soundcloud.com/dellers2/jpxi-o
Religious faith can only exist when there is no God, otherwise there wouldn't be a reason to believe.

Offline black_biff_stadler

  • 6th place finalist at New Orleans Skullet Fest 2010
  • DT.net Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 13479
  • Gender: Male
  • blackwater_floyd, get it?
Re: Do you want kids, don't want to have kids or have kids
« Reply #113 on: August 31, 2017, 04:39:53 PM »
Not only do I not want kids, I'm also gonna make sure my kids don't have kids.
Users who've sigged me (Join today!): LCArenas, Jakartabassplayer, LeeHarveyKennedy, Global Laziness, Portrucci, obscure, FlyingBIZKIT, alirocker08, senecadawg2, DebraKadabra, JayOctavarium, Cedar redaC, (almost) bout to crash, ? (the forum member, not the fucking punctuation mark), Zeltar, lonestar, ASacrificedSon

Offline SeventhDegree

  • of Inner Turbulence
  • Posts: 24
  • Gender: Male
Re: Do you want kids, don't want to have kids or have kids
« Reply #114 on: September 07, 2017, 08:23:05 PM »
No kids... don't want any, don't plan to have any... I have enough trouble taking care of myself to worry about that. :)

Me too!

I do however have three nieces and a nephew.  I adore all of them to death and I don't mind spoiling them at Christmas and on their birthdays but the fact is at the end of the day someone else is responsible for keeping food in their stomachs, a roof over their heads, clothes on their backs, getting them ready for school every morning, etc., etc., etc...


"I'm tired of Facebook, tired of my failing health
I'm tired of everyone, and that includes myself."
----------Steven Wilson, 2017

Offline Skeever

  • Posts: 1160
Re: Do you want kids, don't want to have kids or have kids
« Reply #115 on: September 08, 2017, 05:06:19 AM »
Have no desire to have kids, but feel some guilt about it. The rest of the family in my age bracket are reproducing like bunnies and I've never loathed get togethers more than I do today, what the hell happened? It used to be a good time, now it's 4 hours of talking about so and so's toddler, so and so is pregnant again... ugh  :lol

Pretty much agree with this:

I have always left open the possibility of a child later in life, but right now I absolutely do not want one. And while there are a few close friends and family with kids I like or tolerate, in most cases I don't like being around children. I am also constantly annoyed by the public and private push to have kids.

Offline SeventhDegree

  • of Inner Turbulence
  • Posts: 24
  • Gender: Male
Re: Do you want kids, don't want to have kids or have kids
« Reply #116 on: September 09, 2017, 08:58:41 AM »
Have no desire to have kids, but feel some guilt about it. The rest of the family in my age bracket are reproducing like bunnies and I've never loathed get togethers more than I do today, what the hell happened? It used to be a good time, now it's 4 hours of talking about so and so's toddler, so and so is pregnant again... ugh  :lol

I share your pain.

Ever since my two (younger) sisters got married and had kids, whenever we all get together, most of the time all that's talked about is is their kids.  I just sit there silently.  No one in my family is interested on how the last Dream Theater concert that I attended was.
"I'm tired of Facebook, tired of my failing health
I'm tired of everyone, and that includes myself."
----------Steven Wilson, 2017

Offline gmillerdrake

  • Proud Father.....Blessed Husband
  • DTF.org Member
  • *
  • Posts: 10553
  • Gender: Male
  • 1 Timothy 2:5
Re: Do you want kids, don't want to have kids or have kids
« Reply #117 on: September 09, 2017, 09:07:21 AM »
Have no desire to have kids, but feel some guilt about it. The rest of the family in my age bracket are reproducing like bunnies and I've never loathed get togethers more than I do today, what the hell happened? It used to be a good time, now it's 4 hours of talking about so and so's toddler, so and so is pregnant again... ugh  :lol

I share your pain.

Ever since my two (younger) sisters got married and had kids, whenever we all get together, most of the time all that's talked about is is their kids.  I just sit there silently.  No one in my family is interested on how the last Dream Theater concert that I attended was.

I can only tell you from experience that the reason you're encountering this is because once you have kids they consume pretty much all your time....your thoughts and energy. So, that's really all 'we' have to talk about  :lol   
Without Faith.....Without Hope.....There can be No Peace of Mind

Online TAC

  • DTF.org Alumni
  • ****
  • Posts: 25145
  • Gender: Male
  • Just a decent, normal metal-head fellow
Re: Do you want kids, don't want to have kids or have kids
« Reply #118 on: September 09, 2017, 06:29:55 PM »
One of my son's best friend's father is exactly my age and is totally into music. We had a cookout last weekend, and all we did was talk about music and metal. In fact in the early 90's, his band actually opened for Dream Theater (way down on the local bill).
would have thought the same thing but seeing the OP was TAC i immediately thought Maiden or DT related
Winger Theater Forums................or WTF.  ;D